new job, coworkers eat out every day?
tbelle_g
Posts: 8 Member
I just started a new job and I'm in a strange predicament. My team mates get together and go out to get lunch almost every day! No one ever brings their lunch to work. Since I am new and they don't know me yet, I want to socialize so I usually go with them.
As you can imagine this is blowing my calorie and macro goals or making it difficult for me to stay on track. Most of the places they go are sit down pub-style restaurants or quick sub shops and there aren't many healthy options. I get sick of salads very fast since I've never liked salad that much.
At my old job I usually prepared my lunch the night before and bring it to work. How can I still eat healthy without offending them or seeming snobbish if I don't join them?
As you can imagine this is blowing my calorie and macro goals or making it difficult for me to stay on track. Most of the places they go are sit down pub-style restaurants or quick sub shops and there aren't many healthy options. I get sick of salads very fast since I've never liked salad that much.
At my old job I usually prepared my lunch the night before and bring it to work. How can I still eat healthy without offending them or seeming snobbish if I don't join them?
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Replies
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I eat out almost every day and haven't had a problem with it. But I like salads. I would look for grilled chicken or broiled fish. Lean cuts of steak, burgers without the bun.2
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If they don't respect your desire to better yourself that's on them and you shouldn't let it bother you. If you want to go with them you only have a few options.
1. Take your lunch to the restaurant (might seem strange)
2. Eat before or after and maybe have a coffee or unsweet tea while you hang with them.
3. Eat something from where they do.
You could also tell them you have a health issue that causes you to have a strict diet. If you are overweight this would not be a lie.5 -
I have this same issue. People at my office seemed very confused by the fact that I don't go out for lunch. It's not just because of my diet though. I simply can't afford to eat out every day. I can bring food that's just as good (and looks ok in my diary) for much cheaper, and keep that lunch money for taking my son out over the weekend. I would say just do the best you can until you settle in there and get to know people, and then start limiting the days out.6
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What kind of job.....is this?4
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If they take it personally that you want to make healthy choices for yourself, isn't that kind of their problem? If you don't feel comfortable talking about your diet, which is totally understandable, maybe tell them you're trying to save money and don't want to buy pub lunches every day? I actually have a holiday to the US planned later this year which is a pretty convenient excuse in most social situations to just order an appetiser or eat beforehand to save the cost of a meal
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How about just eating a portion of it , then asking for a take out container; for what's left & then consuming the rest, as another meal later?4
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At the pub place look for grilled options with no bread or sides.
Skip the days that the go to sub places unless you can find calories online for them.0 -
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Know feeling when I was placed at another branch for a while. Ways that helped were,
Making lunch main meal of day if I had two courses, then eating light in evening (often have small breakfast anyway). Just have a main course, some restaurants have lighter options. If the others wanted another course I would just have black coffee.
Have also asked for a starter to replace main course, or have asked them to do me a couple of sides of vegetable with a sprinkling of cheese on top. If some of the places are regular you can always ask them if it's possible to leave stuff off or swop stuff.1 -
I have this same issue. People at my office seemed very confused by the fact that I don't go out for lunch. It's not just because of my diet though. I simply can't afford to eat out every day. I can bring food that's just as good (and looks ok in my diary) for much cheaper, and keep that lunch money for taking my son out over the weekend. I would say just do the best you can until you settle in there and get to know people, and then start limiting the days out.
I forgot to mention that eating out is quite expensive! That is another reason I feel uncomfortable buying lunch so often, since the food is usually way overpriced. A big salad is over ten dollars with a drink. But you guys know this.
I work in IT operations and I think it's a culture thing. Bringing your own lunch is just not something they do apparently. Maybe it isn't "cool" , I don't know...
Thanks for the suggestions I will try holding mayo and cheese and try to pick healthiest options. But eventually I just can't go with them every day, it's not realistic for me.3 -
If they don't respect your desire to better yourself that's on them and you shouldn't let it bother you.
But? They go out to lunch - this has nothing to do with "respect".If you want to go with them you only have a few options.
1. Take your lunch to the restaurant (might seem strange)
2. Eat before or after and maybe have a coffee or unsweet tea while you hang with them.
3. Eat something from where they do.
You could also tell them you have a health issue that causes you to have a strict diet. If you are overweight this would not be a lie.
