Family nondieters
Monna2
Posts: 100 Member
Hello
my family are not dieters. I'm the only one.there's always sweets pastries and high calorie foods in the house. I don't know what to do it's so difficult to ignore the fact that there is a box of chocolate or a box of cookies in the other room or to ignore the ice cream in the fridge. I always fail .I know this is depleting my willpower but it's so unfair for me to always tell them not to buy such Foods .it's so selfish of me to do that but at the same time just can't find a way to continue my diet like this.
my family are not dieters. I'm the only one.there's always sweets pastries and high calorie foods in the house. I don't know what to do it's so difficult to ignore the fact that there is a box of chocolate or a box of cookies in the other room or to ignore the ice cream in the fridge. I always fail .I know this is depleting my willpower but it's so unfair for me to always tell them not to buy such Foods .it's so selfish of me to do that but at the same time just can't find a way to continue my diet like this.
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Replies
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It's your choice to overhaul your lifestyle so you are the one that will face the challenge when it comes to resisting treats. You shouldn't expect anyone else to support or adhere to your lifestyle.
It's a case of just saying no. You eating those treats is not someone else's failure for bringing them into the house; it's your failure in decision making as you could have said no but chose not to.
Obviously the key way to do things is to have a treat but keep to your calorie goal but the above is just to reiterate that it is down to you, and only you. It's your choice. No one forces you to eat treats. Just say no. Or treat in moderation.7 -
I hear you on this one. There are always crackers and cookies close by at home. I find it hard to resist them.
One thing that helps me is to try to think of that food as not belonging to me. It's not my food. Therefore eating it is not an option.
Doesn't always work but then I'll try a delay tactic. As in, yes, I know there's a pack of cookies in that cupboard, and yes I'm gonna eat them ALL. But in an half hour, not now. And then I'll repeat that tactic.
Sometimes you forget to go back. Sometimes the urge passes. Sometimes you eat! But try not to resent your family for eating yummy food.
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My fiance doesn't track calories or anything like that. Neither of us are "dieting," but I am more conscious of the foods I eat and I track the calories in my food. It wouldn't be fair of me to refuse to buy him the food he enjoys eating, just because I may not be able to resist it. I've just had to learn to ignore what I don't think I can fit into my calorie allowance for the day. I also buy comparable items that better fit my goals, such as regular ice cream for him and Arctic Zero ice cream for myself. Also, you'd be surprised what you can fit into your daily allowance if you track accurately and honestly, and weigh everything. I often want a small snack when I get home from work before dinner, so I measure out a half serving of Cheez Its, and I truly am satisfied with that amount. It may be more entertaining for you to find ways to fit in small treats/snacks, which could help you resist the urge to consume large amounts at one time. For me, the bottom line is that when I ate whatever I wanted in unlimited amounts, my body didn't make me happy, inside or out. So, I remember that whenever I feel the urge to eat anything and everything.3
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I'm the only one dieting in our household, my husband and two kids still eat sweets and ice cream, and other nice things. I just want to be thinner more than I want to eat those things, so I don't eat them, not even when someone offers me something.2
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Thank you, guys , for your advice.0
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I do all the shopping so my husband is at my mercy lol! But I do buy him treats that I know he likes. I just buy ones that are less tempting for me. Then I buy my own treats that fit my goals better. Klondike bars for him (so messy to eat!) And Yasso bars (yay, sticks!) for me. He takes a Little Debbie type snack to work each day. I don't buy my favorites for him. He's happy with Nutty Bars and Cosmic Brownies. And I'm happy the Oatmeal Cream Pies are still at the store.4
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My husband has always been pretty thin eating whatever he wants and he keeps all sorts of goodies in the house. I don't feel deprived because I tell myself I can have it if I want, but when I look at the calorie amounts I usually am disgusted at how many of my calories it would take up and then it's easy to say no and find something that's also yummy but takes way less of my calories for the day:)2
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I have a husband with a sweet tooth and four kids ages one year to nine years. Yeah, there's usually a good bit of "junk" in my house . That said, what I found helpful was going LCHF. It keeps my hunger under control, curbs my cravings, and so then I don't need massive amounts of will power to get through my day. I am full, satisfied, and know I can trust my hunger signals so when those little temptations crop up, I am able to make rational choices. As a nice bonus, after being low carb for a relatively short time (after about the first 6 weeks) I found my urge to snack pretty well disappeared and my tastes changed so a lot of the "junk" foods no longer have any real appeal. I will indulge once in a while, but it is a calculated, deliberate indulgence and I am able to have a sensible portion and end it, and get right back on track (something that was exceedingly difficult for me when I was simply counting calories). It may not work the same for you, but perhaps focusing on what you CAN have, and work on eating foods that you find more satiating will help you resist a lot of the "treats".1
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I'm not very tall. I have successfully used the technique of storing treats in a high cupboard. If they're not in my eye level I forget they're there!
