Social life since starting diet

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youngandaspiringxo
youngandaspiringxo Posts: 74 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Anyone else feel like they don't have much of a social life now that they're trying to lose weight? All my friends want to do is go out to eat or for drinks. I always have to say no. I know there are healthier options at restaurants but I just don't like someone else preparing my food while I'm trying to lose weight. I'm bummed about it but I really don't wanna ruin this for myself. Anyone else struggling with this?
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  • Lewisg51
    Lewisg51 Posts: 220 Member
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    Yeah always, can't go for drinks, meals or anywhere and everyone seems to like you that bit less when dieting, especially when you don't take part in stuff because of it.
  • endlessfall16
    endlessfall16 Posts: 932 Member
    edited April 2016
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    No. I recognized this issue very early on and decided to stay unchanged.

    I keep going out to eat with friends and family members. I do not hold back at all.

    The rationalization is that these meals are still very infrequent (ie mainly on weekend for me). The scale usually shows 1 to 2 lbs gain on Monday.

    I have all the weekdays to offset everything. I lost 8.5 lbs in last 5 weeks!
  • chimaerandi
    chimaerandi Posts: 153 Member
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    I've lost 68 pounds continuing to go out to eat and drink and such--I suggest weekly calorie counts v. daily for that.

    I mean, you certainly don't HAVE to, but I knew early on that I needed this to be something maintainable, and for me, not going out with friends a couple times a month is not sustainable.

    I do, however, have dinner parties! I do the cooking. That helps.
  • sunnybeaches105
    sunnybeaches105 Posts: 2,831 Member
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    Don't do that to yourself. You're going to drive yourself batty and likely want to rage quit at some point (most anyone would). Try to cut down on the going out, but allow yourself to go out with friends once or twice a week. In my personal experince, it helps to figure out what you want to eat in advance if you can determine the restaurant you are going to visit (or if there are 2-3 possibilities, look at all of them and figure out some options). If that goes out the window because your friends want to go somewhere else, then just order something simple on the menu, the chicken, steak or a burger without a bun and a salad. As for drinks, either fit them into your calorie goal or ask the bartender for soda water and lime.

    I'd also suggest that you not talk about the fact that you're on a diet or cutting back on drinks. Just do it and not talk about it. It will skip all of the "oh, come on" talk that often follows.
  • VintageFeline
    VintageFeline Posts: 6,771 Member
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    Yeah 47lbs down so far and haven't changed my eating habits all that much aside from portion sizes and some choices. But I still regularly have take out and went out for brunch for a birthday today which included delicious delicious cake. I just ate light the rest of the day and it still fits within my goals. My losses have only slowed when I've done so intentionally, during diet breaks when I have no deficit or at Christmas when I took a few days off completely and gained a little.

    If you don't learn how to manage your weight within the context of your life then you're going to have a hard time sustaining the losses and then maintaining. Working out how to navigate your social life is part of the learning curve.
  • Negative_X
    Negative_X Posts: 296 Member
    edited April 2016
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    IIFYM & CICO... my life improved immensely once I adopted these philosophies and I never looked back. Gotta still strike a life balance w/ everything otherwise you'll just be miserable... and if you're miserable, what are the chances you're going to continue anything in the long term?

    Following the above, I went from 250lbs to 165lbs at my lightest and have maintained a happy, fit, healthy & fun lifestyle ever since.
  • earlnabby
    earlnabby Posts: 8,171 Member
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    My social life increased.
  • Scamd83
    Scamd83 Posts: 808 Member
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    I'm not a sociable person, dieting has made zero difference to my social life.
  • nuttynanners
    nuttynanners Posts: 249 Member
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    Yes. Every time I am losing weight, I see my friends less often. My friends like to drink, drink, drink... and on the day after, I get so hungover that I can't exercise or eat as healthily as usual. And then I am stuck playing catch-up for two or three days! Occasionally I will go out with them and limit myself to 1-2 drinks, or sticking to vodka/soda water, or not eating anything from a foodtruck, or ordering a bunless burger or salad at a restaurant, etc... but it's easier for me just to not go.

    If I plan it into my day ahead of time, that helps. I can allot 500-800 calories for going out or whatever. But on a day like today, when I just got home from a long day at work, and I am only going to have 500 more calories for dinner... it's like... yeah, I should just stay home. If I go, I'll regret the extra calories... or worse, I'll go out and not drink and be boring!

