Unicorns: Rare, but real. VERY real.

emtjmac
emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
edited November 7 in Chit-Chat
People say that rare things don't happen but I am here to tell you that rare things DO happen and rare things, objects and animals CAN be found if you believe in a dream. Here is a secret only TWO people in the world even know right now:

My buddy Randy has a unicorn in his basement.

I know what you're thinking, but he won't let me take pictures of it, in fact, he won't even let me see it! He did say I could touch it once and he made me wear a blindfold before taking me down into the basement (usually off-limits but this was a one time thing and I have best friend privileges). I told him that it just felt like a stuffed moose or something but he said that it was alive and totally seriously a unicorn and I believe him because he is always serious and he has a double black belt in Karate from Kyle Pozzi's Self Defense Studios so he knows that honor comes first. Here is a picture of Randy for reference. Please don't contact him because he's my best friend and he doesn't have time for more friends. He just doesn't.

2h3racz.jpg

BELIEVE in a DREAM and a DREAM can be REAL! Thank you, I hope that I inspired you with this TRUE story.
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Replies

  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
    Anyone that can pull off a mullet and a mustache must have a unicorn. They just have to.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    Anyone that can pull off a mullet and a mustache must have a unicorn. They just have to.

    You are correct about Randy. He can pull off anything he puts his mind to. His IQ is 172 and he measured it using the best IQ test on his computer (internet).
  • Saucy_lil_Minx
    Saucy_lil_Minx Posts: 3,302 Member
    According to my 10 year old son... I smell Like unicorn poop!! which he says smells like Candy, and Flowers!!!

    So he has seen, and smelled a unicorn!!

    I believe!!! I totally believe!

    Mullet Man!
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    Please spread this information to all your friends. The truth WILL be known.
  • Saucy_lil_Minx
    Saucy_lil_Minx Posts: 3,302 Member
    Please spread this information to all your friends. The truth WILL be known.

    Mission accept Agent EMT!!
  • ilyahna2014
    ilyahna2014 Posts: 45
    I KNEW it!
  • paulawatkins1974
    paulawatkins1974 Posts: 720 Member
    Anyone that can pull off a mullet and a mustache must have a unicorn. They just have to.
    I think he IS the unicorn
  • paulawatkins1974
    paulawatkins1974 Posts: 720 Member
    i like that man. he handsome. i like to be wife of him.
    lol
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    OK guys, you are all my friends now. It's time for ANOTHER secret. Randy's name is not really Randy. Randy's name is really Vladislav. He prefers I call him Randy because it sounds WAY more American and he wants people (Americans) to accept him. I think Randy is a kick-*kitten* name too. He sounds VERY American when he talks. His voice is like a cross between Fabio and Dennis Quaid.
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    i like that man. he handsome. i like to be wife of him.

    Randy is single and available. Please understand though that he is very, very busy and only a true tigress could tame his wild heart. Are you up to the challenge?
  • Saucy_lil_Minx
    Saucy_lil_Minx Posts: 3,302 Member
    OK guys, you are all my friends now. It's time for ANOTHER secret. Randy's name is not really Randy. Randy's name is really Vladislav. He prefers I call him Randy because it sounds WAY more American and he wants people (Americans) to accept him. I think Randy is a kick-*kitten* name too. He sounds VERY American when he talks. His voice is like a cross between Fabio and Dennis Quaid.

    So he's a dbl agent? Is he trying to trick us into giving up all the secrets?
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    OK guys, you are all my friends now. It's time for ANOTHER secret. Randy's name is not really Randy. Randy's name is really Vladislav. He prefers I call him Randy because it sounds WAY more American and he wants people (Americans) to accept him. I think Randy is a kick-*kitten* name too. He sounds VERY American when he talks. His voice is like a cross between Fabio and Dennis Quaid.

    So he's a dbl agent? Is he trying to trick us into giving up all the secrets?

    OK, maybe Randy wasn't born in America but he bleeds red, white and blue. He even knitted an American flag horse blanket for the unicorn out of real knitting stuff. Randy doesn't mess around.
  • Saucy_lil_Minx
    Saucy_lil_Minx Posts: 3,302 Member
    OK guys, you are all my friends now. It's time for ANOTHER secret. Randy's name is not really Randy. Randy's name is really Vladislav. He prefers I call him Randy because it sounds WAY more American and he wants people (Americans) to accept him. I think Randy is a kick-*kitten* name too. He sounds VERY American when he talks. His voice is like a cross between Fabio and Dennis Quaid.

