When is it no longer "baby weight" TO YOU?

Swimgoddess · June 2011

Parents ONLY please.

When is being a new mom no longer an excuse? Moms, how long did you plan to give yourself to get back to normal without feeling guilt? How long did it actually take you? What is your weight "history" during childbearing years thus far? Guys, how long of a "grace period" do you give before broaching the subject tactfully if needed?

As for me, I definitely DO NOT think I could have handled postpartum weight loss the way I have without the military. They give you 6 months to get under a BMI of 25. BUT, there is a huge financial incentive to fit all your uniforms by the time you get off maternity leave (6 weeks; new uniforms are $$$$). I managed to lose all but the last 5lbs by 6 weeks post-partum with the first two; it probably wasn't the safest method considering I began calorie restriction while still in the hospital, nursing and resumed working out at the 3 week mark. With the third I was a bit more lax, no exercise really but I was back to my prepregnancy weight by 9 weeks. History is as follows:

Prepregnancy #1: 142lbs
Gain: 55lbs (eek!)
Return to Prepreg Weight: 8 weeks

Prepregnancy #2: 148lbs
Gain: 23lbs (I learned my lesson!)
Return to Prepreg Weight: 7 weeks

PreTTC #3: 147lbs (I had to stop Adderal for 4 months)
Prepregnancy #3: 164lbs
Gain: 30lbs
Return to Prepreg Weight: 9 weeks
Return to PreTTC Weight: still working on it 15 months later

Here's pics from the 3rd pregnancy; 1st is at 38 weeks pregnant, 2nd is at 9 weeks postpartum:

My hubby said he'd give me a full year with this last one since I was officially a civilian, he thinks that's about how long other "normal" guys give their wives. I think women generally give each other up to two years in some cases (in the sense that it isn't gossip-worthy if a mom offers baby weight in conversation as an explanation for something.)

What does everyone else think? What standard do you hold yourself or your significant other to?

TinaS88 · June 2011

I'd say a year, but it all depends on how much weight you gain. Your belly looks pretty small... mine toward the end was HUGE... lol.. and for good reason, my son ended up being 9lbs 10 oz and almost 22 in. long!

katiejneely · June 2011

Wow, your pic looks fantastic! I'm still working on the LAST 5 of my "pre baby" weight--4 years and 2 kids later. :-) ALMOST there!!!!!

zeeeb · June 2011

jeez, i wish i could have a body like that after 3 kids.

i've had 2 kids and my youngest is nearly 5, and i'm close to getting back to Pre preg weight, yeah, i let myself go badly, and 2 c/s left me with a lovely stomach (NOT) and some wonderful stretch marks.

I put on 20kg with both pregnancies, and lost 10kg almost straight away afterwards, but the remaining 20kg stayed on and on with me until i could barley fit into a size 18 jeans and decided that enough was enough.

I wish i hadn't let myself go, it would have been much easier on me to just have controlled my diet and exercise during pregnancy but i stopped going walking because I use to have to go to the toilet every 15 minutes and had to plan my route to go past public toilets, hotels and so forth in order to not wet myself.

kellyscomeback · June 2011

After 9m I said I was just fat. I gained 26 lbs with my DD and after breast feeding stopped I packed it all back on. I'm now working on trying to surpass my pre preggo weight.

Heatherbelle_87 · June 2011

He would "give you a year" please note if any guy said that to me he'd earn one hell of a smack and cold shoulder for the next week!

Anywho, 12-24 months is a realistic goal but that depends on your pre-pregnancy fitness level, fitness level while pregnant, delivery type, number of pregnancies and type (s) of delivery.

abbigail_r · June 2011

I think for each person its different and for every baby you need to add time. With my first I lost the weight within 3 and a half months. With the second I lost it about the same. I was also young. With the 3rd it was harder to find time as well as my boby just didnt bounce back. With the last one it took wayyyy longer. I nursed longer and it just wouldnt fall off even when I tried super hard. This past April after about 3 mths of trying really hard and only seeing about 4 lbs fall off, it has finally started dropping and I am not trying so hard. He is 21 mths old.

SarahofTwins · June 2011

Well since I had twins back in January I was at post pardum around 185-183...after 5 months Im down to 136. So Im hoping another 15-20 more pounds.

zml_mom · June 2011

I was 162 at my first dr appt with my 22 month old and I was 249 the day he was born, I gained a **** load of weight. I had a ruptured disc in my lower back that prevented me from pretty much doing anything. I got down to 217 in 8 weeks then had back injections and stuff
then got pregnant with my now 7 month old so started at 217 with him and I was 270 the day he was born,
it is now 7 1/2 months later and I am 186. I have lost a total of 84 lbs in 7 months.
my goal is 160 (pre-pregnancy weight) by my sons first birthday in November.

