Sick of being obese.

John, 55 years old and 297 pounds. Have done every program and plan you can think of and was contemplating Weight Watchers when I found MFP. I am at a time in my life where I need to stop quitting and start getting my butt in gear. I have been married 3 1/2 years to my beautiful wife who is 12 years my junior and am dad to her 2 teenage boys aged 19 and 16 (hate the term step kids so they are my sons). They love the gym but honestly my lack of following any sort of diet for more then 3-4 days at a time has led them to gain unneeded weight as well. I owe them more, and my wife her husband being around and active.

I will support any and all that support me, I also believe in paying it forward. I really need all the motivation I can get and will do the same for you.

Thanks for reading my long intro.

John
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Replies

  • mjinpgh
    mjinpgh Posts: 17 Member
    I hear ya. Just when i think i find something i lose all motivation. I have to start being accountable. That is what i am hoping the app and my Vivo help me do more than in the past. Good luck. Im on the road right next to you. :D
  • Ani2bfit
    Ani2bfit Posts: 95 Member
    You can do this!
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    mjpinvt wrote: »
    I hear ya. Just when i think i find something i lose all motivation. I have to start being accountable. That is what i am hoping the app and my Vivo help me do more than in the past. Good luck. Im on the road right next to you. :D

    I am the same way, after a couple of days I slip a little and use that as a license to pig out. No more, gotta stop. We can do this!!

  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    Ani2bfit wrote: »
    You can do this!

    Yes I can, THANK YOU!!!

  • hey john, thanks for sharing your story! I know the feeling about dropping the diet after some times since I also did it many times. But honestly, you don't have to seek motivation to be able to do it.. you just do it or don't.. motivation only goes so far, after the motivation is over, what you're left with is the WHY that made you first start it.. WHY do you want to lose weight? and pls don't answer me "it's because I want to be healthy", because that why is not powerful enough to keep you on track.. You need to find your REAL WHY.. is it because you want to be the example for your children? is it because you want to bang your wife real good (I don't mean to be desrespectiful, it's just men's conversation :D)? Just find your WHY and write it down somewhere you can see it everyday.. of course if your why is the second example I gave, then just write WHY real big in a paper so you can remember it! No one needs to know your WHY, only you.. of course you can share with whoever you want, and if that people can help you, great!

    and a side note.. it all only comes down to you, honestly. For example I have a friend that he's huge obese, he's never been that big, and he knows I train hard, he and his girlfriend came to me asking to train together and *kitten* but I can't help him if he can't help himself, and what I meant was "if you don't have the will, you'll not last"..

    Well sorry for the long post, but I hope I helped you in any way

    Best regards,
    Felipe
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    hey john, thanks for sharing your story! I know the feeling about dropping the diet after some times since I also did it many times. But honestly, you don't have to seek motivation to be able to do it.. you just do it or don't.. motivation only goes so far, after the motivation is over, what you're left with is the WHY that made you first start it.. WHY do you want to lose weight? and pls don't answer me "it's because I want to be healthy", because that why is not powerful enough to keep you on track.. You need to find your REAL WHY.. is it because you want to be the example for your children? is it because you want to bang your wife real good (I don't mean to be desrespectiful, it's just men's conversation :D)? Just find your WHY and write it down somewhere you can see it everyday.. of course if your why is the second example I gave, then just write WHY real big in a paper so you can remember it! No one needs to know your WHY, only you.. of course you can share with whoever you want, and if that people can help you, great!

    and a side note.. it all only comes down to you, honestly. For example I have a friend that he's huge obese, he's never been that big, and he knows I train hard, he and his girlfriend came to me asking to train together and *kitten* but I can't help him if he can't help himself, and what I meant was "if you don't have the will, you'll not last"..

    Well sorry for the long post, but I hope I helped you in any way

    Best regards,
    Felipe

    Felipe, your post did help. I guess that never having a defined "why" has been the reason for so many failures in my past.

    My why, I want to be alive to grow old with my wife and see my boys have children and be a grandfather that can play with his grandkids and not just sit and watch. I couldn't do that today, but I will be able to in the future.

    And I took no offense to your post at all, I am as big a realist as can be. No need to sugar coat anything with me.

