Do you tell the the truth?

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2

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  • ladyreva78
    ladyreva78 Posts: 4,080 Member
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    I only make a comment if it's requested. Otherwise, I just leave it be and assume they are adult enough to know what they are doing or ask for help if they need it.
  • celadontea
    celadontea Posts: 335 Member
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    You can't blame your friends when it's coded directly into My Fitness Pal that an elliptical burns almost 900 calories per hour. It's stuff like that to blame that estimates around a few HUNDRED calories higher than what's the real norm. If I saw someone logging it every day I might make a comment such as, "How fast are you going? I'm 200 or so pounds and only burn 500/600 calories per hour covering this much distance with this much resistance, using a heart rate monitor."
  • distinctlybeautiful
    distinctlybeautiful Posts: 1,041 Member
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    I try not to offer advice where it's not wanted. It's never been well-received in the past. I did recently post a status about how I hate that MFP encourages people to come in under goal and how I think MFP shouldn't let people's diaries post if their net calories are under 1200. That didn't get a very good response! I just don't hit "like" on stuff I don't want to support. I recently took someone off my list because she kept asking for help and advice about raising net intake but didn't appear to be following through on any of it, leaving the net calories under 1000 almost every day. So I guess long story short, I keep it to myself unless asked, but I might I unfriend people depending how I feel.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,268 Member
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    I keep it shut unless asked and even then there is the chance people will get mad or upset.

    For example I have a friend on here and irl and she is under eating and not being healthy...20lbs to lose and she is down 1/2lb appx every 2 days...sometimes more...I have made broad statements around her but never directly to her as I have tried prior and people either A) don't want to hear it B)don't believe it. C) take offense and say things like "you're just jealous I am losing faster than you"...
  • AmazonMayan
    AmazonMayan Posts: 1,168 Member
    edited May 2016
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    distinctlybeautiful wrote: »
    I try not to offer advice where it's not wanted. It's never been well-received in the past. I did recently post a status about how I hate that MFP encourages people to come in under goal and how I think MFP shouldn't let people's diaries post if their net calories are under 1200. That didn't get a very good response! I just don't hit "like" on stuff I don't want to support. I recently took someone off my list because she kept asking for help and advice about raising net intake but didn't appear to be following through on any of it, leaving the net calories under 1000 almost every day. So I guess long story short, I keep it to myself unless asked, but I might I unfriend people depending how I feel.

    I hate the under goal announcement too. I've seen so many cheering coming under and then scolding someone if they went over.

    The person only went over a few calories and she got all kinds of unsolicited advice on how to do better the next day. Even if she were over by more or a lot, why scold? She's logging. She might have had a special day or bad day, etc. (If over by a lot). Way to knock someone down and possibly contribute to undereating/eating disorders.

    I did have someone who was drastically over estimating elliptical calories burned - over 1000 for 30 minutes but I didn't say anything. The person wasn't asking for advice and was posting losses.
  • viren19890
    viren19890 Posts: 778 Member
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    You guys are very sensitive. I really don't care what they think. I will voice my concerns especially if they are massively under-eating. Out of 3 people who I've messaged privately regarding their probable eating disorder 2 have deleted me and 1 became a very good friend of mine. Then there were other 2 who deleted me because I voiced my concerns over their status lol

    I'm here to support, if you added me to flirt then too bad because if you are casual enough to flirt you should also be casual enough to take constructive criticism.

    We all make up what is known as a community. So if they get offended, let em be. If they delete you, let it be.

    Everyone comes in our life for a season, reason or a lifetime. Be humble and voice your concerns, you might learn that you are wrong or you might make a new friend and worse comes to worse they'll delete you and you might not be mentioned in their Oscar winning speech.

  • Tedebearduff
    Tedebearduff Posts: 1,155 Member
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    Kittenisspooky wrote: »
    When you have friends on here who way way underestimates their daily calories eaten and way way over estimates their workouts do you tell them or just congratulate them on being " under" their goal?

    I do not mean this in a catty way but if you genuinely care for the person. Do you think they are just enjoying being delusional or do you think you should say something?

    Years ago I use to comment, I had someone log "reading" , "driving" this was all before there where 1000 fit devices and HRM's of course. Anyways it never went over well and people would always be defensive and I'd be the bad guy of course.

    Heart was in the right place in my mind, trying to inform people that reading isn't exercise and neither is driving, but I would get rebuttals and they had some crazy logic to it.

    I never really check peoples diary logs, I just click "like" on them all because it means people are making an effort to track what they eat. I never go into someones diary unless they ask me to and frankly I don't have the time for something like that. Also there would be no way for me to verify what they did or did not eat
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,268 Member
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    viren19890 wrote: »
    You guys are very sensitive. I really don't care what they think. I will voice my concerns especially if they are massively under-eating. Out of 3 people who I've messaged privately regarding their probable eating disorder 2 have deleted me and 1 became a very good friend of mine. Then there were other 2 who deleted me because I voiced my concerns over their status lol

    I'm here to support, if you added me to flirt then too bad because if you are casual enough to flirt you should also be casual enough to take constructive criticism.

    We all make up what is known as a community. So if they get offended, let em be. If they delete you, let it be.

    Everyone comes in our life for a season, reason or a lifetime. Be humble and voice your concerns, you might learn that you are wrong or you might make a new friend and worse comes to worse they'll delete you and you might not be mentioned in their Oscar winning speech.

    mine isn't from sensitivity mine is from not giving a crap.

