Please, I need help

Every night before I go to sleep, I just lay there in disgust. I tell myself that tomorrow, I will change but I just can't do it. I'm told to just stop being lazy and eat well, but it's way easier said than done. I've dieted before and I've done very well, 14 lbs in 2 weeks. However the results weren't enough to keep me on track. When I'm around food, no matter what, I eat. It's like a disease. I need somebody to help me. Should I look around for a personal trainer? I don't know what to do. Please help!!
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Replies

  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,465 Member
    You are not diseased. There is a reason food is attractive. Food is life! I am going to make two book recommendations.

    The Power of Habit by Duhigg

    and

    Living a Healthy Life With Chronic Conditions

    https://www.bullpub.com/catalog/Living-a-Healthy-Life-with-Chronic-Conditions-4th-Edition
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,465 Member
    Oh, and follow Obese to Beast on YouTube.
  • innes24
    innes24 Posts: 10 Member
    Oh I know it's so hard. Try and take one day at the time, log every bit of food and go for walks long walks. Find healthy food options which you really like and don't mind eating a lot... and don't give up! You can do it!!!!
  • ScorpionQwean
    ScorpionQwean Posts: 1,024 Member
    Jake - change your mindset from looking at yourself in disgust to looking at yourself as this wonderful person who can accomplish anything! Your mind is the most powerful gift given to you - try NOT to let your emotions control your mind but your mind control your emotions. Tell yourself you can do this. Put up sticky notes around your room (bedroom / kitchen cabinets / refrigerator, etc.) with "positive" motivational sayings. The more you dwell in the negativity of how you feel, the harder it is for you to get to your goal.

    It's very difficult to "switch" your thinking process from negative to positive, but once you do that, it will come so easily to you for you to see yourself in a better place mentally. It takes time, do NOT give up so quickly, keep it going for weeks (not just 14 days)... you will see a difference.

  • gillexplores
    gillexplores Posts: 151 Member
    If you have specific foods that you particularly struggle with, I would suggest slowly fazing those out of your house. The healthier (or at least, less calorie-dense) the food is, the less likely you are to have severe over-calorie days!! This works (in general), for me. Also, as ScorpionQwean said... Try to change your mindset if you can. We're just human, and we're doing our best :)
  • pliler
    pliler Posts: 45 Member
    I've been there too bud, your not a lost cause. Don't restrict yourself so much that your suffering. Don't think you have to spend hours in the gym, run loads or eat only "clean" foods. Don't waste your money on a personal trainer if you don't have to, there is so much free information on YouTube, you just have to search for it. Kinobody, Hodge twins are good for a laugh. It's all about calories in vs calories out.
  • TiberiusClaudis
    TiberiusClaudis Posts: 423 Member
    I been there Mate. For 15 years I struggled with food addiction. I finally looked in the mirror and decided I wanted a change. I started out simply walking the dog...30 mins a day. And setting aside a shelf of food that I could eat that were healthy. The 30 mins then went to an hr..then 2. Then I started jogging. The fat melted off. The more I lost the more excited and determine I'd get. Lost 60lbs in 3 months. Then started weight lifting as well. Two years in I got on stage as a body builder. Everything has changed because of the day I was reborn. Trust me, the first month is the hardest. First only you notice, then close friends and family. Pretty soon you get comment of how much you lost...it keeps getting better. Many of us have been where you have been. It's that first big push to make a change that got us in going.
  • woznube7
    woznube7 Posts: 550 Member
    Story of my life!! You think you got the hang of it, and BAM. Back to square one. Please do not give up. Start out small. Maybe change one thing at a time (try to not eat any fast food for a week. I still have yet to master that.. usually I give in about three days in. :)) It does make a difference. Set little goals: Walk every day for a week, drink 80 oz of water every day for a week (but continue doing the things you did the weeks before). Pretty soon you'll surprise yourself. You're only human. You're your own worst critic/enemy/bully/etc. Mentally getting motivated is a lot harder than physically getting motivated. YOU GOT THIS!!
  • tcunbeliever
    tcunbeliever Posts: 8,270 Member
    I find small changes easier to deal with than big ones - I never get around to making big changes. Maybe try just logging everything you eat for a few weeks - good, bad, whatever, just log it all and focus on accuracy even if you don't like how much you are eating, just getting into the habit of tracking is a huge step. Then try adding in 10 min. of activity every day for a few weeks and log it - whatever activity you find most appealing - while still keeping up with the food log. So now you know what you are eating, and you are getting some activity every day and tracking activity. Then decide what small thing you want to change next - now you have a good idea what your average intake is each day/week, so you can try an adjustment there or you can adjust your activity up a bit. Small changes can change your life and they are so much easier for me than trying to stress out over a whole new lifestyle overnight.
  • jesguinn
    jesguinn Posts: 94 Member
    I was right where you are when I started- disgusted with myself, but just couldn't seem to get started. On the morning I noticed my belly jiggling as I walked to the shower, I decided to go to Quick Weight Loss Center. Laying out all that cash was painful (although it really does motivate me!), but having someone to hold me accountable has made a huge difference. Knowing that every other day I'm going to have to step on the scale in front of someone and let them scrutinize my food journal keeps me going. Of course, you don't have to pay for that! Do you have someone you can call on to help you? Someone that you can report to on a regular basis that can give you some tough love when you need it? Personally, I wouldn't want someone I really love (i.e. friend or family) to be that person because I might end up hating them in the end, but it could even be someone you've connected with through MFP.
  • JakeSweeney73
    JakeSweeney73 Posts: 15 Member

