Any way for me, my husband, and a picky eater to be happy?

Hello! 23 year old 2-time mom here. My question is a little complicated. I am currently 171lbs at 5'5" (yikes) I had a baby two months ago but I know that's not a good excuse since I was 145 pre-pregnancy and I know I should have dropped at least most of what I gained. I've lost 10 pounds of pregnancy weight, most of it in the last two weeks. I've quit fast food, soda, and started counting calories. It's had some fair results for me but the issue is making my diet work with the rest of the family. My husband, on the other hand, isn't happy with how small he is. He doesn't want to do a weight-loss diet, he would rather do some sort of protein diet that would help him bulk up, which is the opposite of what I want. And in between all of this, we have a 6 year old autistic son that has SO MANY issues with food. The stuff he eats without throwing up is all the stuff I don't want to keep in the house anymore. We've been trying to wean him off the hot dogs, boxed mac and cheese, and other fried foods and it's working slowly but surely, but he's still stuck on a few different meals. Mainly spaghetti and tacos, and occasionally cheeseburgers.

I was just wondering if there was ANY diet that could work weight-loss, muscle gain, and still be sort of yummy looking. My son will eat most stuff that's in tortillas or if we can convince him it's another version of one of his favorite foods. (He'll eat breaded cauliflower if we tell him it's like a vegetable chicken nugget, that sort of thing. Or he'll eat a bite of cucumber if we tell him it's a pickle chip.) My only other option is cooking three different dinners, and with a newborn I can only imagine that will get too expensive too fast.

TL;DR: What foods are good for weight loss AND muscle gain, without making a 6 year old throw up?

SOS!

Replies

  • doittoitgirl
    doittoitgirl Posts: 157 Member
    My husband and I eat the same dinners. I divide them into three servings and then he takes two and I take one serving. He's trying to Bulk up and I'm trying to slim down. We pick dinner the night before and if I'm making something and it's not enough cals for him he just eats more for breakfast and lunch. Also what helps me is spending 2-3hrs one day prepping stuff for meals for the week so there is always something easy on hand and we can coordinate meals that fit each our dietary needs. I don't have a child though so I don't have advice there. But I imagine having a batch of precooked noodles, veggies, and proteins in advance would make it less stressful to cook different meals.
  • savithny
    savithny Posts: 1,200 Member
    First: nine months on, nine months off.
    Second: Husbands who don't like what you're cooking can go back to the kitchen and make themselves a protein shake or a sandwich.
    Third: My kids aren't too picky and aren't autistic (which I knwo comes with sensory issues that can complicate eating), but they have their issues. I serve a lot of foods that can be assembled at table with just the parts that the person wants: I pull a plain pasta portion for the kid who doesn't like the sauce I'm using, for example, and then put in all the sauce/toppings for the rest of us. We have tacos with options for filling - beans, meat, cheese, veggies - and everyone puts in what they want. (I do require a ceremonial taste of veggies for my neurotypical kids).
  • NorthCascades
    NorthCascades Posts: 10,970 Member
    My girlfriend and I are in a similar situation. We live together and prefer to eat together. She's losing weight, while I'm gaining to build muscle. So, mostly, we eat the same things but I have larger portions. I have a protein shake after dinner, and try to get as much as I can throughout the day - we only eat breakfast together except on weekends.
  • capaul42
    capaul42 Posts: 1,390 Member
    Perhaps because I don't know the inner workings of your family I don't see a conflict here.

    First, high-protein diets are great for losing weight and feeling full while you do it. If you cook dinner for you and your hubby, he can just choose to eat more of it than you. Or he can eat more of the protein and carbs, and you can eat more of the protein and vegetable (I make those divisions because that's what I do with my muscly 6'7" partner who eats a ton). That's his responsibility how much he puts on his fork.

    Second, in terms of your son, I imagine you're already talking to a doctor about this, and how much you should be pushing him to eat different foods. But if you make him Kraft or other quick meals, you don't necessarily have to eat them as well. And say you do make spaghetti for him - great, then add some veggies and chicken sausage to your portion and call it a meal. I ate that all the time while losing weight (125 lbs).

    I hope this helps!

