Help me not hate being in the gym!

Options
DanerTee
DanerTee Posts: 263 Member
in Fitness and Exercise
To be clear- I don't dislike working out. I always feel amazing after a good workout and I love having an active lifestyle.

I'm struggling with being the fat chick in the weights section.

I am so intimidated by it, that I can only make myself set foot there with my trainer. Now, my trainer is a good friend and awesome in every way and makes me feel like I belong in the weights section, but at 240 lbs, I am almost ALWAYS the fattest one there.

I get looks from the bulky dudes and the fit ladies and I wish I could know what they are thinking. Are they thinking "What the hell is she doing here?!" or something nicer?

I KNOW I shouldn't care. I know I should just walk in there like I own the place.....but UGH. I can't seem to do it.

My trainer gives me programs that I am to do on my own and I am just dreading it every. single. time.

All the mirrors which make it impossible to avoid the sight of myself lifting weights doesn't help much with the old self esteem either. It ain't pretty.

I just can't seem to muster up any confidence at the gym. Any pointers from you fine people?
«1

Replies

  • PandoraGreen721
    PandoraGreen721 Posts: 450 Member
    Options
    Just try to keep in perspective everyone has a "starting point" and this is yours. Look at the mirrors not as a negative, but as a positive. When you see yourself not only can you correct your form on the spot..but you can give yourself a smile knowing that you're working towards a better you!

    Focus on why you're there, and do your best to avoid wondering what others are thinking. You are there to better yourself, as are they.

    Also, great job for taking this step and moving forward in your journey no matter how scary it may seem right now! Go in there knowing each workout you do...is a step forward towards your goal(s).
  • goldthistime
    goldthistime Posts: 3,214 Member
    Options
    New workout clothes have helped me get in there. But just going and going and going is really the best answer. It's going to feel normal in no time.
  • sadinplaid
    sadinplaid Posts: 140 Member
    edited September 2016
    Options
    I've definitely had my time of being the fattest chick in the weights section, and I definitely had those days of feeling like, "I just can't do this today." It's can sometimes feel like a meat market or a prison yard in the weights section. :smile: I started this journey of getting in shape with a personal trainer, and that definitely boosted my confidence to go in the weights section by myself because I knew what I was doing even if I didn't look the part. I can say now that I'm in better shape, when I see women in the weights section who are overweight/obese, I'm thinking, "Get it, girl!"
  • rainbowbow
    rainbowbow Posts: 7,490 Member
    edited September 2016
    Options
    DanerTee wrote: »
    I get looks from the bulky dudes and the fit ladies and I wish I could know what they are thinking. Are they thinking "What the hell is she doing here?!" or something nicer?

    Who knows? They could be thinking nice stuff like "respect to her!" or mean stuff like "eww, could you not" there's no way we can possible know. Some people are nice, some people are dicks, I for one, am glad i can't read anyone's mind.


    In my opinion, you've got to let this stuff go. You are projecting your own insecurities and unhappiness onto other random people in the gym. We can't possible know if others are judging you, and even if they are, so what?


    I would look at it this way. "I am a person. I am going to workout at the gym. I pay my membership just like everyone else. My trainer is counting on me to complete this workout. I am counting on me to complete this workout. I am taking the necessary steps every day to change my situation. Even though I am currently unhappy with my body/looks/have low self esteem, doesn't mean i'm not worthy. My future happiness matters more to me than anyone else's opinions AND my current self esteem." etc. etc. etc.


    It's hard when you're a major self-hater. You've got to decide you're worth it and that you'll do whatever it takes until you finally believe it.
  • chapiano
    chapiano Posts: 331 Member
    Options
    I hate gyms! For the cost of a few months membership you can buy yourself a half decent home set up
  • rainbowbow
    rainbowbow Posts: 7,490 Member
    edited September 2016
    Options
    chapiano wrote: »
    I hate gyms! For the cost of a few months membership you can buy yourself a half decent home set up

    not everyone has a house or a location to set up a gym though.

    As someone who lives in a capital city where all the buildings are hundreds of years old and renovated into "flats", my downstairs neighbor wouldn't like me very much if i set up a home gym. Oh, and as i have limited space, i don't think my furniture/tv would like me throwing weights around either. LOL


    I get the sentiment, but it simply isn't practical for everyone. We're not all in suburbia with a spacious garage we can safely set a gym up in or a house with tons of space where we won't damage the property.
  • kbmnurse
    kbmnurse Posts: 2,484 Member
    Options
    I HATE the GYM. So I don't go. I do many other physical activities run, walk and DVD's. You Tube has a slew of free work out video's.
  • sammyliftsandeats
    sammyliftsandeats Posts: 2,421 Member
    Options
    I was scared at first but I just kept going and going until I got familiar with the regular people and the set up. Now I go and we smile at each other, say hello, and sometimes even banter a bit.

    They notice that you're putting the work in and they respect that. They aren't there to judge you by what you look like, what you're wearing (unless it's to compliment your cool tshirt), and they certainly don't care how much (or little) you are lifting.

    It's like with anything...the more you do it, the more comfortable you become with it.
  • StealthHealth
    StealthHealth Posts: 2,417 Member
    Options
    rainbowbow wrote: »
    chapiano wrote: »
    I hate gyms! For the cost of a few months membership you can buy yourself a half decent home set up

    not everyone has a house or a location to set up a gym though.

    As someone who lives in a capital city where all the buildings are hundreds of years old and renovated into "flats", my downstairs neighbor wouldn't like me very much if i set up a home gym.

    + my Gym membership is paid by my company. A home set up wouldn't be.

    FWIW my gym is £20 per month so if I were paying myself and saved it to buy home equipment I could get (maybe) an empty second hand Olympic bar?

    When I did have a home set up I bought it all second hand - Powercage, bench, bar and plates. It was £600 so equivalent to 30 months gym membership. I liked having that kit around but the space it took up was an issue and when I got the free gym membership, it was time to sell it and use the gym. I've met some pretty awesome people at my current gym and learnt much, much more than i would have done working out at home.
  • antennachick
    antennachick Posts: 464 Member
    Options
    Why I love my crossfit gym...no mirrors lol
  • DanerTee
    DanerTee Posts: 263 Member
    Options
    Thanks all, for the encouragement! I really have to just own where I am, and know that the hard work and discomfort I feel will be temporary. I don't know why I care so much about what other people think of me, but it's been a monkey on my back for a long time.
  • Michael190lbs
    Michael190lbs Posts: 1,510 Member
    Options
    I admire people in the gym who are there to workout its the make up wearing perfume stink smelling yak ity yak people I can't stand. Don't get me wrong dudes can be just as bad BSing about nothing sitting on a machine doing nothing they just don't stink..lol..

    Do it for you screw what other people think- Just do it
  • rainbowbow
    rainbowbow Posts: 7,490 Member
    Options
    Michael190lbs wrote: »
    I admire people in the gym who are there to workout its the make up wearing perfume stink smelling yak ity yak people I can't stand. Don't get me wrong dudes can be just as bad BSing about nothing sitting on a machine doing nothing they just don't stink..lol..

    Do it for you screw what other people think- Just do it

    I've experienced the opposite. I dont care if women wear makeup... but the amount of dudes who don't wear deodorant... my god...
  • sadinplaid
    sadinplaid Posts: 140 Member
    Options
    @divcara So inspiring and true!

Categories