    So yeah, I feel you. The struggle is real.
  • scorpiophoenix
    scorpiophoenix Posts: 222 Member
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    Not been a problem for me. Most places have the calorie counts on their websites and after a while you learn what to order and how to make it fit into your day/week. Can totally lose weight and have a social life. It's quite liberating and empowering. Sure there's a chance what you actually eat will be a little more or less than what's listed, but it's not going to be that big a deal. Lost 45lbs, been maintaining for about a year - ate out 4-6 days a week this whole time.
  • koreangurl
    koreangurl Posts: 59 Member
    edited April 2016
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    Your social life will increase once you lose the weight and end up in shape. This is like adults who don't party on the weekends and instead focus on their school or career. Down the road it is the person who sacrificed their time that ends up with the most rewards. If you really care about being social then your best bet is to find a balance. Every minute your hanging out their is someone who is doing something productive and will reap the benefits later.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,426 Member
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    Nothing has really changed for me. I only eat out one meal once a week because it costs too much to eat out more than that. Once a week isn't too much. I look up nutritional information in advance. I've learned to make decent choices. I don't get together with friends every day.

    Maybe invite your friends over and cook for them or cook together if you have to get together a lot.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
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    No, I don't let food dictate the fun I have. If I go out to a restaurant, I order either lighter fare options or a save up calories for a regular menu item. I look up fast food and restaurant nutrition info beforehand if I know where I'm going. If I'm going to a party, I try to be mindful, have a small piece of birthday cake, etc, I log it and move on. I'm not about to give up my life over something as silly as food. Life too short to keep saying "I can't eat that, I'm on a diet". Pfft, whatever. In the grand scheme of things, even if I go over my calories, or even my maintenance calories, it's not like I'm going to gain the 78 lbs I've lost back. It's only when you treat 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year like a party that you run into problems.
  • dbkyser
    dbkyser Posts: 612 Member
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    I feel your pain. There comes a point where you do have to give up some of these things, at least temporarily. I got to the point where I would work all week to take off the weekend weight, not worth it to me. I still go out a few times a week to eat but make it fit in my calories. I can not drink though, with alcohol comes poor choices in food. Not saying I will give alcohol up for good, but right now weight loss is going so much better with out it.
  • youngandaspiringxo
    youngandaspiringxo Posts: 74 Member
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    Thanks guys. I guess I just have to find a good balance. But last night they wanted to go out for tacos and all I was thinking was bottomless chips and margaritas. Sigh.
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,573 Member
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    Yeah, find a balance. I honestly prefer to eat my meals alone just because I enjoy them better and I can control what goes in and have room for dessert.
    youngandaspiringxo wrote: »
    Thanks guys. I guess I just have to find a good balance. But last night they wanted to go out for tacos and all I was thinking was bottomless chips and margaritas. Sigh.

    I went out for Mexican last night with a friend. I've been at this a long time and have a high day planned every week, so I KNEW I could eat the food and almost get whatever I wanted. But it was a spur of the moment thing and I already had my little treats and meals planned out for the evening. Anyway, I went. A great thing to order is Ceviche! I of course did not do well with the bottomless chips though lol. But, I'm in a deficit for the week so that's all that matters.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,704 Member
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    I go out with friends and family all the time. I don't drink and am the DD (designated driver) as well as the overseer making sure no one gets hurt or overboard from drinking. And food.................eat what you like, just don't over eat.
    One doesn't have to avoid friends and parties. Think about it, when you get to goal, are you still going to do that?

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
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    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,867 Member
    edited April 2016
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    Nah...most of my friends are into the same stuff I'm into. Sure, we'll go out and eat and have some drinks...but we're also likely to have been out on a 6 hour hike or something beforehand...we're all pretty active and fitness oriented so celebrating each other's companionship with food and good drink tends to not really be an issue.

    That said, we're usually at each other's houses and usually grilling and whatnot...we all tend to eat pretty healthy, so the food we make tends to be pretty healthy...and also delicious.
  • Afura
    Afura Posts: 2,054 Member
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    Scamd83 wrote: »
    I'm not a sociable person, dieting has made zero difference to my social life.
    I go to the grocery store more often, is that being social?
  • Charlot4444
    Charlot4444 Posts: 170 Member
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    Had all you can eat sushi last night.. .and wine. Go out about 4 times a week (sometimes a lunch, sometimes dinner with drinks) I also use a weekly deficit. I mean my weight loss is not staggering fast, but this is just a journey and this is how I'm going to be.. forever I hope. I don't want to regain the weight so now is how I learn to do all the things I love while some weeks only losing .5 lb (or maintain even) and others losing 1.5, and then some weeks I get a whoosh (love whoosh weeks).

    Some of my friends drink a lot, but I don't need to (or want to). And some of them order the highest calorie dish, and if I want to I do, but usually I prefer the less heavy things. I say prepare and learn how you want to be for life so that when you are at your goal weight, you don't pile the weight back on thinking.. FINALLY I can do all my old stuff again.

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