I want to give up
Replies
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I've thought about giving up also but after weighing in today I lost 1 pound and Ive been doing this dieting thing for at least a month now. This small accomplishments make me still strive. Don't give up after 2days that's no time. Keep trying and make sure you log everything you eat and when you see on the graph your weight change you will be so happy you didn't give up!0
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Bry_Lander wrote: »Bry_Lander wrote: »Are you looking to actually get fit or for instant gratification? These are mutually exclusive
Not very supportive and actually condescending to a newbie. Someone frustrated after two days might just need a few words of encouragement. Or, they might see your message and give up. Your mindset is completely different than a person just starting out. It might do you good to remember that.
I respond to candid advice, I don't place any value on sugar coating and coddling; maybe the OP does as well, if not, maybe she likes your responses better. When you ask for advice on a message board, you invite all opinions, from all different viewpoints.
By all means, express your viewpoint, give your knowledge to someone who might use it. However, you're looking at a person on the edge, who is in the bad mental circle of self hate, we eat for comfort, gain weight and hate ourselves for it. To lose it looks quite overwhelming.
Your need to not sugar coat may work for you but what in your mind makes you think a person in this bad mindset is going to respond to it? That's ignorant and VERY condescending. As was your response to me. Shows me you CAN'T put yourself into that mindset of someone starting out so go share your knowledge with someone on the other end of the weight loss spectrum. It's not helpful here.0 -
Bry_Lander wrote: »Are you looking to actually get fit or for instant gratification? These are mutually exclusive
Not very supportive and actually condescending to a newbie. Someone frustrated after two days might just need a few words of encouragement. Or, they might see your message and give up. Your mindset is completely different than a person just starting out. It might do you good to remember that.
I don' t actually know or interact with the person you quoted, but there's so much "poor baby" therapy on MFP that people forget it isn't the only way.
If that post makes her quit she isn't ready. I have a lot of hope for the OP because she asked for advice on what she's doing "wrong" instead of "please give me motivation."
OP, you might not be doing anything wrong. Give it a couple of weeks, read some of these, and stick it out. If you still want to quit, try increasing your calories instead. Even a half pound of weight loss a week will get you to your goal eventually.0 -
Bry_Lander wrote: »Bry_Lander wrote: »Are you looking to actually get fit or for instant gratification? These are mutually exclusive
Not very supportive and actually condescending to a newbie. Someone frustrated after two days might just need a few words of encouragement. Or, they might see your message and give up. Your mindset is completely different than a person just starting out. It might do you good to remember that.
I respond to candid advice, I don't place any value on sugar coating and coddling; maybe the OP does as well, if not, maybe she likes your responses better. When you ask for advice on a message board, you invite all opinions, from all different viewpoints.
By all means, express your viewpoint, give your knowledge to someone who might use it. However, you're looking at a person on the edge, who is in the bad mental circle of self hate, we eat for comfort, gain weight and hate ourselves for it. To lose it looks quite overwhelming.
Your need to not sugar coat may work for you but what in your mind makes you think a person in this bad mindset is going to respond to it? That's ignorant and VERY condescending. As was your response to me. Shows me you CAN'T put yourself into that mindset of someone starting out so go share your knowledge with someone on the other end of the weight loss spectrum. It's not helpful here.
It is very ignorant and condescending to think we must all approach life in conformance to your philosophy .
I have worked with hundreds of people over the years to help them lose weight through initiatives in a corporate wellness environment, and my approach has been very well received. Most of the people who need help exist in an environment surrounded by enablers who just want to make them feel better in their current state of unhealthiness, they certainly don't need more people joining that crowd.
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Two days and ready to quit along with a user name that implies you were ready to quit before you even started.... if you think you can't do it you're correct. However I'm pretty sure with an attitude change you'd have a lot more success. The thing is you have to decide if you're willing to commit to it or not. Maybe it isn't your time yet, but you've taken the first step and started so how about giving it a chance?0
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Bry_Lander wrote: »Bry_Lander wrote: »Are you looking to actually get fit or for instant gratification? These are mutually exclusive
Not very supportive and actually condescending to a newbie. Someone frustrated after two days might just need a few words of encouragement. Or, they might see your message and give up. Your mindset is completely different than a person just starting out. It might do you good to remember that.