However, I don't really need to do that any more. A combination of time and getting my head around the idea that there is no bad food - so (a) I can have the chocolate if I want it and (b) I don't need to eat it ALL because there will always be more. This takes time but does work.3 -
It really is hard but it's a good test for everything else that is tempting. I make sure I find stuff I like and can see as my treat to eat. I also will budget in a cookie when needed to keep cravings down without going overboard.0
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I also am the primary grocery shopper. Kids/hubs get regular snacks, I get my 100 calorie popcorn and weight watchers giant fudge pops (90 cals). You just have to figure out what works best for you - resisting temptation or treating once in a while. I used to get mad at hubs for bringing oreos and other delicious things into the house, but coming here helped me see that this is my journey, and I need to be better at it. He still brings oreos in, and I still have them sometimes. Just not a line.
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I suggest getting Duhigg's book on Habit. Figure out what your triggers are and come up with strategies to deflect them. You may need multiple strategies. I like the high shelf idea, or perhaps a designated spot where your family keeps treats (if they'll go along with it).
There's a technique for obsessives to stop intruding thoughts. It's described here. Not that you are obsessive, but you are surrounded by temptation.
Take up a non-food activity to keep your hands busy, like knitting. It is very hard to eat chips and knit at the same time.
I'll use any technique to help me gain control.1 -
My family doesn't diet at all, and my boyfriend doesn't either - there is always delicious food to be had on the counters, in the fridge and pantry - I even take them to drive thrus and order food for them.
It's not fair to force others to adhere to your lifestyle - it's important to find some sort of motivation that will allow you to say no thank you and walk away.
For me I internally think how many calories whatever I'm offered will be, and I think of how far I would have to run in order to work that off ( you would have to run 1.5 miles to burn off the calories from that donut!) The thought of the energy I would need to expend to work off a few minutes of stuffing my face is usually enough for me to say no.
I also buy mini-treats so that I'm less inclined to eat regular treats. My boyfriend gets pints and normal sized ice cream cones. I get mini swirl cones, frozen bananas, or fudgicles that are usually under 150 calories each. He gets big bags of chips, I get a 50 cent bag of chips that is one serving, or I have an air popper and I get popcorn with nothing added on. When I do stop by my parents I always cut my portions in half and bring a doggy bag home which keeps my calories in check with the amount of butter, meat and cheese they add to everything.
It gets easier, and more often than not some of your good habits rub off on people. My boyfriend now has a salad with me every night now at dinner
Weight loss is 80 % diet, 20% exercise and 100% mental
Good luck!1 -
My husband is not actively trying to lose weight atm and 2 of my 3 girls are underweight so they definitely have treats in the house- hell I made the bigs a summer fruit cake that smelled like heaven on the weekend. But I choose not to eat these things because my ultimate fitness goals are more important to me. It has very little to do with the other people in your family and everything to do with your own mental fortitude. Choose yourself over bag-of-cookie sabotage OP, you are worth it1
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my husband and son aren't counting calories...
I buy the groceries
I buy the treats they love and want even if I love them too
I say no to myself or prelog the treat and make it fit.
I bake all the time for them
I cook wonderful food for them and eat it too...for example thai chicken with noodles...or strawberry rhubarb pie or shortcake.
I refuse to force my lifestyle choices on those in the house esp my husband...he works and is entitled to have whatever he wants in the house.3 -
My trick with this is I set aside calories a few days a week for a sweet treat. Lately it has been those Mini Magnum ice creams. They are 170-190 depending on which one it is. I've been losing just fine still eating sweet things as long as it fits within my calories. Other than that, I just think about how bad I want to lose the weight whenever I see sweets on the counter from my husband or kids.0
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I do all the shopping so my husband is at my mercy lol! But I do buy him treats that I know he likes. I just buy ones that are less tempting for me. Then I buy my own treats that fit my goals better. Klondike bars for him (so messy to eat!) And Yasso bars (yay, sticks!) for me. He takes a Little Debbie type snack to work each day. I don't buy my favorites for him. He's happy with Nutty Bars and Cosmic Brownies. And I'm happy the Oatmeal Cream Pies are still at the store.
