Old (well, 65 anyway) with fibromyalgia (chronic pain syndrome) + lots to lose: is there hope? :-)

Options
Sleepyscribbler
Sleepyscribbler Posts: 20 Member
edited April 2016 in Introduce Yourself
Hello there,

Personal info: I'm 65 (am I the oldest here?), very sedentary because of fibromyalgia (or chronic pain as UK doc's seems to prefer to call it) & very frequent migraines (i.e. several days a week) so I spend much of my time in bed, and need to lose weight to bring down my extra-high blood pressure and high cholesterol or the doc won't prescribe any more HRT. The very thought of having to go back to almost constant hot sweat/cold sweat changes every minute or two, all day, plus 'shudders' (like 'someone waking on my grave' — is that just a Scottish saying? — and goose pimples all over while sort of convulsing) while it's happening, plus constant morning nausea (having never had that in two pregnancies) is more than I can tolerate. (Yes, I know that at my age I ought to be past all that. Wish I were. But I know from a medical exam I was still ovulating in my mid fifties, so I guess I'm just a very late starter at the menopause thing.) I know all this makes me sound like a totally self-absorbed, pain-in-the-butt, neurotic freak, but I'm quite stable and cheerful, really! Unfortunately the fibro stuff rules out most kinds of exercise, and my pathological loathing of anything that means I have to get sweaty rules out most of what's left! But I am trying to use my Pilates machine at least every second day (daily if my fibro allows). I like Pilates because I did a lot of dance up to my teens, and it's more about stretching and strengthening than pounding or lifting. Plus you do much of it while lying down: my kind of exercise!

Location: I live right on the coast, just 400 yards from a beautiful pink sand beach, in an old crofters' cottage in a tiny hamlet in the very northernmost part of Scotland's rugged and spectacularly lovely West Coast in an area known as Europe's last wilderness. From every window in the house we can see either the (usually) deserted beach or the waterfall farther up the little glen. Yes, I am extremely lucky, and even luckier in that I know how lucky I am; the Prozac probably helps with that! (So many people have great things in their lives but somehow, I find, don't realise it enough to fully appreciate how lucky they are.) But along with the luck come the usual life stresses. For example my husband (32 years and counting — I hope) is diabetic, so has reduced life expectancy, and is slowly recovering from some very drastic treatment from throat cancer, and my eldest step son died of cancer during my husband's treatment. Otherwise my life is perfect in every way. Not!

Past life: I was a college lecturer for some years (psychology) before branching out on my own as a management consultant and (internationally published, traditional publishers) writer on management issues. Now I do d*#% all, but kid myself I'm really preparing to write a) a novel (yeah, like everyone else) and b) the book on fashion psychology my husband and I have been researching and making copious notes on for over 30 years.

Sorry if you now know more about me (if you were kind enough to plough through it all) than you could possibly wish for. But I'm hoping some kind souls will take pity on this wordy old biddy and help me lose at least 100 pounds. (Is that even possible? Sounds scary!) But I need to do it; my life is, quite literally, at stake if I don't. (An even scarier thought.) But stuff that scary stuff. I want to look better. (You're never too old to be vain, I've found.) I'm past hope of looking good in a swimming costume, but I have hopes of maybe not frightening the tourists on our beach.

All help offered gratefully received and returned. (Even if you're young and beautiful and fit and only need to lose 7lbs, I'll try not to hate you for it!)
«1

Replies

  • RunawayCurves
    RunawayCurves Posts: 688 Member
    Options
    Life throws stuff at us and puts limitations in place but we always have a choice to keep fighting or not. Anything that is within our power to improve quality of life seems worthwhile to me. We only have our own life and our own body, we can not trade them in for more appealing ones. We can choose to make the best of what we have.

