Women only please! (Unless you're a doctor)

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  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,141 Member
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    Hmm, the cramping around the time you would have started could be a sign of pregnancy. However, if you've done so many tests and all are negative it would seem unlikely that you are.

    You're not eating much, exercising to cut even the few calories you are consuming and are stressed by many factors...I would say these are the factors which are delaying your period.

    Please eat more, it's not healthy to take in so few calories, this will only add to your stress levels.

    You know the first year of marriage is very, very hard, don't be so hard on yourself.
  • alyssa92982
    alyssa92982 Posts: 1,093 Member
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    It could be pregnancy or stress or losing wgt too quick, lots of factors here. I'd be googling or looking in your yellow pages for a pregnancy clinic-they do all sorts of free testing. Rule out pregnancy. 1st then go from there. Good luck
  • kimmerroze
    kimmerroze Posts: 1,330 Member
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    Im newly married too, soo experiencing lots of the same things EXCEPT the period and extreme depression.

    BUT, My husband is unemployed and we are living off of my income.

    so its stressful and it is hard to not get down on your situation because things kinda suck.

    My advice is this, I don't know if you are a religious person or not but I suggest meditating, whether that be reading the bible, a self empowerment book or simply laying down and focusing on absolutely NOTHING, relax your body, relax your mind, JUST RELAX.

    NETTING only 700 calories will cause you to miss a period, so will being stressed, so will losing ten pounds so will being pregnant, So there is no way to really tell.

    But relaxing and eating a little more will solve the stress and missed period if that is the case. you and your husband need to sit down and chat and yes you definately need to seek therapy for your depression, a small dose of medicine could cure so much for you.
  • ashley_jorah
    ashley_jorah Posts: 71 Member
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    If you've tried five tests over a course of a few days (better if by multiple manufacturers) and they're all negative, I'd say it's fairly safe to assume you're not pregnant. Urine tests are surprisingly accurate if performed correctly and if done after your missed period.
    There are many many reasons you're body will skip your period. Stress is one of the largest.
    You also have the added stress of eating low calories and working out. Your body may have simply decided it didn't want to waste energy menstrating.
  • Chrysti3
    Chrysti3 Posts: 4
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    Your body probably CAN'T menstruate because you are likely anemic and definitely malnourished. 1000 calories per day isn't nearly enough for someone as active as you are and aside from starving yourself, your body is likely holding on to every calorie it can get just to keep itself going. You have GOT to take better care of yourself! No more excuses! Everyone is busy, everyone has stress, everyone wants to be skinny - you've got to do it the right way or the other issues you'll face will be MUCH worse. I woulnd't worry about being pregnant... your body is probably in such shock right now you are likely not ovulating anyway.
  • Elle_Jamaicangirl81
    Elle_Jamaicangirl81 Posts: 418 Member
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    well, my period has been delayed more than 2 weeks before... hmm, twice now that i think about it.. Both times i was extremely stressed out.

    I went to the gyno, she told me i have stress induced amenoria... (absence of period due to stress)


    it did come back, but only after i took a pregnancy test (the first time) and saw someone.... think my brain decided it was ok, calmed down and brought it back


    i would go check it. even for your own piece of mind. (it will help to bring it back if it really is caused by the stress)

    you dont want to delay it... as your lining must shed, u dont want the build up of hormones in your body.

    Hope this helps, feel free to msg me to talk more of my experience
  • dragonflydi
    dragonflydi Posts: 665 Member
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    Here are some more facts. This past month has been incredibly stressful for me. I'm working full time and taking night classes. I am in a new marriage and although it's happy, it can be trying at times because we are both young. I've been incredibly depressed to the point that my family doctor suggested I seek therapy. I'm still in the process of unpacking my home. Of course like any newly married couple, we have many financial problems. I am obsessed with losing weight and have been furiously tracking everything and beating myself up if I slip or don't work out that day. On average I consume 1,000 calories a day and burn about 300 daily. Over the past three months I've lost 10lbs. Another root of my depression is that my husband lost 50lbs last year and looks amazing and he didn't have to do anything. It makes me feel disgusting even though he is very supportive and reassuring. And now of course I am stressing about possibly being pregnant because I drink a glass of wine every night before bed.

    All of these factors could EASILY cause a missed period and yes, I speak from experience. If all of this continues, you could be in for bigger issues than just a missed period though as stress is incredibly hard on the body, so getting at least some of it taken care of would be a very good idea. Without insurance, the cost for blood tests, meds for depression, etc. are going to be hard to come by if you are already struggling financially, but if you can find a way to do this ... a low cost clinic, etc, that would be a good place to start. Even just decreasing your stress load by one or two of these things would probably help to make you feel a little less axious ... which is what I read into the origingal post.

    I hope things turn out OK and you keep us posted :)
  • superjae5
    superjae5 Posts: 64 Member
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    I had an ovarian cyst once--I'm not saying it's necessarily that, but just something to consider. It made me feel dizzy and nauseous sometimes, sometimes extremely light-headed. They can mess with your ovaries. I'd probably say ask about it as a possibility if you miss it twice, especially if you have a blood test done. Your CA-125 level will be high if you do have one.