    I don't care what they think..or say. I just know that I set an example and post things on my profile and if they are interested and actually care about themselves they will take heed.

    Otherwise they can float.

    IE the ones who get offended when I tell them they are losing too fast and losing muscle that get ticked whatever...have at if you want to be soft and squishy but 120lbs...

    I've tried to help and get slapped for it so now I focus on my priority which is me and if others want my advice they can ask and if they get put off by it don't ask again.

    call me jaded but been there done that....
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 27,952 Member
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    viren19890 wrote: »
    Aren't you on friend list to "Support" them ? observing silence is "supporting" ?

    I've always inboxed them -suggesting what's good based on how much I know. So far I've had three people massively under-eating-it's just painful to watch 20 likes on massive under-eating sprees.

    and so far I've been deleted by 2 people. YAY!

    This is the reason why I try to maintain a small friends list-so I can actually check on them. If a "friend" on my list doesn't even reply back to comment or is getting 30-40 likes - I delete em because well clearly they have enough "support" and I rather save my energy and effort.

    Ya, I have a few people in my FL I know are undereaters from their threads here. Because I never look at diaries unless prompted to, I've stopped liking everyone's diary completion.

    I should probably prune my FL into a manageable size.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 27,952 Member
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    celadontea wrote: »
    You can't blame your friends when it's coded directly into My Fitness Pal that an elliptical burns almost 900 calories per hour. It's stuff like that to blame that estimates around a few HUNDRED calories higher than what's the real norm. If I saw someone logging it every day I might make a comment such as, "How fast are you going? I'm 200 or so pounds and only burn 500/600 calories per hour covering this much distance with this much resistance, using a heart rate monitor."

    Ya, I get 349 calories an hour for gardening, and this time of year I garden a LOT. However, I don't eat all those calories back. I often leave hundreds of calories on the table.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,268 Member
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    celadontea wrote: »
    You can't blame your friends when it's coded directly into My Fitness Pal that an elliptical burns almost 900 calories per hour. It's stuff like that to blame that estimates around a few HUNDRED calories higher than what's the real norm. If I saw someone logging it every day I might make a comment such as, "How fast are you going? I'm 200 or so pounds and only burn 500/600 calories per hour covering this much distance with this much resistance, using a heart rate monitor."

    common sense has to come into play in this instance.

  • brb_2013
    brb_2013 Posts: 1,197 Member
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    The way I see it, we may be "friends" but in the end I know I don't want unsolicited comments and they probably don't either. We are all here to do our best, unless they're asking "OMG WHY AM I NOT LOSING WEIGHT WAAAAAAAHHHHHH" all the time and behaving in an obviously unhelpful way, perhaps I'd say something politely.
  • Stevo_Ra
    Stevo_Ra Posts: 21 Member
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    You really cant go with what MFP or the internet says in terms of calorie burn. I always use my heart rate monitor and never eat the calories back anyway. I'd bet that's the biggest reason folk don't lose. I burn roughly three quarters of what MFP says I should on most activates.
  • LivingtheLeanDream
    LivingtheLeanDream Posts: 13,342 Member
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    I don't mention it because I don't want to be all judgey but I DO think often that they are underestimating and fooling themselves ultimately and its usually why they're not having weight loss.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,268 Member
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    Stevo_Ra wrote: »
    You really cant go with what MFP or the internet says in terms of calorie burn. I always use my heart rate monitor and never eat the calories back anyway. I'd bet that's the biggest reason folk don't lose. I burn roughly three quarters of what MFP says I should on most activates.

    MFP is setup to eat back exercise calories tho.

    When I got here back in 2013 I always ate them all back...and I lost what I wanted.

    The biggest reason people don't lose is under estimating intake and over estimating burns.

    Lots of times people think "effort" means they burned a lot when in fact "effort" has nothing to do with it.

    HR monitors are good for certain things...steady state cardio with a chest straps...I can't use one for my lifting.
  • Gamliela
    Gamliela Posts: 2,468 Member
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    I would say something if I know the right answer and they have asked for advice here. I think thats why mfp works well to help people lose weight.
  • dwulet130
    dwulet130 Posts: 108 Member
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    I usually don't say anything unless they ask, but sometimes i'll make a general post about "wow, MFP exercise calories are sure off. 500 for 15 minutes of cleaning?" Or if one person is doing it every day, maybe a "wow, that's quite the workout. Did you run a marathon lol?"
  • Meganthedogmom
    Meganthedogmom Posts: 1,639 Member
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    I don't say anything unless asked as it's not my business, but I don't "like" it either when they are obviously double dipping on exercise calories or whatever it may be. It's their journey, not mine.

    I have, however, had a few girls on my friends list in the past who would be proud of only eating 600 calories a day. After discovering this and deleting them, I learned to always check people's diaries before "liking" or congratulating them for being under their calorie goal.

    Also, I have some friends who are bulking, so "liking" when they lose weight would be kinda stupid.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
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    Depends on my mood LOL. But if it's someone who's been losing steadily, I won't say anything, I figure that what they are doing works, even if it's not accurate.

    If they complain about not losing or binging or something though, I'll check their diary and comment.
  • dragon_girl26
    dragon_girl26 Posts: 2,187 Member
    edited May 2016
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    My calorie burns tend to show up as over inflated because I sync my Polar watch info with MFP, and I know it's a bit off. Maybe other people do the same thing..just a thought if their calorie burns seem high. I do TDEE minus 20%, though, so I don't worry about my calorie burns so much. I just use it as a way to record exercise time more than anything.

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