Why oh why do I sabotage myself?

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Replies

  • Dsjava
    Dsjava Posts: 8 Member
    DebSozo wrote: »
    Newbie troubles. Such great advice and comments to my post, but now, how do I reply directly to the thread?

    Just push the quote button on the bottom left of the person's post.

    Thanks for asking this question. I just joined yesterday and this is a helpful tip.
  • Dsjava
    Dsjava Posts: 8 Member
    nancy1465 wrote: »
    First off...congratulations on getting married...so exciting! We have all been in the same place as you which is why we are all together here. I am a Monday dieter and seem to give up mid week for years! A few over weight people I know got strokes recently and I also saw some pics of me which turned my head around. My daughter is getting married next year and I want to look good in her pics. So this is my first time on MFP . I find if I log on every day and read all my food labels and up my water intake, I am being successful this time round. I do indulge in a few treats and YES it is hard to just stop at a few. I have been here 5 weeks now and yesterday was probably one of the first days I felt full and wasnt hungry. So it took my stomach that long to finally start shrinking. All the best with your weight loss. You will get there! smile:

    Just started yesterday -- and one of the reasons is as you state -- I saw photos of myself and couldn't believe the disparity between what I "thought" I looked like in my head (40 pounds ago...) and today's reality. But I feel encouraged to just take it one pound at a time. Having a special event as a goal is a great idea! Best of luck!
  • BAFCH
    BAFCH Posts: 23 Member

    This is more common than you think. The good news is that after a very short time these things become less appealing. Some people even stop liking them all together...for instance tea with sugar tastes gross to me now even though I used to drink it all day long every day.

    Yep, I know. I can't even eat a chocolate bar without feeling sick now. I'm just hoping to get to the same place with potatoes/chips/crisps.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    I have periods of time when I am so focused and manage really well. But once I fall off the wagon that's it! It's so hard to get back on! Every day I tell myself today is the day and I start off with the best intentions only to ruin it by the end of the day. Why can't I stop myself from reaching for the crisps/chocolate/ice cream? I know I would never stop having them completely and I like to have a little of what I fancy every day but I can't stop at a little bit lately :/ why??? I'm getting married next September and have around 80 pounds to lose. It's not going to happen at this rate :/

    My engagement brought me (back) to MFP as well - it was the thought of wedding photos that did it for me.

    I've found macros and timing help me quite a bit - if I eat more protein and less carbs, I want less carbs. If I save treats for after dinner, I don't overindulge.

    I've learned what foods I can moderate. Those I can't, I do not have in the house.

    Getting sufficient sleep and exercise helps eliminate cravings for me as well.

    Finally, I use the cognitive behavioral techniques that helped me stop abusing alcohol, mainly the Addictive Voice Recognition. The voice that says "You deserve..." does not have my best interests at heart.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    How largo of a deficit do you give yourself? For me, if I have too large of a deficit, I end up in a binge and just maintain. I lose weight slower with a small deficit but I feel more satisfied and I don't end up in a binge.

    @Tashlovesfood this is a really good point - an over-aggressive deficit leads to binges for many people.

  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    Maybe stop putting a judgement or deadline on your weight. Don't call yourself a fat bride if you don't drop 80 lbs. You are the person your partner wants to marry right now. You are a happy bride, a blushing bride, an energetic bride, a radiant bride- why associate officially joining your life with your partner's life with negativity? A wedding is one day. Lose weight to be your healthiest and enjoy the rest of your life to the fullest because you deserve that.
    Get rid of the emotional baggage of food being good or bad. Eat mostly nutritient dense foods because it is treating your body right to meet your nutritional needs which keeps you healthier.
    There is no cart to fall off of. Every single day you start fresh with your food and activity choices. In the bigger picture if you stick to your calorie deficit most days you will lose weight. If you stick to your calorie deficit every single day your progress will be faster.

    I find pre-logging my whole day helps me to stick to my goals better.

    Congratulations on your engagement and upcoming wedding!
  • wenkell22
    wenkell22 Posts: 25 Member
    Lounmoun wrote: »
    Maybe stop putting a judgement or deadline on your weight. Don't call yourself a fat bride if you don't drop 80 lbs. You are the person your partner wants to marry right now. You are a happy bride, a blushing bride, an energetic bride, a radiant bride- why associate officially joining your life with your partner's life with negativity? A wedding is one day. Lose weight to be your healthiest and enjoy the rest of your life to the fullest because you deserve that.
    Get rid of the emotional baggage of food being good or bad. Eat mostly nutritient dense foods because it is treating your body right to meet your nutritional needs which keeps you healthier.
    There is no cart to fall off of. Every single day you start fresh with your food and activity choices. In the bigger picture if you stick to your calorie deficit most days you will lose weight. If you stick to your calorie deficit every single day your progress will be faster.

    I find pre-logging my whole day helps me to stick to my goals better.

    Congratulations on your engagement and upcoming wedding!


    This is fabulous advice for everyone…not just the bride to be! I feel all inspired now! :-)
  • Tashlovesfood
    Tashlovesfood Posts: 51 Member
    Thanks everyone. Not gonna lie I'm still struggling. It's like part of me doesn't want me to succeed. You've all given me some fab advice and yes, maybe I should stop putting a number or putting myself down. I need to turn a page and start fresh
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,149 Member
    Most of the time, I can eat my sweets/desserts/chips/chocolate as 1 serving and be fine. I still have times where I just want it all NOW PLS. What helps me is "I can have more tomorrow" and even pre-logging to include it. I log my daily snacks every morning - diet pop, gum, and chocolate coffee beans. I make sure I have a dessert or sweet every day to keep my hind brain calmed down.

    I learned through my own mistakes and listening to people on MFP that my diet/day wasn't in the toilet because I ate the whole bag of chips/cookies/candy bar. It was one day/week and I can turn it around. You're a good person. You're not "bad" or "naughty" for eating those chips or cookies or what have you. Being engaged and dealing with the wedding prep is quite stressful and yeah, some days you're going to eat stuff that's "bad", but make sure those kinds of days are few and the "on target" days are more.
    hey-girl-whos-awesome-you-thumb.jpg
  • Tashlovesfood
    Tashlovesfood Posts: 51 Member
    I LOVE RYAN GOSLING!
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  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    Bottom line is that you have to want to lose weight more than the chocolate and crisps.

    The key for me was a reasonable goal (1 lb a week - I wanted to lose 80 pounds too), and I had to learn to cook. You're less likely to look for comfort food when you have tasty meals.