I think it depends on how much you gain and other circumstances on how long is still considered baby weight.
I mean I still have baby flab but I probably always will even after I finish loosing weight

kynichol21 · June 2011

I am giving myself a whole year and I have 3 months left. I was 177 lbs pre-pregnancy. I only gained 13lbs making me 190lbs because they said I was too overweight to only gain between 11-20lbs. I dropped down to 174lbs a week after I had my daughter. I then keep gaining and losing while I was nursing and have finally starting losing the weight. Although I am under my pre-pregnancy weight I have a bigger belly then before I got pregnant.

Swimgoddess · June 2011

for good reason, my son ended up being 9lbs 10 oz and almost 22 in. long!

I'd say so! Hehe. My babies weights were 7lbs 9oz, 6lbs 13oz and 6lbs 7oz. All between 19"-21". High altitude pregnancies result in slightly smaller babies and larger placentas due to O2 (here in Denver) which explains my youngest.

Oh, all three were V-birth; I totally get C-section mommies get extra time.

Rjerumbo · June 2011

As a guy I would have to say it's more about the effort that you're putting into getting your body back than it is the amount of time it's taking. If you give yourself a time frame, it gives you an excuse to keep putting it off, at least that's how I work. If you're eating right and exercising the weight will come off, it's that simple. So stick with it, it sounds like you're making awesome progress to be where you are at 9 weeks postpartum!

rhapsody527 · June 2011

WELL, my best friend's mom says you have 18 years to take off the baby weight, because you only start losing once the kids are out of your house! Lol.

I'm a believer in the "9 months on, 9 months off" rule. I didn't gain too much with either of my pregnancies (15 lbs with the first, 20 lbs with the second) because I was pretty sick in the beginning and lost weight. I was back to my pre pregnancy weight within 3 months or so. I think for each subsequent child it takes a little longer.

msmandyjo · June 2011

With my first, I was also in the MIL. I lost most the weight pretty quickly since my command PT'd like CRAZY, but my body was definitely different, as my hips had widened. I stayed 5-8 lbs over until I got preggers w/ DS. DD is now 3 1/2

With Baby #2, I was in my pre pregnancy jeans w/ in the first few months, but it started to sneak back on w/o me realizing it. I now weigh as much as I did when I delivered, which is why I'm here. DS is 16 months, and about 25 of the pounds just jumped on me when he weaned at 14 months. He was a BIG nurser, and quit cold turkey, from 6x daily to none, so I think that might play a role. My goal weight is 5 lbs lower than where I was before I got preggers the first time, to give me a little something extra to shoot for.

BUT, I'm here for me. Not for my husband. He loves me no matter what size, and even though I feel like a cow, he thinks I'm sexy as hell, can't keep his hands to himself. He was the same way when I was a size 2 as well.... And, even if he didn't and he tried to "give" me a time frame to get my body back, I'd give him a foot in the *kitten*.

grace173 · June 2011

They say it takes 40 weeks to make a baby and that you should give AT LEAST that to get back to your post pregnancy weight.

Heatherbelle_87 · June 2011

for good reason, my son ended up being 9lbs 10 oz and almost 22 in. long!

I'd say so! Hehe. My babies weights were 7lbs 9oz, 6lbs 13oz and 6lbs 7oz. All between 19"-21". High altitude pregnancies result in slightly smaller babies and larger placentas due to O2 (here in Denver) which explains my youngest.

Oh, all three were V-birth; I totally get C-section mommies get extra time.

Lol yes and No! I was pregnant in Colorado Springs (not much lower then you and some parts are actually higher) and I had an 8lbs 13ozs 21 inches long boy! I was induced the day after my due date (controversial I technically should have gone an extra week for my true due date, I measured big so My OB refused to change it despite my initally frustration, but Im not objecting anymore!) My OB wanted to let me go till 43 weeks, she was glad I didnt when we delivered by c-section he would have been 10 lbs atleast by the following week 11-14 by 43 weeks! and I had placenta previa, 2 accidents while pregnant then we found a knot in the umbilical cord that had one of his main veins 80% blocked so at the end he wasnt even getting full nutrient flow! I wasnt gestationally diabetic either. He was the largest baby born that day

mamacremers · June 2011

My hubby said he'd give me a full year with this last one since I was officially a civilian, he thinks that's about how long other "normal" guys give their wives. I think women generally give each other up to two years in some cases (in the sense that it isn't gossip-worthy if a mom offers baby weight in conversation as an explanation for something.)

