Why is weight loss so frustratingly slow?

jbatinker
jbatinker Posts: 313 Member
in Motivation and Support
I know, I know, healthy weight loss is a 1-2 pound per week. But sometimes don't you just want it to be over already. I have been on a journey for 4 months now - Started at 250, down to 213.5 but want to be at 200 before August 14th. (we are going on a cruise). I try to set short term goals for myself - In April we went to Disney and I wanted to hit 25 pounds, but was only at 21 pounds.

My clothes are fitting better and even got rid of my "fat" clothes. Don't even want them in the closet so I am not tempted to go back. I am now walking 2 miles 5 out of 7 days and hit a core circuit class twice a week.

I guess it is hard to keep at it week after week when it seems so slow. I am including before and after face pictures as a way to keep myself motivated.

Starting - 250
8lynqnuzdqx4.jpg

Down to 215
bkgrvlbpoiwb.jpg

My question to the MFP community is - how did you stay motivated?

Thanks,
«1

Replies

  • Shells918
    Shells918 Posts: 1,070 Member
    37 pounds in 4 months is an amazing loss! It can get frustrating to look at the finish line when it seems so far away.

    Sometimes making mini goals and rewarding yourself for the can make the journey easier and more realistic.

    So I think first, know that any loss is a good loss.

    Also, maintaining the same weight is still better than gaining weight.

    Pick a goal, and a reward for that goal, like
    When I lose 10 more pounds I'll buy a new pair of shoes or whatever treat you might want.

    I stay motivated by not only looking at the scale but also by taking measurements. You said your body had changed and clothes are fitting differently, you've likely lost a ton of inches, which can be extremely inspiring. I take measurements every month or so and although I've lost 20 pounds since July, I've lost 27 inches since November when I started measuring.

    And even if you don't post them, take full body pics too, so you can see the difference for yourself. It can be eye opening.
  • k_nelson_24
    k_nelson_24 Posts: 251 Member
    Gaining the weight did not happen over night! And in order for you to maintain your loss, it is so important to take things slow. Also, I wouldn't put time limits on your weight loss goals. Set small goals and just focus on one at a time without rushing to meet a certain date. If you are wanting this to be a life change, there is no end to it. There really isn't an after. There is no rush because you will have to work for it the rest of your life! The longer you do it, the more second nature it becomes. Staying patient is so important! Don't rush and trust the process.

  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    jbatinker wrote: »
    I know, I know, healthy weight loss is a 1-2 pound per week. But sometimes don't you just want it to be over already. I have been on a journey for 4 months now - Started at 250, down to 213.5 but want to be at 200 before August 14th.

    That is EXACTLY the reason most people quite trying to be healthier. Most of us gained weight over years of neglect, overeating and lack of exercise, but we want it fixed quick and lose interest when we realize it isn't. BUT...that is just the mental part of the challenge and once you can get your motivation in line with that reality, the expectations become manageable and very attainable.

    just keep doing the process and making the best choices you can. Do it every day, all day, every week, for the rest of your life.

  • jbatinker
    jbatinker Posts: 313 Member
    pondee629 wrote: »
    Nobody ever remembers how long it took to put the weight on. Hint; a real long time, most likely a great portion of your life. And we ALL want it gone NOW. Ain't going to happen. It came on gradually, it's going to go off gradually.

    It was your lifestyle that caused the weight gain. It will be your lifestyle that is going to have it go off. It's not a diet as in a temporary change in your daily life. It's a change in your daily life, now, tomorrow and for the future. Let us get used to it. A pound a week. Seems small. Seems insignificant. It works. Over time you will see the results you were always hoping for. You will find clothes that were once tight that you now "swim" in. Your exercise routine will become easy and you'll look for ways to "pump it up". And, over this time, you will develop the habits and lifestyle to maintain the weight, figure and general fitness you now strive for.

    It don't come easy and it don't come quick. But, as long as you want it enough to keep at it, it will come. Motivation comes for the incremental success we get along the way. Celebrate them and continue.

