How to deal with girlfriend ruining my diet?

Hi guy,

I'm having a hard time dieting. I don't mind eating broccoli and chicken breast every single day, but my problem is my girlfriend, she always want to go to out. Often when we go out, we eat out. Also, when I buy her food she doesn't finish it so I often have to eat her food. Is there any tips would be very helpful.
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Replies

  • kgirlhart
    kgirlhart Posts: 5,165 Member
    If she doesn't eat her food you do not have to eat it. You can save it and have it for lunch or just throw it out. You can eat out and lose weight, but you will have to look for lower calorie choices and probably not eat everything since restaurants tend to have huge portion sizes.
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,463 Member
    You don't have to eat her food. She can take it home for another meal.
  • nvmomketo
    nvmomketo Posts: 12,019 Member
    Go for drinks instead?
  • jdhcm2006
    jdhcm2006 Posts: 2,254 Member
    Talk to her. Tell her that you're trying to lose weight and the continuous eating out isn't helping you stick to your plan. Also, you don't have to eat her food when you go out. Take it as a leftover and tell her to eat it when she gets hungry later. Or you could eat it later. Find different date ideas that don't revolve around food. When you do go out to eat, only eat half of the portion and take the rest for a later meal. Order appetizers instead of a full meal. Drink water instead of alcohol or soda. Those are the best things I can think of.
  • besaro
    besaro Posts: 1,858 Member
    talk to her?
  • allaboutthefood
    allaboutthefood Posts: 781 Member
    You can make healthier choices while out and you don't have to eat what's left on her plate, or you can suggest on doing something else. Maybe some kind of fun activity it doesn't need to be food.
  • misskarne
    misskarne Posts: 1,765 Member
    Stop blaming her for your bad choices. You don't "have" to finish her food. You CHOOSE to finish her food. Eating out doesn't have to mean you blow your calorie count - you could pick lower-calorie items.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    You don't need to eat broccoli and chicken breast every day.

    You don't need to finish other people's food.

    Eat the food you feel like, so long as you stay within your calorie limit.

    Don't make excuses for going over your calorie limit.

    Make sure your calorie limit and weekly weight loss goal are not too aggressive. This isn't a race.

    Kind regards and best wishes.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    Why do you have to eat the food she doesn't finish? Why do you HAVE to eat her food?
  • oduca
    oduca Posts: 4 Member
    edited January 2016
    Thanks guys!! I will keep that in mind next time we go out.

    I just feel so weak and give in to temptation when I see salty and sweet food, then I tend to over eat. It's easier for me not to see junk food, so I don't over eat. Is there a way to reduce my appetite? It's so hard keeping on track, I don't know... it's hard to explain. It's like I'm addicted to food when I see them.

    I eat my girlfriend's food because I feel bad that it's going to waste, and like I said I tend to over eat. You guys are right, I will try my best just to bring it home and eat it later on.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    Be nice to yourself and give yourself the diet you deserve. A balanced diet with things you love in moderation.

    Don't punish yourself with too much or too little. You are good enough to be at your best.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,989 Member
    oduca wrote: »
    Hi guy,

    I'm having a hard time dieting. I don't mind eating broccoli and chicken breast every single day, but my problem is my girlfriend, she always want to go to out. Often when we go out, we eat out. Also, when I buy her food she doesn't finish it so I often have to eat her food. Is there any tips would be very helpful.
    Lol, she's not forcing you to eat and she's not on your diet. So if you go out, share with her. You're eating what's left anyway.
    The other thing is DON'T go out so often. Learn to cook at home and have her do it too. Because if this is the person you intend to stay with, they BETTER know how to cook anyway.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png

  • SueSueDio
    SueSueDio Posts: 4,796 Member

    "I'm on a seafood diet - I see food and I eat it!" ;)

    I feel your pain - it's hard to cut back, especially when your loved ones are enjoying treats you know you can't have. I've been working on finding healthier substitutes so I can have a treat too!