    Thanks!!
  • airangel59
    airangel59 Posts: 1,887 Member
    Welcome John....set small goals, one day, one step, one pound at a time. Forget the past, each day is a new day. String a few days together and things will add up. You are worth it, the journey is worth it.
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    airangel59 wrote: »
    Welcome John....set small goals, one day, one step, one pound at a time. Forget the past, each day is a new day. String a few days together and things will add up. You are worth it, the journey is worth it.

    Thank you so much!!

  • RazingOrange
    RazingOrange Posts: 1 Member
    Hey John,

    I Started tracking my calories 6 weeks ago. At 5'9" 240 lbs, I decided to make a change... I'm down to 224 and so far, so good.
    It's not easy, but it's not impossible either. I track everything I eat without falter. Iv'e turned it in to somewhat of a game. It's become almost fun to figure out my meals and track carbs, protein, and fat.
    Occasionally I'll screw up and eat 100-200 calories over what I'm supposed to, but then I remember how I used to eat four slices of pizza, a cheese steak and french fries without a drop of remorse...
    I'm taking it day by day and I think that's good advise..

    Good luck and keep at it,
    Ryan
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    Hey John,

    I Started tracking my calories 6 weeks ago. At 5'9" 240 lbs, I decided to make a change... I'm down to 224 and so far, so good.
    It's not easy, but it's not impossible either. I track everything I eat without falter. Iv'e turned it in to somewhat of a game. It's become almost fun to figure out my meals and track carbs, protein, and fat.
    Occasionally I'll screw up and eat 100-200 calories over what I'm supposed to, but then I remember how I used to eat four slices of pizza, a cheese steak and french fries without a drop of remorse...
    I'm taking it day by day and I think that's good advise..

    Good luck and keep at it,
    Ryan

    Day by day, that is great advice!

    Thank you Ryan!!

  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    Can someone tell my how to add friends here, I have no clue.
  • airangel59
    airangel59 Posts: 1,887 Member
    John, been in your shoes...joined WW more times than I can count...yo yo dieter...lost and regained it all and more. I found MFP right after got diagnosed with Type 2 (June 2012), I'm on day #1353. Hit my goal & have maintained my loss for about a year.
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    airangel59 wrote: »
    John, been in your shoes...joined WW more times than I can count...yo yo dieter...lost and regained it all and more. I found MFP right after got diagnosed with Type 2 (June 2012), I'm on day #1353. Hit my goal & have maintained my loss for about a year.

    That is outstanding, day #1353 is quite an accomplishment!!

  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
    Starting this accountability app. is the best thing in starting to live a healthy life John. I am on day 80, but my husband is on day 280 something.... I stopped because my sons were here visiting and life happens!

    To add people just click on the picture, then it shows some options. Click on their name and then you will go to their profile. Just click "add friend". They will get a notice saying you have asked.

    Remember losing weight isn't the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to losing weight. Be patient, and if you bite it, you write it. Not being truthful in the logging only hurts you, so be vigilant. I usually log my food after lunch, so then I can see how much I have left for dinner. I make a printout and then cross off what I have eaten and was is planned for dinner. This helps me stay on target.

    This is a great journey, and is empowering. Nothing feels as good as getting healthy feels. I also did other programs, but this one is different, because its MINE. I am the leader here, and I choose what I wish to eat, and do.
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    Annr wrote: »
    Starting this accountability app. is the best thing in starting to live a healthy life John. I am on day 80, but my husband is on day 280 something.... I stopped because my sons were here visiting and life happens!

    To add people just click on the picture, then it shows some options. Click on their name and then you will go to their profile. Just click "add friend". They will get a notice saying you have asked.

    Remember losing weight isn't the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to losing weight. Be patient, and if you bite it, you write it. Not being truthful in the logging only hurts you, so be vigilant. I usually log my food after lunch, so then I can see how much I have left for dinner. I make a printout and then cross off what I have eaten and was is planned for dinner. This helps me stay on target.

    This is a great journey, and is empowering. Nothing feels as good as getting healthy feels. I also did other programs, but this one is different, because its MINE. I am the leader here, and I choose what I wish to eat, and do.


    Thank you for the words of wisdom and the great advice, it is very much appreciated. I started logging 30 some odd days ago, but not with 100% accuracy. That all stops now.
  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
    I have an index card pile of great sayings, and words of wisdom. I figure I need to "re-program" my brain so this is the last time I will lose these lbs! I go thru the pile every week, my food for thought.

