My husband is lean and trying to gain, I am obese and trying to lose weight

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So I make most of our meals and lately for about 11 weeks I've been cooking healthier. My husband actually lost 3lbs! Which is terrible for him cuz he doesn't want to lose weight! He 71.5" weighs 137lbs. He's done the protein shakes and body building, but that has slacked off after having twins. What can I do to help my husband gain weight?

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  • Scamd83
    Scamd83 Posts: 808 Member
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    What can I do to help my husband gain weight?

    Not a thing, that's up to him.
  • cnbbnc
    cnbbnc Posts: 1,267 Member
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    If he doesn't have a huge appetite the easiest thing would be to eat high calorie foods. Peanut butter, nuts, avocado, oils. Anything that is a buttload of calories in a small package.
  • punkrockgoth
    punkrockgoth Posts: 534 Member
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    Scamd83 wrote: »
    What can I do to help my husband gain weight?

    Not a thing, that's up to him.

    Ultimately, your husband is responsible for his own goals. However, I can understand the desire to be supportive. Ask him how he wants to be supported. Talk to him about your goals and how you would like to be supported.
    cnbbnc wrote: »
    If he doesn't have a huge appetite the easiest thing would be to eat high calorie foods. Peanut butter, nuts, avocado, oils. Anything that is a buttload of calories in a small package.

    You mentioned doing a lot of the cooking which in some respects can make things a little tricky. My SO and I have different calorie requirements, which is pretty normal. He is a bit heavier than me and sedentary, I am very active.

    We've handled it by making one base meal and then adding toppings and/or splitting the portions differently where appropriate. It's easy to top a salad with some extra seeds or avocado or split the meals more like he gets 1/3 and I get 2/3.

    But mostly what I sad above about having an open conversation together about your goals and how to support each other though them. It's an ongoing conversation to be had more than once because as you progress, your needs will change.




  • wesley58
    wesley58 Posts: 129 Member
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    Sorry, I would never encourage anyone to gain weight. Working out to tone muscle, and eating healthy would be more important than gaining weight just to get heavier
  • BodyByBex
    BodyByBex Posts: 3,685 Member
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    wesley58 wrote: »
    Sorry, I would never encourage anyone to gain weight. Working out to tone muscle, and eating healthy would be more important than gaining weight just to get heavier

    Normally, I'm with you, but I guess you missed a couple of parts so I bolded them for you :smile:
    mkh858 wrote: »
    So I make most of our meals and lately for about 11 weeks I've been cooking healthier. My husband actually lost 3lbs! Which is terrible for him cuz he doesn't want to lose weight! He 71.5" (5'9.5"?) weighs 137lbs. He's done the protein shakes and body building, but that has slacked off after having twins. What can I do to help my husband gain weight?


    I hope he is still maintaining with the workouts for body building. He should at least be doing some workouts and of COURSE getting enough protein(building blocks for muscles) is important so try and help him with that. My coworker's secret for gaining is sauces. He puts different high calorie sauces on everything and that helps him bulk. So maybe cook something where he can have a high calorie sauce available and you can have it on the side in smaller amounts to also achieve your goals.

    I also agree with what has been stated previously, HE has to want it and HE has to be paying attention to it.
    You can't keep an eye on him and make sure he's stuffing his face all the time. You both have twins to care for but you also both need to make sure that you make caring for yourselves a priority.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,139 Member
    edited March 2016
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    wesley58 wrote: »
    Sorry, I would never encourage anyone to gain weight. Working out to tone muscle, and eating healthy would be more important than gaining weight just to get heavier

    why not???

    what if someone wants to add mass, what course would you recommend besides gaining weight???
  • 883xlsportster
    883xlsportster Posts: 221 Member
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    wesley58 wrote: »
    Sorry, I would never encourage anyone to gain weight. Working out to tone muscle, and eating healthy would be more important than gaining weight just to get heavier

    Different goals for different folks :-)
  • rippedhippie
    rippedhippie Posts: 24 Member
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    Beachbody's program called BODY BEAST. I'm not a beach body coach and have no dog in the fight. I've gone from 157lbs @ 12/5% body fat to 167lbs @ 13% body fat.
  • windee52
    windee52 Posts: 1,690 Member
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    Strength training! Build some muscle, the rest will follow!
  • kingkam21
    kingkam21 Posts: 76 Member
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    Scamd83 wrote: »
    What can I do to help my husband gain weight?

    Not a thing, that's up to him.

    I agree 100%. For him to gain weight (the right weight gain, being muscle not fat), he will halfto eat more meals on top of a training routine. If your cooking healthy than that is GREAT! It will help you lose and it will help him stay on a lean bulk (meaning he won't gain to much fat). Continue doing what you need to do to lose weight and he needs to do whatever he needs to do, which he's obviously not. P.S.- he doesn't need protein shake unless he's working out often, otherwise Hel get protein from real food
  • Commander_Keen
    Commander_Keen Posts: 1,181 Member
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    mkh858 wrote: »
    So I make most of our meals and lately for about 11 weeks I've been cooking healthier. My husband actually lost 3lbs! Which is terrible for him cuz he doesn't want to lose weight! He 71.5" weighs 137lbs. He's done the protein shakes and body building, but that has slacked off after having twins. What can I do to help my husband gain weight?

    You don't.
    As long as you are cooking healthy for your self, allow him or cook enough for him to have 2 or 3 portions.

    On a side note, if he really wanted to "gain weight" he could have a McD milk shake or an Ice coffee as they can have 1000 calories per portion/serving.