Preparing separate meals for you and your family difficulty

Morning MFP . I'm starting back up with a 6 month set back and a 15lb weight gain on top of what I was trying to lose. I have done MFP before with success... but gained it all back because I went in it too hard and burned myself out. I was wondering if there was any tips and tricks for having to make meals for your family that doesn't correlate with your diet? I do not have any discipline at all. My family loves hearty meals and my husband refuses to do any changes.... which leaves me to eat something that is less appetizing than what they are having for the night. I'm desperate and need help!!!!! Please help!
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Replies

  • ki4eld
    ki4eld Posts: 1,213 Member
    Wish I could help. I accommodate allergies and religious restrictions, but otherwise, you eat what I cook or you go hungry. Or you can cook/clean it yourself. I'm not locking the fridge and disconnecting the stove, but I'm not running a restaurant either. "Eat it or don't" is my motto.
  • JenMc14
    JenMc14 Posts: 2,389 Member
    I don't do separate meals, for the most part. I portion mine out to stay on track. I also don't tend to cook super high calorie meals, for the most part. I already have cut most rice and pasta because my husband cuts those things out. We do eat a lot of the same things over and over, but it works for us. Plus, I'm the one cooking, so if they want something else, they can cook! ;)
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
    We don't eat separate meals. I may eat less of one dish and he may eat more of it but we all eat the same thing. What are you trying to eat and what do they want to eat?
  • Queenmunchy
    Queenmunchy Posts: 3,380 Member
    When I make meal plans I sit with the family to do it.
    This week we did shepherd's pie, two kinds of broiled chicken wings, quesadillas, sofrito chicken zucchini boats, bbq jalapeno chicken meatballs. Next week we have sausage/zucchini lasagna, Thai peanut chicken, burgers and fries.

    I may make some swaps here and there, but these are all pretty much in the 300-400 calorie range (some even lower).
  • vickyhopkins93
    vickyhopkins93 Posts: 1 Member
    If I was you I would still eat whatever you make but swap the carb so say your partners having white potato have sweet potato, or if there having white rice make brown rice, otherwise you'll end up wanting to indulge in whatever there eating anyway learnt from experience hope this helps slightly x
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    i'm the cook in my home...people eat what i cook or they go hungry.

    also, i don't really believe in the notion of "diet food"...i eat food in quantities that are appropriate for me...my wife eats food in quantities that are appropriate for her.

    generally dinner is some kind of protein, a grain or starch, and a veg unless i'm doing a soup or stew. that can be as hearty or non hearty as you like depending on portions.
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    I do the cooking, therefore they eat what I make. And yes, I'm mostly selfish about it, but I'm not on any crazy diet where I restrict food groups or make weird diet-y stuff. It's just regular food. We eat a lot of chicken (prepared in different ways), steak, fish, paired with rice and vegetables. Pizza night once a week. Sometimes we have breakfast for dinner. They are welcome to make their own food if they don't like what I make.
  • RAinWA
    RAinWA Posts: 1,980 Member
    Smaller portions of what they are having and load up on the veggies. Last night I made turkey burgers - my husband had cheese on his along with tater tots and broccoli (one of the few veggies he will eat). Mine was plain with squash and broccoli - I cooked the squash at the same time I cooked the tots.

    If I'm making a casserole or something similar, I just take a smaller portion and fill up my plate with whatever veggies I want.

    It takes a little practice but you can do it.
  • mitch16
    mitch16 Posts: 2,113 Member
    Same as many others... I don't make separate meals, I'm just careful about my portion sizes and add either a large veggie salad or steamed veggies while reducing the potatoes/rice for myself.

    I plan some of the most "dangerous" meals for nights when I know I will not be home to eat so I won't be tempted. (For example, Tuesday night is taco night at our house, but I have a yoga class from 6:30 until 8:00 so I usually just have yogurt and fruit beforehand.)
  • kristen6350
    kristen6350 Posts: 1,094 Member
    I make the 1 meal and eat a smaller portion, or just not eat the starch I make. I also don't look at any food as "off limits".
  • mkakids
    mkakids Posts: 1,913 Member
    I do 100% of the cooking. I don't make different meals.

    I cook super simply though....a protein and a veggie for each meal. That's it.
  • rlgreen2
    rlgreen2 Posts: 11 Member
    Sorry I can't help. Dinner was the one meal I never changed because it's the one my husband and I eat together. I just adjusted my portion sizes for dinner and continued to eat the same things. I eat breakfast alone and my lunch at work. Those are the meals I made most of my changes to because they only affect me. Good luck!

