Serious question men...

AlanahBeez · February 2016

So on a scale of 1-10, how important is it in your opinion for your significant other to be in shape? Explain?
(This has never been a personal problem for me, But I know men are visual creatures and I'm just curious how much it actually matters, HONESTLY)

retrdartist · February 2016

I am not a man but ,,, the opinion you have of yourself is the most important..... if someone is concerned about how you LOOK,,,,, keep looking , girl.... If someone who cares about you is concerned for your health ,, that is another matter... set your standards on how you are going to let other people judge you....

Captain_Chao5 · February 2016

I'm a man (well I was last time I checked

) I think I can say (without offending the Wife) that visual shape is not important, to me anyway. I often tell her I love her whatever shape she is. The only thing I would worry about is if her health started to suffer. As long as she is healthy and happy, then she is entitled to be as slim or 'cuddly' as she likes. Who am I to judge?

JoshuaMcAllister · February 2016

Its always nice when the girl I'm dating is into healthy eating and is relatively sporty. That way we have a common hobby but on a scale of importance, I would put it low end. 5 or lower. If everything about them seems right, what should it matter if your significant other cant run a mile? I'll just have to run the mile with them on my back haha. That being said, if they eat takeaways every other night it probably wont work out.

Unknown · February 2016

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billbraskey · February 2016

I dont care how she looks but it would be nice to have her around for a while and i wouldnt want her to be sick or uncomfortable when she gets older

OrganicRider · February 2016

This right here. One thing I noticed is that as lost my weight and started exercising, the "house" seemed to have changed as well.

Now its just a matter of me maintaining my weight and keeping up with my cycling, weight training and yoga. The kids seem more active and definitely eat better since I have started shopping organic and cooking.

My wife eats somewhat better, you can tell when she goes shopping and when I go

She's 5'2" and 105lbs so no worries about overweight. I just worry about her overall health inside. I don't think she makes the best choices when it comes to eating, but I can't micro manage her life. If and when she is ready to eat better (cut back on sugar snacks), I'll be here to support

I think it makes it a little more challenging, but once you get into a routine and maintain it, you'll be great. I just wish she would/could accompany me on my rides, but we do other things together.

StencilChild · February 2016

It is important for the person I am with to be in shape. However, do not mistake that for being thin. I've dated tiny women, and large women. For me, pure aesthetics do not matter. I love to go camping and hiking. Having someone who can share that experience with me is essential. I'd rather be with a chubby woman who can keep up over a tiny woman who has to stop every 20 minutes to catch their breath!

AlanahBeez · February 2016

These are awesome answers and I love them!

I hate to go down this route.. But I'm also wondering as far as sexual attraction as well? I mean, doesn't it help to actually be attracted to the one your with??

msf74 · February 2016

It's very important to me mostly because of how it would affect our day to day lives with two active children.

Also, physical attraction is still an important part of our relationship and that would suffer if she wasn't in shape.

Incidentally she holds me to the same standards and I love her for it

FatMoojor · February 2016

Sexual attraction really isn't just down to how they look and probably stopped being a big thing the moment anyone stopped having one night stands where that was all you cared about.

How big or small someone is doesn't make them any less or more attractive. Sadly that view is something which is pushed on women from womens magazines which haven't bothered to ever speak to a bloke about this.

Doesn't matter if you have the body of a "goddess" if you are miserable, mean, bitchy etc then you are far less "attractive" than a "plus size" women who is kind, funny, etc.

Scamd83 · February 2016

There is quite a bit of importance in attraction, and I say that as someone who is slim but has a rather mundane face. More importantly from a health perspective I think it helps if someone thinks enough of themselves to be reasonably healthy because if they like themselves that much, others will like them too. Also depends on someone's attitude as well. I've perused various dating websites and been rather taken aback at some people who seem to demand the perfect physique from someone whilst not exactly being all that great a shape themselves. Practice what you preach basically, you want someone who's 'beach ready', better be beach ready yourself.

cwolfman13 · February 2016

To be in shape? 10. Note that I never said "skinny" or "thin" or whatever...I am not physically attracted to "skinny"...I am physically attracted to an athletic build and also to athletic ability among other things. Aesthetically, I like women with some muscle and being physically fit is important to me because most of my hobbies involve a pretty good deal of physical activity and I would obviously want to share those with my SO.

My wife and I frequently go on long bike rides as a date...we like to go running together...we like to participate in various cycling and running events together....we like hiking steep mountains with big packs on our backs and camping out for a week, etc, etc, etc.

If she wasn't physically fit, we wouldn't be able to do any of that together which means we wouldn't really have much in common. I've dated women who just want to sit around watching movies and whatnot, and it's boring as *kitten*.

