This is me now at 24st 1lb I hate myself

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Replies

  • joans1976
    joans1976 Posts: 2,201 Member
    Good!
  • lenoresdream
    lenoresdream Posts: 522 Member
    Hey listen don't hate yourself! You deserve love and that includes self love. You started a journey to healthy and that's amazing. Stay strong, okay? Love yourself <3
  • beachgal0626
    beachgal0626 Posts: 1,912 Member
    jrobertson290365 wrote: »
    Thank you Joans1976, your right everyone here is awesome and so supportive to me today I've just completed my diary for today and If every day were like today I'd weigh 22 st 10 lbs in 5 weeks so here's hoping and fingers crossed

    You're doing great, keep it up! No matter what you lose in the next weeks, months, it's a victory! Keep being proud of yourself and please keep us posted!
  • Osiris275
    Osiris275 Posts: 228 Member
    That's a great loss, well done :)

    You can definitely keep it up.
  • beachgal0626
    beachgal0626 Posts: 1,912 Member
    jrobertson290365 wrote: »
    smantha32 wrote: »
    jrobertson290365 wrote: »
    Thank you everyone for your advice and support, I have been told by my wife that i'm too hard on myself and I need to stop it as i'm going to do myself damage but after seeing that photo of myself today really shocked me as I never thought of myself like that before.

    I'm just not happy and don't know what I can do, I am disabled with chronic back pain and use a walking stick when I go out a few weeks ago I had to go to the doctor who referred me to the Rapid Access Chest Pain Clinic due to having chest pains and shortness of breath.

    Thankfully the tests on my heart came back clear and I got told I have Pre-Diabetes and need to lose weight, since getting that news I have pushed and pushed to try and walk more to exercise and I can only manage about 0.8 miles but i'm desperate to get over the 1 mile point of walking and just can't do it.

    So I feel like i'm burning myself out as my mind is telling me I need to walk more because i'm too fat and ugly but my bodies telling me I can't do it because of the pain i'm in but if I rest up i'm frightened I'll seize up.

    I saw this video by a disabled person who lost over 100 pounds doing yoga after he was injured in the military. Maybe this would help you too.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX9FSZJu448

    i just watched the video, thank you Samantha for sharing with me all I can say is WOW, well done that guy, it's made me even more determined to fight this, infact I'm actually surprised with myself as we bought a pork roasting joint for sunday dinner and as you know it always has the big piece of fat on it, well I usually eat all that fat once the joints been cooked but today even looking at it made me actually feel sick, I refused to eat it cut it all off and it's now in the dogs bowl instead of my stomach. :smiley:

    Good for you! And your dog is probably happy, too! I have watched that video in the past, from a different forum/post -- it IS excellent and gave me goosebumps.
  • scotth34
    scotth34 Posts: 1 Member
    Stay out of dark places. Feed your mind as well as your body with good mental and physical nutrition.
  • ellenaj52
    ellenaj52 Posts: 18 Member
    I was just diagnosed with type 2 diabetes this past February. My grandmother, mother, uncle, and sister
    had the disease. I had to see a diabetic nutritionist. I am ignoring most of the advice she gave me as she
    was telling me I could have 2-4 servings of carb per meal!@ I could have told her that is too much! I have
    lowered my carbs to about 20% per day. This comes out to be (one carb is equivalent to 15 grams of ca
    carbohydrate per meal.) about 75 grams of carbohydrate per day and no more at this point. I am losing
    slowly for the first time in my life....I follow the advice of Doctor Mark Hyman. You can google him. Do
    not eat low\-fat, but instead include some healthy fats at each meal. Exercise as much as you can, eat
    regular meals. Do not over feed at one meal. Too much food at one time even from healthy alternatives
    can raise your blood sugar. Fat does not cause heart disease. They have proven that to be false it is the
    sugar and carb that is the culprit. I am on no medication...and hope to keep it that way!
  • llbrixon
    llbrixon Posts: 964 Member
    Take small steps in your diet. In the beginning, I gave up my 6 cans of Mt. Dews, I actually wean myself off of them. Then I cut out my late night snacking. I did a lot of little things first to improve my diet. In the beginning, I was basically only walking the dogs for exercise. Once I started getting serious about walking, I walked only 10-15 minutes. I slowly increased my walking time, distance, and speed of walking.

