I need help. I need confidence. I need change.

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BlyRidge
BlyRidge Posts: 1 Member
March 1st- 391.4
March 31st- 397.6

April 1st-398.4
April 30th-402.2

May 1st- 400.4
May 31st- 406.4

This is how my last 3 months have gone. The sad thing, is somewhere in March, I was at 388. I can't get away from fast food. I can't get off of my butt and get up to work out. Not even take a walk. It is disappointing and frustrating. I know the way people look at me. Hell, I look at myself that way. Question is, what have you used as a rally cry? I have hot rock bottom, but that doesn't seem to by lighting my fire. What did you do? How did you spark the powder keg and make it happen? I know I CAN do it, because I HAVE done it, and been as low as 330 a few years back.
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Replies

  • bienie268
    bienie268 Posts: 14 Member
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    Chin up my friend. A little change will start the chain reaction to a big change. Start cooking meal prepping just for one day keep At it and go from that.
  • cathipa
    cathipa Posts: 2,991 Member
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    Why can't you get away from fast food? Why can't you work out at least 1-2 days a week for 20-30 minutes a day? What did you do a few years ago that helped you lose? I think these are important questions you need to ask yourself so you can get started. Figuring out solutions to these problems will start you down your road to weight loss. Saying I can't and having excuses is just that.
  • HStheBusyBee
    HStheBusyBee Posts: 1,366 Member
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    For me personally, I have to focus on smaller goals almost to the point of tunnel vision as the end goal just seems so far away!
    Try and find a diet and exercise plan that you are excited about because that makes it's so much easier to stay on track! Also try not to think of junk food as a treat, that's been such a game-changer for me as previously I would do well for a week and then 'treat' myself to a massive pizza and ice cream.

    Good luck with everything!
  • janetay01
    janetay01 Posts: 1,298 Member
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    My rally cry was my little boy - I want to be around to see him grow up and achieve all the things in his life that he wants to achieve. I'm not talking the same amount to lose as you so I won't pretend to know where you are coming from and how you feel about it but the process is the same - you need to find the one thing that pushes you to do it.

    I agree absolutely with @foxlme - focus on really short term goals - like cutting out the soda for a day/week, cutting out the fast food a day at a time/drinking more water each day. Don't try to change everything at once - the big number and number of things to do will be too daunting and you are more likely to fail. So I would choose one thing to change and work at it for, say a week at a time. Then when you are finding that easier, add something else into the mix.

    And as @scamd83 says, stop saying that you can't. I know it's easy to say but it becomes truth in our own eyes and the reality is that you can do it - if you really want to. You say in your profile that it is for your wife and future children and that is good. But ultimately, it has to be for you - you have to truly want to make the changes.

    Good luck!
  • Dekayla13
    Dekayla13 Posts: 64 Member
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    When I'm happy and in a good mood I can do anything and feel invincible, but when I'm down I beat myself up and focus on how horrible and how much of a failure that I am. It's definitely a mind game :( I was down a little over 20 lbs in march but have gained it all back, due to depression and giving up but today is a new day. I REALLY want this so even though I'm upset about my set back I'm going to pick myself up and go at it 100% and you can, too! If you want a friend feel free to add me! You CAN do this, believe in yourself!
  • CasperNaegle
    CasperNaegle Posts: 936 Member
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    So you can do this and get where you want. You have to start tracking your food and how much you take in. You can eat significant calories and still lose weight. While I would encourage exercise any exercise it's not necessary for you to lose weight. You have to get your self to a point where you want this more than anything else.
  • eating4me
    eating4me Posts: 239 Member
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    First and foremost, change your self-talk. When you hear yourself telling yourself "I can't ...(fill in the blank), immediately replace that thought with "I CAN...I am strong. I am healthy. I am energetic." Our brains only know what we tell it. We all have negative thoughts which can sabotage our success in reaching our goals in fitness and health. It takes a lot of practice to change those thoughts into positives, which lead us to positive action. Why do you want to lose weight? Find out your true reason. Be honest with yourself. Go forward TODAY. You have full control over what you put in your body, whether you sit on your butt and do nothing or go for a walk. Take it one hour at a time, if that helps. You can do this IF you decide you want to change. Small changes at first can lead to huge changes, which will change your life and how you feel about yourself!
  • AvrilC1971
    AvrilC1971 Posts: 13 Member
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    I'm not gonna tell you how to eat right. I'm not gonna tell you about moving your body on step at a time. I'm pretty positive you already know how and what to do...
    You need to figure out what's your worth. What do you deserve? Are you worth self improvement? Are you worth self love? Are you worth a family? Are you worth an amazingly healthy and happy future?
    I know you are!!!! We all are!!! You just have to believe that you're worth it.
    A belief is a thought you keep telling yourself, so tell yourself you're worth every second of the day and before you know it you'll believe it.
  • asjt678
    asjt678 Posts: 60 Member
    edited June 2016
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    JohnONE29 wrote: »
    Small changes can produce big results. Discipline, and not Desire, determines your Destiny. You can do this.