    Thank you all so much for your support. You're all very kind. This kind of support is exactly what I've been lacking. It really drives me to finally stop with all of the bull and just stick with it and get what I've wanted for most of my life. I really appreciate that you all took the time to message me. It's great to know that there are people who want to help me, and I'm grateful!
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 46,038 Member
    Every night before I go to sleep, I just lay there in disgust. I tell myself that tomorrow, I will change but I just can't do it. I'm told to just stop being lazy and eat well, but it's way easier said than done. I've dieted before and I've done very well, 14 lbs in 2 weeks. However the results weren't enough to keep me on track. When I'm around food, no matter what, I eat. It's like a disease. I need somebody to help me. Should I look around for a personal trainer? I don't know what to do. Please help!!
    Unless you change your habitual behavior WILLFULLY, then you'll continue.
    Personal trainers can help with exercise programs, but YOU have to want to do them. No one can force you.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png

  • c1ownfishie
    c1ownfishie Posts: 82 Member
    Just take it one day at a time. Even small steps will eventually get you to where you want to be. Stick with it and I promise it will be worth it! Best of luck to you!!!
  • cafeaulait7
    cafeaulait7 Posts: 2,459 Member
    Find your favorite foods and see if there is a similar option that has fewer calories. Check the labels. Or get a smaller serving size, take some home for a snack later, etc. I found all kinds of things that folks would not consider 'diet' or 'clean' that knock quite a few calories off what I normally eat. Don't set such an aggressive deficit, and you have more calories to play with. Really fast weight lost is not something I enjoy, so when I lose, I get to eat more, too! It's so much easier that way, and the weight loss still happens. I'd trade more calories for having to have a bit of patience any day ;)
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,459 Member
    Prepare for your week - if you leave eating to the very last minute, you're likely to make unhelpful choices, and will probably eat too much. Make a shopping list, get ready for this.

    Focus on nutrients that are likely to keep you full - fat, protein, fibre - to give yourself the best chance of success.
    Don't set such an aggressive deficit, and you have more calories to play with. Really fast weight lost is not something I enjoy, so when I lose, I get to eat more, too! It's so much easier that way, and the weight loss still happens. I'd trade more calories for having to have a bit of patience any day ;)

    +1 to this, seriously. Giving yourself a very hard to reach goal isn't motivating.

    If you have specific foods that you particularly struggle with, I would suggest slowly fazing those out of your house. The healthier (or at least, less calorie-dense) the food is, the less likely you are to have severe over-calorie days!! This works (in general), for me. Also, as ScorpionQwean said... Try to change your mindset if you can. We're just human, and we're doing our best :)

    +1 to this too.

