Alone but not single

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  • DearestWinter
    DearestWinter Posts: 595 Member
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    kristylovesyou14 wrote: »
    Mainly money or the fact that I don't do everything he tells me to

    This is controlling behavior. Add me to the list of concerned people on this thread.
  • MissusMoon
    MissusMoon Posts: 1,900 Member
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    Given concerns that I share with others, I'm just going leave this here: http://www.thehotline.org/
  • kristylovesyou14
    kristylovesyou14 Posts: 63 Member
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    No abuse but he is kind of controlling I will be fine believe me I have been there before and won't let it happen again
  • blairrob12
    blairrob12 Posts: 215 Member
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    Life is much to short to be unhappy. And as far as your daughter goes, I'm speaking from experience, it's much harder on her having you fighting all the time. She will be happier if you're happy.
  • 2011rocket3touring
    2011rocket3touring Posts: 1,346 Member
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    kristylovesyou14 wrote: »
    It's not that simple for me I have a hard time letting things go
    It's not suppose to be. It just means you have a heart. Now that heart needs to recognize your own value.
  • JeffreyMGiron
    JeffreyMGiron Posts: 3,582 Member
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    Back in the days, people worked through the tough times, now n days everyone just says oh hes not right/shes not right move on find an easier relationship where you can land peacefully and easy.
    The everlasting love relationships have hardships you fight through, and or solve the problems together. You just need communication. a full long conversation with nothing being held back. And most of all two hearts that care.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,793 Member
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    Don't stay together for the child. It's better to be from a broken home than growing up in one.
  • Zombella
    Zombella Posts: 490 Member
    edited May 2016
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    You need to think it through and outweigh the pros and cons of being in the relationship. Try to talk and if that doesn't work, see what you can do.
  • 2011rocket3touring
    2011rocket3touring Posts: 1,346 Member
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    WeepingAngel81 wrote: »
    I have been in a very toxic relationship, and I can tell you that it is as easy as leaving. I'm going to give you a bit of tough love advice that I wish someone would have given me.....you are making excuses. Stop. You can leave. There is a better life out there. Stop using your daughter as a reason to stay because she needs a strong mom. You are worthy of so much better, but as long as you keep making excuses to stay, you are only going to get sucked into a deeper darker place within yourself. Stop feeling sorry for yourself this minute, and start looking for ways to make a better future for you and your daughter without him. I'm not saying it will be easy, but in the end, it will be very worth it. Most of all, ((big hugs)) because getting to the point where you realize you are sabotaging your own life by allowing negativity to surround you is never an easy journey.

    Soooooo do you freeze when someone looks at you? ;)
  • reddevil614
    reddevil614 Posts: 16 Member
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    newmeadow wrote: »
    TheRoadDog wrote: »
    Don't stay together for the child. It's better to be from a broken home than growing up in one.

    He's not the father of the child. The child never had an intact family, consisting of a married mother and father. And she sure doesn't have one now. I'd think the concern about physical and psychological well being would be focused on this poor little girl who has no choice in all this. But instead, the fretting is reserved for the consenting adult who has moral agency and the parental responsibility to discern. Never change MFP.

    I have been lurking for a long time...just want to say I find almost every one of your posts informative, spot on, and quite amazing....

    and OP, 'we' don't have a daughter, u do, he's not her real father, and frankly, even if he were, that doesn't change my opinion.....unless communication and respect is mutual, u will never be happy and neither will ur daughter and she may mimic the same unhealthy relationship behavior that is being demonstrated to her....u both deserve better
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
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    2011rocket3touring wrote: »
    WeepingAngel81 wrote: »
    I have been in a very toxic relationship, and I can tell you that it is as easy as leaving. I'm going to give you a bit of tough love advice that I wish someone would have given me.....you are making excuses. Stop. You can leave. There is a better life out there. Stop using your daughter as a reason to stay because she needs a strong mom. You are worthy of so much better, but as long as you keep making excuses to stay, you are only going to get sucked into a deeper darker place within yourself. Stop feeling sorry for yourself this minute, and start looking for ways to make a better future for you and your daughter without him. I'm not saying it will be easy, but in the end, it will be very worth it. Most of all, ((big hugs)) because getting to the point where you realize you are sabotaging your own life by allowing negativity to surround you is never an easy journey.

    Soooooo do you freeze when someone looks at you? ;)

    Only long enough to get my scary face on!

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