Fighting with myself.

Eating only 90 cal a day? Hunny your body is starving. It doesn't have food to burn off that extra weight you're wanting it to burn.

You should never apologize for expressing how you feel! I hope you find your happy, healthy place.

I feel the same way as her! I have been working my butt off just to see no weight or inches off in over a month!

I'm hoping that for both of us, we are just building muscle right now, and soon it will start to eat off some of the weight.

Definitly see a nutrionalist. I did, and she set me straight. Every day for me is a struggle because I was always like "Idk why I;m not losing weight, I hardly eat." Then the nutrionalist had me do a food journal and I was shocked at what I was eating and not realizing it. It may not have been alot but it was junk. Plus she said I was starving my body so it was hording what little weight I had so I wasn't losing it. Always remember the road to happiness is always a struggle because its worth fighting for. The easy way out is jus that: Easy and not worth it in the end. Plus your body hits a plateu after awhile and you have to dig deeper and diet harder and excercise just a little bit more to get over that hump. You can do it , we are all rooting for you.

I am stuck right now too, I haven't lost anything for a month and it is frustrating because I am working out, and eating healthy. I guess I just need to be patient.
Don't resort to not eating, I had an eating disorder for almost 20 years and is messed up my metabolism, my mind and took years to recover from. I've done the not eating, it does not work long term and it really is not worth it. Plateaus eventually end, or so I am told and I am going to tough it out and I hope you will too.:flowerforyou:

It may sound strange but by eating too little you can actually put on weight as (in fairly simple un-scientific terms) your body starts to panic that it will starve if you only feed it 90kcal a day - your body has no idea when it'll get a full days worth of food so slows down burning of calories to retain as much stored energy (aka fat) so that your body can continue to function whilst not getting very much calorie intake. Muscle is often converted into fat to allow even more energy stores - undoing all your hard work!

If you want to give your metabolism a kick start you could try calorie zig-zagging (there are loads of posts on here about it) where some days you eat lots and some days little ie, 1700-1400-1200-1700-1350-1200-1400.
The high intake days mean your metabolism has to step it up a notch which then carries over onto the lower intake days and you burn more.

Another thing - I read that drinking your full 8 glasses of water every day burns an extra 500 calories each week.
You can also burn a few extra calories and strengthen your core by sitting upright (without leaning back against the seat) with your shoulders rolled back when at a desk, watching telly or driving. Having more muscles also increases your ability to burn fat, so perhaps switch some of the cardio exercises to weights and strength training?

You have a history of very disordered eating, which in itself probably confuses the hell out of your metabolism; and you've had a baby, which is a fantastic thing but a hell of a shock to the system. Is it any wonder that your body isn't sure what to do next?

I really think you should go back to your doctor and explain what you've told us (which, btw, was a very brave thing to do). Because it sounds like your whole relationship with food, physically, mentally and emotionally, is really difficult. And, you have a little girl now, and you want to be well for her, and to make sure her relationship with food doesn't go the same way. Go and ask your doctor to be referred not only in relation to your body's nutritional needs, but in relation to your mindset around it - so, to whatever kind of counselling or support they can offer you to help you work through it. It won't happen overnight, and it will be really hard, but you can do it. Good luck!