Weird Reaction to Wanting to be Fit??.....

TGraceS
TGraceS Posts: 23 Member
in Motivation and Support
So, today I switched gyms. I have been working out at Planet Fitness but I am wanting to get more into lifting and wanting more than just a big cardio room and some machines. I am really happy with the gym that I chose (UFC) and was telling my roommate about it and I got a really weird reaction from her. Basically, my goal is to be strong, but I am vain and want to see my abs. She goes "but the problem is you can't maintain that" and I'm just like... what? I mean, I know the body changes so rapidly and I won't see abs forever but I just want to see them ONCE! And to be strong... Maybe I will be a powerlifter someday, who knows! I just want to be strong. And then she goes on to say that "lifting weights doesn't make you strong" but could not explain how that could possibly make sense.

It made me feel really dismissed. Like, I know I have a lot of work to do before I get to that point, but I couldn't BELIEVE that was what she had to say. It's like she doesn't want me to be fit and healthy.

Good thing I'm the kind of person who likes to prove people wrong :)
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Replies

  • _angee
    _angee Posts: 24 Member
    Work hard and prove her wrong :) people don't always react so kindly to people's goals unfortunately
  • GaleHawkins
    GaleHawkins Posts: 8,159 Member
    @TGraceS best of success. Doer's hear that all of the time from those who don't Do. It is not just about health either.
  • MommaChubs79
    MommaChubs79 Posts: 10 Member
    You can do anything you set your mind to! It's unfortunate you don't have her support :(
  • coalz
    coalz Posts: 308 Member
    Fuel for the fire. Get it gurl!
  • obedient670
    obedient670 Posts: 26 Member
    Hi TGraceS,
    I lost 80 pounds 6 years ago.
    I heard the exact same comment "you can't maintain this. You can't keep up this pace". Mostly from over weight unhappy people. But the truth is, they weren't seeing the whole picture. It's a lifestyle change and you can maintain it. Sure your workouts might change a little when you reach goal and go into maintenance but YOU know you have to keep it up in order to maintain.

    Weight loss causes some weird emotions. There were actually women who quit speaking to me when I lost the weight. Found out who my true friends are though.

    Good luck. Don't listen to the doubters!
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    unless she is someone who's in to health & fitness, she wont 'get it'. this is why i don't share my fitness goals with RL people, i do it on here!
  • sijomial
    sijomial Posts: 19,809 Member
    Your friend doesn't sound very smart and to be honest doesn't sound like much of a friend!

    "Good thing I'm the kind of person who likes to prove people wrong :) "
    Yep - motivation comes from within.
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    How long do you plan to stick to it?
  • CollieFit
    CollieFit Posts: 1,683 Member
    Your flatmate obviously doesn't have a clue. Sorry about that.
  • TGraceS
    TGraceS Posts: 23 Member
    EvgeniZyntx wrote: »
    How long do you plan to stick to it?

    Stick to what? Dieting? Only until I hit my goal weight, then I want to do a recomp and maybe bulk. I want to see what my potential is. Fitness? Forever. I am surrounded by athletes, my boyfriend and all of his siblings compete in their sports at a national level. I don't necessarily want to COMPETE but I do want to be like them. And I LIKE working out... lifting heavy things is fun.. even cardio is fun with the right music lol. So yeah I don't think I could maintain the kind of physique I am after forever, but I can commit to this lifestyle forever for sure.
  • lkpducky
    lkpducky Posts: 17,640 Member
    "Lifting weights doesn't make you strong"??

    smiley-rolleyes003.gif

    You can do it! Looking forward to hearing about your progress later.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,989 Member
    You and your roomate need only agree on a few of things: paying the rent on time, sharing of utilities, and respect for each others privacy. Other than that, what you and she does personally shouldn't matter as long as it doesn't impose on the other.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
  • BrianSharpe
    BrianSharpe Posts: 9,248 Member
    Google Ernestine Shepherd and then have your friend tell you the "you can't maintain that"......she's 75 years old.....
  • CassidyScaglione
    CassidyScaglione Posts: 673 Member
    edited March 2016
    This is my aunt :

