new job, coworkers eat out every day?
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Be the first to not go every day, and I bet one or two will be relieved and join you!6
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You are worried about what people will think about you. I know you are or you wouldn't have taken the time to make this thread and you would just do what you want. This is respect by definition. Unless you truly want your co-workers to think of you as lower than them, what you are after is respect.EvgeniZyntx wrote: »But? They go out to lunch - this has nothing to do with "respect".
I agree this is not a matter of respect. These folks hardly know me yet, I've only been there for 3 weeks.
Ummmmm....no.
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Just say no.....say you're dieting or say it's too expensive.0
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@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.2 -
Colorscheme wrote: »My boyfriend's job is the same way. All of his co workers go out to eat and they all work in Manhattan near Central Park. You can imagine how expensive it is. However, these co-workers, according to my boyfriend, are very bad at managing money. My bf is not, so he pretty much takes his work to lunch every day and eats out maybe once or twice a month.
Beyond diet, this is the part that boggles my mind. How on earth can they afford to eat out every day? I understand it could be quite embarrassing, given that she's new there, but I would have to tell them that I'm saving my money and can't afford to eat out every day. Maybe once or twice a month, but not daily.1 -
melissa6771 wrote: »@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.
And I don't understand why people don't understand where she was going with this. She's completely new there and people are trying to make her feel welcome by reaching out and including her. It can be a little uncomfortable to start declining right off the bat because while you want (and do need) that free time to get friendly with people you're going to be working closely with, maybe it isn't totally fitting with your norm. It isn't a matter of her not being able to speak for herself. It's about that line between acclimating to a new work environment while staying within your financial and/or dietary means. No one here has ever had to conform a bit when encountering a given situation?
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Go out once a week. Bring your lunch the rest of the days. Tell them you will join them on Fridays or something.
I worked at a place where people all went to lunch together and I brought lunch. I couldn't afford to eat out every day. No one really cared. It didn't cost me my job or anything.1 -
AuroraGeorge8393 wrote: »Colorscheme wrote: »My boyfriend's job is the same way. All of his co workers go out to eat and they all work in Manhattan near Central Park. You can imagine how expensive it is. However, these co-workers, according to my boyfriend, are very bad at managing money. My bf is not, so he pretty much takes his work to lunch every day and eats out maybe once or twice a month.
Beyond diet, this is the part that boggles my mind. How on earth can they afford to eat out every day? I understand it could be quite embarrassing, given that she's new there, but I would have to tell them that I'm saving my money and can't afford to eat out every day. Maybe once or twice a month, but not daily.
Yeah, exactly.
What my boyfriend ends up doing is eating his lunch, then he'll go wherever his co-workers are going but he won't eat anything, he does it to get fresh air since he usually has to walk to wherever.0 -
melissa6771 wrote: »@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.
And I don't understand why people don't understand where she was going with this. She's completely new there and people are trying to make her feel welcome by reaching out and including her. It can be a little uncomfortable to start declining right off the bat because while you want (and do need) that free time to get friendly with people you're going to be working closely with, maybe it isn't totally fitting with your norm. It isn't a matter of her not being able to speak for herself. It's about that line between acclimating to a new work environment while staying within your financial and/or dietary means. No one here has ever had to conform a bit when encountering a given situation?
Maybe it's a generational thing.
Being uncomfortable is so wrong in this new age.1 -
EvgeniZyntx wrote: »melissa6771 wrote: »@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.
And I don't understand why people don't understand where she was going with this. She's completely new there and people are trying to make her feel welcome by reaching out and including her. It can be a little uncomfortable to start declining right off the bat because while you want (and do need) that free time to get friendly with people you're going to be working closely with, maybe it isn't totally fitting with your norm. It isn't a matter of her not being able to speak for herself. It's about that line between acclimating to a new work environment while staying within your financial and/or dietary means. No one here has ever had to conform a bit when encountering a given situation?
Maybe it's a generational thing.
Being uncomfortable is so wrong in this new age.
Yeah...I completely get that. And I'm not exactly young anymore.... But I do understand the desire to do whatever it takes to establish solid relations in the workplace even if it's goes a bit outside your comfort zone.
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EvgeniZyntx wrote: »melissa6771 wrote: »@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.
And I don't understand why people don't understand where she was going with this. She's completely new there and people are trying to make her feel welcome by reaching out and including her. It can be a little uncomfortable to start declining right off the bat because while you want (and do need) that free time to get friendly with people you're going to be working closely with, maybe it isn't totally fitting with your norm. It isn't a matter of her not being able to speak for herself. It's about that line between acclimating to a new work environment while staying within your financial and/or dietary means. No one here has ever had to conform a bit when encountering a given situation?
Maybe it's a generational thing.
Being uncomfortable is so wrong in this new age.
Yeah...I completely get that. And I'm not exactly young anymore.... But I do understand the desire to do whatever it takes to establish solid relations in the workplace even if it's goes a bit outside your comfort zone.
I agree with you, and I'd likely go with the group and slowly go back to bringing in lunches 3/5 days and explain that I prefer to do that because "eating out every day is just too much for me".
