Why do people think overeating is compensating?
AriesGal329
Posts: 236 Member
Many times I'll hear the opinion that people who overeat are compensating for something missing from their lives. And we're urged to find "the real problem." Maybe I just really love to eat. I love the taste of food and I don't have to "binge" or even overeat much to gain weight...it's just my personal metabolism. Why is there the idea that there's some underlying problem I'm not addressing? For some people I'm sure there is an underlying problem, but I just don't believe that is true for everyone. Pizza's good, man!!!
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Replies
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lauragreenbaum148 wrote: »Many times I'll hear the opinion that people who overeat are compensating for something missing from their lives. And we're urged to find "the real problem." Maybe I just really love to eat. I love the taste of food and I don't have to "binge" or even overeat much to gain weight...it's just my personal metabolism. Why is there the idea that there's some underlying problem I'm not addressing? For some people I'm sure there is an underlying problem, but I just don't believe that is true for everyone. Pizza's good, man!!!
Like drugs, some people find food comforting or as a way to cope.9 -
lauragreenbaum148 wrote: »Many times I'll hear the opinion that people who overeat are compensating for something missing from their lives. And we're urged to find "the real problem." Maybe I just really love to eat. I love the taste of food and I don't have to "binge" or even overeat much to gain weight...it's just my personal metabolism. Why is there the idea that there's some underlying problem I'm not addressing? For some people I'm sure there is an underlying problem, but I just don't believe that is true for everyone. Pizza's good, man!!!
Actually, from a scientific standpoint you do have to over eat to gain weight as you have to be in a calorie surplus.13 -
i don't know but i do admit that when i feel sad or depressed some food make my day less cr@ppy: cookies, macdonald's menu (don't ask me why! i carve it also when i feel nauseous lol) .
But the rest of the time, i eat pizza, cookies, sushi well because i carve the taste. Well balanced recipes that gives us pleasure once consumed are juste that, pleasure treats (or traps for those that have a hard time being sensible in their consumption).
Then is you are in a low moment in your life and eating is a way to refrain from thinking about what upsets you then you may be conpensating. If food is an escape. a pleasurable one.
IF you feel great and you eat pizza , well like you said A good, quality Pizza , genuine french fries etc. are d@mn good, we don't need to be depressed to eat them, just to have good taste buds.
But then ... eating too much of the tasty foods may make you gain weight and then be depressed if your body image does not please you. well pick up your case lol0 -
There's varying of "overeating". If I CI/CO more than 1900 calories a day I'm gonna gain. But that isn't the same for someone else.
And BTW. Your metabolism isn't unusually slow. You are just eating too much for your body.
I'm a pretty happy person but if I have a bad day the first thing I want is cake or beer. It's not like I don't love cake or beer any other time, it's just I have less control if I have a bad day. I don't care as much.3 -
I think different people eat for different reasons. Some people eat emotionally. Others don't. I've been known to stress eat on occasion, but even when not stressed out sometimes I just eat too much or make bad choices because the food tastes good. Not everything is deep or profound. Sometimes, I just want hit up 5 guys and eat a 900 calorie cheeseburger7
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Lots of people legitimately comfort eat or eat to numb feelings, some compulsive overeat to the degree that it borders self-harm, some don't know what amounts are right for them, some just have bad habits, but food is also cruicial to our existence, it tastes good and is used as glue in many social settings. You can't get away from food, and we (at least the majority of the people in here) are lucky enough to have plenty of healthy, tasty and safe food available at all times.3
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As others have said, like anything else, it can be an addiction. Once the connection is made that food can momentarily aid in feeling better, many people use it as a support. Sometimes it has consequences, like being in a surplus, and some times it does not, such as gaining no weight. But it has nothing to do with your metabolism.
