Need to lose 75 pounds by tomorrow

echmain
echmain Posts: 103 Member
Could I do it with a Quick-Fix Fast Juice Cleanse?
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Replies

  • yarwell
    yarwell Posts: 10,477 Member
    No, you need a chain saw.
  • LBuehrle8
    LBuehrle8 Posts: 4,044 Member
    BAHAHAHAHA
  • Maxematics
    Maxematics Posts: 2,287 Member
    edited April 2016
    Sorry, not gonna happen in a day, but it can happen in a week. If you drink Shakeology within 45 minutes of exercising and drink clean juice made from cold pressed organic fruits and vegetables, you will lose up to 100 pounds your first week. You have to drink a different color of fruit or vegetable in each juice as well. If you don't follow this or if the fruit and vegetables are not organic, you will gain weight.
  • dwaterfield
    dwaterfield Posts: 34 Member
    Don't listen to these people, they obviously don't know what they're talking about. You just need to take UltraHydroxySlashAndBurnTestoBoostMegaHealth 5000. About 5 pills every hour ought to do it. Luckily they're only $10/pill.

    Oh, and drink lots of water.


  • MommyMeggo
    MommyMeggo Posts: 1,222 Member
    echmain wrote: »
    Could I do it with a Quick-Fix Fast Juice Cleanse?

    Yes you can!!!
  • eldamiano
    eldamiano Posts: 2,667 Member
    You could buy 75 pounds worth of celebrity fitness videos....
  • starwhisperer6
    starwhisperer6 Posts: 402 Member
    On the weekend I am leaving my 12 year old with family while I leave for a girls weekend, I'll be losing about 90 pounds.... and then gaining back 5 or 6 worth of whiskey.
  • Asher_Ethan
    Asher_Ethan Posts: 2,430 Member
    Maybe not that much. You need a more reasonable weight loss goal. Like 50 pounds.
    I literally just did the Dr. Oz cleanse and I literally lost 50 in one day.
    Literally.
  • blues4miles
    blues4miles Posts: 1,481 Member
    Maybe not that much. You need a more reasonable weight loss goal. Like 50 pounds.
    I literally just did the Dr. Oz cleanse and I literally lost 50 in one day.
    Literally.

    I only figuratively lost 50 lbs... I must be doing something wrong.

  • brb_2013
    brb_2013 Posts: 1,197 Member
    Gee, clever spam posts. Sure is nice now that they've made it here. Thought I left those behind on teen chat forums.
  • MissMonicaC4
    MissMonicaC4 Posts: 279 Member
    :D too funny
  • suziecue20
    suziecue20 Posts: 567 Member
    Lose 75lbs overnight - no problem just dream ;)
  • Docbanana2002
    Docbanana2002 Posts: 357 Member
    Do you have a 75 pound child that you could take to someplace exciting and crowded like a zoo or theme park? Very easy to lose 75 pounds in this context.
  • manderson27
    manderson27 Posts: 3,510 Member
    Yes this is absolutely attainable. You need to fast for 6 hours then wrap yourself in seaweed, pour cider vinegar into a bath, get in the bath (don't forget to take a dose of Dr Oz Loozewaitfast pills first though) Soak in the bath for at least an hour. When you get out of the bath eat a lemon sprinkled with cayenne pepper and drink one cup of Dr Oz Loozewaitfast tea and you will have lost at least the amount of weight you would expect if not less.
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
    Yep just put coconut oil in your coffee and count to 100
  • MynameisChester
    MynameisChester Posts: 107 Member
    Not sure if serious, but fat loss( assuming you're targeting fat loss and not glycogen storage or water weight) reasonably occurs at .5 - 2 pounds per week depending on the individual, greater than 2 if you're really overweight or obese. Most importantly, losing pounds doesn't happen linearly which is why it's a good idea to lose weight using time frames. I personally use 3 month time frames to track progress. Good luck!
  • emilyb117
    emilyb117 Posts: 56 Member
    Just cut your arms off
  • ROBOTFOOD
    ROBOTFOOD Posts: 5,527 Member
    -2 legs should do it.
  • sarahkanzalone
    sarahkanzalone Posts: 192 Member
    Eat 2 Antarctic apples, get back ally lipo and you are good to go.... Add some apple cider Vinegar and you are on your way to six pack abs
  • Cameron_1969
    Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,855 Member
    Go to England. Exchange your dollars..then go to a london strip club..
  • robs_ready
    robs_ready Posts: 1,488 Member
    Just cut your arms off

    That's a little drastic... One arm should be enough
  • rdanroth
    rdanroth Posts: 3 Member
    Go to England. Exchange your dollars..then go to a london strip club..

    Topkek bruv
  • soniaf
    soniaf Posts: 106 Member
    Just cut your arms off

    Look, that is just silly. You should cut off one arm and one leg. It would be hard not having any arms.
  • ElegantElle
    ElegantElle Posts: 24 Member
    I have heard of this mummification diet something about removing organs....
  • _incogNEATo_
    _incogNEATo_ Posts: 4,537 Member
    brb_2013 wrote: »
    Gee, clever spam posts. Sure is nice now that they've made it here. Thought I left those behind on teen chat forums.

    faa971f72c075a37c8da986202320b8a4a366019464f5a6d29c5539ea4e4843d.jpg
  • kk_inprogress
    kk_inprogress Posts: 3,077 Member
    soniaf wrote: »
    Just cut your arms off

    Look, that is just silly. You should cut off one arm and one leg. It would be hard not having any arms.

    Just not on the same side, cuz balance.
  • Negative_X
    Negative_X Posts: 296 Member
    thorsmom01 wrote: »
    Yep just put coconut oil in your coffee and count to 100

    :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
  • Lisa__2014
    Lisa__2014 Posts: 3 Member
    Loving this, hilarious!!!
  • Sophialayton
    Sophialayton Posts: 71 Member
    Do you have a 75 pound child that you could take to someplace exciting and crowded like a zoo or theme park? Very easy to lose 75 pounds in this context.

    Lol!!!