Ashamed to go back to the gym

darcyelizabeth
darcyelizabeth Posts: 19 Member
in Motivation and Support
My excuse for not going back to the gym is 'I'm too tired'. 5months ago I had a baby, and she has been sleeping through the night for around 2 months now. I haven't gone back because I am so embarrassed at how big I have become. I am 5 stone overweight. I didn't gain it all during pregnancy, I gained a lot beforehand as I am an emotional eater, and I was having a lot of problems during that time. I am sat here in my gym gear, but I feel sick at the thought of going. I know people who are members, and I am so ashamed for them to see me. I just feel horrible, like I am destined to stay fat forever. I don't know how I'm going to snap out of it :(

Replies

  • fitmamma32250
    fitmamma32250 Posts: 1 Member
    Then don't do the gym.. why not start with an online workout program. There are so many great ones. I do daily burn, but there's also Gaia, workout apps such as Couch to 5k and of course youtube. In fact, many studies have shown that if you make working out super easy and automatic, you are more likely to stick with it :smiley:
  • darcyelizabeth
    darcyelizabeth Posts: 19 Member
    I never really thought of that to be honest. There's no way I'm doing couch to 5k on the streets though, that'd be worse than the treadmill ha. I guess I was hoping someone could give me some magical piece of advice that would make me confident again. But I know my confidence doesn't come back till I start shrinking. How shallow am I :s
  • julie2038
    julie2038 Posts: 142 Member
    You snap out of it one day at a time! Accept and LOVE who you are now. That new baby needs a healthy mom physically and emotionally. If your not ready for the gym, just go for a walk or do an exercise video. If the emotions are real bad talk to your doctor. It could be some postpartum depression. Good luck.
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,630 Member
    Start by going for walks.
  • Chienie
    Chienie Posts: 2 Member
    Gym is not the only place to sweat. Try 20 push ups. You will start to sweat
  • bebeisfit
    bebeisfit Posts: 951 Member
    People won't judge you. I think they will be happy to see you back and making an effort. Seriously, people are so into their own workouts and insecurities that they don't notice others. I've gone up and down in weight over the years and have seen others do the same.. Go to the gym if you want, I know I feel a sense of accomplishment. If it's a source of anxiety, then do what others have said and start out at home. And...you just had a baby! Be kind to yourself. Good luck!
  • melissa6771
    melissa6771 Posts: 894 Member
    edited June 2016
    I was feeling the exact same as you! I know tons of people at my gym, hadn't been in over 2 years and was horrified to go back being 52 pounds heavier than before, 72 pounds heavier than when I used to workout a lot, never mind lost all muscle and was so out of shape. Plus. The gym had moved across the street and I didn't now where anything was!

    Then, I just went. I have bad arthritis in my knee and I knew I had to start working on it. PT didn't help and I wanted to do it on my own. That was back in November before I even started MFP, which didn't happen until March 9. Little by little I got more comfortable being there, talking to people I knew and it just subsided. Until two months ago when I wanted to start really lifting weights again and had to go back to the weight area, I got that feeling again. I just pushed through it. I had to do it for me.

    Just this week I have started to really feel more comfortable. I have lost 36 pounds and I'm getting stronger and more confident again. The only thing I can say to you is to just do it! Once you get going and get into a routine, you will feel better and know that you are doing more to get yourself healthy again and the fear of what people think will subside. I literally roll out of bed, brush my teeth, get dressed and go, No makeup no nothing and I survived. Chin Up! You can do this.
  • michelleepotter
    michelleepotter Posts: 800 Member
    darcyelizabeth wrote: »
    Well I drove here sat outside in my car reading all your replies and it gave me the courage to go in. I'm sweating like a pig and I feel like I'm carrying someone on my back. I tried the couch 2 5k but I couldn't finish the run parts as I am so unfit. Thank you for all your replies and support, it means a lot x