With that being said, I am a very logical person. So if I find myself binging, it typically was because I just wanted to eat or I was bored. I also am someone that just enjoys food, and I'm sure you won't find many that do not enjoy eating, but I just never made the emotional connection to it. I'm quite the opposite. I don't eat if I'm upset. But I have had addictions to other unhealthy methods to cope. So it just boils down to someone's coping mechanisms and how they chose to deal with external and internal stressors.1 -
TavistockToad wrote: »lauragreenbaum148 wrote: »Many times I'll hear the opinion that people who overeat are compensating for something missing from their lives. And we're urged to find "the real problem." Maybe I just really love to eat. I love the taste of food and I don't have to "binge" or even overeat much to gain weight...it's just my personal metabolism. Why is there the idea that there's some underlying problem I'm not addressing? For some people I'm sure there is an underlying problem, but I just don't believe that is true for everyone. Pizza's good, man!!!
Actually, from a scientific standpoint you do have to over eat to gain weight as you have to be in a calorie surplus.
I think you missed the "much" in the OP.2 -
Basically it's this^. I was watching a youtube about something related this morning. The guy said he was always being asked why he never had food cravings or binged. He said he never found comfort in food, he just used it as food. But he also said, what he found comfort in was drugs (he's clean now though) and couldn't understand how some people could only have a little Vicodin (like if they were prescribed etc) because he'd binge on that like some people binge on food.
Like drugs, some people find food comforting or as a way to cope.
Personally, I binge on coffee but not much else. lol
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lauragreenbaum148 wrote: »Many times I'll hear the opinion that people who overeat are compensating for something missing from their lives. And we're urged to find "the real problem." Maybe I just really love to eat. I love the taste of food and I don't have to "binge" or even overeat much to gain weight...it's just my personal metabolism. Why is there the idea that there's some underlying problem I'm not addressing? For some people I'm sure there is an underlying problem, but I just don't believe that is true for everyone. Pizza's good, man!!!
I can totally feel the difference when I'm overeating because it tastes good and I want to versus when I used to emotional eat. Stick around and you will see that managing stress with food is very common.
I very much doubt that you have a slow metabolism - it's easy to gain weight from just regularly overeating a little more than you expend.0 -
I'm the same way OP - I love food, it's a hobby for me, and I've had to re-learn to only eat when I'm actually hungry.
But nope, you're not a special snowflakes and your metabolism is probably just fine - you're just overeating. It doesn't take much to gain even 10 pounds a year.. just 100 extra calories a day. That's one small piece of cheese or an apple.
But I agree that you don't have to be emotionally unstable to just love food.7 -
lauragreenbaum148 wrote: »Many times I'll hear the opinion that people who overeat are compensating for something missing from their lives. And we're urged to find "the real problem." Maybe I just really love to eat. I love the taste of food and I don't have to "binge" or even overeat much to gain weight...it's just my personal metabolism. Why is there the idea that there's some underlying problem I'm not addressing? For some people I'm sure there is an underlying problem, but I just don't believe that is true for everyone. Pizza's good, man!!!
Because, it usually is. Food hits the reward centers of the brain, so it's an easy way to use food as an emotional crutch.2 -
I also love food and it's not an emotional thing. My terrible habit is eating when I'm bored.3
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TavistockToad wrote: »lauragreenbaum148 wrote: »Many times I'll hear the opinion that people who overeat are compensating for something missing from their lives. And we're urged to find "the real problem." Maybe I just really love to eat. I love the taste of food and I don't have to "binge" or even overeat much to gain weight...it's just my personal metabolism. Why is there the idea that there's some underlying problem I'm not addressing? For some people I'm sure there is an underlying problem, but I just don't believe that is true for everyone. Pizza's good, man!!!
Actually, from a scientific standpoint you do have to over eat to gain weight as you have to be in a calorie surplus.
I think you missed the "much" in the OP.
I think the point - and I could very well be incorrect - is that "much" is irrelevant. So, of course, if you overeat at all, you gain weight.3 -
I am not an emotional eater or a binge eater. A lot of people with lifelong weight issues do have emotional issues to address but definitely not every overweight person.
