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MyFitnessPal Community

need help to help my husband

chatlieretherford

This app is helping me a lot but my husband went another way he is counting carbs and he thinks if he eats 20 grams of carbohydrates per meal then he will lose weight I think he is starving himself and he is not losing weight does anyone have any suggestions

Replies

seska422

If he's not losing weight, he's not eating at a calorie deficit.

We each have our own journey to finding what works for us.

Weight loss methods are trial and error for each individual. If he tries low carb for a while and his implementation of it doesn't work, he may be open to trying other weight loss methods.

Ninkyou

If he's not losing weight he's not starving.

Unfortunately the only thing you can do is be supportive, lead by example and be ready to answer any questions he has regarding your method. Otherwise it's you do you and he does him.

chatlieretherford

And see I've told him that but since it worked before he thinks it will work again he lost 50lbs last year then quit and now he want to do it again and all he is doing is going up in weight

chatlieretherford

But if I don't think about him ant I letting him down or not supporting him

seska422

chatlieretherford wrote: »

And see I've told him that but since it worked before he thinks it will work again he lost 50lbs last year then quit and now he want to do it again and all he is doing is going up in weight

That's up to him to figure out.

You can be supportive but you can't do it for him. There's no need to cause strife about it. Let him do his thing and ask you questions if he wants to ask questions.

chatlieretherford

That is very true we support each other in everything we do but it's hard to be happy that I'm losing weight while he us upset cuz he is gaining it

MostlyWater

It's an interesting way to go about it but maybe he'd prefer to consult a nutritionist or even his dr.

You know who lost weight like that? The comedienne, Gabriel Iglesias.

EddieHaskell97

What he's trying to do is enter ketosis in the fashion of the Atkins diet. Ketosis naturally suppresses appetite, and if he does it correctly, he absolutely will lose weight. However, if he's going to do Atkins, he might want to talk to his doctor, but at the very least read up on how to do it correctly.

Unfortunately, 60 grams carbs per day is generally outside the threshold to enter ketosis. To get into it, he should be looking at 20 to 30 net grams (carbs minus fiber) of carbs per day, not per meal. And those should come from leafy greens. (Salad, broccoli, etc...)

I've used ketosis (in conjunction with regular exercise) to lose 61 lbs in six months. When all was said and done, it amounted to a calorie deficit. The lack of pizza, bread, good beer, sugar, etc... also got really old after a month. If he can actually stick with it, it will work. But as he's doing it now, it probably won't work.

Have him buy the following (used for $0.01 + $3.99 shipping on Amazon) if he's really interested in doing ketosis:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0060598387

Also, even without ketosis, if his daily calories are too low, then he could quite possibly triggering "starvation mode" in which case he'll be feeling lousy, lethargic, and lose little-to-no weight at all. 1200 - 1400 is probably about as low as a man can go without problems.

TeaBea

chatlieretherford wrote: »

And see I've told him that but since it worked before he thinks it will work again he lost 50lbs last year then quit and now he want to do it again and all he is doing is going up in weight

It will work AGAIN when he lowers his overall calories. But, that's the problem with temporary fixes, the weight comes back.

What you are doing is a lifestyle change. Eating all foods in moderation, learning portion sizes and calories for ALL foods, not just the ones you eat while trying to lose weight.

All you can do is lead by example. The journey is not just weight loss....it's maintenance too.

brb_2013

chatlieretherford wrote: »

That is very true we support each other in everything we do but it's hard to be happy that I'm losing weight while he us upset cuz he is gaining it

He's an adult. If he wants to be successful he will figure it out. Clearly he would know if he's gaining or losing, and if he's unhappy with the results he should analyze his habits and work it out. My partner has insecurities about his weight and I figure when he wants to work on it he'll ask for help if he needs it. Until he asks I'm only responsible for my own choices and weight.

I mean, how would you feel if he decided your plan wasn't working and wasnt going to work and you need to do something different? Probably not great, regardless of whether it's working or not, being called out on your choices sucks.

chatlieretherford

Yes all that is true I guess I will wait and see if it works or not and see if he wants to ask for help

AlyAlyAlyboo

I think you're so right...my husband is soooo stubborn so I just focus on myself lol....leave him in the dust. I'm focusing on bringing sexy back for myself ...I love positivity and humour and would love to connect for platonic support and positivity! All the best with your goals

AlyAlyAlyboo

I have 50 lbs post accident weight but have lost 5 lbs already...I'm new to mfp

CharlieBeansmomTracey

EddieHaskell97 wrote: »

What he's trying to do is enter ketosis in the fashion of the Atkins diet. Ketosis naturally suppresses appetite, and if he does it correctly, he absolutely will lose weight. However, if he's going to do Atkins, he might want to talk to his doctor, but at the very least read up on how to do it correctly.

Unfortunately, 60 grams carbs per day is generally outside the threshold to enter ketosis. To get into it, he should be looking at 20 to 30 net grams (carbs minus fiber) of carbs per day, not per meal. And those should come from leafy greens. (Salad, broccoli, etc...)

I've used ketosis (in conjunction with regular exercise) to lose 61 lbs in six months. When all was said and done, it amounted to a calorie deficit. The lack of pizza, bread, good beer, sugar, etc... also got really old after a month. If he can actually stick with it, it will work. But as he's doing it now, it probably won't work.

Have him buy the following (used for $0.01 + $3.99 shipping on Amazon) if he's really interested in doing ketosis:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0060598387

Also, even without ketosis, if his daily calories are too low, then he could quite possibly triggering "starvation mode" in which case he'll be feeling lousy, lethargic, and lose little-to-no weight at all. 1200 - 1400 is probably about as low as a man can go without problems.

there is no starvation mode in this scenario,and 1200-1400 is too low for a man.mfp recommends 1500 at the least. if he was eating like 1200-1400 he would still lose weight. hes obviously eating over his maintenance if he is gaining.

chatlieretherford

So he is almost 300lbs and is 5 10 tall so what should his calories be where would I find that we have on phone no internet so if he wanted to join he can't but I can try and do it through mine and right it down on paper but need to know where to fine the info

ElizabethOakes2

You might gently suggest that he talk to his doctor about his weight loss journey and ask for a referral to a dietary specialist. Honestly, it took our doctor telling my husband quite bluntly that if he didn't change, he was going to end up on meds for diabetes and high cholesterol and probably die to really listen and understand what he needed to do. It was always, "I just need to work out more"... but he'd work out and then eat a giant burger with fries and a milkshake. It took tracking his intake to really understand what he needed to change, and us spouses are the last people that they want to listen to, especially when we're fighting our own obesity fights.

You can use calculators at http://www.iifym.com/tdee-calculator/ to figure out what he should be eating.

chatlieretherford

Thanks that might help not the doctors I've tried that but if he sees all the calories he eats and the lack of movements