I respond to candid advice, I don't place any value on sugar coating and coddling; maybe the OP does as well, if not, maybe she likes your responses better. When you ask for advice on a message board, you invite all opinions, from all different viewpoints.
By all means, express your viewpoint, give your knowledge to someone who might use it. However, you're looking at a person on the edge, who is in the bad mental circle of self hate, we eat for comfort, gain weight and hate ourselves for it. To lose it looks quite overwhelming.
Your need to not sugar coat may work for you but what in your mind makes you think a person in this bad mindset is going to respond to it? That's ignorant and VERY condescending. As was your response to me. Shows me you CAN'T put yourself into that mindset of someone starting out so go share your knowledge with someone on the other end of the weight loss spectrum. It's not helpful here.
How are you able to judge OP's mental state with a two-sentence original post? How do you know OP is on the edge? In the bad mental circle of self hate? Eating for comfort? Because I read they had been at it for two days and had gained weight.0 -
Hey, do not give up. We are all here to support you.. I love junk food, especially cakes, cookies and donuts. I was a cop for 20 years. (lol) After I watched the series on TLC, 600 lb life, I closely looked in the mirror and realized I had a weight problem. I am hooked on that show and it inspires me to continue with this diet. As of today, I lost 30 lbs. If I can do it, I know you can too. It is all in the mind and keeping yourself busy doing something will help your cravings.
Eventually, your body will tell you when to eat and your stomach will adjust. The weight will start coming off in a matter of weeks.
Good luck and I am rooting for you.
Dean0 -
Bry_Lander wrote: »Bry_Lander wrote: »Are you looking to actually get fit or for instant gratification? These are mutually exclusive
Not very supportive and actually condescending to a newbie. Someone frustrated after two days might just need a few words of encouragement. Or, they might see your message and give up. Your mindset is completely different than a person just starting out. It might do you good to remember that.
I respond to candid advice, I don't place any value on sugar coating and coddling; maybe the OP does as well, if not, maybe she likes your responses better. When you ask for advice on a message board, you invite all opinions, from all different viewpoints.
By all means, express your viewpoint, give your knowledge to someone who might use it. However, you're looking at a person on the edge, who is in the bad mental circle of self hate, we eat for comfort, gain weight and hate ourselves for it. To lose it looks quite overwhelming.
Your need to not sugar coat may work for you but what in your mind makes you think a person in this bad mindset is going to respond to it? That's ignorant and VERY condescending. As was your response to me. Shows me you CAN'T put yourself into that mindset of someone starting out so go share your knowledge with someone on the other end of the weight loss spectrum. It's not helpful here.
Too much conjecturing here.
And why all the talk about "mindsets" and how the poster you've so vehemently reacted to "CAN'T" put himself into the mindset of someone starting out? It starts to read like a bunch of gibberish...
The fact is: getting & staying fit is a completely different endeavor than seeking instant gratification. Even if the truth hurts, it is still ultimately freeing.
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Bry_Lander wrote: »Bry_Lander wrote: »Are you looking to actually get fit or for instant gratification? These are mutually exclusive
Not very supportive and actually condescending to a newbie. Someone frustrated after two days might just need a few words of encouragement. Or, they might see your message and give up. Your mindset is completely different than a person just starting out. It might do you good to remember that.
I respond to candid advice, I don't place any value on sugar coating and coddling; maybe the OP does as well, if not, maybe she likes your responses better. When you ask for advice on a message board, you invite all opinions, from all different viewpoints.
By all means, express your viewpoint, give your knowledge to someone who might use it. However, you're looking at a person on the edge, who is in the bad mental circle of self hate, we eat for comfort, gain weight and hate ourselves for it. To lose it looks quite overwhelming.