    This is pretty much the same advice I'd give. I've been in the same situation. I've been losing since january and my partner (with crohn's) has been trying to maintain/bulk. My daughter (autistic) is also a picky eater. We cook much the same as we always did. I add veggies or salads to my dinners and usually my partner has twice the servings as me.
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,943 Member
    Dexidah wrote: »
    Hello! 23 year old 2-time mom here. My question is a little complicated. I am currently 171lbs at 5'5" (yikes) I had a baby two months ago but I know that's not a good excuse since I was 145 pre-pregnancy and I know I should have dropped at least most of what I gained. I've lost 10 pounds of pregnancy weight, most of it in the last two weeks. I've quit fast food, soda, and started counting calories. It's had some fair results for me but the issue is making my diet work with the rest of the family. My husband, on the other hand, isn't happy with how small he is. He doesn't want to do a weight-loss diet, he would rather do some sort of protein diet that would help him bulk up, which is the opposite of what I want. And in between all of this, we have a 6 year old autistic son that has SO MANY issues with food. The stuff he eats without throwing up is all the stuff I don't want to keep in the house anymore. We've been trying to wean him off the hot dogs, boxed mac and cheese, and other fried foods and it's working slowly but surely, but he's still stuck on a few different meals. Mainly spaghetti and tacos, and occasionally cheeseburgers.

    I was just wondering if there was ANY diet that could work weight-loss, muscle gain, and still be sort of yummy looking. My son will eat most stuff that's in tortillas or if we can convince him it's another version of one of his favorite foods. (He'll eat breaded cauliflower if we tell him it's like a vegetable chicken nugget, that sort of thing. Or he'll eat a bite of cucumber if we tell him it's a pickle chip.) My only other option is cooking three different dinners, and with a newborn I can only imagine that will get too expensive too fast.

    TL;DR: What foods are good for weight loss AND muscle gain, without making a 6 year old throw up?

    SOS!

    First of all, hang in there. :)

    Secondly, there is nothing wrong any food at all. You can eat whatever you want and still lose weight, just as your husband can eat whatever he wants and put on weight.

    For you: just eat less of the foods you love.
    For hubby: he eats more of the foods he loves.
    For little cutie pie: you're in charge of that one, but I'd suggest making those hot dogs, mac & cheese, etc. occasional meal time treats for him.

    The above will work if you simply find foods you all three like, with some variation for personal preference.
  • JenHuedy
    JenHuedy Posts: 611 Member
    Most of our family meals consist of a protein, a veggie (or 2 or 3) and a starch. I portion my plate to meet my needs, and the rest of the family portions to meet theirs.

    For example, tonight is sirloin tip roast, baked potato and asparagus. I've already looked at what I need for protein and how many calories for the day after logging my breakfast and lunch, so I'm going to have around 100g of roast and I'll skip the potato (because I'm not a huge fan) and have double veggies (maybe with some blue cheese crumbled on top!). Hubby is 6'7" tall and works outside, and the kids are both high school boys. They will eat it all, plus obscene amounts of toppings on their potatoes. And then ask me what's for dessert!

    For something like spaghetti, you can make the sauce, meat and pasta separately (possibly make yourself some veggie "noodles" ) then portion everyone an amount that suits them.

    Casseroles can be tricky, but I don't worry about meeting macros exactly every day. I just take whatever will fit my calories and move on.

    As far as picky eaters, I can't add a whole lot. Mine have always been pretty good. Since they were 7 or 8 or so they've been given the option of eating what I make or making themselves a PB&J sandwich or warming up some leftovers. I think that has only happened a handful of times in the last 8-10 years.
  • TarahByte
    TarahByte Posts: 125 Member
    My girlfriend and I are in a similar situation. We live together and prefer to eat together. She's losing weight, while I'm gaining to build muscle. So, mostly, we eat the same things but I have larger portions. I have a protein shake after dinner, and try to get as much as I can throughout the day - we only eat breakfast together except on weekends.

    We do the same. We eat the same foods but the boyf drinks that weight gainer stuff before breakfast every day and protein shakes when he works out.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,262 Member
    We all eat the same meals. Our portion sizes just differ.
  • CoachJen71
    CoachJen71 Posts: 1,200 Member
    edited July 2016
    My kids have sensory issues. I spent years making them separate meals, so completely understand your concerns about time and cost! I now make food that works for the health conscious people, and everyone else fends for themselves, but for years elder son would literally only eat Cheerios, and younger wasn't much better. It took a very long time, but they have expanded their menu. The battle these days is they are so lazy they would rather starve than make the effort to feed themselves. But they are teens, so that's their problem.

    Just do what you can to make food available to everyone, and don't beat yourself up if you take shortcuts with prepackaged stuff. Kids can still grow on that, and you are doing a great job sneaking in those veggies! *hugs* Not sure if it is an option for you, but we made use of our local food pantry quite a bit when our income was low.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    Make what you normally cook for the family. Your husband could supplement with protein shakes or take in more protein during his meals. If you are trying to lose, then you eat less than you burn. Use a food scale to weigh your food for most accurate results.

    You eat less. Husband eats more. Kid is happy.