It would be a lie, if it isn't true. Terrible way to start a work relationship.
Just don't go out every time, bring your own lunch when you want and stay active.2 -
I am in a similar situation (also in IT as well). I just flat out told them I am watching my diet. I go out with them whenever they chose a place I can "afford," which is about once a month. It seems to keep them happy. If it's a "special" lunch I eat very light at breakfast and just do the best I can to make a good choice. The "lunch and learns" are the worst!3
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Salads, or order anything else that you want that fits your goals.
Be grateful you work at a place that social. I have a similar challenge with my job since we enjoy getting beers together. If this is the worst thing I encounter then life is pretty damned good. Of course, most of us work out and try to keep ourselves relatively fit too. It's all about balancing priorities.1 -
EvgeniZyntx wrote: »But? They go out to lunch - this has nothing to do with "respect".
I agree this is not a matter of respect. These folks hardly know me yet, I've only been there for 3 weeks.
Inviting me to lunch is their friendly way of trying to include me and taking time to chat, etc. So to decline their invitation feels like I'm being unsociable and sending the wrong message to them. To avoid this I could just go anyway and order a coffee or something. I'm not overweight, actually I don't need to lose any weight but I certainly don't want to gain weight. Eating french fries and cheesy sandwiches is a quick way to pack on the pounds.
It's just strange because in my old job, people would bring lunch most days, some would go out occasionally, it was a mix. All-or-nothing lunch outings is something I haven't had seen before.
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What if you went every other day?0
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I say stay strong to your own healthy habits. I have many meetings at work and they are always catered. I bring my own lunch. People are inspired by my nutritious foods and commend me on my dedication. If you had to follow a strict diet (Kosher, vegan, gluten free, diabetic, etc) bringing your own lunch would be expected. I've taken my food to plenty of restaurants with coworkers and you know what? It's no big deal. Enjoy their company...that's what eating together is for
Your friendly dietitian 1 -
My boyfriend's job is the same way. All of his co workers go out to eat and they all work in Manhattan near Central Park. You can imagine how expensive it is. However, these co-workers, according to my boyfriend, are very bad at managing money. My bf is not, so he pretty much takes his work to lunch every day and eats out maybe once or twice a month.2
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I say stay strong to your own healthy habits. I have many meetings at work and they are always catered. I bring my own lunch. People are inspired by my nutritious foods and commend me on my dedication. If you had to follow a strict diet (Kosher, vegan, gluten free, diabetic, etc) bringing your own lunch would be expected. I've taken my food to plenty of restaurants with coworkers and you know what? It's no big deal. Enjoy their company...that's what eating together is for Your friendly dietitian
Following along with this...while my coworkers did give me and my homemade lunches the stink eye, they would also start saying "I really should do that too". Then I casually mentioned how eating out just doesn't fit within my budget, and I could see them pondering that too. They still primarily stick to going out, but I think they wound up seeing my point of view too.
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EvgeniZyntx wrote: »If they don't respect your desire to better yourself that's on them and you shouldn't let it bother you.
But? They go out to lunch - this has nothing to do with "respect".If you want to go with them you only have a few options.
1. Take your lunch to the restaurant (might seem strange)
2. Eat before or after and maybe have a coffee or unsweet tea while you hang with them.
3. Eat something from where they do.
You could also tell them you have a health issue that causes you to have a strict diet. If you are overweight this would not be a lie.
It would be a lie, if it isn't true. Terrible way to start a work relationship.
Just don't go out every time, bring your own lunch when you want and stay active.
If people judge you based off trying to be healthy, that's disrespect. I didn't say they were disrespecting her. I was just saying if they do it's their problem and not her's. I never said them going out to lunch was disrespectful. I typed a sentence and you somehow got two paragraphs out of it.
Being overweight is a serious health issue! You can't honestly tell me that you believe being overweight is healthy. How is this a lie? She can go into more detail if she wants or not. Either way it is not a lie at all.0 -
You are worried about what people will think about you. I know you are or you wouldn't have taken the time to make this thread and you would just do what you want. This is respect by definition. Unless you truly want your co-workers to think of you as lower than them, what you are after is respect.EvgeniZyntx wrote: »But? They go out to lunch - this has nothing to do with "respect".