Your need to not sugar coat may work for you but what in your mind makes you think a person in this bad mindset is going to respond to it? That's ignorant and VERY condescending. As was your response to me. Shows me you CAN'T put yourself into that mindset of someone starting out so go share your knowledge with someone on the other end of the weight loss spectrum. It's not helpful here.
That's a really big stretch in to what the OPs mental state is.
OP, when I started again this last time, I wasn't really ready, but I knew I wanted something different from where I was. I decided to just start logging each day. No pressure. The good, the bad, the ugly. It all went in there. As I tracked, I noticed patterns in hunger and satiety based on my balance of foods. Proteins, fats, veggies. I also noticed differences in energy levels when I consumed enough (1200 calories was miserable for me). I also knew from past experience that working out helped me make more healthful choices in my foods. I wanted to fuel my workouts. I also didn't want to feel like I was on a diet. Increasing my calories, and ensuring that I had a treat when I wanted one, helped in making these changes more manageable.
We don't have a lot of information to go off of, based on what you have given us. How many calories are you eating each day (are you trying to be too aggressive, this can make you miserable)? Are you using a food scale (weighing is much more accurate)? Did you start a new workout routine (this can create water retention, so the scale says you've gained when it's really just extra water)? How much are you trying to lose (is your goal too aggressive)? Are you close to TOM (again, water retention)? Did you weigh at the same time each day (I find that I am 3-4lbs heavier at night)? Did you weigh on the same scale (different scales can be significantly different)?
Take some measurements and some pictures as well. I can tell you that when I look in the mirror, I do not think I look 46lbs lighter, but when I compare pictures from start to now, there is a very obvious difference. The scale lies to us, our eyes are deceptive to us. Having additional metrics will be valuable.
@notready520
ETA: Any time the scale shows this big of a jump, I assume water weight. Your weight will fluctuate daily, but if it's from TOM, it will be back down in a week. If it's from too much sodium yesterday, it will be back down in a few days. If it's from a new workout routine, it may take several weeks. Keep at it and trust the process. Have some more patience though. It works, it just takes time.0 -
You may definitely need to steer clear of the scale. At least until you've been at this for awhile (i.e. a month or so). The scale tends to make me feel discouraged (although, not lately
) so I don't do much more than once a month. You have to give yourself a fair chance, and in this instance, that means giving yourself more time to adjust. If you're eating at a deficit, you will see results. Be patient and keep going. 0 -
On top of being more patient, your user name is telling me the state of mind you're currently in...
Exactely my thoughts!! Change your name and your attitude. Be nice to yourself and stay positive. Your metabolism needs a kickstart before you can lose weight, so make sure you drink drink drink water/tea, no soda, not even the dietones and walk!! it will give your system loads of oxygen which will start your metabolism. Check Pinterest and make a few albums with interesting pictures, rolemodels, good healthy food and ideas that inspire you. Losing weight for us fat people is loads of work and if youre not in for that, it aint happening. Good luck, shoulders straight, head up and forget the scale this week, we all know its tempting, but so demotivating as well!0 -
Don't give up!
When I first started out, I actually gained 4 lbs my first two days as well simply because I was not eating enough calories according to my TDEE. I've stuck with it and lost 36 pounds so far. Two days is nothing. To make sure you're eating the correct calories (honestly I found the ones on myfitnesspal too low for me), use this calculator. http://www.iifym.com/tdee-calculator/ And remember, you aren't going to see fast results your first two days. Try two weeks, or heck, even two months! 0 -
Bry_Lander wrote: »Bry_Lander wrote: »Are you looking to actually get fit or for instant gratification? These are mutually exclusive
Not very supportive and actually condescending to a newbie. Someone frustrated after two days might just need a few words of encouragement. Or, they might see your message and give up. Your mindset is completely different than a person just starting out. It might do you good to remember that.