What do you mean he's **giving** you a year? That doesn't sound very supportive. You gave him three beautiful babies!!! My husband never talked about the weight i gained/lost with my pregnancies! Here's how things went when I was preggo. With my second, I had gestational diabetes, so I think i gained like a pound in my last 3 months.

baby #1: ppw 165, gained 22, returned to ppw in 2 weeks and I gained it all back by the end of my 6 week leave.
baby #2: ppw 185, gained 26 (I think, I didn't even pay attention), lost it in two weeks and went back to 207 by the end of my 8 week leave.

I gained it all back because I was nursing and I had a hefty appetite/couldn't stop eating like I was pregnant and I didn't watch what I was eating and went nuts. Especially with my second, I ate all I couldn't those last few months those first few weeks

Baby #2 was 9 months old when I got tired of being heavy and decided to lose the weight. I am now down to the weight I was when I was 21. and I hope to be down to a bit over high school graduation weight when I decide I'm done.

If you really want a timeline, I think most women say a year after the baby is born to lose the weight. Just work at it and you'll lose it. It looks like you're doing pretty good so far.

tannaleigh · June 2011

Considering I haven't been this low in weight since my first pregnancy I'd say it took me 5 years LOL. I never got back down after my second son. I lived with him off and on in a children's hopsital until he got a heart transplant just shy of his 1st bday. my health was my last priority. My son is almost 4.5 months now and I lost all of the weight I gained with him (60lbs) plus everything from the two previous pregnancies.... I still have a ways to go until I am happy with my body again, but I am so proud to be able to say I am back to prepregnancy weight..... heading to my high school weight!

mamacremers · June 2011

I'd say a year, but it all depends on how much weight you gain. Your belly looks pretty small... mine toward the end was HUGE... lol.. and for good reason, my son ended up being 9lbs 10 oz and almost 22 in. long!

I was a tank too by the end of my pregnancy with my son. He was 9 lbs, 3 oz and 22 inches.

nelsy26 · June 2011

i think a year is a great target to lose all the baby weight...way to go mama you look great!!!!!!!!!

Harrar10 · June 2011

I Just had my first baby 12 weeks ago and I gained 56 lbs during my pregnancy, I am currently 4 lbs away from my pre-pregnancy weight of 175 lbs. I also think it's ridiculous that he said he would "give you a year" Maybe you should have a talk with him because he isn't supportive, sounds judgmental, and he thinks thats what it takes "civilians". I was in the Army for 3 years and think its ridiculous that he thinks so foul of "civilians" It has nothing to do with being a civilian or being military it has to do with how much time and effort you put into losing the baby weight. I have been working out and dieting since 4weeks PP from a C-section!

hello_kyla · June 2011

I had a C-section so couldn't do anything for 6 weeks after baby. Then, my thyroid went so I was gaining weight. And you know what? My husband didn't say anything even when I was 10 pounds heavier than when I was 38 weeks pregnant.

I am still about 25 heavier than pre-preggo at 6 months post. I don't really care how much I take off as long as I fit back into my work clothes by September.

Harrar10 · June 2011

I had a C-section so couldn't do anything for 6 weeks after baby. Then, my thyroid went so I was gaining weight. And you know what? My husband didn't say anything even when I was 10 pounds heavier than when I was 38 weeks pregnant. I am still about 25 heavier than pre-preggo at 6 months post. I don't really care how much I take off as long as I fit back into my work clothes by September.

I hear ya, I actually started walking at 4 weeks after my c-section at 2.5mph for 40 minutes. I also have Hypothyroidism so my thyroid has been messed up since I can remember so weight gain and loss is super hard for me.

breskittle · June 2011

I think it's important for women to stay healthy during their pregnancy.
I only gained 10 lbs of "baby weight" post pregnancy and lost that almost immediately and I am a single first time mother.

Unfortunately most women use pregnancy as an excuse to let themselves go.
You shouldn't have such an issue with losing weight if you had been watching what you were eating the whole time.
Your baby does not eat twice as much as you. It doesn't even need a quarter of what you would normally eat.

