How can I stay focus with weight loss when I have been dealing with the death of love ones?

HippySkoppy wrote: »

Look upon this time as something positive, for you. Something stable and predictable amidst the chaos.

My dad was unexpectedly diagnosed with very advanced cancer in February and died suddenly in March. My goal was to keep logging everything and not stress as much over what I ate or what the calories were. I continued to wear my Fitbit every day as well. The routine, even though I didn't think of it this way at the time, helped beyond just continuing to manage my weight.

I initially had no appetite, so there was no issue. Once the desire to devour everything kicked in, I gave myself permission to have a few days of eating recklessly and then set my calorie target to a smaller deficit. I also used all my Fitbit calories when previously I did not. Now I'm working on habit-building again and getting more produce and activity back in. I have continued to lose weight through these last three months (some stalled weeks and a couple of gains along the way), and that has given me a lot of hope when it comes to permanently managing my weight.

Basically, log. Eat at maintenance if you need to. Give yourself permission to loosen up a bit, but keep up the basics. For me, that was logging and simply continuing to wear the Fitbit with no pressure on the numbers at first.

I'm so sorry to hear that you are dealing with so many losses in such a short space of time.
I think that all you can do is just do your best each day, but don't feel bad if you can't keep logging accurately every single day. Maybe pre-planning your meals for the day ahead might make the day a little easier because you don't need to spend time or energy on thinking about what to eat when you are caught up in everything that is happening.
And from my own experience when my mum was in hospice for three months before she passed away - try to make time for some exercise as often as you can. I took up running while she was sick and I think it really did keep me sane for a while there. Not that you have to run.. but any exercise that you enjoy can only be a good thing.

Good luck

I'm so sorry for everything you've had to go through. My best advice is just to keep things as simple and flexible as possible. And also realize you can be strong, but there may be times when you really need rest and/or a treat, rather than perfectly sticking to your plan. Above all, do the best you can to take care of yourself.

I would just focus on eating healthy and not counting; now is not the time to focus on the minutia of calories.

I am so very sorry for all of your losses...so close together too. Praying right now for God to be so close to you and bring you peace as only He can do. I know how grief can do this when my dad died. I think food is used for comfort many times and then it can get to the point of taking a toll on how we feel if eating too much sugar. When I eat too much sugar, I find that I get even more emotional and cry than I would had I not eaten it or so much of it. It's like a little toddler who has eaten too much candy and then cries and cries, lol. I am like that toddler when I've had excess sugar. as some others have already said, it is important to take care of yourself during this time. But allow yourself time to grieve too. Don't be hard on yourself during an already very difficult time. If I've learned anything with weight loss...we go through lots of seasons! Some are bright and some very dark. We just pick up when we are ready and do the best we can do with God's strength that he gives us for each new day. I pray that you feel the strength and arms of Jesus holding you close during this difficult time.

What heavy grief to bear! I am so sorry for all your losses.

It sounds like you are on the right track for taking care of yourself with professionals and taking control of your weight. You can do this. Just take it one day at a time. You'll get through.

Mentally sending you a big hug.

I'm so sorry, OP. That sounds like a very difficult situation. Don't be too hard on yourself for not logging perfectly. Just do the best you can and give yourself the space to work through your emotions. Perhaps exercise can help take your mind off things for a few hours a week? Sending lots of hugs.

It's hard. I lost my mother to a very aggressive cancer 5 yrs ago. It was only 2 months from diagnosis to death. We were all in shock. I had lost 70 lbs up to then. Being an emotional eater, I started eating more carbs, sweets and eating too frequently. In 3 yrs, I had gained 45 lbs. 2 yrs ago I started working on it very diligently and as of today, I have lost the 45. When I said I had lost that weight, an emotional tug made me feel like I had lost my mother all over again. I had to remind myself that that weight was not my mother and holding onto it would not bring her back. My mom would want me to lose this weight and be healthy.

I'm sorry to hear your story. I am a cancer survivor. Remember that they want you to be healthy and strong.

Be well.
Gwen

I can't even imagine what you're through, but I've just lost my mother after a devastating long illness. Her conditions begun to deteriorate 10 months ago and my immediate reaction was: one hour exercise a day (indoor cycling and calisthenics at home, early morning or late evening!!) and regaining my healthy weight. I was compelled to do it, I needed to be strong for my family and for myself. Pure survival istinct. It gives you a tiny tiny reason to be happy everyday and how much you need it!!! My best wishes for everything