I respond to candid advice, I don't place any value on sugar coating and coddling; maybe the OP does as well, if not, maybe she likes your responses better. When you ask for advice on a message board, you invite all opinions, from all different viewpoints.
By all means, express your viewpoint, give your knowledge to someone who might use it. However, you're looking at a person on the edge, who is in the bad mental circle of self hate, we eat for comfort, gain weight and hate ourselves for it. To lose it looks quite overwhelming.
Your need to not sugar coat may work for you but what in your mind makes you think a person in this bad mindset is going to respond to it? That's ignorant and VERY condescending. As was your response to me. Shows me you CAN'T put yourself into that mindset of someone starting out so go share your knowledge with someone on the other end of the weight loss spectrum. It's not helpful here.
Jesus wept...... I think you're projecting a lot of your own issues onto the OP. You know nothing about her or how she took Bry's post.
A bit of tough love sometimes really doesn't go amiss here and constant mollycoddling and "don't you worry my love... there there..." might also not be terribly helpful in the long run.0 -
Bry_Lander wrote:It is very ignorant and condescending to think we must all approach life in conformance to your philosophy .
I have worked with hundreds of people over the years to help them lose weight through initiatives in a corporate wellness environment, and my approach has been very well received. Most of the people who need help exist in an environment surrounded by enablers who just want to make them feel better in their current state of unhealthiness, they certainly don't need more people joining that crowd.
I'm not asking you to conform to my philosophy, its not even a philosophy. I am telling you, as someone who was and still is overweight, your condescension to a person who is JUST STARTING OUT is ignorant.
I've noticed a LOT of physical trainers on this site who want to give their opinion. You may have experience with weight loss and you may understand the physicality of losing weight. It does not mean you understand the mindset of someone who was 130lbs overweight as I was. Therefore, my opinion is that you don't belong here unless you start with someone at the beginning.
The original poster had a name of 'not ready'. Does that sound like someone that needs to hear something along the lines of put up or shut up? On Day 2? That's what you did to that person. You belittled someone who is already low. Sometimes people are here to be coddled. Sometimes they just need a 'I've been there and know what you feel'. Sometimes a 'either do it or don't do it' is what that person needs.
In this case, you were way off base.
And, it is completely annoying to have a skinny healthy person tell someone who is overweight, unhappy and struggling to just go do it. Its akin to a person holding a baby telling an infertile person how great motherhood is. Tacky, rude and condescending.
You don't like my response? Great. I don't like yours. I don't think you know what its like to be overweight and discouraged. I don't think you care either...."just get up and lose that weight and shut up. I have experience and know what I'm doing" (therefore implying that others don't). That's what I hear from you. It is ignorance and 'not ready' may have already jumped ship and I lay that at the door of people like you that 'think' they know better and love to tell everyone how much you know. I hope 'not ready' will remain here, keep trying and get better advice from someone else.-1 -
Lot of fat people became skinny-healthy people on here. Some of them maybe want to help #justsayin0
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Bry_Lander wrote:It is very ignorant and condescending to think we must all approach life in conformance to your philosophy .
I have worked with hundreds of people over the years to help them lose weight through initiatives in a corporate wellness environment, and my approach has been very well received. Most of the people who need help exist in an environment surrounded by enablers who just want to make them feel better in their current state of unhealthiness, they certainly don't need more people joining that crowd.
I'm not asking you to conform to my philosophy, its not even a philosophy. I am telling you, as someone who was and still is overweight, your condescension to a person who is JUST STARTING OUT is ignorant.
I've noticed a LOT of physical trainers on this site who want to give their opinion. You may have experience with weight loss and you may understand the physicality of losing weight. It does not mean you understand the mindset of someone who was 130lbs overweight as I was. Therefore, my opinion is that you don't belong here unless you start with someone at the beginning.
The original poster had a name of 'not ready'. Does that sound like someone that needs to hear something along the lines of put up or shut up? On Day 2? That's what you did to that person. You belittled someone who is already low. Sometimes people are here to be coddled. Sometimes they just need a 'I've been there and know what you feel'. Sometimes a 'either do it or don't do it' is what that person needs.