As far as time to lose the baby weight - I think 6 months to a year. And a year to be gracious.
Depends on if you actually had any complications during and after your pregnancy.

Swimgoddess · June 2011

Ok, this thread is about what it means TO YOU. It's different for everyone. My hubby and I are sitting here snickering (ok, honestly I'm laying on the bed as he's leaning over my shoulder reading while dry humping my leg distractingly) at the responses saying he's mean or childish for giving a deadline. It really wasn't a hard and fast ultimatum or anything. I knew that FOR ME it wouldn't take that long. Heck, I only ended up needing 9 weeks, so for him knowing me and the way I am, it's more than generous

Like another man shrugging and saying he didn't care if his wife took 10 years. This wasn't a vent for hubby-bashing support; it was "this is how we view this, how do you view your OWN situation?" He loves where I'm at now. I only weaned 2 months ago (did almost 14 months this time, yea!) and was finally cleared to start Adderal again so I can finally work on getting to my preTTC weight. Got my body fat down to just inside "athlete" level, so I'm probably going to have to compromise on what the scale might say.

Thanks to the guys out there brave enough to share and cheers to all of our mommy poster's inner MILFs

Harrar10 · June 2011

Ok, this thread is about what it means TO YOU. It's different for everyone. My hubby and I are sitting here snickering (ok, honestly I'm laying on the bed as he's leaning over my shoulder reading while dry humping my leg distractingly) at the responses saying he's mean or childish for giving a deadline. It really wasn't a hard and fast ultimatum or anything. I knew that FOR ME it wouldn't take that long. Heck, I only ended up needing 9 weeks, so for him knowing me and the way I am, it's more than generous Like another man shrugging and saying he didn't care if his wife took 10 years. This wasn't a vent for hubby-bashing support; it was "this is how we view this, how do you view your OWN situation?" He loves where I'm at now. I only weaned 2 months ago (did almost 14 months this time, yea!) and was finally cleared to start Adderal again so I can finally work on getting to my preTTC weight. Got my body fat down to just inside "athlete" level, so I'm probably going to have to compromise on what the scale might say.

Thanks to the guys out there brave enough to share and cheers to all of our mommy poster's inner MILFs

If it wasn't a "husband bashing" maybe you should have worded your original post differently like you did this one by explaining exactly what you meant. It sounded more like a bragging post so that you could compare yourself to everyone else on here to allow yourself some sort of weird pleasure for losing your baby weight so fast...

NOW... That you explained your reasoning I see what you meant by your post. I just think you should of reworded it.
Cheers to you and your weight loss

Swimgoddess · June 2011

NOW... That you explained your reasoning I see what you meant by your post. I just think you should of reworded it.
Cheers to you and your weight loss

Yes, ladies please put the torches, pitchforks and spades away. There will be no more talk of crucifying my hubby tonight, lol. I realize my experience borders on freakish; I'm proud of my results but not the way I went about achieving them. Just trying to get a feel of what is more normal and socially accepted.

In my profile picture taken recently, I am a size 10. In the 9 weeks post-partum picture I was a size 12-13.

dmest · June 2011

Considering it takes 9 months to put on baby weight, I've always heard you should give yourself 9 - 12 months to lose it. I think it really varies by each woman and it also has a lot to do with your child's temperament. For instance if you have a child who doesn't sleep through the night for two years and you don't have a nanny to help out, you're probably less likely to feel like exercising and eating well if you're not getting enough sleep on a regular basis.

ladyhawk00 · June 2011

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Tinan76 · June 2011

It's no longer baby weight when you have the baby. Getting pregnant doesn't mean you have to gain xtra weight. I had two kids and put my pre pregnancy clothes on to leave the hospital. With both kids.

Collinsky · June 2011

I say nine months to a year. After my first three births, after about 8 weeks I was about a size 6... then at about 9 months I found that without changing a single thing I started shrinking. I held on to about 5 lbs after each one, but without taking care of myself at all, I looked pretty good. After my fourth one, I did NOT bounce back like that, and I needed to do something. I didn't - instead I had another baby. LOL But it's around the end of that first year that it' feels "normal" to me to get back into shape.

It's easier for some people than others - my sister-in-law was back to a size 2 two weeks after her second baby, and I was doula at a birth a month ago where the mama had practically a flat stomach right after the birth of her second baby... there are a lot of factors involved - metabolism, genetics, age, how many babies you've had, etc. It all comes into play, along with lifestyle.

When is it no longer "baby weight" TO YOU?

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