Feeling Really Discouraged About WLS

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Quasita
Quasita Posts: 1,530 Member
in Motivation and Support
So where to begin... I'm 6'1", currently weighing in at ~420lbs after losing 120lbs on my own. I've had a lot of fights and difficulties along the way when it comes to my weight loss... Secondary illnesses, several surgeries, battling and conquering severe depression, poverty and joblessness... But after a year or so, after recovering from my last surgery, I hadn't seen any success in weight loss, despite multiple options used.

Thus, we engaged the assistance of the bariatrics team at a local hospital, one that is supposed to be awesome and research-based; my insurance won't cover any medical assistance for weight loss unless surgery is involved. After a long, long contemplation, I finally decided to try it, after being vehemently defiant. I always thought it should be a last resort option for the severely ill or immobile... Neither of which I am.

Anyway, I started back in April. Typical projection for progression through these programs is ~6 months, mostly due to insurance criteria, but my insurance doesn't have those kind of limits. I've met every goal so far... They told me to replace meals with whey protein shake, I replaced 2 meals a day. Removed all nicotine, THC, most carbonation and caffeine, NSAIDs... Get at least 60 minutes of cardio a day, have 2 days of resistance training a week now as well, take all my supplements. Have shown up to every scheduled imaging test, psychological exam, dietitian meeting, have educated myself profusely on the subject matter...

To the best of my knowledge, everyone has basically said, it's all good. But I feel lost. They act like they aren't used to patients that take the instructions as seriously as I have... I hear the staff talking generically about repeat starters and people failing to meet their criteria. You'd think they'd be thrilled to have someone so interested in success... but it seems the opposite. I feel so completely discouraged at this point. I have never heard another bariatric patient have this experience.

Is it so bad that I just want to get it done, and move on with the rest of the lifestyle change? I know it's not bad... I know I'm anxious, and the fact that I'm looking at submitting for surgery in less than 6 months is a success in itself... But I do with I felt a bit more courageous.

Replies

  • ptipton520
    ptipton520 Posts: 83 Member
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    I don't know what to say. Is there a staff manager you can talk to and see why things are at a standstill? You've worked hard and are to be congratulated for your progress and persistence. As for the staff only talking about those that were not good patients, that's normal. We tend to remember failures and most of us, don't applaud those who are doing what they should -- just human nature. Try not to let it get your down.
  • 12Sarah2015
    12Sarah2015 Posts: 1,117 Member
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    Find friends or mfp to congratulate you. People being paid to tell you isn't quite the same, so don't worry what they say
  • SweetP27
    SweetP27 Posts: 217 Member
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    First of all - great job on meeting the goals and criteria that have been set! That is tremendous!! You may want to say to the team you are working with the same thing you said in your post. Let them know how you feel. Keep moving forward - you are doing awesome!!
  • upoffthemat
    upoffthemat Posts: 679 Member
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    Sounds to me like you are going to win with or without them. I am really impressed by your attitude!

    Be as assertive with them as you have with your program
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    Congrats on your success to date! You don't actually come out and say it, but it sounds like you want the process to move faster.. You're at month 4 of a 6 month process. So have you actually asked if you can move to the next step now that you've met all the criteria? If you have, and they said no, then realize it's only 2 months, not the rest of your life. you will havr this extra time to incorportate these changes as part of permanent life style--because many of these you will need to continue to continue losses after surgery then to maintain. You might be able to appeal to a manager or physician.

    As far as the staff not being more tuned in to where you're at, I'm sorry about this. It is a common occurrence in all areas of life. People are geared to talk and function according to the most common situations. When conducting home projects, contractors always say "We can do xxx for children or yyy for pets, even though I have neither." Ijust have to let it roll off and move one. Obviously, we hope that health care workers are more sObviousl, but that's not always the case. Take pride that you are an exception to the rule!
  • Quasita
    Quasita Posts: 1,530 Member
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    lorrpb wrote: »
    Congrats on your success to date! You don't actually come out and say it, but it sounds like you want the process to move faster.. You're at month 4 of a 6 month process. So have you actually asked if you can move to the next step now that you've met all the criteria? If you have, and they said no, then realize it's only 2 months, not the rest of your life. you will havr this extra time to incorportate these changes as part of permanent life style--because many of these you will need to continue to continue losses after surgery then to maintain. You might be able to appeal to a manager or physician.

    As far as the staff not being more tuned in to where you're at, I'm sorry about this. It is a common occurrence in all areas of life. People are geared to talk and function according to the most common situations. When conducting home projects, contractors always say "We can do xxx for children or yyy for pets, even though I have neither." Ijust have to let it roll off and move one. Obviously, we hope that health care workers are more sObviousl, but that's not always the case. Take pride that you are an exception to the rule!

    I'm not sure where you got a 6 month process idea from...? It's not necessarily a 6 month process. I don't have that timeline requirement on my WLS (I know that I'm delayed in my response, I just saw this though)... Since I posted this, we have applied for coverage, been denied, and submitted an appeal to my insurance. I posted this and then called the office and we moved forward with the surgery, the surgeon was on the same page as me, her staff was just not in the same vein at the time.
  • Hamsibian
    Hamsibian Posts: 1,388 Member
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    I am not experiencing the same thing, but being familiar with medical settings, I am not surprised with your staff's attitudes. I swear they need a specific rotation solely focused on sensitivity training...or at least not to be complete buttheads.

    Surgery is a huge deal, so it's understandable that you are feeling apprehensive about these changes. I think you're very courageous for everything that you have been doing so far. Your determination and enthusiasm to keep moving forward is wonderful, and I wish you the best of luck!
  • Johanina23
    Johanina23 Posts: 1 Member
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    Congratulations! I understand the frustration that you are going through right now since I was in your shoes 2.5 years ago. I started my journey weighing in at 259lbs and even though I loved myself I needed to change my lifestyle and lose weight. I was was fortunate to have a very supportive clinical staff, friends and family. But there were times when your friends do not understand the process. I found a forum where I was able to connect with others going through the same thing I was. It is thinnertimes.com

    Keep up the good work and don't get discouraged. Feel free to contact me to chat if and when you need.

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