    The Most important ingredient in food preparation is my MOOD.

    Maybe the journey isn't so much about becoming anything. Maybe it's unbecoming everything that isn't you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.

    I gain weight because my head makes food decisions that ignore what my body wants.

    (ok there are some for YOUR index card pile. :-) You're welcome. I am old and wise so words of wisdom spew out of my brain all the time. hahaha.
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    Annr wrote: »
    I have an index card pile of great sayings, and words of wisdom. I figure I need to "re-program" my brain so this is the last time I will lose these lbs! I go thru the pile every week, my food for thought.

    The Most important ingredient in food preparation is my MOOD.

    Maybe the journey isn't so much about becoming anything. Maybe it's unbecoming everything that isn't you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.

    I gain weight because my head makes food decisions that ignore what my body wants.

    (ok there are some for YOUR index card pile. :-) You're welcome. I am old and wise so words of wisdom spew out of my brain all the time. hahaha.

    I love it, thank you!!

    One of the favorites of mine is one a friend just gave me. Sick of starting over? Stop giving up!!

  • sharondjs
    sharondjs Posts: 676 Member
    Annr wrote: »
    Starting this accountability app. is the best thing in starting to live a healthy life John. I am on day 80, but my husband is on day 280 something.... I stopped because my sons were here visiting and life happens!

    To add people just click on the picture, then it shows some options. Click on their name and then you will go to their profile. Just click "add friend". They will get a notice saying you have asked.

    Remember losing weight isn't the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to losing weight. Be patient, and if you bite it, you write it. Not being truthful in the logging only hurts you, so be vigilant. I usually log my food after lunch, so then I can see how much I have left for dinner. I make a printout and then cross off what I have eaten and was is planned for dinner. This helps me stay on target.

    This is a great journey, and is empowering. Nothing feels as good as getting healthy feels. I also did other programs, but this one is different, because its MINE. I am the leader here, and I choose what I wish to eat, and do.

    great advice :)
  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
    yep, sound advice.

    Take pleasure in persevering, that's what separates those who keep pushing forward from those who throw in the towel.

    I don't wish for this journey to be my "one of many" tried and failed attempts. I will get it right this go around.
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    Annr wrote: »
    yep, sound advice.

    Take pleasure in persevering, that's what separates those who keep pushing forward from those who throw in the towel.

    I don't wish for this journey to be my "one of many" tried and failed attempts. I will get it right this go around.

    Yes you will, we both will!
  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
    I read this once and copied it down. I have to read it a couple of times to understand what it is saying. but when I really read what its stating, its powerful.

    Weight loss is always accompanied by other inner changes because excess weight accumulation is only the END PRODUCT of in-congruent food attitudes, eating patterns and digestive processes. It's not the removal of weight so much as changing these processes that is your goal.
  • shadowconn
    shadowconn Posts: 141 Member
    MPF has been an amazing success for me. I had never really had much of a weight problem until 5-6 years ago. In fact, I tend to be underweight, but for whatever reason, I started packing on pounds like it was going out of style and NOTHING worked to stop it or get rid of it. Not even going to the gym 8-9 times a week (Yes I really was going twice a day at one point) And I ended up FAT/FIT and I was Angry. It was a body style that I happen to loathe with every fiber of my being.

    So I stopped going to the gym. Cancelled the gym membership and went home. Did nothing for like 2 years. Went from 180 to 225. In May, my oh-so-kind mother told me I was fat. Yeah . . . that's family for ya. It took me a bit more to actually get on a scale, but when I did, I realized I was gonna die in short order if I didn't make a change.

    Since going to a gym, exercising and eating "correctly" or according to a specific diet don't work for me, I had to do something different. So I logged in and started the portion control thing. I eat whatever I want, and I mean that. I will not eat a carrot stick if I want a candy bar. And it does me no good to even try. I'm just better off eating the candy bar because there's a good chance I'm going to dunk those carrot sticks in ranch, eat half a bag along with the ranch and still eat the candy or 2 or 3 at that point. So . . portion control it is.