I gained weight because I ate too many calories for my activity level. It was easy to do... eating the equivalant of one extra cheeseburger a day over time. Lost weight when I ate the right number. I don't have to work on anything other than that.2 -
I was one of those people who was guilty of 'comfort eating'. I had a very stressful job that I wasn't happy in so would 'relax' on my day off by catching up on my to that I didn't get to watch all week with tons of junk food!! but it wasn't the sole reason for my weight gain. These were some others:
1) I worked in catering-around food all day and my staff would suck up by bringing me larger portions of food and endless latte's!
2) I was used to always having an active job and being able to eat what I want because running around a restaurant for 14 hours a day will definitely work it off! But when I moved into a field based role, it didn't make me eat less but sitting in meetings or in my car all day meant I was no longer working it off.
3) my lifestyle changed with this new role...not eating all day because I spent it jumping from town to town, it was easier to go to the drive through or order a takeaway when I got home late. I would prefer to get an extra half hour in bed than eat breakfast so would grab some junk from the services on my way to work instead.
So yes I agree that that it isn't always emotional eating. Everyone is different...my sister always loses weight when she's stressed or unhappy because she doesn't feel like eating and I think my brother in law is overweight because he isn't educated enough in healthy living.1 -
So you stopped overeating, are in complete control, and are losing weight then? Very good.1
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I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.3
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mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
I'm curious to know why you think this.1 -
mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
I'm curious to know why you think this.
Are you also curious about why people might think alcoholics and drug addicts have emotional issues? These are all evidence of self-destructive behavior, and often used as coping mechanisms. It's why many of us see fat acceptance as a movement encouraging denial.2 -
mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
Like @LokiGrrl I am curious about this statement...it sounds as if it may be coming from personal experience? What is your story @mygrl4meee if you care to share?0 -
sunnybeaches105 wrote: »mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
I'm curious to know why you think this.
Are you also curious about why people might think alcoholics and drug addicts have emotional issues? These are all evidence of self-destructive behavior, and often used as coping mechanisms. It's why many of us see fat acceptance as a movement encouraging denial.
I said I was curious why the poster believes that someone who has at least 100 pounds to lose must have "emotionally... something going on," because I want to know why she thinks this, and that is the sole reason for my post. There is no ulterior motive and I'd appreciate it if you didn't infer one.2 -
sunnybeaches105 wrote: »mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
I'm curious to know why you think this.
Are you also curious about why people might think alcoholics and drug addicts have emotional issues? These are all evidence of self-destructive behavior, and often used as coping mechanisms. It's why many of us see fat acceptance as a movement encouraging denial.
I said I was curious why the poster believes that someone who has at least 100 pounds to lose must have "emotionally... something going on," because I want to know why she thinks this, and that is the sole reason for my post. There is no ulterior motive and I'd appreciate it if you didn't infer one.
She's not the only one that thinks this, and I'd appreciate it if you discussed the point rationally rather than getting defensive.0 -
sunnybeaches105 wrote: »sunnybeaches105 wrote: »mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
I'm curious to know why you think this.
Are you also curious about why people might think alcoholics and drug addicts have emotional issues? These are all evidence of self-destructive behavior, and often used as coping mechanisms. It's why many of us see fat acceptance as a movement encouraging denial.
I said I was curious why the poster believes that someone who has at least 100 pounds to lose must have "emotionally... something going on," because I want to know why she thinks this, and that is the sole reason for my post. There is no ulterior motive and I'd appreciate it if you didn't infer one.
She's not the only one that thinks this, and I'd appreciate it if you discussed the point rationally rather than getting defensive.
That's fine if she's not the only one who thinks this. If you think I'm defensive, well, okay. I still just want to know why she thinks that, and it doesn't have anything to do with drugs or alcohol or fat acceptance or any of that. If you'd like to engage on that particular question I'll be glad to talk with you rationally, but I can't really start the discussion because I don't have the faintest idea what the premise of that argument is. So, you know, I asked, which is a thing I do when I don't know something.4 -
sunnybeaches105 wrote: »sunnybeaches105 wrote: »mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
I'm curious to know why you think this.