(ps ... older than you.)3 -
Is there a way for you to easily suggest a healthier option for going out to lunch? My old workplace was really into the greasy Chinese that was near our work, but I discovered a Hawaiian BBQ place the same distance away where I could get a 'kids plate' of grilled shrimp with broccoli instead of rice or some grilled chicken breast, and they could still get their sweet&sour sauces and fried foods. If you're in a place to suggest, "Hey, I just discovered this other place close by- let's try that tomorrow?" maybe you can steer them towards food that works better for you?1
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I would just cheerfully say next time - "oh, thanks but I need a break from eating out for a while so I brought my lunch. Have a great time and I'll join you another day". Repeat as often as needed. Or "love to go on Friday but I'm bringing my lunches the rest of the week." Smile!2
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EvgeniZyntx wrote: »EvgeniZyntx wrote: »melissa6771 wrote: »@tbelle_g
I can't even believe this is a conversation. Make your lunches, bring them, eat them, and agree to go with them once a week if you want. Why do you have to do anything just because everyone else is doing it? And why would you have to explain yourself? You choose to eat healthier and spend less because it's what you want and it's getting you to YOUR goals. You don't have to live to make your coworkers happy, or to fit in. If they can't accept or respect your choices, that's their issue, not yours. They will either like and accept you for who you are or they won't, whether you go out for lunch daily or not should have absolutely no bearing on that.
Do what makes you happy! Seriously.
And I don't understand why people don't understand where she was going with this. She's completely new there and people are trying to make her feel welcome by reaching out and including her. It can be a little uncomfortable to start declining right off the bat because while you want (and do need) that free time to get friendly with people you're going to be working closely with, maybe it isn't totally fitting with your norm. It isn't a matter of her not being able to speak for herself. It's about that line between acclimating to a new work environment while staying within your financial and/or dietary means. No one here has ever had to conform a bit when encountering a given situation?
Maybe it's a generational thing.
Being uncomfortable is so wrong in this new age.
Yeah...I completely get that. And I'm not exactly young anymore.... But I do understand the desire to do whatever it takes to establish solid relations in the workplace even if it's goes a bit outside your comfort zone.
I agree with you, and I'd likely go with the group and slowly go back to bringing in lunches 3/5 days and explain that I prefer to do that because "eating out every day is just too much for me".
(ps ... older than you.)
Yup. That's how I would handle it. Once I got comfortable enough with people in my office I just laid it out there and said...two lunches are equivalent to a tank of gas, and I need the gas money more than the sandwich.
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You are worried about what people will think about you. I know you are or you wouldn't have taken the time to make this thread and you would just do what you want. This is respect by definition. Unless you truly want your co-workers to think of you as lower than them, what you are after is respect.EvgeniZyntx wrote: »But? They go out to lunch - this has nothing to do with "respect".
I agree this is not a matter of respect. These folks hardly know me yet, I've only been there for 3 weeks.
Ummmmm....no.
Care to explain? Look up the definition for respect before elaborating please. It's laughable for you not to know what the word means.0 -
I think this is an IT thing...
My coworkers do the same thing everyday, and always pick places like pizza parlors and burger joints. Not that there's anything wrong with it...I just don't see how they can do everyday without it costing a fortune. I bring my lunch, so they're used to me saying no. Sometimes one or two of them try to pressure me, but they know I'm stubborn, too. Why would I want to go get pizza or Italian everyday if I brought my delicious taco salad or homemade BBQ chicken? Besides, I'd be falling asleep at my desk within the hour if I ate heavier foods everyday!
If you're feeling awkward about it, though, I like the idea someone suggested of going once a week or so. I'd just tell them you're trying to save money, which is true because you save a bundle bringing your lunch, haha. It seems awkward at first, but after awhile they'll get used to you declining and should hopefully be no big deal.0 -
pre-plan the restaurants for the lower calorie choices and/or eat half/take half with you, maybe for supper or a pet or such.0
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In the summer months, my co-workers often try to get together and eat outside at a little park or wherever. Some of us bring lunch, some grab subs or takeout, but we all meet up and eat together. Try to set something up if there's outside seating or a park nearby.0
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dragon_girl26 wrote: »I think this is an IT thing...
My coworkers do the same thing everyday, and always pick places like pizza parlors and burger joints. Not that there's anything wrong with it...I just don't see how they can do everyday without it costing a fortune. I bring my lunch, so they're used to me saying no. Sometimes one or two of them try to pressure me, but they know I'm stubborn, too. Why would I want to go get pizza or Italian everyday if I brought my delicious taco salad or homemade BBQ chicken? Besides, I'd be falling asleep at my desk within the hour if I ate heavier foods everyday!
If you're feeling awkward about it, though, I like the idea someone suggested of going once a week or so. I'd just tell them you're trying to save money, which is true because you save a bundle bringing your lunch, haha. It seems awkward at first, but after awhile they'll get used to you declining and should hopefully be no big deal.
I wonder that too, since my boyfriend works in IT, lol.1 -
Save your lbs and £s by ordering stuff that you'd usually have for lunch - like maybe a soup. Be wary of salads as they can load them up with creamy dressings. I'd worry for my budget as much as my waistline it that situation!0
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