    I've been here almost 200 days . . . I've lost 53 pounds, I am slightly less than 2 pounds from reaching my healthy weight range, and at 171, I am 9 pounds lighter than when I was going to the gym multiple times a day.
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    Annr wrote: »
    I read this once and copied it down. I have to read it a couple of times to understand what it is saying. but when I really read what its stating, its powerful.

    Weight loss is always accompanied by other inner changes because excess weight accumulation is only the END PRODUCT of in-congruent food attitudes, eating patterns and digestive processes. It's not the removal of weight so much as changing these processes that is your goal.

    Awesome, totally awesome quote!!

  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    shadowconn wrote: »
    MPF has been an amazing success for me. I had never really had much of a weight problem until 5-6 years ago. In fact, I tend to be underweight, but for whatever reason, I started packing on pounds like it was going out of style and NOTHING worked to stop it or get rid of it. Not even going to the gym 8-9 times a week (Yes I really was going twice a day at one point) And I ended up FAT/FIT and I was Angry. It was a body style that I happen to loathe with every fiber of my being.

    So I stopped going to the gym. Cancelled the gym membership and went home. Did nothing for like 2 years. Went from 180 to 225. In May, my oh-so-kind mother told me I was fat. Yeah . . . that's family for ya. It took me a bit more to actually get on a scale, but when I did, I realized I was gonna die in short order if I didn't make a change.

    Since going to a gym, exercising and eating "correctly" or according to a specific diet don't work for me, I had to do something different. So I logged in and started the portion control thing. I eat whatever I want, and I mean that. I will not eat a carrot stick if I want a candy bar. And it does me no good to even try. I'm just better off eating the candy bar because there's a good chance I'm going to dunk those carrot sticks in ranch, eat half a bag along with the ranch and still eat the candy or 2 or 3 at that point. So . . portion control it is.

    I've been here almost 200 days . . . I've lost 53 pounds, I am slightly less than 2 pounds from reaching my healthy weight range, and at 171, I am 9 pounds lighter than when I was going to the gym multiple times a day.

    53 pounds down, that is awesome. Congratulations!! I will remember the carrot stick story, I am the same way as you. I've tried deprivation, portion control sounds so much better. Thanks for that advice, appreciate it!!
  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
    I know right? Its a mind game. Change your mind, attitude, change your body. If only it was that easy. I try to eat "clean" no processed foods and chemically processed items. I have a 17 yr old son so I don't expect him to eat the way I do, nor my husband. So I do the "I am a line cook" thing. This is my journey not theirs. I am eating what I want to eat, not trying to convince them to eat my food.
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    Annr wrote: »
    I know right? Its a mind game. Change your mind, attitude, change your body. If only it was that easy. I try to eat "clean" no processed foods and chemically processed items. I have a 17 yr old son so I don't expect him to eat the way I do, nor my husband. So I do the "I am a line cook" thing. This is my journey not theirs. I am eating what I want to eat, not trying to convince them to eat my food.

    Mind game is right, just have to get mine right. My boys want to eat healthy, so does my wife. They are from Mexico and love fruits and veggies with small portions of meat and fish. Because of me, they increased their portions of meat, added more fast foods and crap honestly. They will eat healthy and I will too. It is good for all of us.
  • mjinpgh
    mjinpgh Posts: 17 Member
    Annr wrote: »
    yep, sound advice.

    Take pleasure in persevering, that's what separates those who keep pushing forward from those who throw in the towel.

    I don't wish for this journey to be my "one of many" tried and failed attempts. I will get it right this go around.

    Exactly. Im so tired of failing at this.
  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
    Oh that is great that you have a united front, in your family. The Navy killed my husbands' taste buds years ago, but he has no problem with me eating first, then fixing his. He is patient.
  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    Annr wrote: »
    Oh that is great that you have a united front, in your family. The Navy killed my husbands' taste buds years ago, but he has no problem with me eating first, then fixing his. He is patient.

    He sounds like a good man.

  • Johnnielow
    Johnnielow Posts: 35 Member
    mjpinvt wrote: »
    Annr wrote: »
    yep, sound advice.

    Take pleasure in persevering, that's what separates those who keep pushing forward from those who throw in the towel.

    I don't wish for this journey to be my "one of many" tried and failed attempts. I will get it right this go around.

    Exactly. Im so tired of failing at this.


    Failure is not an option!!!