    You can lose weight even if not able to exercise, it will be slower but not impossible. As for age none of us get to stay young. I am sure you will feel better without the burden of 100lb excess baggage. I have over 100lb to lose also. Just taking it a day at a time, some good, some bad but doing the best I can.
  • LindaRobertsAntinoro
    Options
    You're not the oldest... it just might be me! I'll be 70 on June 1st. I'm thinking also that's it's just not possible to look "good" in a swimsuit (I love your phrase "swimming costume!") but we can try to make some improvements however! Do your very best EACH and every day to eat well and try to move. Walk as much as you can if it's not too painful. You sound like you have a wonderful attitude even though life surely has thrown you many challenges. Write that book too! Sign me up to purchase a copy once you're published! Let's stay in touch.
  • GaleHawkins
    GaleHawkins Posts: 8,160 Member
    Options
    @Sleepyscribbler no you are not the oldest because I am 65 and am not the oldest. Welcome to MFP forums.

    It sounds like you live in a great place. While my life long issue has been from Ankylosing Spondylitis my experience is somewhat different yet similar. Health roadblocks are hard on both the body and the mind.

    Thankfully 1.5 years ago by trial and error I found a macro that resolved my eating disorder (seriously over eating carbs). When I finally left eating sugars and grains within 30 days my pain level dropped from a subjective 7-8 to 2-3 and still remains well managed by diet only. When two weeks into the Way Of Eating my carb cravings just started to fade fast letting me defeat my eating disorder that was causing much of my pain. Six months in my 40 years of serious IBS resolved and has not returned. I can now get out of get out of the car, movie seats, etc unaided and and I am selling my power mobility chair since I have no need for it now.

    Oh when I found my macro (high fat low carb) it let my brain and hormones get back in control of my weight and maintain without self management other than eat all of my macro that I want. I am down from 250 to 200 for the first time in 22 years have have maintained there for 12 months not counting but I do mentally keep the carbs to <50 grams a day.

    Now I understand my WOE is not the right Way Of Eating for the rest of the world. I just keep reading research and learning all I can about eating for a healthier and longer life. At 65 my health and health markers are better than at age 45.

    Best of success and keep sharing with us.
  • Healthydiner65
    Healthydiner65 Posts: 1,579 Member
    Options
    Soon to be 64 and here every day for mutual support.
  • Sleepyscribbler
    Sleepyscribbler Posts: 20 Member
    edited April 2016
    Options
    Sorry about not replying in proper form, but I'm still finding out how this thing works. If someone could tell be how to do the @ thing I'd be very grateful. I tried copying one person's name then pasting it after an @ but what it then actually pasted was computer gobbledegook. (Would this have shown as gobbledegook or would the app have translated it back to the name?)

    I also can't see how to reply to people directly, one at a time (any help with that, too, gratefully received) so I apologise in advance for this long reply to several people at once rather than replying directly to each one. I'll try to work out how to do it ASAP so as not write such a long post again.

    But, till then: huge thanks to ObesityWarrior — there's a name that speaks of true determination! I can see you'd keep me up to scratch on hitting my macros
    And thanks, too, to LindaRobertsAntinoro — not least for telling me I'm not the oldest person in town, making me feel much less of an outsider
    More thanks due to GaleHawkins — I can see we're going to agree about keeping carbs low, and I'm hoping you can give me some guidance on that
    And more thanks also to IWTBFCIN3 — is that your code name for some secret group that knows the magic words to make you lose weight without trying? If so, can I join your gang? Or are you just struggling as best you can like the rest of us? (I'm guessing it's the latter!)

    In more detail to each:
    ObesityWarrior: I can see that if you add me to your friends (and please do) you're going to be the one who doesn't take any whiney excuses for not hitting my goals. And I'm sure you're right about taking it a day at a time. I find some days it's easy to stay well under my goals whereas other days I find it much harder, and often miss. But I'm choosing to assume that my 'good' (below targets) days balance out the 'bad' ones, as long as there are a reasonable number of those too. And thank you for understanding that I may not be able to exercise as much as people claim is essential to weight loss. I'll try when I can, but if I can't it just means I have to be strict about meeting or exceeding my goals. I'm glad, too, that you're in the 100lb goal category too. It helps to know that others are struggling with the same issues and can give and receive help from a place of mutual understanding.

