Feeling down

jokoh92
jokoh92 Posts: 112 Member
in Motivation and Support
I should feel on top of the world now that I have hit a major milestone...Onederland...but instead I feel worse than ever before because I am realizing its never going to be enough. I am doing this for myself but I am human and sometimes I just wish I could make him see what other people see. He will never give me a chance and it sucks. Its not going to stop me from reaching goal because I want to be healthy but being happy is never going to happen for me and I should just accept it.

Replies

  • rys_lb
    rys_lb Posts: 2 Member
    Every day The lord gives you a cause to rejoice and the rest is up to you..! All up to you you decide to be happy, healthy, is all on you. ;)
  • jokoh92
    jokoh92 Posts: 112 Member
    rys_lb wrote: »
    Every day The lord gives you a cause to rejoice and the rest is up to you..! All up to you you decide to be happy, healthy, is all on you. ;)

    Thanks! :)
  • nnclarkee
    nnclarkee Posts: 2 Member
    Sometimes our mind likes to play with our emotions, and negativity starts to flow in. Keep your head up girl! If he can't love you for who you are inside and out, then it's his loss. You got this!!!!
  • saraAmcd
    saraAmcd Posts: 81 Member
    Not true. Your happiness is not tied to any single individual (or any single event or state of being for that matter). People may sway and influence us, but they do not determine our lives.
  • OyGeeBiv
    OyGeeBiv Posts: 733 Member
    Things turn out best for people who make the best of how things turn out.

    You said you're doing it for yourself, but it seems your motivation really lies in getting a guy to notice you. If he's not noticing you, he's not the guy who should be noticing you. Maybe the right guy is trying to get your attention, but you haven't noticed him because your focus is elsewhere. Or maybe the right guy hasn't come into your life yet. Keep your focus on reaching your goal, for yourself. And keep your eyes and mind open to more possibilities.

    You can do it!
  • Rick_Nelson81
    Rick_Nelson81 Posts: 205 Member
    You are much more than a number on the scale! Your endeavor to lose weight and look more attractive to someone else is fine, but the way you feel about yourself is far more important IMO. Feel confident about yourself and your ability to change your life first and foremost. If you are truly happy with who you are, then the way you feel about this other person might not weigh so heavily on your shoulders. If this person isn't drawn to the person that you are (as opposed to just your body) then you're most likely better off without him anyway, and feel good that you have the power to choose someone else, rather than hoping this one person among billions will choose you. Keep your head up and be yourself.
  • augustremulous
    augustremulous Posts: 378 Member
    Sounds like now that you've hit a milestone it's time for you to upgrade to a better love interest ;)

    I know what it's like to have someone whose approval and acceptance is impossible to garner. They're projecting their own insecurities on you, and I get that knowing this doesn't help, but you need to develop the emotional, and maybe geographic distance to learn how to look at yourself with objectivity and compassion. I had such a person in my life for years - this person would continually emotionally abuse me and put me down, and because it was my life, it seems normal. I got away from her by literally moving across the country - now I see her for a few minutes twice a year, and when I remember the way I used to interact with her, I'm shocked at how passive I was and how much I tolerated. But it's hard to really see a situation as normal or abnormal when you're facing it everyday. In fact, this move was actually what I needed to see her with compassion and understand her pain, too. In every day life, it's very hard to feel compassion for your bully.

    Unrequited love sucks. But I tell you this - feeling it now will make it easier to love stronger and deeper when the right person comes along.

    You will be happy, by the way. I'm sure of it. It takes a certain strength and motivation to achieve what you've achieved so far, and those are the makings of someone who's happy and peaceful. Many of us, and by that I mean *all* of us, have felt the way you do now. And all of us will again, because that's what life throws at you. But you're strong, and getting stronger everyday. So take the lessons you've learned about how to treat your body and apply it to your psyche.
  • shadowfax_c11
    shadowfax_c11 Posts: 1,942 Member
    edited March 2016
    Sounds like whoever he is, is not the sort of person you need in your life. Toxic people will never see anything positive in anything that does not focus on and benefit them. This person is never going to change and you should not be doing this to make them happy. This is for you. And person in your life might be a weight you also need to drop.

    Congrats on making it to Onederland! That is really an accomplishment and you deserve to be proud of that.

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