    You can do this! Put that anger in prepping your mind that you will succeed with your new plan of eating. Think of this as a life style change. Once you lose your weight, then the job of maintenance starts.
  • jrobertson290365
    jrobertson290365 Posts: 81 Member
    Thanks everyone, I haven't been out to exercise the past few days due to being too sore but today I wanted to go out a walk and it's now too bloody hot with the temperature being over 28c and I get very short of breath in this heat, so hopefully the temperature will cool down later tonight and then I can.
  • Latucker21
    Latucker21 Posts: 126 Member
    Good for you posting a picture you dislike in an effort to make changes. Be proud of that and love yourself where you are. The world is hard enough without our own self shame. You're here. You're doing it. One step at a time, one day at a time. My only recommendation is to keep going for the long haul, even when there are slip ups and set backs along the way, get back on it. And you have a huge group of support here.
  • runningforthetrain
    runningforthetrain Posts: 1,037 Member
    I think there is a disabled group here on MFP- It is always so helpful to get encouragement from people who struggle with similar issues: http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/105886-diet-and-disability
  • ceceblackstock327
    ceceblackstock327 Posts: 40 Member
    7lbs in two weeks is amazing!! I read one of those inspirational quotes the other day, and it said "the hard part isn't getting your body in shape, it's getting your mind in shape" I know it's hard, but I would encourage you to be kinder and patient with yourself as you go through this change... Wow! 7 in 2.. Amazing!!
  • niblue
    niblue Posts: 339 Member
    jrobertson290365 wrote: »
    Thanks everyone, I haven't been out to exercise the past few days due to being too sore but today I wanted to go out a walk and it's now too bloody hot with the temperature being over 28c and I get very short of breath in this heat, so hopefully the temperature will cool down later tonight and then I can.

    I'm in Aberdeen today and the weather is horrible - hopefully it'll clear up later and you can get out for your walk.
  • Whitezombiegirl
    Whitezombiegirl Posts: 1,042 Member
    Think about things this way- you obviously don't hate yourself as much as you think you do. You value yourself enough come here and start the process of change. This is a healing process.

    In general terms- 'You' are not fat- you 'have' fat. It doesn't say anything about you- it just is what it is. Its totally fixable - just takes time time and consistency- and enough self-love to put good things into your body and to get back on the wagon if you fall off. (we all do- intentionally and unintentionally) This is one foot in front of the other foot stuff- and before you realise it , you'll be running (figuratively speaking).
  • MaryLuvsTheLamb
    MaryLuvsTheLamb Posts: 98 Member
    i've lost 7lb in 2 weeks. 8b4ri9kp1yet.jpg
    [/quote]

    That is a totally awesome start, my friend! Please don't indulge in self hatred. Be angry with poor choices, as we all are, but the good news is that you're here and you have begun a wonderful journey full of surprises around every corner. Best wishes to you and please know that we are here for you and we are ALL on the same journey. :)
  • jrobertson290365
    jrobertson290365 Posts: 81 Member
    Just thought I'd share a photo comparison of me 15 years ago this September and one of me taken yesterday.

    v8ph4z.jpg
  • SwindonJogger
    SwindonJogger Posts: 325 Member
    jrobertson290365 wrote: »

    A few weeks ago I was eating like a full 6 pack of potato crisps and I could have a full chinese takeaway curry with 2 fried rices and all the extras like pancake rolls etc but I have now cut myself down I had half of a breast of chicken curry and half of a boiled rice as a treat which is only going to be maybe once a month or every other month with no extras and I was totally feeling full even after what I had.

    I have also cut right down with my meals during the week and don't eat sweets or crisps (well maybe 1 pack of 97 cal potato crisps once or twice a week instead of per night

    This is the right approach, small changes that you can keep to.
    Keep making those small adjustments to your diet and the weight will come off.
    I'd recommend getting a step counter/pedometer and trying to increase the number of daily steps you can do in a day. You'd be suprised how motivating this can be. Pretty soon a mile walking will be childs play.
    And don't be too hard on your self, 7lbs in 2 weeks is a great start.