    LindaRobertsAntiforno: so pleased to know I'm not the oldest one! Yes, do let's stay in touch. It's a great help to know there are others out there facing the particular challenge of trying to lose weight with a metabolism slowed somewhat by the years. And yes, sad to say, I agree I'm well past the possibility of looking good in a swimming costume. (I'm glad you like that term: I'm a Scot, and that's what we called such garments in my youth, and though it can sound a little old fashioned now even here, I still prefer the term probably because I flatter myself did look good in one way back then, in what today would be a (UK) size 8 or 10 (a US 4 or 6?).) And I ruefully accept that a more realistic goal now would be not having children on the beach point and snigger at the fat lady! Joking aside, I'd actually be very content if I lost enough weight to be able to buy a swimming cozzie (the shortened version of the phrase you like) in an ordinary shop, not just shops for the those who are, shall we say, more voluptuous? Those little skirt thingies on those cozzies for 'larger ladies' don't fool anyone, or cover anything either. And I would like to feel rather less embarrassed to disrobe for swimming on our local beach. But I developed a cunning plan for that last year: I bought Lycra (I think US has another name for that ubiquitous stretchy stuff?) capri-length exercise leggings in a snazzy sporty design, and an exercise top to match which between them cover my worst sins and which, together, could double as a swimming costume, being made of the same sort of fabric. And I found a filmy kaftan that very nearly matched them so that I could drift casually, fully-covered, down to the sea's edge before discreetly removing it and plunging (well, okay tip-toeing) into the surf. Brilliant plan, eh? Except that the Scottish weather defeated me. We had a terrible summer, much too cold to swim in the North Atlantic, even if protected from the cold by my internal layer of protection. But I'm hoping for much better weather this year so I can put my cunning plan into action, and, with luck and determination, won't be stretching that Lycra quite so much anyway.

    GaleHawkins: Ankylosing Spondytis must really have added to the challenge of losing weight. I feel quite embarrassed, now, about moaning about my own chronic pain issues. As for the carbs, a do so agree: in the past when I've tried to lose weight, cutting back on the carbs has always worked better for me than calorie counting, and it's my own fault for not bearing that in mind, and going back to the over-eating of everything and not thinking properly about portion control. So eventually, though after quite a long time at a stable weight, I put weight back on. And I'm delighted to hear that your low carbs reduced your pain levels so much: I guess we both know that, after a daily 7-8 on the pain scale, a 2-3 seems like an impossible dream, and though still a pain every day, much easier to tolerate. I'm very pleased for you. And no IBS either! I'm very happy for you to have been able to get rid of that too. (It's not one of my problems, I'm glad to say, unless, that is, I'm under a particularly high level of stress for a prolonged period.) And selling your mobility vehicle as well: you really must feel like a changed man, and a poster 'boy' for your own diet. How low did you have to get your carbs down to for weight loss? I'm struggling a bit with that because to get my carbs down to <30 (which as a former Atkins dieter I worry is a little high, at least to begin a diet with) I am finding it hard to stay below 1,000 calories and also keep my fat levels down on that number of carbs. Normally I'd not be too bothered about fat levels, apart from avoiding trans fats completely. But I have a high cholesterol which, given my spectacularly high blood pressure (which I also need to lose weight to reduce) my doc is keen to get down before I drop dead at her feet next surgery visit. (She may be the one to drop dead of shock if she sees that same mega-high blood pressure result again.) However I have at least started taking some phytosterol tabs which have UK medical acceptance of their claim to knock 15% off your cholesterol levels if you take three a day for three weeks, which sounds well worth a try. So, given all that, do you have any advice on how I should set my macros? I'd be glad to have any you have to offer.

    IWTBFCIN3: another 'oldie' to relate to — excellent! It seems there are more of us than I though, or datred hope. I worried it might be all 20- and 30- somethings who wanted to lose 6-7 pounds to look better in a skimpy bikini, the lucky things! I'd be very glad to think I could count you in as part of my support crew. Thank you.