In this case, you were way off base.
And, it is completely annoying to have a skinny healthy person tell someone who is overweight, unhappy and struggling to just go do it. Its akin to a person holding a baby telling an infertile person how great motherhood is. Tacky, rude and condescending.
You don't like my response? Great. I don't like yours. I don't think you know what its like to be overweight and discouraged. I don't think you care either...."just get up and lose that weight and shut up. I have experience and know what I'm doing" (therefore implying that others don't). That's what I hear from you. It is ignorance and 'not ready' may have already jumped ship and I lay that at the door of people like you that 'think' they know better and love to tell everyone how much you know. I hope 'not ready' will remain here, keep trying and get better advice from someone else.
You are reading an awful lot into "Are you looking to actually get fit or for instant gratification? These are mutually exclusive." It might be time to back away from the forums.0 -
OP has not been around since he/she posted this thread. I wonder did he/she give up as it says in the profile name "notready520"...0
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I've noticed a LOT of physical trainers on this site who want to give their opinion. You may have experience with weight loss and you may understand the physicality of losing weight. It does not mean you understand the mindset of someone who was 130lbs overweight as I was. Therefore, my opinion is that you don't belong here unless you start with someone at the beginning.
A lot of folks on here started off very obese and lost the weight and became fit and active people. Just because they are fit/active now and posting torso shots of their fit selves does not mean they were not obese at one time and did not struggle.0 -
bry_lander wrote:It is very ignorant and condescending to think we must all approach life in conformance to your philosophy .
I have worked with hundreds of people over the years to help them lose weight through initiatives in a corporate wellness environment, and my approach has been very well received. Most of the people who need help exist in an environment surrounded by enablers who just want to make them feel better in their current state of unhealthiness, they certainly don't need more people joining that crowd.
I'm not asking you to conform to my philosophy, its not even a philosophy. I am telling you, as someone who was and still is overweight, your condescension to a person who is JUST STARTING OUT is ignorant.
I've noticed a LOT of physical trainers on this site who want to give their opinion. You may have experience with weight loss and you may understand the physicality of losing weight. It does not mean you understand the mindset of someone who was 130lbs overweight as I was. Therefore, my opinion is that you don't belong here unless you start with someone at the beginning.
The original poster had a name of 'not ready'. Does that sound like someone that needs to hear something along the lines of put up or shut up? On Day 2? That's what you did to that person. You belittled someone who is already low. Sometimes people are here to be coddled. Sometimes they just need a 'I've been there and know what you feel'. Sometimes a 'either do it or don't do it' is what that person needs.
In this case, you were way off base.
And, it is completely annoying to have a skinny healthy person tell someone who is overweight, unhappy and struggling to just go do it. Its akin to a person holding a baby telling an infertile person how great motherhood is. Tacky, rude and condescending.
You don't like my response? Great. I don't like yours. I don't think you know what its like to be overweight and discouraged. I don't think you care either...."just get up and lose that weight and shut up. I have experience and know what I'm doing" (therefore implying that others don't). That's what I hear from you. It is ignorance and 'not ready' may have already jumped ship and I lay that at the door of people like you that 'think' they know better and love to tell everyone how much you know. I hope 'not ready' will remain here, keep trying and get better advice from someone else.
I lost over 100lbs with this app. Took four years, but I did it. But please, do say more about how I and others who have lost weight here don't know what it's like to be overweight and discouraged.0 -
I'm not asking you to conform to my philosophy, its not even a philosophy. I am telling you, as someone who was and still is overweight, your condescension to a person who is JUST STARTING OUT is ignorant.
I've noticed a LOT of physical trainers on this site who want to give their opinion. You may have experience with weight loss and you may understand the physicality of losing weight. It does not mean you understand the mindset of someone who was 130lbs overweight as I was. Therefore, my opinion is that you don't belong here unless you start with someone at the beginning.