    Life is a journey completed in small steps, you just keep taking them.

    Thank you
  • jbatinker
    jbatinker Posts: 313 Member
    k_nelson_24 wrote: »
    Gaining the weight did not happen over night! And in order for you to maintain your loss, it is so important to take things slow. Also, I wouldn't put time limits on your weight loss goals. Set small goals and just focus on one at a time without rushing to meet a certain date. If you are wanting this to be a life change, there is no end to it. There really isn't an after. There is no rush because you will have to work for it the rest of your life! The longer you do it, the more second nature it becomes. Staying patient is so important! Don't rush and trust the process.

    You are right, it did not happen over night. I guess instead of setting "date" goals I need to focus on my commitment to this journey. It will be for the rest of my life.
  • AnnofB
    AnnofB Posts: 3,589 Member
    edited June 2016
    You've done a fantastic job. Hang in there and just keep on doing what you are doing. Maybe change up your food choices, try something you've never eaten before, or do a different form of exercise to keep things interesting.

    BTW, you look great. :)
  • beachbum13
    beachbum13 Posts: 96 Member
    Something I have learned is that the journey will never end. It is a lifestyle change. If you don't realize or accept that, most people go back to their old ways of eating and gain the weight back. If you feel like you can't do what you are doing now forever, maybe you can look at making changes that could be supported long-term? I think it is always sad to put in so much effort and then slip back into old thinking patterns and find yourself back at the beginning. A nurse gave me this advice and I found it helpful. I hope it can help you or others too. thanks!
  • CharlieBeansmomTracey
    CharlieBeansmomTracey Posts: 7,682 Member
    edited June 2016
    to keep me motivated I just ask myself,do you want to be fat again and huff and puff while walking because you cant catch your breath? do you want to have to buy all new "fat" clothes? do you want to have to go back on all the meds you were on if you get fat again? do you want to risk all the things you can do now and go back to not being able to do them? I know the answer to all of that is NO.so that is what keeps me going. Im losing slowly and by slowly I mean I started almost 4 years ago and still have about 24 lbs to go. and its taking forever to come off.yes it gets discouraging but I know now that I am in better shape than I was even when I weighed less. just keep doing what you are doing. even if the weight loss is slow,its still a loss and a step in the right direction.
  • jimzajc
    jimzajc Posts: 9 Member
    Well I started my journey on June 8th and my goal is to lose 30 pounds in 90 days. I started at 232 and as of last Wednesday I was 225 for a 7 lb loss. I am weighing myself once a week, cut my soda intake down considerably and just watched what I eat. I am walking between 1-3 miles daily and will soon be hitting some circuit training in the near future. I do not look at days that I go over my calorie intake as being bad rather a "treat" as long as it is not day after day. Ideally I want to another 30-40 pounds after the initial 30 pounds in 6-12 months.

    As others have said do what you need to do stay motivated because what works for one person may not work for others. I know what I have to look forward to when I drop the first 30 pounds hiatal hernia repair which will help my self esteem because right now not only do I have a keg but the keg has bulge that makes clothing fit awkward.

    Keep up the good work and take it one day at a time.
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,463 Member
    This is great progress! Of course, we all want it to be over fast, but that's not how it works. 4 months is not really a long time in the big picture. I've been at it 2 years with losses every month, some people even longer. Now that's a long time!
    Making constant progress in weight loss and fitness is my motivation. Not wanting to go back to where I was is motivation. Set a plan then follow it. Don't keep looking for that feeling of motivation, because most days you won't find it. Just keep plugging away!
  • shadowfax_c11
    shadowfax_c11 Posts: 1,942 Member
    I don't think of my weight loss as having an end point. I think of this as something I will work on for the rest of my life. I spent the first half of my life gaining it. I can spend the second half losing it.

