Bad relationship with food

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Where do I even start... I'm 27 years old, 275 pounds, and just had my first baby 3 months ago. My relationship with food has always been bad. I purposely don't pack a lunch for work so I "have to" go get fast food.
I get anxiety and super irritable when I can't eat what I want... I constantly think about food. Constantly. No, for real. I am literally ALWAYS thinking about where I'm going to go for my next meal. Or what I'm going to cook for dinner.
I want to change so bad. For me and for my son. I do not want him to grow up with my eating habits. I wonder if therapy could help me... Idk anymore. (Currently eating a burger while I type this... I'm super ashamed to admit that)
Any advise?? Preferably nothing mean please. I already feel terrible about myself and my choices...

Replies

  • melr01
    melr01 Posts: 70 Member
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    Don't feel alone. I am the same way with food. It is going to be a life long struggle. I would suggest therapy if that is an option. One thing I started doing is journaling. When I crave food or just want to eat a burger or something I write down what I want and why and how I think it will make me feel. Then if I choose to have that burger I will right down how I feel immediately after. How it felt to eat it and how I felt 5, 10, 15 minutes after. You could have a food addiction or you could be an emotional eater. There are so many reasons why you feel this way but at some point you need to stop and you need to do the things you don't want to do. It will suck. A lot. You will cheat (well I do) but slowly you will learn to identify with why you want those foods when you want it. It takes work to learn to manage it. Some days will be easier than others. Also plan. Plan your meals in advance so you don't have to think about food so often. Address your emotional issues with food if you have them. But be sure you are doing it for you as well as your son. Otherwise you will start hiding food and binge eating in a closet while he is sleeping or playing in the other room. Just my experience anyways.
  • esn222
    esn222 Posts: 24 Member
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    I LOVE FOOD TOO!!! I love to cook, I love to eat out - I totally get it!! My solution is to find things that taste awesome - then I don't want to stop for a burger and fries (as often). Make small steps. You WILL get there.
    melr01 wrote: »
    Don't feel alone. I am the same way with food. It is going to be a life long struggle. I would suggest therapy if that is an option. One thing I started doing is journaling. When I crave food or just want to eat a burger or something I write down what I want and why and how I think it will make me feel. Then if I choose to have that burger I will right down how I feel immediately after. How it felt to eat it and how I felt 5, 10, 15 minutes after. You could have a food addiction or you could be an emotional eater. There are so many reasons why you feel this way but at some point you need to stop and you need to do the things you don't want to do. It will suck. A lot. You will cheat (well I do) but slowly you will learn to identify with why you want those foods when you want it. It takes work to learn to manage it. Some days will be easier than others. Also plan. Plan your meals in advance so you don't have to think about food so often. Address your emotional issues with food if you have them. But be sure you are doing it for you as well as your son. Otherwise you will start hiding food and binge eating in a closet while he is sleeping or playing in the other room. Just my experience anyways.
    ^^ Best advice.
  • Melmo1988
    Melmo1988 Posts: 293 Member
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    I had to look at the username to double check I hadn't written this and forgot. This is exactly me. Especially about being irritable when you can't eat what you want. 100%. I wasn't like this before having kids, only after I lost 75lbs within the first year after having my first daughter. After losing the weight I started bingeing and I have gained it all back. Now I have two kids and I am working hard at losing it. I just keep reminding myself that I don't want to look back on my life and feel regret that I didn't change. Plus, I don't like myself and I am not happy with my life so something needs to change.
    One suggestion I have is to make a list of pros to changing your eating habits, and a list of pros to staying the way you are now.
  • Yi5hedr3
    Yi5hedr3 Posts: 2,696 Member
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    I believe Dr. Phil wrote a diet book, that might help you. Search for it on Amazon.
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
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    I find if I meal plan and pre log into MFP, I don't obsess as much. If everything is planned and ready to go, there isn't as much to think about. You may also want to journal your thoughts on your food after you eat it into the food notes or a separate journal. It may help you better discover what works for you. You can learn which foods make you feel bloated, or keep you full for longest or which ones will satisfy that carving with less calories.
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,442 Member
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    I have not been in your shoes, OP. I hope you find some terrific suggestions to help you cope with this. My suggestion would be to just log everything. Start there. Don't even worry about making changes at this point. Just log the things you are eating. My guess is once you see what you are really ingesting, it make motivate you to make changes. If it does, then make SMALL changes one at a time. Switch out one soda per day for water. Once you master that, make another SMALL change. It will take longer this way, but it will be sustainable and you will have a much better chance of success.

    Good luck!!!
  • coltsmama2015
    coltsmama2015 Posts: 6 Member
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    Thanks for the suggestions everyone! I probably should just track what I eat... Although it scares me to death. I bet I'm eating upwards of 4-5000 calories a day. (Because I eat fast food literally 6 days a week...) One thing I have done is switched to diet soda only... I know that's not good for me either, but its a start. I think I'm going to give therapy a try as well... What can it hurt?
  • lx3tx
    lx3tx Posts: 34 Member
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    I still think about food constantly. I will think about my next meal as I'm eating. I don't know if that's ever going to stop for me.

    I've been here closing in on two years. When I first started, I could have written your post. I loooooved (well still do) fast food. My favorite food of all time? A cheeseburger. I found I could still fit in fast food at the beginning and still have plenty of calories left over. After a while, I started switching to healthier food or at least bulking the not so healthy food with veggies so that I would feel satisfied once my calories dropped. I also remember clearly that the first month felt like torture because I was always hungry. My advice, and I don't know how helpful it will be to you, is to just stick with it. I don't find myself nearly as hungry as I did before. It gets so much easier! As far as eating fast food for lunch everyday, I've found that I have saved so much money by not eating it so much. Maybe that could be an incentive to you as well.
  • SoulOfRusalka
    SoulOfRusalka Posts: 1,201 Member
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    I would definitely suggest therapy. I've had an eating disorder and the symptoms were very much the same (always thinking about what I was going to eat next, when, getting anxious and upset when I couldn't have what I wanted or had planned...) and I think it would really help if you can afford it. Other than that, what people have said about journaling. If you can figure out what you're solving with food (anxiety, boredom, whatever) you could maybe try to find a replacement to reduce your dependence.
    Also, if you're going to binge, it might help to have a sort of procedure of things to do first-- like, wait 30 minutes, or read a chapter of a book, or listen to a song you like, or do something from your checklist for the day, whatever-- to distract yourself while you wait for the urge to subside, and promise yourself that you can eat at the end of that if you still really really want to. IDK. Good luck!