    Try checking out the online nutrition guides of some of your favourite places to eat, and make a note of the healthier choices. That way at least you'll have an idea of your options when you're out and she suggests a restaurant, and won't be caught on the hop and make a poor choice. You might decide to visit a different place that has healthier options instead, or perhaps ask for a smaller portion (some restaurants offer this anyway). And like other people said you can always take some home for another meal, although I know how hard it is NOT to eat everything when it's right there in front of you and someone else is happily eating all of theirs... :)

    You might be surprised at what you learn from the nutrition guides, though - we went out a couple of days ago, and I was really shocked at the amount of calories in the salad with chicken I thought I'd have to have. I ended up with steak, potatoes and vegetables for way fewer calories and more protein, and probably felt more full than I would have with my original choice.
  • Mavrick_RN
    Mavrick_RN Posts: 439 Member
    Sounds like your girlfriend has more sense than you. She gets free food, eats what she wants, leaves the rest for you to clean up and you complain she's forcing you to do it. You don't need to be her garbage disposal.

    Next time make her pay for it, that way it's not "your" food being wasted. Eat what you want of your own food. Go dancing or some fun activity to have a date that's not just about food.
  • oduca
    oduca Posts: 4 Member
    edited January 2016
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    oduca wrote: »
    Hi guy,

    I'm having a hard time dieting. I don't mind eating broccoli and chicken breast every single day, but my problem is my girlfriend, she always want to go to out. Often when we go out, we eat out. Also, when I buy her food she doesn't finish it so I often have to eat her food. Is there any tips would be very helpful.
    Lol, she's not forcing you to eat and she's not on your diet. So if you go out, share with her. You're eating what's left anyway.
    The other thing is DON'T go out so often. Learn to cook at home and have her do it too. Because if this is the person you intend to stay with, they BETTER know how to cook anyway.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png


    You are right, it's was my desicion to eat. No excuses. Now I need help not to overeat. I would eat my food and then my gf's leftovers. I will try to bring it home next.

    I just can't help not to overeat. Even though I know I'm full but for some reason I don't feel full when I see food, specially salt or spicy I tend to over eat untill I'm bloated. I hate this feeling. I have no self control. What should I do?
  • QueenofHearts023
    QueenofHearts023 Posts: 421 Member
    edited January 2016
    oduca wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    oduca wrote: »
    Hi guy,

    I'm having a hard time dieting. I don't mind eating broccoli and chicken breast every single day, but my problem is my girlfriend, she always want to go to out. Often when we go out, we eat out. Also, when I buy her food she doesn't finish it so I often have to eat her food. Is there any tips would be very helpful.
    Lol, she's not forcing you to eat and she's not on your diet. So if you go out, share with her. You're eating what's left anyway.
    The other thing is DON'T go out so often. Learn to cook at home and have her do it too. Because if this is the person you intend to stay with, they BETTER know how to cook anyway.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png


    You are right, it's was my desicion to eat. No excuses. Now I need help not to overeat. I would eat my food and then my gf's leftovers. I will try to bring it home next.

    I just can't help not to overeat. Even though I know I'm full but for some reason I don't feel full when I see food, specially salt or spicy I tend to over eat untill I'm bloated. I hate this feeling. I have no self control. What should I do?

    How about doing something else that requires a lot of attention? Usually when I start drawing I'm so into it that I forget to eat, no matter how much food I have in the house.

    Try not to focus so much on food. Eat to live, don't live to eat.

    Edit to add: Weigh out your portion of food and put the rest away where you can't see it.
  • seiffertrk
    seiffertrk Posts: 49 Member
    oduca wrote: »
    I just can't help not to overeat. Even though I know I'm full but for some reason I don't feel full when I see food, specially salt or spicy I tend to over eat untill I'm bloated. I hate this feeling. I have no self control. What should I do?

