How to not hate yourself

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choirgeekfolife
choirgeekfolife Posts: 2 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Definitely binged this month on a 4 day trip to texas and a few cheat days here and there. I've gained 7-8 pounds even after being clean for a week and working out. My husband and I are super stressed cause we're having house problems, so I know that's probably it and we're living in a hotel and not really grocery shopping; just getting free food from the hotel. But really. I am hating myself so bad. :( I feel like a failure.

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  • freespirit427
    freespirit427 Posts: 65 Member
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    Dont feel like a failure. Failure is giving up. Stick with it, you can do it! I hope your situation looks up soon!
  • trublutopaz
    trublutopaz Posts: 70 Member
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    Try getting the self contained salads at the store and pick up some fresh fruit. You'll both feel better with some veggies. Perhaps see if a local gym will let you use their facilities on a per day basis.
  • ktvalerio
    ktvalerio Posts: 4 Member
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    You know something? I just went through that myself this year (not the house problems, but the illness and death of my dad). Forgive yourself. You are not a failure. Just start tracking and eating healthy again when you can and don't worry about it right now. You WILL get back on track when the time is right.
  • BekahC1980
    BekahC1980 Posts: 474 Member
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    Fwiw: stress can add weight. You're not a failure
  • trublutopaz
    trublutopaz Posts: 70 Member
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    My sister in law gave me a book on Meditation. It's called "Natural Meditation" and it's about learning to relax into yourself. Maybe a local library has something similar you could use to destress.
  • JellybeanJeanette
    JellybeanJeanette Posts: 10 Member
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    I'n sorry to hear that you are having house problems. This time of year makes that even harder.

    I'm an emotional eater, and nothing makes me more emotional than the expectations of the holidays, especially combined with PMS! And there is chocolate everywhere! I've been really sick with myself....

    I at least took two positive steps today- I pulled out a new blank journal to try and get some if the frustration down on paper and I got my 10,000 steps in.

    Tomorrow, I will skip the chocolate and focus on "real" food.

    How about we check in with each other tomorrow night?
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
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    Forget all that "eating clean" stuff, and focus what attention, time and energy you have at the moment on just sticking to your calorie limit with whatever food you have available.

    Now is a time to keep things simple. Don't make things even harder for yourself by demonising foods or being too restrictive.

    Kind regards.






  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    Do a kindness for someone. Write a thank you note.

    Wooden's pyramid is the best I've come across for building self worth.

    http://www.coachwooden.com/pyramid-of-success#Pyramid

    In the meantime you have just gone through a very stressful event. Be kind to yourself.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,708 Member
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    Think of all the people in the world who would love to trade places with right now. Kids that beg in the street for money just to get food. Families of 5 or more huddled in a small room with a dirt floor no running water or even a bathroom to use.
    You're only viewed as a failure in your eyes. To them, you have a great opportunity that they will NEVER probably get.
    It ain't that bad. Buck up.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
  • vivmom2014
    vivmom2014 Posts: 1,647 Member
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    choirgeekfolife wrote: »
    Definitely binged this month on a 4 day trip to texas and a few cheat days here and there. I've gained 7-8 pounds even after being clean for a week and working out. My husband and I are super stressed cause we're having house problems, so I know that's probably it and we're living in a hotel and not really grocery shopping; just getting free food from the hotel. But really. I am hating myself so bad. :( I feel like a failure.

    Maybe your two shakes a day of Herbalife had something to do with binging? Just a thought.

  • Clobern80
    Clobern80 Posts: 714 Member
    edited December 2015
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    Most people will probably not agree, but even I am not a failure... a guy who lost 150 pounds years ago only to gain back 132 of that. It's pretty awful. But if I were a failure, I would not recognize the fact that I have a problem and need to fix it. Don't get down about having a binge, get start doing what you were doing before. Don't even go through "3 day fixes" or fasts, that won't do anything but remind you of how miserable you may be feeling. Just start anew right now and things will straighten out soon enough.
  • AnvilHead
    AnvilHead Posts: 18,344 Member
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    Just my opinion - if one hates themself in the first place, weight loss isn't going to change anything because they'll just find some other reason to hate themself and consider themself a failure. Get that part fixed first. Self-hate has much deeper rooted issues than a few pounds of weight.
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
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    Hating yourself is counterproductive.

    One piece of advice I like is "eat like an adult." This is elaborated on as "adults focus on what the food can do for them, nutrition as well as taste, and also don't beat themselves up for eating choices." It's just food, if you made a bad choice, who cares, you can make better choices going forward.
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,627 Member
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    why would i hate myself? im pretty *kitten* awesome and a whole lot more than what i weigh or what i eat.....

    so are you.
  • Gamliela
    Gamliela Posts: 2,468 Member
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    callsitlikeiseeit wrote: »
    why would i hate myself? im pretty *kitten* awesome and a whole lot more than what i weigh or what i eat.....

    so are you.

    Best advice so far.

  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
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    choirgeekfolife wrote: »
    Definitely binged this month on a 4 day trip to texas and a few cheat days here and there. I've gained 7-8 pounds even after being clean for a week and working out. My husband and I are super stressed cause we're having house problems, so I know that's probably it and we're living in a hotel and not really grocery shopping; just getting free food from the hotel. But really. I am hating myself so bad. :( I feel like a failure.

    You cannot change the choices you made. They're done. Let them go. You cannot change that you gained weight, and you cannot change that you had house problems and are in a hotel.

    Weight gain is a result of cals in > cals out. Regardless of the food you get, ensure you are eating less than you are burning and you will start to lose that weight. If you're in a hotel, chances are that you have access to fitness equipment. Use it.

    Turn your feeling into action. Regret does you no good. Learn from the mistakes, forgive them, and move on.

    Everyone fails. Success and change is not a linear progression - you will have up and down days. You've now had your down days, time to start pushing forward.
  • lingo10
    lingo10 Posts: 305 Member
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    Sure you may get setbacks but assess what triggers it and what you can do differently, dont obsess, we are human after all. Everything will be okay. If you fail, so what, you try again. <3 Progress forward.
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
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    This is not a big setback at all think of all the other awesome things about yourself make a list of only positive things about yourself do it right now get a pen and a sheet of paper or start a thread and put down at least ten things you like about you
    Then think about the list and nothing else
    Thats all happy new year

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