    Talking of which, I'm aware that I've been the one getting support from you guys, but I'd be very glad to return that in any way I can. So if you'd like to, I'd be delighted if you would add me to your friends list. Unfortunately I haven't (yet) worked out how to out out a friend request, so I'd be doubly glad if you could do whatever it is to add me to your own lists. Meanwhile if knowing there's someone out there who really appreciates that you took the trouble to respond to her first post (and had the stamina to read through it and this one too!), if that alone will help you, you should see the pounds positively committing harakiri next week. Because I do appreciate every one of your responses very much indeed. And if you do add me to your friends lists I'll do everything I can to support, nag, cajole, commiserate or whatever it is you need to help you reach your goals too. Promise.
  • Esme140
    Esme140 Posts: 26 Member
    Options
    Hi Sleepyscribbler,

    I am a bit younger than you but I am not in my 20's, 30's, or 40's. I am in my 50's. Closer to 60 than 50. I am hoping to lose way more than 7 pounds. I joined MFP this morning and just found your post this evening. I am sending you a friend request and look forward to working on reaching our goals together.
  • Sleepyscribbler
    Sleepyscribbler Posts: 20 Member
    Options
    Glad to meet you, Esme. I'll gladly accept that friend request once it pops up.
    I've only been using MFP for just about two weeks, and only consistently over the last week so I'm still groping forward, finding out, or failing to find out, how this community bit works. (I still don't know how to make the quote bit work, or how to send a friend request, so you're one up on me there.) But I'm finding that using the app is making me measure, even if roughly, and record every single thing I eat which I'm finding a real help because as well as opening my eyes to how many calories I must have been consuming before, it's also making me more aware of what I'm eating now. No more conveniently forgetting that piece of toast and butter. And did you know that one little Thorntons chocolate, and probably every other make too, has 50 calories!
  • Lisa732016
    Lisa732016 Posts: 9 Member
    Options
    Hi, Your post has made me smile and sad, I have a chunk of weight to lose to and I can relate to the fibro also. Your location sounds divine, especially as I'm sitting at work in London in an office, and its grey and damp, everything aches and quite frankly being away from it would suit me well.
    Just think drink a little more water and less tea/coffee, eat a little more veggie than carbs (bread, sugary things) and you'll be on your way. My biggest surprise by using this logging system, is that all those little nibbles soon add up. (quite frankly I think its a tad rude but my hips say otherwise :) I'd like to join your friends club and helping reach our goals
  • Esme140
    Esme140 Posts: 26 Member
    Options
    Hi Sleepyscribbler,

    I just realized, in my eagerness to make your acquaintance, I neglected to offer my condolences over the loss of your step-son. Please, let me say now, I am so sorry for your loss. Then, too, your husband's illness...you're really dealing with a lot. I'm glad you found the MFP community and hope you find a measure of comfort here along with encouragement to take good care of you.

    I'm not exactly sure what "quote bit" you're referencing. Perhaps you're looking for the information you can add under "Edit Your Profile? There may be an easier way to make a friend request than the one I've found but here's how I made yours: First I clicked on your name in this forum, which brought up a message screen. Then, I clicked on your name in the screen, which linked me to a page with a link entitled "Add As Friend." Then I included a message and sent the request.

    Speaking of eye-openers: My eyes were just about shocked out of their sockets this morning when I stepped on the scale. Now, I will be counting calories for quite some time, so I'm pretty grateful I found MFP.

    I must admit, I'm not familiar with Thornton's chocolate and that's probably a good thing for me. :smiley:
  • Ringbearer2
    Ringbearer2 Posts: 592 Member
    Options
    Hi! Of course there's hope! You may want to consider joining the group linked below. Many knowledgable helpful people, and many who have had success managing fibro through diet.

    In the meantime, sending a friend request!


    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/394-low-carber-daily-forum-the-lcd-group
  • fairylady1962
    fairylady1962 Posts: 36 Member
    Options
    Hi
    I have fibro, chronic fatique, heart problems etc and can do very little exercise. But the great news is that you can lose the weight just through diet. My weight loss is all diet and very little exercise. You can do this
  • krt2000
    krt2000 Posts: 2 Member
    Options
    Hello there,