StencilChild · February 2016

Of course physical attraction is important. Unless you meet someone over the internet...the appearance is the first thing you notice. But physical attraction and beauty is all in the eyes of the beholder. People who weigh 400lbs find love all the time. I'm not the best looking guy by any means, nor do I have the physique of a Greek god...but I have landed myself a few hotties in my day just by being myself. In the same token, I have talked to a few absolutely stunning women, and after 5 minutes of talking to them, I noticed that they really are just unattractive. Funny how that works.

Laurasparkle90 · February 2016

Not a man but just my two pennies worth

I used to be much thinner than I am now but I was also bulimic so miserable and had no confidence despite thinking I was in the best shape I'd ever been in. My partner has been with me from my biggest to my smallest and now inbetween, and he said he finds me most attractive in THAT way when I'm more confident and happy (and have a bigger bum ha!) So to sum up, not when I was my smallest.

WhoDeyMa · February 2016

*kitten*. Where are you guys all located and where isn't there any in my area? I've been a single mom for way too long.

cwolfman13 · February 2016

There is a lot that goes into attraction...I've dated women who were stunning on the surface...but underneath they were very shallow with little to no personality...kind of bitchy...not particularly smart, etc...yeah, they looked great, but ultimately I wasn't attracted for various other reasons.

Where attraction is concerned, there's a whole package of things that have to come together, including the physical. To that end, men are individuals are going to have individual preferences. I, for example, prefer an athletic, physical build...by best friend likes his women very small with no curves...another buddy of mine physically prefers women who are not too large but not too small and "fluffy" as he likes to call them...we're individuals with individual preferences.

jkal1979 · February 2016

I think she's looking more at having a common interest in health and fitness with a partner, not that she is being judged on her looks.

elaineamj · February 2016

My husband is the most amazing man on earth and the best husband to me. And yet, contrary to much popular thought that good husbands don't think this way, he has admitted to me that it is important to him. It's not a make or break type of thing (we had some honest discussions about that) - but it does matter to him.

That said, even though I love him madly, I could not consistently lose weight until I was ready for it myself. He's quietly thrilled

ChicagoCalifornian · February 2016

6.5 I want to have the attraction and also be able to do outdoor activities with me. Personality is more important to me though.

cwolfman13 · February 2016

Being in shape doesn't have so much to do with looks as it does physically being able to do certain things that require a particular level of fitness. It's possible to be physically fit and in shape, but also to be overweight.

msf74 · February 2016

I think for most people that sexual attraction is a key component in a relationship.

What being in shape does is simply increase the pool of potential partners (whoa, alliteration overload) that will find you attractive. Being out of shape is not a bar to finding someone who finds you sexually attractive of course as different people like different things but it does increase the odds of finding someone who is in to you.

It's what's on the inside which ultimately counts but I would prefer to make things easier for myself rather than harder.

OrganicRider · February 2016

Finding someone that you have things in common with helps A LOT in this area. I have a HUGE variety of "things I like to do" so its pretty easy to find things my wife can do with me. Exercising and cycling, I like to do with my friends. Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with my wife, but alone time or time with my friends is just as important to me.

Just as I have things in common with my wife, I find other things to have in common with my friends. When you have almost endless energy, its hard to find people that can keep up with you

ew_david · February 2016

There's more to attraction than looks.

_EPIC_ · February 2016

What shape are we talking about, when we say "in shape"

I mean round is a shape. Do you hate "round" ?

Oh. I see. Young people problems. Carrying on.

melindamaejones · February 2016

I am so far out of shape and know that my husband loves me regardless but I also know he wants me happy and healthy so I don't believe it's all about weight but I know it helps because when I notice changes in him from his hard labor job making his muscles grow quite rapidly I get happy for him so I can only think it is the same on the other end.

rankinsect · February 2016

Well, I would have some preference to athletic body types, but attraction is about far more than appearance. Appearance might be the first impression I have, but there's tons of room for attraction to grow or wither based on interactions.

azulvioleta6 · February 2016

Sure, because nobody is ever attracted to larger people....

jaycich · February 2016

Make 2 dating profiles, one of yourself, the other of an overweight girl. See how many messages you get and how many she gets. There's your answer.

rankinsect · February 2016

I think that only answers the question of initial attraction. Attraction isn't unchanging. I've met people I've initially found quite attractive and later completely reversed that opinion, and others that initially weren't attractive to me but we hit it off and I came to find them very attractive.

DWBalboa · February 2016

So my man card was renewed for yet another year, as if that was ever in question!

So I can’t speak for all men but I can speak for me. I have dated women of every shape and size from short to tall, thin to well let us just say not so thin. I personally have never put too much stock in a woman’s shape as much as I valued them for their inner beauty.

What can I say I just like women regardless of the shape, granted I like the curve ratio to be there but that in itself is not a showstopper for me. I just really like women that have like interest and values as mine. Did I mention that I just really like women?

To add; my wife is nowhere in as good of shape as I am and she well let us just say she is not in the same shape as when we first met but my love for her is stronger than ever as is my attraction to her. If one truly values the person than that is all that will ever matter.

Serious question men...

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