Unsupportive wife

Did she give you any examples or further explanation about what she thinks is too restrictive about your diet? Change is difficult for a lot of people. It would be very difficult to deal with an unsupportive spouse, but I think you may be on to something that sometimes the people who love us are threatened by us changing.

I can't see your diary, so can't comment on your wife's statement, but perhaps it's time you reevaluate what you're doing. I'm not saying she's right, but she is your wife. Either she loves you and is legitimately worried about what you're doing to yourself or, your initial assumption is correct and she's just saying she's worried about you when it's really another emotion that's causing her behavior. It's difficult to know the answer without the facts. It's something you may need to decide for yourself.

My mother was like this with my father. Even though they had been married for 25 years, she was afraid that if he lost all that weight, she would no longer be good enough for him. It sounds petty but it was a real concern to her. Make sure your wife knows you are 100 committed to her and your family, and that weight will never change any of that..

If we could see your diary that would help a lot. She is either actually truly worried about you, or she is jealous of your weight loss and success because A) she hasnt had success or she doesnt want to and is mad that you are. What kind of diet are you on? How much do you exercise? Maybe you can have her join you for exercise or have her try to get involved with your diet and make it a "family thing".

yeah my wife doesn't like when I diet because I don't eat her cooking when i do. the calorie counting thing is easier but I like Atkins or the lemonade cleanse but she hates it

and she seldom acknowledges my weight loss, I get more support from strangers

sounds like your wife is in denial mode, she doesn't want to make those changes, so hates it that anyone else can have the strength to do so.

it's very sad that she won't support you. luckily you have a tonne of people on here who will support your new healthy lifestyle.

what does she say when you say that you want to be healthy for a long and happy life! That you'd rather not drop dead of a heart attack or get diet related diabetes or something equally as unpleasant?

Sounds like she needs a good old dose of the cold hard truth... It hurts, but sometimes it's necessary. my partner had to give me the cold hard and unpleasant truth many times before i decided that i didn't want to be a fat sloth anymore enough to make the change. But at least she could be encouraging and envious, and in awe of your hot new bod...

It might be that she is trying to find an excuse for not eating healthier like you are. She likes the old bad stuff, and it's just hard for her to change, and she doesn't want to be forced into doing it??? Just a thought.

she thinks your gonna get looking good and leave her

It does seem like you're just eating less of normal food (which isn't necessarily a horrible thing), but I wouldn't say you're deprived. Especially since you have an entire area on your tracker for beer. lol

Your diary looks great, you don't seem to be depriving yourself and 2000 calories is great. a 2-3 lb wt loss a week for your size is perfect too. Just keep doin what your doin. I'm sure she'll come around

my heart goes out to you brother, I know how you feel my wife told me the same thing not to long ago and to top it my wife said " you are starting to act very arrogant " and then just a few day latter my mom said the exact same thing, that's a double blow.

I told my wife the reason why I wanted to change my life, Its because Nov 30 me and my middle daughter went to the doctor and I seen her weight 198, then I seen the look on her face, I almost wanted to cry right there, then I weighed in at 302 and right then and there I knew I needed to change the way I looked so my kids would want to do the same.

we are doing the right thing my friend and we also know the reasons why were doing it, keep your head up brother.

I agree with some others that it appears that you are just eating less than "normal", which is a good place to start.

My wife likes to make little comments as well. She doesn't care for my "protein" diet, or that I'm eating a lot more fiber (I can see that one due to the "effects", but I'm not stopping). Truthfully my wife doesn't even know everything that I do because I know she wouldn't like it. My wife also knows and exploits little ways to get me to eat more, such as "sharing" a snack, getting me to take her out to eat, threatening to throw something away (I don't waste food), etc. I will say that my wife is back on the weight loss band wagon, but who knows whether she'll stick with it this time.

I love that you're fitting beer into your daily calories and while still losing weight! Congrats on what you've lost so far. While you've got the cutting calories part down, you're still eating a lot of fast foods and processed meals. When it comes to the point that you need to eat less calories to continue to lose weight (and I promise you, that point will come!) that will be the easiest area to cut some extra fat and calories out. At that point, if not sooner, you'll want to start adding in fruits and vegetables to replace those higher calorie foods. That's the only thing that's really lacking from your diet right now.

Having looked at your diary, your wife doesn't have a legitimate concern for your weight loss. You are eating probably the same things you were before but less of them. I have a feeling that your wife is probably feeling insecure and perhaps a bit jealous. There's nothing like a loved one losing weight when we know we really need to make us jealous, insecure and guilty.

It may be time to sit down with her and have a really serious talk. First, remind her that you are currently eating the recommended 2000 calories a day for an adult. You are not under-eating and she shouldn't be worried about that aspect of your eating habits. Then let her know that your weight loss is not going to make you love her less. If she chooses not to lose weight with you, that's her decision. If and when she's ever ready to make that leap, let her know that you'll support her all the way. In the meantime, don't push what you are doing on her and don't flaunt it. I'm sure you aren't, but it would only make the situation worse. Keep doing what you're doing and more than likely she'll eventually decide it's time for her to do the same.

Good luck to you!

i would say she is feeling down on herself because you have the willpower and perhaps she does not.
or if she is the one cooking she could be upset that she has to cook all different meals for everyone because of food restrictions, kids likes/dislkes etc.