The original poster had a name of 'not ready'. Does that sound like someone that needs to hear something along the lines of put up or shut up? On Day 2? That's what you did to that person. You belittled someone who is already low. Sometimes people are here to be coddled. Sometimes they just need a 'I've been there and know what you feel'. Sometimes a 'either do it or don't do it' is what that person needs.
In this case, you were way off base.
And, it is completely annoying to have a skinny healthy person tell someone who is overweight, unhappy and struggling to just go do it. Its akin to a person holding a baby telling an infertile person how great motherhood is. Tacky, rude and condescending.
You don't like my response? Great. I don't like yours. I don't think you know what its like to be overweight and discouraged. I don't think you care either...."just get up and lose that weight and shut up. I have experience and know what I'm doing" (therefore implying that others don't). That's what I hear from you. It is ignorance and 'not ready' may have already jumped ship and I lay that at the door of people like you that 'think' they know better and love to tell everyone how much you know. I hope 'not ready' will remain here, keep trying and get better advice from someone else.
You are really personalizing this! The OP has not provided enough information for you to say that her struggle is exactly the same as yours. You don't know what will motivate or derail her. Unless you have been chatting with her privately, you don't know. She hasn't given this information. She hasn't even given enough for us to really be able to provide solutions for what she is struggling with, because we don't know what her struggles are right now. I'm not sure why you feel so personally slighted here, and I am sorry for that, but your really seem to be taking on more than you need to here.0 -
It must be Friday. 0
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It is very ignorant and condescending to think we must all approach life in conformance to your philosophy .
I'm not asking you to conform to my philosophy, its not even a philosophy. I am telling you, as someone who was and still is overweight, your condescension to a person who is JUST STARTING OUT is ignorant.
I've noticed a LOT of physical trainers on this site who want to give their opinion. You may have experience with weight loss and you may understand the physicality of losing weight. It does not mean you understand the mindset of someone who was 130lbs overweight as I was. Therefore, my opinion is that you don't belong here unless you start with someone at the beginning.
The original poster had a name of 'not ready'. Does that sound like someone that needs to hear something along the lines of put up or shut up? On Day 2? That's what you did to that person. You belittled someone who is already low. Sometimes people are here to be coddled. Sometimes they just need a 'I've been there and know what you feel'. Sometimes a 'either do it or don't do it' is what that person needs.
In this case, you were way off base.
And, it is completely annoying to have a skinny healthy person tell someone who is overweight, unhappy and struggling to just go do it. Its akin to a person holding a baby telling an infertile person how great motherhood is. Tacky, rude and condescending.
You don't like my response? Great. I don't like yours. I don't think you know what its like to be overweight and discouraged. I don't think you care either...."just get up and lose that weight and shut up. I have experience and know what I'm doing" (therefore implying that others don't). That's what I hear from you. It is ignorance and 'not ready' may have already jumped ship and I lay that at the door of people like you that 'think' they know better and love to tell everyone how much you know. I hope 'not ready' will remain here, keep trying and get better advice from someone else.
I firmly believe attitudes like this, and the other posts you have made on this thread are unsupportive and perpetuate obesity.
Dear OP
Be patient, put away your scale, accept that scale weight is a fluctuating range and stick at it. Or stay fat. Those are your only options.
If you want todo this you need to fix your attitude and commitment first ...be ready ..nobody else will do this for you ..it's all your decision0 -
Give up? After two days?? How will that help? If you get a flat tire, do you go around and slash the other 3 tires and give up? No, you fix the flat and keep going! if you don't know how to fix the flat, you learn!
You don't see magic in the weight loss department in two days. Changes need to be made, new habits learned, mindset needs to change, and all this takes time.
So be in it for the long haul, educate yourself on how to do it the right way, make the changes you can stick with so the weight loss and fitness sticks for GOOD.