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9gXvHreex0

    She has 3 World Records, 5 Canadian records, and 10 provincial records in powerlifting. lol. You can do whatever you like.
  • TGraceS
    TGraceS Posts: 23 Member
    @CassidyScaglione wow!! I love that! Thank you!
  • Afura
    Afura Posts: 2,054 Member
    Just nod and smile and do your own thing. Not everyone is going to agree with you, and that's ok because you will learn what's best for you, even if it's just temporary abs. :wink:
  • rsclause
    rsclause Posts: 3,103 Member
    Nothing like a good challenge to drive you. It will take a strong will on two fronts, in the gym and in the kitchen. If you have weight to lose you may want to focus on that and lifting for strength first. Once you get your body fat % low then start to add bulk.
  • CassidyScaglione
    CassidyScaglione Posts: 673 Member
    I also found this: https://www.facebook.com/Upworthy/videos/1231145640259625/
  • singingflutelady
    singingflutelady Posts: 8,736 Member
    edited March 2016
    CassidyScaglione wrote: »
    I also found this: https://www.facebook.com/Upworthy/videos/1231145640259625/

    There was a story that trended on fb a few days ago of a senior (I think 78 but don't recall) lady deadlifting 225 lbs
  • JustinAnimal
    JustinAnimal Posts: 1,335 Member
    It sounds like jealousy.
  • chelsy0587
    chelsy0587 Posts: 441 Member
    Some many things to quote here...

    If you really do take this as a lifestyle change then she won't be able to ignore the fact that it has worked for you, you have maintained it and she was wrong...

    But like you already know this will take some time, so until then just smile at her as your muscles are sore and your body aches from intense workouts... then when she is jealous when you are at the apartment pool tell her its all those weights that you lift that DONT make you strong :smiley:
  • _lyndseybrooke_
    _lyndseybrooke_ Posts: 2,561 Member
    TGraceS wrote: »
    So, today I switched gyms. I have been working out at Planet Fitness but I am wanting to get more into lifting and wanting more than just a big cardio room and some machines. I am really happy with the gym that I chose (UFC) and was telling my roommate about it and I got a really weird reaction from her. Basically, my goal is to be strong, but I am vain and want to see my abs. She goes "but the problem is you can't maintain that" and I'm just like... what? I mean, I know the body changes so rapidly and I won't see abs forever but I just want to see them ONCE! And to be strong... Maybe I will be a powerlifter someday, who knows! I just want to be strong. And then she goes on to say that "lifting weights doesn't make you strong" but could not explain how that could possibly make sense.

    It made me feel really dismissed. Like, I know I have a lot of work to do before I get to that point, but I couldn't BELIEVE that was what she had to say. It's like she doesn't want me to be fit and healthy.

    Good thing I'm the kind of person who likes to prove people wrong :)

    Your roommate is an idiot. Do your thing, get strong, and then rub it in her face later. :smile: The jealousy dynamic between women is so stupid. Don't worry about it.
  • Pathmonkey
    Pathmonkey Posts: 108 Member
    Jealousy can make people behave in strange, mean spirited ways..... let it roll and get to the gym! :) Her problem, not yours!
  • Mirasaki
    Mirasaki Posts: 27 Member
    Your roommate doesn't seem to know what shes talking about, and since she can't do it she's telling you that you can't do it.

    You should absolutely go for it and just do with your body what you want to do. Whenever I mention about doing new fitness things to my family they always say that I can't do it or that I'll hurt myself, but I do it anyway because I know that I can and I'm not going to limit myself anymore and just have a lazy attitude of "I can't do anything therefore why try, I'll never succeed".

    Go out there and show everyone that you can do it no matter what they want to project on to you :)
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    I have some friends who really aren't into fitness and I don't really discuss fitness with them...and if they happen to say something to me about pretty much anything fitness related I just nod and smile and ignore them because they generally don't know what the hell they're talking about and I do. Fortunately, many of my friends are fitness junkies.
  • benjaminhk
    benjaminhk Posts: 353 Member
    I've learned to never run ideas or goals by the people that are supposed to be the most supportive in life. Even if they aren't working against me, I know it has a negative impact on me if they don't share my excitement. That part is my flaw. I shouldn't be so dependent on others for emotional support, if that is what it is.
  • NaturalNancy
    NaturalNancy Posts: 1,093 Member
    Ignore her and her reactions and opinions.
    Unfortunately it's very common for ppl to be unsupportive of new goals!
  • madhatter2013
    madhatter2013 Posts: 1,547 Member
    It sounds to me like she "tried" it some time ago, FAILED, and now wants to make sure you don't "make the same mistake".
  • SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage
    SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage Posts: 2,668 Member
    Great, now you have even more motivation! Get it girl!
  • JUknowPK
    JUknowPK Posts: 482 Member
    I'd get a new roommate, no need to negativity, we have enough in our own minds.

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