    This...its all mental right now. You are letting this process overwhelm you. Your mind is saying this is impossible and you just don't know where to begin so you give up. So just make some small changes and take baby steps....set mini-goals each week.

    A few things I have tried.

    Set your MFP goal to a 10-20 lb weight loss instead of your goal weight. I wanted to go from 216 to 150. Every time I saw that, I freaked out.

    Get a pedometer or down load a tracking app on your cell phone. Give yourself a daily goal of steps. Don't start with the 10,000 step goal or you will overwhelm yourself and get discouraged if you can't meet it. Start out by just walking around the house or your office a few times and then it won't seem like a chore or that you are 'going to work out'. Do some sit ups, arm exercises, or squats during the commercial breaks of your favorite tv shows.

    You love fast food? So do I!!! Set a goal to only go there a set amount each week. If you go there, swap out the fries for a salad or some baked chips. This will save you several hundred calories. I know Wendy's and Chic fil a will do this for you. Commit to eating a lighter dinner if you get the fries so you will still meet your calorie goal.

    Up your water intake and cut back on sodas. You don't have to go cold turkey but make a commitment that for every glass of soda you drink, you have to chase it with water. This helps you to stay at the 8-10 oz range, instead of going for seconds, thirds, etc. It takes me several days now it get through a 20oz coke.

    Just a few things I started doing. Get luck and don't give up....
  • shan11180
    shan11180 Posts: 110 Member
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    JohnONE29 wrote: »
    Discipline, and not Desire, determines your Destiny.

    This made me happy. Great mantra!
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,841 Member
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    BlyRidge wrote: »
    I know I CAN do it, because I HAVE done it.

    The hardest thing to change is the habits you have created. Even if you can overcome them to lose weight, it is easy to to fall right back into them if you don't really change. It takes modifying not just what you do (eating within your caloric bounds and consistently exercising), but building the new mental habits that make it happen.

    You may need to seek help. You will need others around you to keep you accountable. But in the end, what matters is that you make the new you that you want. You can start small and incrementally increase changes.

    Make two goals - one eating wise and one fitness wise. Something like, you will walk every day for 15 minutes for two week and you will cut out soda or reduce snacks. The goal is only that you stick to it and do it each day. Then make another goal to do the same for a month. If you stick to it, add another 15 minutes of walking each day and cut out or cut down on something else.

    The key is consistency and not trying to do too much too quick. You are building new habits and that just takes time.

    Good luck.

  • Indygirl_81
    Indygirl_81 Posts: 142 Member
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    I notice I have no desire to go to the gym if I eat starchy/sugary foods. I feel less sluggish the less I eat of these types of foods (especially cutting out fast food). It is hard to make healthy food for one person and is easier to go through the drive-thru- but each time I restart this process I realize how crummy food makes me feel crummy (examples: cravings and daily heartburn). The more you can work towards your goal, the more confidence you'll have and the less you'll need to look outside yourself for it. I know, easier said than done. Good luck and add friends on here that will motivate you!
  • moe0303
    moe0303 Posts: 934 Member
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    Weightloss is an investigation of self. While we can offer you our stories, they may or may not be of any help to you. You have to look into yourself and try to make honest determinations about your strengths and weaknesses. Look at factors like how long you have been overweight, and behaviors you enact. Look for people who mirror your experience, but take their advice with a grain of salt. It may or may not be the key to long lasting success. You have the final say in the matter. The only right way is the one that works for you.

    Send me a friend request if you'd like.
  • mikichrisman
    mikichrisman Posts: 15 Member
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    I got a lot of inspiration from everyone's ideas here, thank you so much for taking the time to share the things that inspire and work for you. I too have been banging around at a high weight, 20 pounds up in the last 10 months. Goal is to do 13 for starters. Walk around the block with Ember (dog) every night and drink more water. I will log and keep my food log open for friends. I look forward to seeing what "Bly Ridge" decides to do! MamaMiki