    I'm inclined to agree with most here, that it's probably just stress or a fluke. But I always tell people about it, because my cyst got dangerously large and if I'd known earlier I probably wouldn't have an ugly surgery scar. ;)
  • WWhitaker
    WWhitaker Posts: 309
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    I'm the same as you are. Last year I was dealing with so much stress I didn't have a period for 5 months, and of course I took a dozen pregnancy tests all giving me the same reassurance: Negative. I, too at the time did not have insurance so it was even more stressful relying on at-home pregnancy tests and not having the verification of a doctor. Look objectively, you're working full time, going to school it sounds like you just moved and you're married. Weight loss can also effect your cycle, so you need to take that into consideration. I'm not a huge fan of Planned Parenthood, just from a personal experience, but IF you are pregnant, and you do drink, you need to find out sooner than later. Try applying for state insurance. Best of luck.
  • missxchelly
    missxchelly Posts: 180
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    Yeah, you can go to Planned Parenthood and have them to a blood test. It's free or very very very low cost. I am actually JUST like you. I'm been married for a year this Saturday, new marriage, my life is very stressful, I am often incredibly stressed or depressed, etc. My periods have been off and on because a year and a half ago I got off of Depo and everything has been whacky since then plus I have gained some weight. Here is what I know from experience.

    Stress will cause you to be late, depression too. Even the slightest amount of stress will off set your period. A lot of exercise will do it too. Any changes to your body will do it. Lose weight, gain weight, etc.
  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
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    Today's home pregnancy tests are actually pretty darn accurate. They've gotten much better over the last 20 years.

    You do sound incredibly stressed out and that can certainly cause you to skip. Also, it doesn't sound like you're eating enough. A 700 calorie per day net is not good for you. Anorexics stop having periods, mostly because their body fat is too low to support a pregnancy. I'm sure that's probably not your issue, but it's something to consider.

    I can tell you that I've been in your situation. I was married in my early 20s. Money was always tight and things were usually a bit stressful. I'm sure the thought of a pregnancy on top of everything else is making it even worse. Don't worry, it does get better!!

    Take a deep breath and try to do some things to help you relax. Long baths, exercise (if that de-stresses you), etc. Wait until you're due for your period again and if it doesn't come, definitely check out Planned Parenthood or another women's clinic. Or you could go today if it would help your peace of mind.
  • dlaplume2
    dlaplume2 Posts: 1,658 Member
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    You are probably not pregnant if the urine tests keep saying negative and you are that late. You mentioned premenopausal and hot flashes, but did not mention your age. Stress and all the other symptoms you talked about certainly can cause you to skip a period. I do agree with going to a clinic for a test, though they usually do a urine test too. IF you decide to wait though, one recommendation I do have, which you will probably want to hit me for, is you should be treating your body as if you are pregnant. take care of yourself just in case. When I was ttc my doctor told me to act as if I were pregnant, not to smoke or drink and take my prenatal vitamins, etc. You might want to consinder that just in case. (my disclaimer is I am very fertile, it wasn't like it was going to take months and I was going to miss out on wine at New Years or a wedding or anything) Just a thought


    Best wishes to you,
  • rn_jacki
    rn_jacki Posts: 21 Member
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    well if the only reason your stressing is because you like one glass of wine before bed at night i wouldn't worry. fetal alcohol syndrome is from severe alcoholics... think a 24 pack everynight.

    FYI: this is so wrong in so many ways. I certainly hope noone actually listens to this. Sure a glass of wine here or there MIGHT not harm your baby. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is NOT just for severe alcoholics. There are NO research studies that accurately indicate how much alcohol is a safe amount of alcohol to consume while pregnant because no person in their right mind would sign up to participate in that study! If you (or anyone) thinks they are pregnant consuming alcohol should be postponed!
  • comma44
    comma44 Posts: 6 Member
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    If pregnany tests are negative and you've done 5 of them, chances are you probably aren't pregnant - a blood test would be the best way to confirm.

    But let's talk about those 1000 calories, and the 700 net. I used to be anorexic, once I got to restricting below 1200 calories and getting into the 0-1000 range... I lost my period. It only took me 1-2 months to get that point and I was not underweight yet when they stopped. Coming from someone that has been there... 700 net calories *really* isn't enough to fuel your body. Even 1000 calories is not enough. Losing your period is your body's way of telling you that it no longer considers you healthy enough to nourish a baby and that it is literally only currently able to keep up with the most basic processes to keep you alive. A 700-1000 calorie diet is not sustainable, it will affect your mood immensely (you said your depressed), and when you lose weight and reach your goal weight and start eating "normally" your body will have adapted to a ridiculously low calorie intake and you will gain weight very quickly.