    I am starting to think of it not as losing weight but as learning to manage my relationship with food in a better way. Weight loss is just a happy side effect.
  • ARGriffy
    ARGriffy Posts: 1,002 Member
    It's not slow, it's the start of the rest of your life as a healthy happy you! Enjoy the journey and you will succeed long term rather than viewing it as a thing to get over with :) good luck!
  • capaul42
    capaul42 Posts: 1,390 Member
    Try setting some non scale goals. I like fitness goals. Like being able to do a full pushup with perfect form. Currently I can only do perfect form on my knees. I also have goals for when I go up on my weights (dumbbells) and length of time for planks. Stuff like that. Had goals for my stationary bike when I first started as I was very unfit and could barely do 5 minutes. Currently my goal for the bike is 60 minutes, I'm at 45 right now.
  • SueSueDio
    SueSueDio Posts: 4,796 Member
    shadowfax_c11 wrote: »
    I am starting to think of it not as losing weight but as learning to manage my relationship with food in a better way. Weight loss is just a happy side effect.

    That's a great way to look at it - I need to remember that! :)

    OP, you're doing great! I know it's tough... like others have said, we all want to lose the weight NOW and not have the process drag on for months or years. But remember to celebrate every pound you lose! Don't feel bad if you don't make a loss you wanted by a certain date, be proud of however much you DID lose. Set goals that are unrelated to the number on the scale, like fitness goals as the above poster mentioned, or fitting into a favourite outfit again, or reaching a certain measurement for bust, waist or hips.

    Remember to think about how you feel, about how your clothes fit, about what else has changed in your life, about things that are easier for you to do than they were when you started. Never compare yourself to other people who may be thinner, fitter, losing faster or whatever else - just compare to yourself last week/month/year and see how much you've achieved. Work on being a better version of you, not being like someone else. :)

    Go to a store and find something that weighs around 40lbs, and pick it up. Think about how you used to carry that around on your body, and how great it is that you got rid of it!

    Be kind to yourself - it's going to take a long time, and there will be days, weeks or maybe even months where you don't lose much or perhaps even gain a couple of pounds. It's all normal. You'll eat too much sometimes. You'll want to throw in the towel now and again. You might even fall off the wagon completely for a few weeks! Don't worry, just get back up and start over. It's okay. :)

    Remember that even at an average of a pound per week, you'll be 52lbs lighter after a year. If you give up, you'll stay where you are or even gain back what you've lost so far. Use thoughts like that to keep yourself motivated when things get rough.

    And yeah, like others have said - this doesn't have an end date. Once you get to your goal weight, you have to stay there and that's a whole new ball game! :) So working on ways to get your mental game together now will help in the future, as well as having a plan and continuing goals for when you do get there - whether that's this year, next year, or a couple more down the line.

    Read the stickies at the top of each forum section, if you haven't already - there's a ton of useful and motivating advice on these boards if you look for it. :)

    Good luck, and keep at it - you WILL get there, eventually, and you'll be glad you didn't up completely when you do!
  • STEVE142142
    STEVE142142 Posts: 867 Member
    pondee629 wrote: »
    Nobody ever remembers how long it took to put the weight on. Hint; a real long time, most likely a great portikon of your life. And we ALL want it gone NOW. Ain't going to happen. It came on gradually, it's going to go off gradually.

    It was your lifestyle that caused the weight gain. It will be your lifestyle that is going to have it go off. It's not a diet as in a temporary change in your daily life. It's a change in your daily life, now, tomorrow and for the future. Let us get used to it. A pound a week. Seems small. Seems insignificant. It works. Over time you will see the results you were always hoping for. You will find clothes that were once tight that you now "swim" in. Your exercise routine will become easy and you'll look for ways to "pump it up". And, over this time, you will develop the habits and lifestyle to maintain the weight, figure and general fitness you now strive for.

    It don't come easy and it don't come quick. But, as long as you want it enough to keep at it, it will come. Motivation comes for the incremental success we get along the way. Celebrate them and continue.

    Life is a journey completed in small steps, you just keep taking them.

    Thanks this saved me a lot of time writing my response. You summed it up perfectly.

