(VENT) Why do men have to look and lust ALL THE TIME?????

No matter how skinny/pretty I get I still feel sometimes like I'm never gonna be good enough to plz him. He is always adding other girls to his friend list on facebook. Their the type of girls that dont wear hardly anything. he only adds them to see hot pics when they post them. Is it wrong of me to feel this way? Are all men like this?
I have also confronted him about this yet he still does it and it really hurts my feelings!!!
He's telling me he doesnt care if i gain or lose he'll always love me and find me attractive yet he's only looking at these size 0 fake boob girls!!!!! :grumble: :brokenheart:

EVery man and woman looks at others. We are all designed to appreciate beauty. but a good man will bounce his eyes and respect his woman. I am sorry he is hurting you like this. It isn't right.

MOA that guy is not worth it!! He obviously does not respect you. Sure everyone looks but there is a difference between looking and disrespecting!

First of all...is this your boyfriend or your husband? If it is your boyfriend then you really need to think if this is the person that you want to be with. If this is your husband and you have told him how you feel and it doesn't seem to bother him then...there are some serious problems there and counseling may need to take place.

MOA that guy is not worth it!! He obviously does not respect you. Sure everyone looks but there is a difference between looking and disrespecting!

^Agree!

Dump him.

Yeah - my boyfriend says "kick him to the curb" and I agree. You are too good for him and apparently too tolerant. You don't deserve to put up with that. You are enough.

Hmmmm. If you're engaged to this dude, you better think twice. Men don't change if they don't want to change. He doesn't sound like he does want to change. If you let him watch porn, is it any different? Just saying. Good luck. Keep up the awesome work. Do it for you. Not cuz you want him to just look at you and no one else.

All men do look, but it depends on the level. My man does it sometimes, but never insultingly. Is he only looking at the girls pics on facebook, or is he talking to them too? If they are total strangers and he doesn't actually communicate with him, I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. But, if he's talking with them, that's another story. Also, my man doesn't spend a lot of time on the computer or wherever looking at these girls. He always puts me and the kids first. If your man is checking out those pics and ignoring you then it would definitely be something to talk to him about. Good luck

ummm...I usually don't chime in on these type of posts but after reading the responses, I felt I needed to!!!

yes, we have eyes, yes our eyes sometimes wanders..but it is a DISTINCT difference with walking down the street and looking at someone and someone on fb friending people. I am NOT the jealous type, I just don't deal with bull, never have, never will.

I would have a problem with that too! He needs to STOP doing it and respect your wishes. just my two cents

Do it for you. Not cuz you want him to just look at you and no one else.

If he isn't looking at "just you" now he isn't going to look at "just you" when you are "whatever" size.

I disagree that everyone looks.

My ex did the same thing. He knew it bothered me, but didn't care. There's a reason he's my ex. If he cannot respect you and your wishes, then is it really worth it?

My husband doesn't do anything like that, because he truly loves me and respects me. I don't feel the need to look at/for anyone else.

I am sincerely sorry he is choosing to hurt you. You deserve to be respected and loved, not made to feel like you are being compared to, and are less than other women.

I agree with Maryd4love. You two need to trust one another, and there are issues here that may need intervention.
Do you respond with anger or by telling him how it hurts you? Those are two very different reactions that will get very different interaction. It is a very sensitive topic, and you are not alone. I also am in agreement that your fitness should be for you first, because trying to form yourself to please another is unfulfilling and leads eventually to more stress as their expectations change. Been there. Done that. Also needed a counselor. It is nothing to be ashamed of. Men and women don't speak the same language most days. Keep trying to communicate but try other ways of getting your message through.

There are guys like that, however there are guys out there who don't droll over the sight of other women. My man is completly happy with me and I've never caught him checkin out how good another woman looks.

If he's truly happy with you and loves you then he'd respect you and stop sittin around gettin off on other women's pics.

Sure everyone looks however, you gotta ask yourself if that's all he does!!! Men I know that sit around checkin out and flirtin with other women end up cheating on their woman even thou they tell their woman how much they love them.

seems like a lot of man bashing is going on here recently... i find it comical and at times and it usually just comes off as girls insecurities about their insecure boyfriends/husband

I'm noticing that tonight too! I think we should link the threads!:laugh:

Personally? I don't think it's all about the guy, I think it has to do with both partners, insecurity on both sides! Self Esteem comes with learning to believe in who you are and that you ARE worth being treated well.

I don't think Men are pigs, I think there are some men and some Women in the world that simply aren't decent ppl. It's not all about the men, truth is? We teach others how to treat us with our self worth or lack of it!

Touche. Insecurity could be a factor. "Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering." -Yoda-

Not all men are like this, don't worry. Maybe it's time you re-think being with this guy? You deserve someone who only has eyes for you. :flowerforyou: Everyone does!

My husband has never checked out any other girl. I wish every girl had that kind of man. When women flirt with him, I just laugh lol. Bc he gets so embarrassed, and doesn't say anything except a little mumble of "Sorry.. I'm married." This man of yours definitely needs a little lesson. Maybe he doesn't understand how you're feeling? Really, make him sit down and listen. If he doesnt change and you want to stay, then counseling. If it's not worth it, then just leave. Best of luck.