Are you also curious about why people might think alcoholics and drug addicts have emotional issues? These are all evidence of self-destructive behavior, and often used as coping mechanisms. It's why many of us see fat acceptance as a movement encouraging denial.
I said I was curious why the poster believes that someone who has at least 100 pounds to lose must have "emotionally... something going on," because I want to know why she thinks this, and that is the sole reason for my post. There is no ulterior motive and I'd appreciate it if you didn't infer one.
She's not the only one that thinks this, and I'd appreciate it if you discussed the point rationally rather than getting defensive.
That's fine if she's not the only one who thinks this. If you think I'm defensive, well, okay. I still just want to know why she thinks that, and it doesn't have anything to do with drugs or alcohol or fat acceptance or any of that. If you'd like to engage on that particular question I'll be glad to talk with you rationally, but I can't really start the discussion because I don't have the faintest idea what the premise of that argument is. So, you know, I asked, which is a thing I do when I don't know something.
Okay then . . .
To be honest, I'm not following your response, but I'll try to respond. I find that many people get very defensive when discussing mental health, but it's not something that should be stigmatized (though it is) or be embarrassed by (though many people are). The point regarding serious obesity and emotional issues is significant though in the sense that help may need to include counseling. You don't have spend much time on MFP to see that many seriously overweight people are dealing with emotional issues, and telling that group that what they need to do is simply calorie count and use self control isn't really all that effective.3 -
KetoneKaren wrote: »mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
Like @LokiGrrl I am curious about this statement...it sounds as if it may be coming from personal experience? What is your story @mygrl4meee if you care to share?
Sure. I had two big things that caused me to use food to feel better.. One was losing a baby to adoption when family wouldn't help.. Two was my first husband wanting to openly sleep around with thin woman. It wasn't until I was in reunion with my daughter and sleeked counseling for the loss and my split with husband could I lose weight. I am well.. Not perfect. I put on 15 pounds dealing with a second divorce. I am trying to get it back off.0 -
sunnybeaches105 wrote: »So you stopped overeating, are in complete control, and are losing weight then? Very good.
I didn't say that. I said I sometimes overeat because I really enjoy food. Not because I didn't get hugged enough.4 -
I'm sorry those things happened to you. Glad to hear you're better.0
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mygrl4meee wrote: »KetoneKaren wrote: »mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
Like @LokiGrrl I am curious about this statement...it sounds as if it may be coming from personal experience? What is your story @mygrl4meee if you care to share?
Sure. I had two big things that caused me to use food to feel better.. One was losing a baby to adoption when family wouldn't help.. Two was my first husband wanting to openly sleep around with thin woman. It wasn't until I was in reunion with my daughter and sleeked counseling for the loss and my split with husband could I lose weight. I am well.. Not perfect. I put on 15 pounds dealing with a second divorce. I am trying to get it back off.
Oh my gosh...so sorry that you went through such difficulties.
Did you gain a hundred lbs? Is that why you were using that figure? I am 25lbs down on a 100lb journey. 0 -
KetoneKaren wrote: »mygrl4meee wrote: »KetoneKaren wrote: »mygrl4meee wrote: »I personally believe for someone to be 100 or more pounds overweight that emotionally there is something going on. Big differences between being 30 pounds overweight compared to someone who needs to lose 100 and up pounds.
Like @LokiGrrl I am curious about this statement...it sounds as if it may be coming from personal experience? What is your story @mygrl4meee if you care to share?
Sure. I had two big things that caused me to use food to feel better.. One was losing a baby to adoption when family wouldn't help.. Two was my first husband wanting to openly sleep around with thin woman. It wasn't until I was in reunion with my daughter and sleeked counseling for the loss and my split with husband could I lose weight. I am well.. Not perfect. I put on 15 pounds dealing with a second divorce. I am trying to get it back off.
Oh my gosh...so sorry that you went through such difficulties. Did you gain a hundred lbs? Is that why you were using that figure? I am 25lbs down on a 100lb journey.
Yes. I was 100 pounds over the top range for a healthy weight. I was 5'10 and 272 pounds. I am now 185 trying to get back to my 1700
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