    The only thing I will add is that you have to find a selfish why. It can't be for the significant other and can't be for the kids it has to be totally for yourself that's what's going to get you through the rough times. Also as a secondary benefit that selfish why will take care of all the other reasons. Also realize that you're worth it and you deserve it.
  • xlgman
    xlgman Posts: 33 Member
    You're all dropping some solid advice on this thread!
  • amanda000002014
    amanda000002014 Posts: 73 Member
    I look at this as changing my life little by little, and the losing weight is a side effect.
  • drabbits2
    drabbits2 Posts: 179 Member
    Wow--I am not even the original poster and this is exactly the input I need right now. We have all been in a bad place weight wise at one point or another and all the advice here is terrific. Finding the SELFISH WHY is key for me. Ultimately we have to be healthy for ourselves--the vanity stuff is not sustainable (at least it's not for me). I want to be healthy--at age 45 I do not want to be a soft and flabby middle aged mom--sooo cliche. How cool would it be to be a strong and svelte 45 year old!?! Healthy and strong, not tired and lazy.
  • pebble4321
    pebble4321 Posts: 1,132 Member
    I think setting hard goals of "must be this weight by this time" is setting yourself up for failure.
    Maybe you'll reach those goals, maybe not. It doesn't always mean you've done a bad job at it - or even if it does, there's not point in beating yourself up.

    I think it helps to have other goals, things that you can directly control, because the number on the scale is not something you can magically change, even when you eat well and exercise, there are other factors (hormones, medical conditions etc) that influence this.

    Maybe better goals are things like:
    - walking for 3km or 10,000 steps or 30 minutes 6 days a week.
    - eating five veg and 2 fruit every day
    - trying a new kind of exercise (lots of free workouts on line) every week

    And the payoff isn't always about the numbers either. You might have "only" lost 21 pounds before you went to Disney, but did you find it easier to walk around without getting exhausted? Have you found something in your wardrobe that you can fit into again? Have you found new foods or recipes that you enjoy?

    I think if you spend your time saying things like "this is sooo slow, I'll never get there" you'll be constantly miserable.
    If you spend your time saying - I set three goals this week and met all of them. Hooray!
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    You're losing close to 10 lbs a month and complaining it is slow? :huh:

    Rethink your expectations because things will slow down and without understanding that you will only get more and more frustrated. Set up other goals or understand that the time focused losses (xx by date) can be so hard you'll want to quit.

    Does the "constant miserable" mode motivate you or hinder you?
  • jbatinker
    jbatinker Posts: 313 Member
    SueSueDio wrote: »
    shadowfax_c11 wrote: »
    I am starting to think of it not as losing weight but as learning to manage my relationship with food in a better way. Weight loss is just a happy side effect.

    That's a great way to look at it - I need to remember that! :)

    OP, you're doing great! I know it's tough... like others have said, we all want to lose the weight NOW and not have the process drag on for months or years. But remember to celebrate every pound you lose! Don't feel bad if you don't make a loss you wanted by a certain date, be proud of however much you DID lose. Set goals that are unrelated to the number on the scale, like fitness goals as the above poster mentioned, or fitting into a favourite outfit again, or reaching a certain measurement for bust, waist or hips.

    Remember to think about how you feel, about how your clothes fit, about what else has changed in your life, about things that are easier for you to do than they were when you started. Never compare yourself to other people who may be thinner, fitter, losing faster or whatever else - just compare to yourself last week/month/year and see how much you've achieved. Work on being a better version of you, not being like someone else. :)

    Go to a store and find something that weighs around 40lbs, and pick it up. Think about how you used to carry that around on your body, and how great it is that you got rid of it!

    Be kind to yourself - it's going to take a long time, and there will be days, weeks or maybe even months where you don't lose much or perhaps even gain a couple of pounds. It's all normal. You'll eat too much sometimes. You'll want to throw in the towel now and again. You might even fall off the wagon completely for a few weeks! Don't worry, just get back up and start over. It's okay. :)

    Remember that even at an average of a pound per week, you'll be 52lbs lighter after a year. If you give up, you'll stay where you are or even gain back what you've lost so far. Use thoughts like that to keep yourself motivated when things get rough.