I love oatmeal cream pies! But that's besides the point of this whole thread0 -
My husband is a non dieter and doesn't need to lose weight, so there's always yummy calorie laden treats within reach.
It's easier said than done, but willpower is your only option and honestly mine sucks, especially in the last couple of months for some reason. But the more you fight it the easier it will get to resist temptation.
I go to bed early so I'm not tempted to snack, i just read or watch tv in my bedroom instead of the living room which is right next to the kitchen. I save as many calories as i can for dinner and dessert, and if it didn't keep me up at night my secret weapon would be to drink big mugs of milky tea or coffee after dinner, both of these curb my appetite and fill me up with sloshy water.2 -
I keep my snacks in one cabinet, and kids snacks in another. Then when i want a treat, I'm looking ONLY in my cabinet, or my drawer in the fridge. Also, I allow for treats like drive thrus, ice cream, etc. I've learned to downsize, and have a small scoop of ice cream, or a small burger, etc, what ever will fit in my cals for the day. I don't do this all the time, or I'd be pretty hungry.
Like mentioned above, a few approaches for different situations does help. Out of site, out of mind works good most of the time for me.1 -
My husband isn't actively trying to lose weight (but he needs to...I digress) and he likes his sodas, chips, girl scout cookies, crackers, etc. I had to learn to not eat the foods. That's it. I told myself "no," over and over until I learned it wasn't a good idea for me to eat them.
If your family was pushing you to eat those foods, and were purposefully sabotaging your efforts I'd say yeah they need to be more supportive and/or back off. It doesn't sound like and it's a matter of resisting those foods.0 -
If by "family" you mean parents + siblings, it's tough - can't do much about it. But if you mean husband and children it would be in your family's best interest if you managed to slowly convert them to a lifestyle where cookies and donuts don't just lie around.3
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I was able to get my mind to a place where I prefer healthy foods. I am no longer worried about foods that don't make me feel good. I believe this is why I am finally experiencing real success (down 20, 20 more to go, started on April 18)0
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wisdomfromyou wrote: »If by "family" you mean parents + siblings, it's tough - can't do much about it. But if you mean husband and children it would be in your family's best interest if you managed to slowly convert them to a lifestyle where cookies and donuts don't just lie around.
Junk food is junk food no matter if it's eaten by a skinny person or not! But anyway, my wife has learned which treats she loves and I hate. I trained her to buy those by eating all the "good stuff" before she could get around to it
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It's your choice to overhaul your lifestyle so you are the one that will face the challenge when it comes to resisting treats. You shouldn't expect anyone else to support or adhere to your lifestyle.
It's a case of just saying no. You eating those treats is not someone else's failure for bringing them into the house; it's your failure in decision making as you could have said no but chose not to.
Obviously the key way to do things is to have a treat but keep to your calorie goal but the above is just to reiterate that it is down to you, and only you. It's your choice. No one forces you to eat treats. Just say no. Or treat in moderation.
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Prelog your food. Seriously, it helps. Last night my MIL ( bless her heart) brought a cheesecake. My hubby and son dove into it. I wanted a piece so bad that I even got it out of the fridge but when I tried to log it, for some reason I couldn't connect to the server. I have a policy, if I can't (fairly) accuratly log it, I don't eat it. I put it back in the fridge and the craving passed.
Today, if they haven't eaten it already and I can log it, I can still have a piece if I want it.
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wisdomfromyou wrote: »If by "family" you mean parents + siblings, it's tough - can't do much about it. But if you mean husband and children it would be in your family's best interest if you managed to slowly convert them to a lifestyle where cookies and donuts don't just lie around.
why? what is wrong with cookies and donuts?4 -
We keep the high calorie treats in a separate cupboard so I do not see them unless I deliberately need to open that cupboard. I only take a treat once it has been logged on my diary so I know how much of my calorie budget it will take up and if it fits my macro nutrient goals. Then I decide if it's worth it or not. I usually get one treat a day (I am not losing weight anymore, just maintaining though).0
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I feel you. I have zero will power around yummy things and do best when I simply keep them out of the house - but when that's not an option because the SO does love his kettle chips and peanut m&ms. For me, I find I stick with a healthier lifestyle if I indulge just a little bit, but how to keep it as "just a little bit" is the trick. Typically I find it best to read the labor, figure out how many/much of a servicing size I want and for into my daily goals, put only that much on my plate, pack the treat way and go enjoy my snack somewhere else. I enjoy it, get a treat, but I don't sit there eating out of the bag/box ( because left to my own devices, I definitely would) Hope that helps a little0
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