    I have been dealing with self control issues in my life by trying to be more intentional. I do this by putting whatever it is I'm about to do to the question "will this take me closer to or further from my goals?" Usually when I think of things that way I can stop myself from doing the things that will take me further from my goals.

    I don't know if it will work for you, but it may be something to try.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    oduca wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    oduca wrote: »
    Hi guy,

    I'm having a hard time dieting. I don't mind eating broccoli and chicken breast every single day, but my problem is my girlfriend, she always want to go to out. Often when we go out, we eat out. Also, when I buy her food she doesn't finish it so I often have to eat her food. Is there any tips would be very helpful.
    Lol, she's not forcing you to eat and she's not on your diet. So if you go out, share with her. You're eating what's left anyway.
    The other thing is DON'T go out so often. Learn to cook at home and have her do it too. Because if this is the person you intend to stay with, they BETTER know how to cook anyway.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png


    You are right, it's was my desicion to eat. No excuses. Now I need help not to overeat. I would eat my food and then my gf's leftovers. I will try to bring it home next.

    I just can't help not to overeat. Even though I know I'm full but for some reason I don't feel full when I see food, specially salt or spicy I tend to over eat untill I'm bloated. I hate this feeling. I have no self control. What should I do?

    You do have self control. This post explains why:
    pondee629 wrote: »
    When you go to a party with an open bar, do you always get falling down drunk?

    When you see a very attractive member of the opposite gender, do you always make inappropriate moves on that person?

    When someone disagrees with you, do you violently oppose them, even if you want to?

    Do you get up and go to work every day even though you really don't like your job?

    When an office superior says something stupid, do you immediately and loudly correct that person?

    OK. Will power ain't the problem. We can, and do, control many, many impulses. If you want to lose weight, you must control your caloric intake. ONLY EAT THE CANDY THAT YOU WILL FIT INTO YOUR CALORIC BUDGET!

    Act like a responsible adult, you do on the rest of lifes decisions. This is one you have made.

  • dhimaan
    dhimaan Posts: 774 Member
    Mavrick_RN wrote: »
    Sounds like your girlfriend has more sense than you. She gets free food, eats what she wants, leaves the rest for you to clean up and you complain she's forcing you to do it. You don't need to be her garbage disposal.

    Next time make her pay for it, that way it's not "your" food being wasted. Eat what you want of your own food. Go dancing or some fun activity to have a date that's not just about food.

    Lol. If he understood that he wouldn't be complaining.

  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,232 Member
    oduca wrote: »
    Thanks guys!! I will keep that in mind next time we go out.

    I just feel so weak and give in to temptation when I see salty and sweet food, then I tend to over eat. It's easier for me not to see junk food, so I don't over eat. Is there a way to reduce my appetite? It's so hard keeping on track, I don't know... it's hard to explain. It's like I'm addicted to food when I see them.

    I eat my girlfriend's food because I feel bad that it's going to waste, and like I said I tend to over eat. You guys are right, I will try my best just to bring it home and eat it later on.

    When you eat food you don't want or need, just because it's there - it's still going to waste. It's just going through you first, and leaving deposits on its way through.
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    Find other activities for the two of you that are not focused on food.
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,724 Member
    oduca wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    oduca wrote: »
    Hi guy,

    I'm having a hard time dieting. I don't mind eating broccoli and chicken breast every single day, but my problem is my girlfriend, she always want to go to out. Often when we go out, we eat out. Also, when I buy her food she doesn't finish it so I often have to eat her food. Is there any tips would be very helpful.
    Lol, she's not forcing you to eat and she's not on your diet. So if you go out, share with her. You're eating what's left anyway.
    The other thing is DON'T go out so often. Learn to cook at home and have her do it too. Because if this is the person you intend to stay with, they BETTER know how to cook anyway.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png


    You are right, it's was my desicion to eat. No excuses. Now I need help not to overeat. I would eat my food and then my gf's leftovers. I will try to bring it home next.

