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How to not be obsessed....

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brb_2013
brb_2013 Posts: 1,197 Member
Hello,

I took a long break from trying to re-lose some LBs I gained back after a hefty loss. I started in a really bad mental place, so taking time off and getting myself into a positive place was more important.

A few weeks ago I tentatively started again but this week I'm in, started on Wednesday with logging and weighing my food and I've been exercising regularly all week. I'm very proud of myself.

My calorie goal is nice and high on purpose. I'm 5'6.5'' and weigh 263lbs, lightly active and I am allowed to eat up to 2200 and will be set to lose 1lb per week. This is to save sanity, let me have big dinners, and I have yet to actually eat all I'm allowed (just not hungry for more than 1800/1900). I know this will be an appropriate amount for me for quite a while.

Im having a tough time just letting it be, and not thinking about the process constantly. I prelog in the morning, and sometimes I need to make adjustments but for the most part I click on the app 10-20 times a day to re-read, double check, obsess basically. I check trend weight and mentally think about how soon I'll see it be a true downward trend.

I don't feel I'm yet into the dangerous territory I hit before but this constant checking in is how it started. Do any of you also struggle with this? I am trying to think of ways to relax my mindset but I'm coming up short.

Replies

  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
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    Do you have any non-weight fitness goals? I have found that having those helps to keep me from thinking about how long it takes to lose weight. Any kind of goal helps--walk X times a week, walk for X minutes, be able to do a certain type of exercise, then be able to do that exercise X number of times, eat X servings of veggies/fruits, try one new veggie a week, etc.
  • Mike02209
    Mike02209 Posts: 301 Member
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    I have always struggled with this, I can't say I recommend it and I am sure others will say not to as well, but what worked for me was to log consistently for a period of time and then stop. What I believe happened was the discipline in regards to my eating during the faithful logging phase helped me learn how to eat, and I noticed it also had a large impact on my portion sizes. Where as in the past I would eat half a pizza, now I would be sated after a couple of slices. As a result my weight loss has been consistently just under a pound a week for over a year now. If I start to feel like I am slipping or the scale shows I am gaining, I revert back to daily logging once again. Probably not the most efficient way to lose weight, but otherwise I think about it all day, and that gets exhausting.
  • brb_2013
    brb_2013 Posts: 1,197 Member
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    I do have a goal to exercise 3-4 days a week until I feel like my body is capable of more. I bet some real goals would help. Its hard though because I don't aspire to do too much beyond just getting to a smaller me. I should push harder into myself and find something to work toward.

    My first time losing 100lbs it was for a major surgery,and to save $10k on costs I had to be below 35bmi to have the operation as an inpatient procedure. After that recovery process I really pushed into exercise, just cardio though. It got boring and I stopped.

    I hope someday to influence my partner into lifting again, he was a big wrestler and football player in high school and its something I'd love to share with him.

    I just want to be healthy enough to live a normal life span, and be small enough to shop where ever I want. Perhaps I need something a little deeper to aspire to.
  • GrinnyMae
    GrinnyMae Posts: 55 Member
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    I think a couple things might help. Be more specific in setting your goals and make them progressive. Things like "be healthy" or "be small" are so vague. Can you pick out a few measurable things that will help you mark progress/success? Like reducing cholesterol, losing X% body fat, losing X number of inches. What does success look like for you?

    And once you've got some more specific goals, come up with a road map of how to get there. The constant checking-in and obsession is the mark of someone wanting to control something. (I should know :wink: ) So take control and make a plan, write it down and go from there.
  • brb_2013
    brb_2013 Posts: 1,197 Member
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    Thank you. At my doctors visit this week we discussed ways to avoid my same mental health issue again,and one was to keep a weight loss goal out of my mind and to keep a time frame or deadline out as well. But I see now I can have a different style of goal. I feel like they always have some sort of timing involved, but I can try to keep the pressure off and keep myself calm. I enjoy my current lifestyle changes which is huge for me, just need to work on some goals.
  • RosemaryBronte
    RosemaryBronte Posts: 103 Member
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    I think a useful thing would be to learn to draw faces or to take up gardening or ... anything that is fun and interesting and takes your mind off dieting. I often eat when I'm bored or lonely so doing social or creative things can be good for weight loss but also reduce the obsession with dieting.
  • GrinnyMae
    GrinnyMae Posts: 55 Member
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    brb_2013 wrote: »
    Thank you. At my doctors visit this week we discussed ways to avoid my same mental health issue again,and one was to keep a weight loss goal out of my mind and to keep a time frame or deadline out as well. But I see now I can have a different style of goal. I feel like they always have some sort of timing involved, but I can try to keep the pressure off and keep myself calm. I enjoy my current lifestyle changes which is huge for me, just need to work on some goals.

    I would definitely make non-weight related goals. I have a couple of different health issues that make losing weight a little harder. So, I focus on non-scale goals. Getting my steps in most days, getting 5 workouts in during the week, aiming to eat 5 servings of fruit/veg each day. I pick things that will benefit my overall health regardless of any impact on my weight. Good luck! You did this before and you can do it again. Be kind to yourself and take your time.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
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    I focused my energies into health, wellness, and fitness and ate and trained for these things knowing that being a healthy weight would eventually be the bi-product of living a healthful life. I don't focus my energies on time or some number on the scale...time is going to pass no matter what so I just try be a little better today than I was yesterday...and I never set a goal weight...I actually think that's one of the worst things people can do...I just did my thing and knew that eventually everything would come out as it should.

    And yes, it does help to give yourself more specific goals, particularly where fitness is concerned. Working out just to workout sucks...training with purpose kicks *kitten*.