    This is the same for me for the most part, although sometimes I will make an easy modification such as having a baked potato when husband and kids are having fries, or add a salad or extra veggie so that I eat less of the high calorie stuff. Adjusting portion sizes (and not eating off the kids' plates) is key!
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    My man is a foot taller than me so naturally eats more. I take less in general and proportionally more veggies and less starch.

    So if you were to have a hearty meal like beef stew, you could take a smaller portion plus 100 grams of broccoli or your favorite high volume, low calorie veg.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    I took a picture of hubby and my dinner this week, a pasta dish with salad on the side. The only difference between our two meals was the portion size. He had more pasta, I had more salad. But I also pumped mine up with parmesan and sunflower seeds.

    We don't eat separately, we just eat differently.
  • Jruzer
    Jruzer Posts: 3,501 Member
    I eat what my wife makes for dinner and adjust portions accordingly.
  • SingRunTing
    SingRunTing Posts: 2,604 Member
    We eat the same things, I just measure out my portions. Sometimes my husband will add something else (like bread or cheese) since he needs more calories than I do. But our menu hasn't really changed much.
  • ZeroDelta
    ZeroDelta Posts: 242 Member
    If my nutritional needs align with my wife's we eat the same meal. If not, I cook my own.
  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    Healthy food can be hearty
    look together and find recipes you both can enjoy
  • Lleldiranne
    Lleldiranne Posts: 5,516 Member
    We just make "regular" dinner for the family. But, it's food that fits into my diet (i.e. there's vegetables, protein, etc) and then I control the portions for myself. After all, shouldn't the kids be learning to eat those same kinds of healthy dinners?

    And yes, sometimes, we do have less healthful meals, but not too often. And I fit them into my week.

    It also helps that I tend to eat smaller breakfast and lunch so I have more calories left for dinner.
  • uaeevo
    uaeevo Posts: 2 Member
    I'm having the same issue as my wife don't want to follow my diet plan and she's hesitating to make two separate meals for us as she's fit and I'm over weight.

    The best thing to do is to eat the same food but smaller portion. Wish me luck.
  • burtisfamily7
    burtisfamily7 Posts: 44 Member
    I will not, do not separate meals! LOL It is too much! I am not a short order cook! I have a family of 7, 5kids. I sometimes i modify for me, but my family eats the same thing i do. (Notice i dont eat the same as them) If i want a vegetarian meal, family comes along. lol Even meat and potato Husband. I make good food, so I dont get complaints. Sometimes hubby rebels and has to have prime rib, great! I want to promote, a healthy, Organic, good food lifestyle, I want kids to practice portion control, and to broaden their palates. I am the one cooking (most of the time) so its up to me :) My kids are 12-19. 4 girls, one boy. So they alternate meals and Im teaching them to prepare healthy foods, so i just eat smaller portions if necessary (like loaded homemade mac and cheese) . But when its their turn to cook, i am proud of their choices! So I dont usually have to worry! Last time i tried to lose weight and separated meals, I failed, i was overwhelmed. Its a lifestyle change not a quick weight loss tool.
  • Lleldiranne
    Lleldiranne Posts: 5,516 Member
    I will not, do not separate meals! LOL It is too much! I am not a short order cook! I have a family of 7, 5kids. I sometimes i modify for me, but my family eats the same thing i do. (Notice i dont eat the same as them) If i want a vegetarian meal, family comes along. lol Even meat and potato Husband. I make good food, so I dont get complaints. Sometimes hubby rebels and has to have prime rib, great! I want to promote, a healthy, Organic, good food lifestyle, I want kids to practice portion control, and to broaden their palates. I am the one cooking (most of the time) so its up to me :) My kids are 12-19. 4 girls, one boy. So they alternate meals and Im teaching them to prepare healthy foods, so i just eat smaller portions if necessary (like loaded homemade mac and cheese) . But when its their turn to cook, i am proud of their choices! So I dont usually have to worry! Last time i tried to lose weight and separated meals, I failed, i was overwhelmed. Its a lifestyle change not a quick weight loss tool.