    I am so proud of you for getting in there and working out. I hope you are proud of yourself, too! So often, just getting started is the hardest part. You can do this, and you can be confident and happy with who you are no matter your weight, because look how strong and determined you are to improve your life! Your daughter is lucky to have such a momma. :smile:
  • darcyelizabeth
    darcyelizabeth Posts: 19 Member
    Aw you guys are so kind! Thank you all so much! Really really means so much. I have been on such a downer about myself for such a long time now. With regards to c25k, I think I am doing it pretty slowly, it's in km's on the treadmill though, I was doing 5k an hour walking 7.5k jogging. I'm just weak. I had bad SPD in my third trimester, so my mobility was limited. I struggle getting up off the sofa whilst holding the baby. She does weigh 17lb though, her daddy is very tall.
  • momofamadhouse
    momofamadhouse Posts: 197 Member
    Sometimes the hardest part is getting over that mental block. I struggle with social anxiety. It took me 6 months of thinking about joining a gym to sign up, then about three weeks until I actually went. It's hard. But it DOES get easier.
  • pondee629
    pondee629 Posts: 2,469 Member
    Log onto FitnessBlender.com and do some of their body weight routines . The privacy of your own home with a good planned workout. A great way to get back into the swing.
  • not_a_runner
    not_a_runner Posts: 1,343 Member
    While I am a big advocate for adding some movement to any weightloss/fitness journey for many reasons, weight can be lost just by logging your food and being in a calorie deficit, without exercise. If going to the gym or trying new workouts sounds like too much at first, don't worry about it just yet. Get a handle on the food and logging part first. It can be overwhelming to try to master everything right away.
    There are also lots of little things you can add to your day which will add up too. Walk up/down the stairs a few extra times. Do some squats and lunges. Get on the floor with baby and do sit ups/push ups/etc. Anything to get you moving some more!
    Congrats on overcoming your fear and getting yourself to the gym! Usually the first few times are the hardest.
  • rockymouse
    rockymouse Posts: 25 Member
    You know, people at the gym aren't going to look at you and say to themselves - gee, that woman is big!
    They're going to say to themselves - gee, there's a woman who's making good changes in her life. She's one of us!
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,412 Member
    edited June 2016
    @darcyelizabeth If the gym is a meat market, I understand why you don't want to go back. Belly dance in your living room or buy a bike or whatever is fun.

    However, if it is a place where you meet friends and supportive people who will be inspired by your courage and your efforts, by all means put on your exercise clothes and don't let your feelings of shame keep you away from a healthy environment. Shame is a powerful emotion...I feel it too...but your wonderful body has functioned beautifully to bring a tiny human miracle into the world. Honor your fantastic body by letting go of shame and start nurturing yourself. Take care of it as well as you do your baby daughter. Your body is a great, amazing, gift! You go, girl!
  • darcyelizabeth
    darcyelizabeth Posts: 19 Member
    It's not really a gym full of posers to be honest, it's just my own insecurities and anxieties really.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    In my experience, gyms tend to have a lot of overweight members...so I doubt you'd be alone.
  • disasterman
    disasterman Posts: 746 Member
    I would think the folks at the gym would be happy you're back.
  • jlemoore
    jlemoore Posts: 702 Member
    The first time is going to be hard. The second time will be a little easier. Third time.... etc. You've got to just seize the day and do it.
  • mysticwryter
    mysticwryter Posts: 111 Member
    Girl, I feel you and so does everyone else on this board. If you don't feel comfortable going to the gym, then don't. Start working out from home. There are TONS of workout videos via YouTube that you can do at home, you can also get some help with proper nutrition and diets if need be. You can also contact nutritionist via online as well. When you get your confidence back and head to the gym, you'll be far far ahead than Average Joe who went to the gym for the first time.

    Get started on your water.....I drink 90-126oz of water/day (I'm very active and sweat my butt off when I go to the gym). Look at your macros (carbs,fat,protein) percentages (if you are at that point). If not, try foods that are low carb, just to get you started.

    I wish I was with you so that you wouldn't feel like this, you want to get better the first step is doing something about it. Good luck to you.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,961 Member
    darcyelizabeth wrote: »
    I never really thought of that to be honest. There's no way I'm doing couch to 5k on the streets though, that'd be worse than the treadmill ha. I guess I was hoping someone could give me some magical piece of advice that would make me confident again. But I know my confidence doesn't come back till I start shrinking. How shallow am I :s

    Then I suggest starting with a calorie deficit! You can lose plenty in 2-5 months, and head back to the gym then. If you want to fit in exercise, try some YouTube zumba, dance, yoga, Jillian Michaels, etc.
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,330 Member
    darcyelizabeth wrote: »
    Aw you guys are so kind! Thank you all so much! Really really means so much. I have been on such a downer about myself for such a long time now. With regards to c25k, I think I am doing it pretty slowly, it's in km's on the treadmill though, I was doing 5k an hour walking 7.5k jogging. I'm just weak. I had bad SPD in my third trimester, so my mobility was limited. I struggle getting up off the sofa whilst holding the baby. She does weigh 17lb though, her daddy is very tall.

    Well, when I first started it was 4k for the walking and 6k for the jogging. No shame in going slow. Actually even that was hard for me, so I started with this:
    http://www.jeffgalloway.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/conditioning-program-word.doc

    Good thing you went. Getting over the first day is the hardest part. All you need to do is make the leap, and you did.
  • angelwowings23
    angelwowings23 Posts: 128 Member
    There are a million different at-home workout programs or general DVDs you can do at home that will get you the same, or even better, results than you'd get at the gym. If you really can't bring yourself to go in, then maybe that's the best route for you. However, what I will say is this...the only person in the world you have to impress is yourself! If anyone in that gym would judge you on your appearance when you're there to better yourself, they aren't worth being concerned about.

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