    Personal info: I'm 65 (am I the oldest here?), very sedentary because of fibromyalgia (or chronic pain as UK doc's seems to prefer to call it) & very frequent migraines (i.e. several days a week) so I spend much of my time in bed, and need to lose weight to bring down my extra-high blood pressure and high cholesterol or the doc won't prescribe any more HRT. The very thought of having to go back to almost constant hot sweat/cold sweat changes every minute or two, all day, plus 'shudders' (like 'someone waking on my grave' — is that just a Scottish saying? — and goose pimples all over while sort of convulsing) while it's happening, plus constant morning nausea (having never had that in two pregnancies) is more than I can tolerate. (Yes, I know that at my age I ought to be past all that. Wish I were. But I know from a medical exam I was still ovulating in my mid fifties, so I guess I'm just a very late starter at the menopause thing.) I know all this makes me sound like a totally self-absorbed, pain-in-the-butt, neurotic freak, but I'm quite stable and cheerful, really! Unfortunately the fibro stuff rules out most kinds of exercise, and my pathological loathing of anything that means I have to get sweaty rules out most of what's left! But I am trying to use my Pilates machine at least every second day (daily if my fibro allows). I like Pilates because I did a lot of dance up to my teens, and it's more about stretching and strengthening than pounding or lifting. Plus you do much of it while lying down: my kind of exercise!

    Location: I live right on the coast, just 400 yards from a beautiful pink sand beach, in an old crofters' cottage in a tiny hamlet in the very northernmost part of Scotland's rugged and spectacularly lovely West Coast in an area known as Europe's last wilderness. From every window in the house we can see either the (usually) deserted beach or the waterfall farther up the little glen. Yes, I am extremely lucky, and even luckier in that I know how lucky I am; the Prozac probably helps with that! (So many people have great things in their lives but somehow, I find, don't realise it enough to fully appreciate how lucky they are.) But along with the luck come the usual life stresses. For example my husband (32 years and counting — I hope) is diabetic, so has reduced life expectancy, and is slowly recovering from some very drastic treatment from throat cancer, and my eldest step son died of cancer during my husband's treatment. Otherwise my life is perfect in every way. Not!

    Past life: I was a college lecturer for some years (psychology) before branching out on my own as a management consultant and (internationally published, traditional publishers) writer on management issues. Now I do d*#% all, but kid myself I'm really preparing to write a) a novel (yeah, like everyone else) and b) the book on fashion psychology my husband and I have been researching and making copious notes on for over 30 years.

    Sorry if you now know more about me (if you were kind enough to plough through it all) than you could possibly wish for. But I'm hoping some kind souls will take pity on this wordy old biddy and help me lose at least 100 pounds. (Is that even possible? Sounds scary!) But I need to do it; my life is, quite literally, at stake if I don't. (An even scarier thought.) But stuff that scary stuff. I want to look better. (You're never too old to be vain, I've found.) I'm past hope of looking good in a swimming costume, but I have hopes of maybe not frightening the tourists on our beach.

    All help offered gratefully received and returned. (Even if you're young and beautiful and fit and only need to lose 7lbs, I'll try not to hate you for it!)

  • luluinca
    luluinca Posts: 2,899 Member
    Options
    I'll be 66 tomorrow and have been here since September of 2013. Lost 70 lbs and am maintaining now although I might want to lose another 5 this year. I'm more into fitness than weight loss right now though.

    I started this journey with 3 herniated discs and had just come off a serious illness that nearly killed me. If I can do it you can!

    Feel free to friend me, any of you, I'm active here and log everyday while supporting my friends as much as possible!

    Age is just a number and you're never too old to turn things around!
  • krt2000
    krt2000 Posts: 2 Member
    Options
    Good morning sleepy scribbler,
    I have fibromyalgia, chronic pain syndrome, and several other issues. 14 years ago I was hit by a drunk driver and he rolled my truck. Since then it's been multiple surgeries and a lot of weight gain.
    I just signed up on here today and like you I'm sure I will need that extra push from others. It's easier to stay in bed and try to get comfortable than to get out of the bed and try to be active. I know all the Doctor's say to get up and move is the thing for you, but telling my body that is a whole different story.
    Like I said I'm new to this app so I'm still trying to figure it out. If you have any tips or tricks to share that would be great.
    I'm not sure how to add a friend so if you could add me that would be great.
  • Esme140
    Esme140 Posts: 26 Member
    Options
    Esme140 wrote: »
    Hi Sleepyscribbler,

    I'm not exactly sure what "quote bit" you're referencing.