    Thank you! You said what I was trying to, but so much better. (I also have 5 kids, age 1-17). It's really more an issue of portion size than kinds of foods, at least for us. And I want my kids to learn to make and enjoy the healthy meals, just like my grandma taught me.
  • cathipa
    cathipa Posts: 2,991 Member
    When I make meal plans I sit with the family to do it.
    This week we did shepherd's pie, two kinds of broiled chicken wings, quesadillas, sofrito chicken zucchini boats, bbq jalapeno chicken meatballs. Next week we have sausage/zucchini lasagna, Thai peanut chicken, burgers and fries.

    I may make some swaps here and there, but these are all pretty much in the 300-400 calorie range (some even lower).

    Can I come to your house for dinner?? That sounds delicious!

    But OP I agree with the others. I make the same meal for everyone and portion mine out. No need to eat special foods unless there is a sensitivity/allergy.
  • soapsandropes
    soapsandropes Posts: 269 Member
    My parents only ever made one meal. There was always plenty of salad to have on the side if you didn't like/didn't want a big helping of the main dish. Nothing wrong with hearty foods, just learn to eat less and if you need to add in bulk a vegetable side is great.
  • 100df
    100df Posts: 668 Member
    They eat what I cook. Motivates me to find tasty options beyond chicken.

    They complain about the lack of cookies and chips much more. I don't feel badly as there is plenty of fruit, yogurt and string cheese.
  • dawnmcneil10
    dawnmcneil10 Posts: 638 Member
    I always have options available for example, say tonight I'm having quinoa, chicken and roasted veggies. My hubby isn't a fan of roasted veggies so he'll heat up a different veggie (frozen or canned) and we'll both pick our own seasonings for the chicken. He may have BBQ sauce for example while I do cajun style dry rub.

    I still make homemade mac and cheese, I buy the smart taste pasta because hubby doesn't care for whole wheat use a reduced fat cheese mixed with regular and on my half of the pan I add broccoli.

    If you're running the oven to bake something toss in a few extra potatoes, regular or sweet potato, those will become options for another night.

    Making spaghetti and meatballs? while the pasta is cooking toss some chopped zucchini or broccoli in the steamer portion and have that either in place of pasta or to cut back on the amount of pasta you eat.

    Often times we think their food vs our food and it's really not like that, we all have different tastebuds so work with that. Kids want chicken nuggets for dinner, ok fine the whole family has chicken nuggets but mom eats them on top of a big salad while the kids and dad maybe prefer fries.

    Hopefully the examples help a little and you feel a little less overwhelmed in the kitchen.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    I pretty much eat the same meal as my family and have not changed my diet a great deal. I have a smaller portion, sometimes skip bread/cheese/condiments or have a lot more vegetables on my plate though than my family. We all have different calorie needs or preferences but I don't cook seperate meals for everyone.
    I pre-log my food which helps me figure out what I can eat.

    You have to eat the way you are going to for the rest of your life or it will be very difficult to sustain.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    edited December 2015
    moyer566 wrote: »
    Healthy food can be hearty
    look together and find recipes you both can enjoy

    just belaboring this point...there seems to be this perception by many that healthy means bland and boring and/or eating nothing but dry salad...nothing could be further from the truth.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,961 Member
    moyer566 wrote: »
    Healthy food can be hearty
    look together and find recipes you both can enjoy

    Agreed. I just made a chicken stew that used chicken breast, potato, turkey gravy and frozen veggies. Looked really hearty but was only 300 calories for my portion. And it feels filling. Even my husband only had 1 portion (though I think he had a little dessert after).
  • Lovee_Dove7
    Lovee_Dove7 Posts: 742 Member
    The most important part of my diet is the veggies I eat, so I get those ready the night before. I put all the veggies I'm going to eat (454g of non-starchy veggies) in a dish in the fridge.
    The next important thing to have is some easy-to-make protein sources:
    individually frozen fish (cod, salmon, tilapia)
    frozen chicken breast tenders (unseasoned, uncooked, frozen)
    already -cooked beef roast, sliced
    protein drink mix

    This will make your own meals easy and filling.

    Actually my family all copied my way of eating, even though I didn't ask them to. Literally even my 9 and 11yo make salads and stir-fry's for breakfast, and my husband makes a big salad for breakfast. I seriously never expected that, but you may find that your family copies your healthy eating, because what you are fixing smells so good! The roasting meats and sauteing veggies.
    I get out the knives and cutting boards and all the colorful veggies, and they think it's fun and interesting to make their own meals.