Getting So Frustrated... Just Wanna Cry

kirstinlee
kirstinlee Posts: 152 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I've been losing and gaining the same couple pounds for the last month and I'm about to lose my mind. It's like no matter what I do, I cannot break the 20 lb mark.

I'm 5'7.5", 178.8-180.2 depending on the day, and work an active job. I average around 12,000 steps a day, plus crouching, reaching, bending, lifting, and the like.
On a normal day, I eat about 1300-1400 calories (I log everything) and drink around half a gallon of water. My BMR is in the 1600's, and according to my fitbit I'm burning in the ballpark of 2,500-2,800 cals a day.

And yet I lose nothing. My clothes don't feel any different. I don't look any different in progress pictures.

I know five people are going to post that flow chart, and I'm not even here for that... I know no one has any magic answers me. I'm just frustrated. Any tips would be nice, but othersise, thanks for letting me vent <3
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Replies

  • shinycrazy
    shinycrazy Posts: 1,081 Member
    Maybe check your sodium? Could be making you hold onto water.
  • vivmom2014
    vivmom2014 Posts: 1,647 Member
    I don't know about fitbits but I don't trust them, and I don't want one. My MIL's says she burns 1500 calories taking a walk (under an hour.) ~apologies to people who love their fitbits~
  • lgregory6540
    lgregory6540 Posts: 63 Member
    I'm with you and I'm only at the beginning of my weight loss. It is literally like waiting for a pot of water to boil. No words of wisdom just wanted to let u know there are others ready to bang their head against a wall too.
  • malibu927
    malibu927 Posts: 17,565 Member
    If you've seen the flowchart, then you know what to do. If you aren't losing, you're eating more than you think and need to tighten up your logging.
  • vczK2t
    vczK2t Posts: 309 Member
    i weigh myself once a month. and i am learning that the # on the scale isn't the best measure of success. for me, it's how active i can be in a day. can i walk up stairs without huffing and puffing? then i am getting healthier
  • stealthq
    stealthq Posts: 4,298 Member
    Other than double checking that your logging is tight, which I have a feeling you've already done, there's nothing much to do save be patient for now.

    If you're doing as you say, then you've probably gotten to the point where loss has slowed and water/waste retention masks it easily, which sucks. It's possible you're going to start seeing scale movement in a series of fits and starts rather than more consistently - it's what happened to me and several others on the forums once we got closer to goal.
  • kirstinlee
    kirstinlee Posts: 152 Member
    I meal prep and weigh everything, so I know how much I'm eating. That's what's so frustrating. I'm eating the same exact thing now as I was two months ago, and everything just came to a screeching halt. The first dress size and eighteen pounds came off the first month -- and now nothing.
  • kirstinlee
    kirstinlee Posts: 152 Member
    vivmom2014 wrote: »
    I don't know about fitbits but I don't trust them, and I don't want one. My MIL's says she burns 1500 calories taking a walk (under an hour.) ~apologies to people who love their fitbits~

    Yeah, I take mine with a grain of salt. I use it more for steps and sleep logging, but it seems to usually be in the ballpark of accurate... On my days off, I usually barely crack 2,100... Which seems about right given my BMR.
  • malibu927
    malibu927 Posts: 17,565 Member
    I looked back two weeks in your diary and saw several days where you didn't log dinner and one or two that had nothing logged at all. I would start there and log everything you eat, weighing what you can at home. Consistency is key to doing this.
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,442 Member
    edited February 2016
    I looked at your diary, and I know you don't want to hear it, but you need to fix your logging. You didn't log dinner 4 days of the two weeks I checked, and one day you only logged breakfast.

    50 grams of rice is a quarter-cup. A quarter-cup is like a ping-pong ball. Are you truly eating that little?

    Do you use a food scale?
  • revolucia78
    revolucia78 Posts: 196 Member
    edited February 2016
    kirstinlee wrote: »
    I meal prep and weigh everything, so I know how much I'm eating. That's what's so frustrating. I'm eating the same exact thing now as I was two months ago, and everything just came to a screeching halt. The first dress size and eighteen pounds came off the first month -- and now nothing.

    Have you adjusted the number of calories from when you started? It's usually advised to reduce them again after every 10lb loss because your body now requires less energy that it did before. If not, I would try that and see if that helps. Good luck and 20lbs is great! Even though you're at a standstill you're not gaining so don't give up!


    Edit to include: I would make sure you are logging everything first to get a truly accurate picture of your calories and then adjust from there based on the results after a couple weeks.
  • tawanda6329
    tawanda6329 Posts: 139 Member
    If I were you, I would up my calories to 1,600 and see what happens. I find that if I eat below my BMR, I will not lose weight. So, I try to eat right at or a little above my BMR.
  • jmann1100
    jmann1100 Posts: 14 Member
    OK. I'm new here. Tell me about the flow chart.
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,442 Member
    edited February 2016
    I went to scoobysworkshop.com and calculated your TDEE (as sedentary. ETA: I forgot about your step count. Oops, sorry). It looks like this:

    4az9ud1sd9mr.jpg

    If you are truly weighing and logging everything (which I suspect you're not, due to only having breakfast logged on Sunday), then maybe you are eating too little. I have never, ever said that to anyone and I truly believe you need to tighten up your weighing and logging. You should be around 1700 calories per day.