  • jrobertson290365
    jrobertson290365 Posts: 81 Member
    SwindonJogger wrote: »
    jrobertson290365 wrote: »

    A few weeks ago I was eating like a full 6 pack of potato crisps and I could have a full chinese takeaway curry with 2 fried rices and all the extras like pancake rolls etc but I have now cut myself down I had half of a breast of chicken curry and half of a boiled rice as a treat which is only going to be maybe once a month or every other month with no extras and I was totally feeling full even after what I had.

    I have also cut right down with my meals during the week and don't eat sweets or crisps (well maybe 1 pack of 97 cal potato crisps once or twice a week instead of per night

    This is the right approach, small changes that you can keep to.
    Keep making those small adjustments to your diet and the weight will come off.
    I'd recommend getting a step counter/pedometer and trying to increase the number of daily steps you can do in a day. You'd be suprised how motivating this can be. Pretty soon a mile walking will be childs play.
    And don't be too hard on your self, 7lbs in 2 weeks is a great start.

    I use Map My Walk on my phone I think that has a step counter on it but it doesn't have a section for people using a walking stick
  • SwindonJogger
    SwindonJogger Posts: 325 Member
    does't matter, just look at the number of steps you have done in a day and use that as your goal for the next day to beat.
    i recommended a cheap pedometer as you can clip it to your clothes and forget it is on. Steps you do around the house all count and this is where you can become more active. For example, when watching tv, use the advert breaks as a marker to walk to the kitchen and back.
  • AndyJBacon
    AndyJBacon Posts: 43 Member
    edited July 2016
    You know, a pic I hated motivated me to lose weight back in the day. I didn't realize I looked like that. I kept it by my nightstand, and anytime I felt like not working out, I'd pic it up, briefly look it over, and go hit the stair climber for 45 minutes. It worked, and if it works for you, keep a negative picture. And think ahead to when you get to post your "after" transformation picture.

    I don't have much advice though, other than to do what you can. If you can't walk well, can you do something else active? Wheelchair and roll your miles? Rowing a canoe? Resistance bands, yoga ball, gardening, fishing? Any movement is a bonus. I took doing/folding laundry away from my wife and mowing the lawn from my son this year, just for the movement and calorie burn. They didn't complain. :)
  • lapierrecyclist
    lapierrecyclist Posts: 153 Member
    Welcome! Many of us have been where you are. Keep up with the walking if your back will allow you. Everyone has to start somewhere, and I think 0.8 miles per walk is a great start for you. I would say just keep doing that distance until it gets a little easier, don't worry about pushing yourself past it yet. That will come in time. It's early days yet. Best wishes to you and I am glad your wife is supportive also.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,744 Member
    Great work so far! Walking is one of the best things you can do, so keep at it!

    I know about dealing with the heat though, but don't let that stop you. You can walk in-place in your air conditioned living room or do arm circles and leg lifts while sitting down, etc. Just move the body parts that you can and are comfortable with as much as possible.
  • CorneliusPhoton
    CorneliusPhoton Posts: 965 Member
    Just think, as you lose weight, walking will probably become easier and easier! You are on track and have made a great positive change in your life. You should be proud of yourself! Keep moving! Your body was MADE for it.
  • SueSueDio
    SueSueDio Posts: 4,796 Member
    jrobertson290365 wrote: »
    I pushed myself to the limit today by going 2 walks and the funny thing is I actually feel pretty good, just wait until later when the pain sets in it'll be a different story LOL.

    That's awesome, and I hope you aren't in too much pain now! Keep doing whatever you can manage and don't push yourself too hard, it will get easier with time and practice. :)
  • Zinka61
    Zinka61 Posts: 563 Member
    I think many of us got to the point where we hated how we looked, but as others have said, don't extend that to hating your *self*. I found that the weight began coming off very quickly just by following my MFP calories goal, logging every single thing I ate, measuring portions. Very quickly you'll start to feel so much more in control of your health. I see people losing large amounts of weight on here, well over 100 lbs in some cases. It's absolutely inspiring what we are accomplishing here. Find some friends, let MFP guide you in choosing a calorie goal, and start feeling happy that you are taking action. Fingers crossed for you, too!
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