    So he's a dbl agent? Is he trying to trick us into giving up all the secrets?

    OK, maybe Randy wasn't born in America but he bleeds red, white and blue. He even knitted an American flag horse blanket for the unicorn out of real knitting stuff. Randy doesn't mess around.


    Pheww! Oh good!
  • _Tink_
    _Tink_ Posts: 3,845 Member
    Idk...he kinda reminds me of a young Derp Diggler....
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    Fun Fact: Randy can eat whatever he wants and he NEVER gains weight. I once saw him eat two packs of hot dogs without even cooking them. Randy is invincible.
  • dunnodunno
    dunnodunno Posts: 2,290 Member
    People say that rare things don't happen but I am here to tell you that rare things DO happen and rare things, objects and animals CAN be found if you believe in a dream. Here is a secret only TWO people in the world even know right now:

    My buddy Randy has a unicorn in his basement.

    I know what you're thinking, but he won't let me take pictures of it, in fact, he won't even let me see it! He did say I could touch it once and he made me wear a blindfold before taking me down into the basement (usually off-limits but this was a one time thing and I have best friend privileges). I told him that it just felt like a stuffed moose or something but he said that it was alive and totally seriously a unicorn and I believe him because he is always serious and he has a double black belt in Karate from Kyle Pozzi's Self Defense Studios so he knows that honor comes first. Here is a picture of Randy for reference. Please don't contact him because he's my best friend and he doesn't have time for more friends. He just doesn't.

    2h3racz.jpg

    BELIEVE in a DREAM and a DREAM can be REAL! Thank you, I hope that I inspired you with this TRUE story.

    Is that Charlie Sheen's long lost brother?
  • kinkyslinky16
    kinkyslinky16 Posts: 1,469 Member
    Your post has just made my day :drinker:
  • lookin4gains
    lookin4gains Posts: 1,761 Member
    Too much awesomeness on this thread. Mind blown.
  • La_Malfaisante
    La_Malfaisante Posts: 1,509 Member
    Fun Fact: Randy can eat whatever he wants and he NEVER gains weight. I once saw him eat two packs of hot dogs without even cooking them. Randy is invincible.

    iolylf.gif
  • JD2006
    JD2006 Posts: 791 Member
    Did you smell your hand after touching the unicorn? Because they have a very distinct smell.
  • heathl39
    heathl39 Posts: 46
    This is ridiculously funny! I am giggling as I write this!!
    The truth is out there!LOL
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    Did you smell your hand after touching the unicorn? Because they have a very distinct smell.

    No, I didn't! What do they smell like?!
  • Go_Mizzou99
    Go_Mizzou99 Posts: 2,628 Member
    Unicorns smell like rainbows. This is true.

    A friend on mine named Vladislav (he likes to go by Randy), opened his basement door and asked me what I smelled...I said rainbows. I have never smelled rainbows before but that was the first thought that popped into my head. Randy told me that's exactly what he smelled too. That's when he told me he had a unicorn in the basement.
  • BurntCoffee
    BurntCoffee Posts: 234 Member
    I once saw an ad online for a unicorn but it turned out to be a donkey. Stupid donkeys.
  • JD2006
    JD2006 Posts: 791 Member
    Unicorns actually smell like straightjackets and valium
  • thesupremeforce
    thesupremeforce Posts: 1,206 Member
    I_3bda3f_247077.jpg

    Was it this unicorn? This one kept texting me inappropriate pictures the other night.
  • BurntCoffee
    BurntCoffee Posts: 234 Member
    I_3bda3f_247077.jpg

    Was it this unicorn? This one kept texting me inappropriate pictures the other night.

    I think we are both being punked. You get a Rhino and I get a Donkey. Maybe they really are a myth. Unicorns never seem to be the beautiful creatures people claim them to be. At least you found out before you got excited about the prospect of finding the elusive unicorn.
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    Unicorns actually smell like straightjackets and valium

    That's so crazy you say that! That's just what Randy's grandma smells like. She always gives me licorice.
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    Randy wishes all of you to know he is still kickin' it (American style) with the unicorn.
This discussion has been closed.

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