    I am 5'9", 177 pounds, 41 years old next week, and am losing steadily (although slowly) on 1930 calories a week.
  • bendis2007
    bendis2007 Posts: 82 Member
    Are you doing any activity besides being active at work? I don't think the fit bit is correct in the amount of calories you are burning daily. If you are doing the same thing everyday - like walking at the same pace - your heart and muscles have since adapted to that change and are more efficient at the movement pattern. That efficiency will translate into some calories being burned but most likely not the level the fit bit is stating. Adding something to your routine that actually challenges the muscles (lifting heavier weights, intermittent HIIT like jumping jacks, sprinting) and forces greater oxygen consumption will help to increase your TDEE and help you get over the hump. Also, if there's a stall and you haven't had blood work in awhile then you can rule out endocrine/hormonal issues with your doctor that may be giving you an overall lower metabolic starting point.
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,442 Member
    jmann1100 wrote: »
    OK. I'm new here. Tell me about the flow chart.

    This is it.

    94u6tjqbta21.jpg
  • malibu927
    malibu927 Posts: 17,565 Member
    jmann1100 wrote: »
    OK. I'm new here. Tell me about the flow chart.

    Last year @lemonlionheart created a flow chart that has the basic questions and answers many of us longtime members will ask people who say they aren't losing weight. You'll see it in nearly every post like this.
  • Vortex88
    Vortex88 Posts: 60 Member
    edited February 2016
    Something isn't adding up here. Some points:

    1) you almost definitely aren't burning 2500-2800 calories per day as an active 5'7" woman. Its more likely to be 1800-2200 maximum

    2) you are most likely under-recording calories through no fault of your own. I see this time and time again. I had lunch with a friend recently we both track macros. We ate the same thing and he asked me how I recorded it. I put approx 800 cals and he put 400!! He was waaaaaaay off and I showed him why (I have been tracking macros for 3 years and he has been doing it about 3 months)

    3) are you tracking not only what you eat but every single thing that goes in your mouth? all drinks, sauces, condiments - they all count and the calories add up fast

    4) how much protein are you eating? At 178lbs you need a minimum of 120g of protein. If not, you are probably simply eating too much carbs and fat to lose weight - macro ratios make a huge difference and never listen to anyone who says they don't

    5) stress seems to cause fat retention. Stress = cortisol. Cortisol cause absolutely cause people to retain fat so try as best you can to relax about this

    6) if you really are recording everything accurately (which I suspect isn't the case through no fault of your own), then I suggest you increase calories slowly and gradually (over a few weeks) up to 2000 and then slowly and gradually (over a few weeks) bring them back down. This should stimulate the metabolism and kickstart the weightloss.

    7) VERY IMPORTANT: it might seem paradoxical but you have to like your body, even a little bit, as it is now in order for it be be okay for it to change. Just try every day giving your body a little liking, a little love, a little appreciation. It's the best, most incredible thing you will ever own and if you don't appreciate it, it will often "push back" against your weight loss goals. I know this is the least scientific thing you have ever heard lol but the "science" of weightloss is actually still in the dark ages (despite the recent upsurge in fat loss studies and the much-improved quality of those studies now), relatively speaking, and this point about self-love is very real.

    "The firm but kind mindset is the effective one"

    "You cannot hate your way to a positive outcome"

    Good luck
  • jmann1100
    jmann1100 Posts: 14 Member
    Oh wow! Thanks
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,442 Member
    Vortex88 wrote: »
    Something isn't adding up here. Some points:

    1) you almost definitely aren't burning 2500-2800 calories per day as an active 5"7 woman. Its more likely to be 1800-2200 maximum

    2) you are most likely under-recording calories through no fault of your own. I see this time and time again. I had lunch with a friend recently we both track macros. We ate the same thing and he asked me how I recorded it. I put approx 800 cals and he put 400!! He was waaaaaaay off and I showed him why (I have been tracking macros for 3 years and he has been doing it about 3 months)

    3) are you tracking not only what you eat but every single thing that goes in your mouth? all drinks, sauces, condiments - they all count and the calories add up fast

    4) how much protein are you eating? At 178lbs you need a minimum of 120g of protein. If not, you are probably simply eating too much carbs and fat to lose weight - macro ratios make a huge difference and never listen to anyone who says they don't

    5) stress seems to cause fat retention. Stress = cortisol. Cortisol cause absolutely cause people to retain fat so try as best you can to relax about this

    6) if you really are recording everything accurately (which I suspect isn't the case through no fault of your own), then I suggest you increase calories slowly and gradually (over a few weeks) up to 2000 and then slowly and gradually (over a few weeks) bring them back down. This should stimulate the metabolism and kickstart the weightloss.

    7) VERY IMPORTANT: it might seem paradoxical but you have to like your body, even a little bit, as it is now in order for it be be okay for it to change. Just try every day giving your body a little liking, a little love, a little appreciation. It's the best, most incredible thing you will ever own and if you don't appreciate it, it will often "push back" against your weight loss goals. I know this is the least scientific thing you have ever heard lol but the "science" of weightloss is actually still in the dark ages (despite the recent upsurge in fat loss studies and the much-improved quality of those studies now), relatively speaking, and this point about self-love is very real.

    "The firm but kind mindset is the effective one"

    "You cannot hate your way to a positive outcome"

    Good luck

    Well, you were good through #3, anyway...

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