    I just can't help not to overeat. Even though I know I'm full but for some reason I don't feel full when I see food, specially salt or spicy I tend to over eat untill I'm bloated. I hate this feeling. I have no self control. What should I do?

    Some options:

    Is each meal loaded with vegetables and water? This could help with keeping full

    Do you have items you love sprinkled throughout your diet? I find it helps with having a nice exciting meal or treat to look forward to. Then there's no need to go crazy because you see something nice - it's waiting for you soon enough

    You could also try just practicing "later". You're not necessarily saying no to what you want to eat. Just wait 10, 30 minutes, or an hour or two. Space it out around the day and maybe allow it to be your next meal

    Think up your own strategies and try to understand why you choose to eat this way each time. You may be best equipped to figure this out and come up with some solutions that may work for you
  • allenpriest
    allenpriest Posts: 1,102 Member
    edited January 2016
    RodaRose wrote: »
    Find other activities for the two of you that are not focused on food.

    Find a different girlfriend? :)


    Just a joke people
  • kiara1066
    kiara1066 Posts: 119 Member
    edited January 2016
    1. As others mentioned you don't have to eat chicken and broccoli everyday change things up.

    2. It's okay to eat out, but you don't have too if you don't want. Maybe schedule days to eat out and not going out some days. Find a plan with your girlfriend so both of your voices can be heard.

    3. As others mentioned you don't have to eat your girlfriends good. Get the food to go and it can be the next day's lunch for her, and if she doesn't want it you can eat it then. I always get some of my portions to go when I go out because it's not easy finishing the whole thing often when you eat in restaurants give out huge portions (at least it seems like that to me).

    4. Understand responsibility for what you eat your girlfriend is not ruining your diet. You choose to eat back her food it's a choice. You and your girlfriend need to communicate better have more dialogues tell her that you don't want to get out as much. Whoever I go out I find items that are lower in sodium, if it's a higher calorie item I might pick it. I would walk around or jump rope to help burn it. Or The next day I would eat not as much.
  • asyk805
    asyk805 Posts: 125 Member
    Have a date night in and cook a new healthy recipe together. We did this last week and it was nice. We even went to the meat market together and oogled all the different options before making our choice.
    He is currently sending me links to try on our next date night in.
  • successiswithinme
    successiswithinme Posts: 91 Member
    edited January 2016
    If your paying for her food and eating her leftovers then you should pick the places you eat that will help you make wise choices. If you two have regular eating places you attend then be proactive and do your menu homework to know what your healthiest choices are before you go there. Dont give her the power anymore to help you sabatoge yourself.
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
    oduca wrote: »
    Hi guy,

    I'm having a hard time dieting. I don't mind eating broccoli and chicken breast every single day, but my problem is my girlfriend, she always want to go to out. Often when we go out, we eat out. Also, when I buy her food she doesn't finish it so I often have to eat her food. Is there any tips would be very helpful.

    i eat out all the time and have lost 70 pounds.

    you do not have to finish her food. thats ridiculous.

    stop making excuses.
  • rybo
    rybo Posts: 5,424 Member
    Stop blaming her for your own shortcomings.
  • lisalsd1
    lisalsd1 Posts: 1,519 Member
    We have friends who ALWAYS split meals at restaurants. I don't know how they do it, b/c I usually eat more food than my husband. Also, find activities that don't revolve around food...going to the gym together would be an excellent test of the strength of the relationship.
  • choppie70
    choppie70 Posts: 544 Member
    When we go out to eat, I always ask for a take out box when I get my meal and put about 1/2 of the meal into the take out box so I don't eat it all. I felt a little awkward at first, but I don't really care!

    Also, you don't need to eat her food. That is a choice. Most restaurants are offering more healthy choices now. Do a little planning ahead and then "suggest" a place to eat when your girlfriend wants to eat out.