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geminigarcia199017 wrote: »notready520 wrote: »I have been doing this dieting thing for two days and like a fool I weighted myself this morning. According to the scale I have gained 6 pounds. Please someone tell me what I am doing wrong.
Not enough time for your body to make enough changes in two days.Heck I been struggling for two months & not even thinking about giving up.What is your deadline for your weight lost goal,there has to be a starting date & finishing date. My starting date is January 1st 2016 - December 25th 2016,I know that it will take around 12 months to see changes. U need a deadline with any goal.
Weight loss needs a reasonable deadline, if at all. Sometimes life happens and we stray off track. Other times our body fights us (injuries or medical issues). Personally I think setting too stringent of a deadline can be more hurtful. Realistic expectations are an important component along with patience.0 -
What you're doing wrong is getting on the scale after two days. Put the scale away, don't get on it for, oh try 2 or 3 weeks. Keep logging, weigh your food and move your body, even if it's just to park as far as you can at the store to get in some extra steps. Drink enough water. Remind yourself that you didn't put on the extra weight in two days. Being overweight is hard, losing weight is hard, choose your hard. Slow and steady wins the race, now get on it and don't give up!0
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OP--if you're still around. I hope you won't give up. Read the startout stickies,as suggested, and make sure you're doing it right. You don't want to spin your wheels. Then be consistent and patient. One thing that really helped me (and still does) is to take your measurements weekly and keep a log of them with the date. When the scale wasn't moving I'd go to my journal and see those inches lost and it was always a great picker upper. Do your best for a month. If you still have no progress, come back with more info, and we'll be happy to help you. Best of luck.0
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ROFL, notice how this whole thread went banana's, and the initial poster has not even responded ... must be having a good laugh0
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Bry_Lander wrote:It is very ignorant and condescending to think we must all approach life in conformance to your philosophy .
I have worked with hundreds of people over the years to help them lose weight through initiatives in a corporate wellness environment, and my approach has been very well received. Most of the people who need help exist in an environment surrounded by enablers who just want to make them feel better in their current state of unhealthiness, they certainly don't need more people joining that crowd.
I'm not asking you to conform to my philosophy, its not even a philosophy. I am telling you, as someone who was and still is overweight, your condescension to a person who is JUST STARTING OUT is ignorant.
I've noticed a LOT of physical trainers on this site who want to give their opinion. You may have experience with weight loss and you may understand the physicality of losing weight. It does not mean you understand the mindset of someone who was 130lbs overweight as I was. Therefore, my opinion is that you don't belong here unless you start with someone at the beginning.
The original poster had a name of 'not ready'. Does that sound like someone that needs to hear something along the lines of put up or shut up? On Day 2? That's what you did to that person. You belittled someone who is already low. Sometimes people are here to be coddled. Sometimes they just need a 'I've been there and know what you feel'. Sometimes a 'either do it or don't do it' is what that person needs.
In this case, you were way off base.
And, it is completely annoying to have a skinny healthy person tell someone who is overweight, unhappy and struggling to just go do it. Its akin to a person holding a baby telling an infertile person how great motherhood is. Tacky, rude and condescending.
You don't like my response? Great. I don't like yours. I don't think you know what its like to be overweight and discouraged. I don't think you care either...."just get up and lose that weight and shut up. I have experience and know what I'm doing" (therefore implying that others don't). That's what I hear from you. It is ignorance and 'not ready' may have already jumped ship and I lay that at the door of people like you that 'think' they know better and love to tell everyone how much you know. I hope 'not ready' will remain here, keep trying and get better advice from someone else.
Sorry, but I have to agree that you are overreacting big time. The OP's are sometimes motivated by different styles. If you don't believe me, look up the now famous "mean people" thread. You will be surprised. I have been very heartened by at least 6 new posters that have come on board since the beginning of the year. They all said they like MFP because there's real information, they want--the truth-- as soon as possible, so they can get on with their weight loss. I hope that you too are successful on here, but you can't project your frustrations on the OP, and take her place.0
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