    And yeah, like others have said - this doesn't have an end date. Once you get to your goal weight, you have to stay there and that's a whole new ball game! :) So working on ways to get your mental game together now will help in the future, as well as having a plan and continuing goals for when you do get there - whether that's this year, next year, or a couple more down the line.

    Read the stickies at the top of each forum section, if you haven't already - there's a ton of useful and motivating advice on these boards if you look for it. :)

    Good luck, and keep at it - you WILL get there, eventually, and you'll be glad you didn't up completely when you do!

    Great words of wisdom! I did go home last night after reading this post and tried on a pair of Tinkerbell PJ's (Yes, Disney fanatic here) that I have not been able to wear since I bought them and they FIT!!! Thank you.
  • pondee629
    pondee629 Posts: 2,469 Member
    STEVE142142 wrote: »
    pondee629 wrote: »
    Nobody ever remembers how long it took to put the weight on. Hint; a real long time, most likely a great portikon of your life. And we ALL want it gone NOW. Ain't going to happen. It came on gradually, it's going to go off gradually.

    It was your lifestyle that caused the weight gain. It will be your lifestyle that is going to have it go off. It's not a diet as in a temporary change in your daily life. It's a change in your daily life, now, tomorrow and for the future. Let us get used to it. A pound a week. Seems small. Seems insignificant. It works. Over time you will see the results you were always hoping for. You will find clothes that were once tight that you now "swim" in. Your exercise routine will become easy and you'll look for ways to "pump it up". And, over this time, you will develop the habits and lifestyle to maintain the weight, figure and general fitness you now strive for.

    It don't come easy and it don't come quick. But, as long as you want it enough to keep at it, it will come. Motivation comes for the incremental success we get along the way. Celebrate them and continue.

    Life is a journey completed in small steps, you just keep taking them.

    Thanks this saved me a lot of time writing my response. You summed it up perfectly.

    The only thing I will add is that you have to find a selfish why. It can't be for the significant other and can't be for the kids it has to be totally for yourself that's what's going to get you through the rough times. Also as a secondary benefit that selfish why will take care of all the other reasons. Also realize that you're worth it and you deserve it.

    YES. It's all ME, I want to do this, I want to be back into shape, I want to be able to run a Half Marathon, I want to look good on the beach, I want to fell better, both physically and about myself, I want, I want, Me, Me, Me,...

    Finishing that first 5K, my profile picture, felt REAL GOOD. ;-)
  • SueSueDio
    SueSueDio Posts: 4,796 Member
    jbatinker wrote: »
    Great words of wisdom! I did go home last night after reading this post and tried on a pair of Tinkerbell PJ's (Yes, Disney fanatic here) that I have not been able to wear since I bought them and they FIT!!! Thank you.

    Fabulous! There you go... didn't it feel great to fit into those? :)

    I have boxes of clothes that no longer fit me, and I try some on every few pounds. Of course it's a little disappointing if something is still too tight, but when I find one that DOES fit it's an awesome feeling! And I know that if I stay on track, the rest of them will fit soon and eventually be too big. :)
  • Adc7225
    Adc7225 Posts: 1,318 Member
    Congrats on your progress so far, I know it can be painfully slow especially when we have set a goal in mind. One thing that I would do to try and not be so hard on myself with date-weight goals was to start doing some activity you don't really care for. For me it was anything that required me to get on the floor - I wasn't having it!!! But for some reason I could never justify why and so one day after my trainer made get on floor and do bicycle crunches, that I did but HATED every last one. I decided that I refused to let them win and started doing them at home to challenge myself and get my mind off my plateau, being able to do that and the added exercises I started doing I not only gained some strength, lost some inches but found out being on the floor is not so bad. I did get past the plateau and didn't stress myself about the fact that I hadn't lost any weight.
  • sashayoung72
    sashayoung72 Posts: 441 Member
    You are doing GREAT! and 4 months, ahhh I remember that. I've been 18 months and yes I'd like it to be over, but I know i will always have to count so it's just a journey!

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