    I know it can be hard to do this a slow and steady way especially when you are comparing yourself to your husband and his weight loss. But I would really encourage you to do this in a more healthy way, consult with a doctor. I have been told to eat no less than 1500 calories and that my net calories shouldn't be lower than 1200 ever, and even that is pushing it. I want to restrict to lower calories because I know I can do it, I've done it before. But I also don't want to open the door to all the psychological and physical issues that come with it, and I want this to be a sustainable change that will last for a lifetime, not just for a year. Good luck to you :)
  • taurie
    taurie Posts: 225 Member
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    Is there a Planned Parenthood near you? I'm sure there is some way you can see a medical professional without having to pay a lot.

    That being said, you probably missed your period due to stress. Increasing exercise, dieting, getting married, moving are all stressful. Give your body some TLC... you might find once you relax for a couple days you might just get your period.

    There's nothing you can do about the wine you had... but it would probably be a good idea to not have any more until you confirm you are not pregnant. Different governments give different guidelines as to what is considered safe in regards to alcohol consumption while you are pregnant. In the US they tell you to completely abstain; here in the UK it's 1 to 2 units no more than 2x a week if you choose not to abstain. It's obviously safest to abstain.
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
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    I can't say enough good things about Planned Parenthood. :heart: They're so wonderfully supportive, understanding and non-judgmental that I *still* go there, at 39 years of age with decent insurance. I like 'em better than my regular doc.

    First step - make sure you're not pregnant. Second step - decide what you want to use to prevent getting pregnant. It's likely to be stress, exercise and not eating enough this time, but you can't count on the pull-out method.
  • strapple
    strapple Posts: 353 Member
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    thank everyone so much for their advice and kind words.

    i wanted to clarify a couple more things. i know it only takes once, but my husband and i have only had sex one time since my last period (because weve been busy/stressed)

    also i said i had premenopausal cramps but i meant premenstrual (auto correct messed me up there)

    from everything i've read here i've decided to call planned parenthood to arrange a blood test and work on finding some free counseling through my school to help alleviate stress. no more wine until the blood test results come in! i am also going to try much harder to net 1200 calories like a normal person. thank you so much everyone for your support.
  • justsummie
    justsummie Posts: 320 Member
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    well if the only reason your stressing is because you like one glass of wine before bed at night i wouldn't worry. fetal alcohol syndrome is from severe alcoholics... think a 24 pack everynight.

    FYI: this is so wrong in so many ways. I certainly hope noone actually listens to this. Sure a glass of wine here or there MIGHT not harm your baby. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is NOT just for severe alcoholics. There are NO research studies that accurately indicate how much alcohol is a safe amount of alcohol to consume while pregnant because no person in their right mind would sign up to participate in that study! If you (or anyone) thinks they are pregnant consuming alcohol should be postponed!

    Can't say that I 100% agree with FAS being only for severe alcholics but I do know several women who were worried about finding out they pregnant after having a few drink-filled nights and they're doctors all gave them pretty much the same speech: the stress placed on your body by worrying about it is worse than the act it self. I've also heard about one glass of red-wine having potential health benefits.
  • dlaplume2
    dlaplume2 Posts: 1,658 Member
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    thank everyone so much for their advice and kind words.

    i wanted to clarify a couple more things. i know it only takes once, but my husband and i have only had sex one time since my last period (because weve been busy/stressed)

    also i said i had premenopausal cramps but i meant premenstrual (auto correct messed me up there)

    from everything i've read here i've decided to call planned parenthood to arrange a blood test and work on finding some free counseling through my school to help alleviate stress. no more wine until the blood test results come in! i am also going to try much harder to net 1200 calories like a normal person. thank you so much everyone for your support.

    Good for you.
    I truly hope you get the answers you are hoping for. Best wishes.
  • skibrina
    skibrina Posts: 36
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    there could be a lot of factors going on with you. Stress is your number 1 thing right now. Stress can reduce your period. Also, burning 300 calories and only getting 700 calories will put your body into stress mode. You have to feed your body. us girls are not like men. they can loose weight quickly. it's there male testosagen. (can't spell) I struggle myself. my husdand can loose weight very quickly. i get bummed and discouraged. don't beat yourself up. a new marriage, it does take some time to get used to. both my husband and I have been married before. we also have kids from our previous marriage and have 1 together. it is a lot of work. i just turned 33 this year. the demands on life can weigh us all down. you and your husband need to find what will work for you. if you are really worried about getting pregnant then you might want to consider other forms for birth control. my youngest son, is the pull out method. doesn't alway go the way we want it planned. i love him to death. maybe taking some time off from work, and getting your house put together, or have a girls night out. just so you can feel like you again. the pressure you are facing can really be a burden at times. i agree with the other girls here. find a free clinic get tested for pregnancy and find a thereapist or someone you can help some help from and confide in. It really helps when you have someone outside listening. I pray for you that all gets better for you. we are all here to help each other out. I hope i didn't say anything to offend you in any way. enjoy life!!! the demands can be challenging. so rewarding!!!! take care sweetie!
    Sabrina:happy:

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