    Laughing at myself for not even seeing the Quote tool before. We'll figure this all out together, right?
  • Sleepyscribbler
    Sleepyscribbler Posts: 20 Member
    Options
    krt2000 wrote: »
    It's easier to stay in bed and try to get comfortable than to get out of the bed and try to be active. I know all the Doctor's say to get up and move is the thing for you, but telling my body that is a whole different story.
    Like I said I'm new to this app so I'm still trying to figure it out. If you have any tips or tricks to share that would be great.
    I'm not sure how to add a friend so if you could add me that would be great.

    Oh, I know how hard it can be to drag your aching body out of bed when it hurts and you've just managed to find a way to lie so it hurts less, for a little while, at least. As for doctors, I wonder how many of those giving that advice have ever been in a position to need it? It must seem obvious to them that getting up and being more active is the 'answer', and it probably would be a good thing to do, but I don't think they often realise just how hard that can be. Even on good days I tend to want to stay in bed the way you do when recovering from an illness: the worst may be gone but you're just so weakened and tired by it that you need a recovery day, or two.
    I can't offer much in the way of tips about that other than I try not to beat myself up when I can't do much, but try also not to be too 'lazy' and do stuff when I can, even if it's just a wander round the garden for a few minutes. My (cancer-recovering diabetic) husband and I have a pact: when we can't (do much) we don't, but when we can, we do.

    As for adding you as a friend, if only I knew how!

    Can anyone here tell us how to go about adding a friend?

    There seems to be a way to send a message: is that the same thing?

    All too confusing for my aging and (painkiller) drug-addled brain.
  • Sleepyscribbler
    Sleepyscribbler Posts: 20 Member
    Options
    Esme140 wrote: »
    Esme140 wrote: »
    Hi Sleepyscribbler,

    I'm not exactly sure what "quote bit" you're referencing.

    Laughing at myself for not even seeing the Quote tool before. We'll figure this all out together, right?

    Ooooh! I've worked out how the quote thing works: you tap on the "Quote thingy below the post you want to quote and it pastes it into a box to type into. All very simple. Except that on my iPad the box with the quote pasted in was invisibly below other messages so it took me a while to work out what was going on.

    (I had to grin at the bit about not seeing the Quote tool; I saw it but had no idea how to use it! Yes, together we will work this out. Er … any idea how to add someone as a friend yet?)
  • Sleepyscribbler
    Sleepyscribbler Posts: 20 Member
    Options
    Hi
    I have fibro, chronic fatique, heart problems etc and can do very little exercise. But the great news is that you can lose the weight just through diet. My weight loss is all diet and very little exercise. You can do this

    Yes, I'm beginning to discover (via this app) just how few calories you can actually lose from exercising, however helpful and healthy it may be. Which is encouraging, and makes me feel less guilty about not training for the half marathon.
  • Esme140
    Esme140 Posts: 26 Member
    Options
    krt2000 wrote: »

    Can anyone here tell us how to go about adding a friend?

    Hi,

    Um yeah, I’m still just clicking on a blue linked username under the photo image in the discussion forum, which takes me to a message screen, where I click on the username again, which takes me to their profile page, where the “Add as Friend” button link is located. It does seem a bit much but that’s all I’ve figured out so far.

    I’m just happy I learned how to bookmark the discussions I want to follow. It took me awhile to find this one again and once I realized there’s GOT to be an easier way then scrolling through all the discussions, then I saw the bookmark star. Now I can honestly say, I’m not blind. I see things…

  • Shellj68
    Shellj68 Posts: 4 Member
    Options
    Glad to meet you, Esme. I'll gladly accept that friend request once it pops up.
    I've only been using MFP for just about two weeks, and only consistently over the last week so I'm still groping forward, finding out, or failing to find out, how this community bit works. (I still don't know how to make the quote bit work, or how to send a friend request, so you're one up on me there.) But I'm finding that using the app is making me measure, even if roughly, and record every single thing I eat which I'm finding a real help because as well as opening my eyes to how many calories I must have been consuming before, it's also making me more aware of what I'm eating now. No more conveniently forgetting that piece of toast and butter. And did you know that one little Thorntons chocolate, and probably every other make too, has 50 calories!