I agree this is not a matter of respect. These folks hardly know me yet, I've only been there for 3 weeks.
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Be the first to not go every day, and I bet one or two will be relieved and join you!6
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You are worried about what people will think about you. I know you are or you wouldn't have taken the time to make this thread and you would just do what you want. This is respect by definition. Unless you truly want your co-workers to think of you as lower than them, what you are after is respect.EvgeniZyntx wrote: »But? They go out to lunch - this has nothing to do with "respect".
I agree this is not a matter of respect. These folks hardly know me yet, I've only been there for 3 weeks.
Ummmmm....no.
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Just say no.....say you're dieting or say it's too expensive.0
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@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.2 -
Colorscheme wrote: »My boyfriend's job is the same way. All of his co workers go out to eat and they all work in Manhattan near Central Park. You can imagine how expensive it is. However, these co-workers, according to my boyfriend, are very bad at managing money. My bf is not, so he pretty much takes his work to lunch every day and eats out maybe once or twice a month.
Beyond diet, this is the part that boggles my mind. How on earth can they afford to eat out every day? I understand it could be quite embarrassing, given that she's new there, but I would have to tell them that I'm saving my money and can't afford to eat out every day. Maybe once or twice a month, but not daily.1 -
melissa6771 wrote: »@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.
And I don't understand why people don't understand where she was going with this. She's completely new there and people are trying to make her feel welcome by reaching out and including her. It can be a little uncomfortable to start declining right off the bat because while you want (and do need) that free time to get friendly with people you're going to be working closely with, maybe it isn't totally fitting with your norm. It isn't a matter of her not being able to speak for herself. It's about that line between acclimating to a new work environment while staying within your financial and/or dietary means. No one here has ever had to conform a bit when encountering a given situation?
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Go out once a week. Bring your lunch the rest of the days. Tell them you will join them on Fridays or something.
I worked at a place where people all went to lunch together and I brought lunch. I couldn't afford to eat out every day. No one really cared. It didn't cost me my job or anything.1 -
AuroraGeorge8393 wrote: »Colorscheme wrote: »My boyfriend's job is the same way. All of his co workers go out to eat and they all work in Manhattan near Central Park. You can imagine how expensive it is. However, these co-workers, according to my boyfriend, are very bad at managing money. My bf is not, so he pretty much takes his work to lunch every day and eats out maybe once or twice a month.
Beyond diet, this is the part that boggles my mind. How on earth can they afford to eat out every day? I understand it could be quite embarrassing, given that she's new there, but I would have to tell them that I'm saving my money and can't afford to eat out every day. Maybe once or twice a month, but not daily.
Yeah, exactly.
What my boyfriend ends up doing is eating his lunch, then he'll go wherever his co-workers are going but he won't eat anything, he does it to get fresh air since he usually has to walk to wherever.0 -
melissa6771 wrote: »@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.
And I don't understand why people don't understand where she was going with this. She's completely new there and people are trying to make her feel welcome by reaching out and including her. It can be a little uncomfortable to start declining right off the bat because while you want (and do need) that free time to get friendly with people you're going to be working closely with, maybe it isn't totally fitting with your norm. It isn't a matter of her not being able to speak for herself. It's about that line between acclimating to a new work environment while staying within your financial and/or dietary means. No one here has ever had to conform a bit when encountering a given situation?
Maybe it's a generational thing.
Being uncomfortable is so wrong in this new age.1 -
EvgeniZyntx wrote: »melissa6771 wrote: »@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.
And I don't understand why people don't understand where she was going with this. She's completely new there and people are trying to make her feel welcome by reaching out and including her. It can be a little uncomfortable to start declining right off the bat because while you want (and do need) that free time to get friendly with people you're going to be working closely with, maybe it isn't totally fitting with your norm. It isn't a matter of her not being able to speak for herself. It's about that line between acclimating to a new work environment while staying within your financial and/or dietary means. No one here has ever had to conform a bit when encountering a given situation?
Maybe it's a generational thing.
Being uncomfortable is so wrong in this new age.
Yeah...I completely get that. And I'm not exactly young anymore.... But I do understand the desire to do whatever it takes to establish solid relations in the workplace even if it's goes a bit outside your comfort zone.
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