    Good luck!
  • brianpperkins
    brianpperkins Posts: 6,124 Member
    Every night before I go to sleep, I just lay there in disgust. I tell myself that tomorrow, I will change but I just can't do it. I'm told to just stop being lazy and eat well, but it's way easier said than done. I've dieted before and I've done very well, 14 lbs in 2 weeks. However the results weren't enough to keep me on track. When I'm around food, no matter what, I eat. It's like a disease. I need somebody to help me. Should I look around for a personal trainer? I don't know what to do. Please help!!

    A pound per day is neither a realistic nor safe rate of loss. Step one, set realistic expectations ... they are a lot easier to stay on track for and eventually reach.
  • Oflamez
    Oflamez Posts: 43 Member
    edited December 2015
    change gradually and change your personality google how - self help ect - take action - don't go all out 12 pounds in 2 weeks is too fast and you will NEVER keep that pace and just crush and quit.

    Improve your personality and behaviors

    step by step increase your workouts - even just doing light gym exercises weight lifting for 30 minutes - to more.

    And most importantly change and improve your character - work ethic discipline the way you think

    you wanna build a character where you eat right and exercise regularly

    never go all or nothing or all out - it has to be possible to keep it up for the rest of your life

    change your habits

    use your free will

    stop pity start action

    punish yourself - not in extreme caloric resistance but by making you do workouts and eating right and buying and preparing the meals

  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,465 Member
    No decent coach would beat you up at the end of the game for what you haven't done. Yes, a little sober reflection at the end of the day for how you might have played this or that differently. Treat yourself at least as well as your best coach. Clean up your self talk. Then each day starts as a potential win.
  • auntienashnash
    auntienashnash Posts: 3 Member
    edited December 2015
    Jake, I so understand how you feel. I am a very strong and self-motivated person, but pushing myself to workout these days is a struggle due to chronic back pain. Although I know not moving makes it worse, I psych myself out most of the time, which makes me angry with myself. It's a vicious cycle. I try to remember that I would never be cruel to my daughter, my boyfriend, my niece, my sister or a friend because they were struggling. So we have to be as kind and motivational to ourselves as we would be to others. Find a way to love yourself as you are now and keep focus on discovering new and positive things in your life. Chin up! :)
  • ArwenP
    ArwenP Posts: 53 Member
    Something that helps me stay on track is logging my food at the start of the day, for the whole day. Sometimes I slip and have to edit it, but more often than not, I stick to whatever I logged.

    You could also try setting a small daily reward. It could be a food reward, like a weight watchers icecream bar, if you save enough calories during the day that you can eat it without going over your goal. Or it could be a non-food reward, such as recording all your favorite TV shows, and getting to watch one on days you hit your target. If you are over your calories, you have to go for a walk or something to put your net calories back into the green before you watch your show.

    I notice you don't have very many MFP friends here. You might reach out and look for folks with similar goals to link with here. I know seeing my friends' progress is motivating for me and we encourage each other along the way. It's really helpful. You can feel free to add me if you want.

    I'll second the comment about reading labels. Some things, that don't' sound healthy, are (like sloppy joes), and some things, that sound healthy, aren't (like zucchini bread). One kind of sandwich bread will be 160 calories a slice, while another will be 70. If you start looking at the labels, you can quickly find smart switches that can add up to a lot less calories in your day, without really changing what you eat.

    I also second making one or two small changes at a time; get those things to become habits before adding another small change. Maybe one you can start with, that a lot of people struggle with, is not drinking soda. It's amazing how many calories hide in beverages, but once you realize you can have a whole delicious chicken breast in place of 1 bottle of coke, it starts to be easier to let go of it.

    Set smart goals too. Any more than about 2lbs a week isn't really healthy. Set yourself up for success by taking your time to do it well, a little at a time, and you'll make it. Sometimes it's a struggle, but it's worth fighting for yourself!