are your partners being supportive ?

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  • JoLeeFA
    JoLeeFA Posts: 211 Member
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    Let us not forget that some men think differently than we girls do.

    My husband is not as supportive as I would like him to be. He says all the right things when we talk about me dieting. BUT, he never tells me that I look good. Never encourages me to exercise. Never offers to go on a walk with me. Never offers to take the kids off my hands so I can go to the gym.

    I don't have the answers to how to fix this, but consider this; (these are the things I currently ponder as well)
    1. Some guys just like bigger women. I almost dropped dead last year when a man at the gym told me that he was thinking that he would have to leave his wife. He said he just wasn't as physically attracted to her since she had lost 100 pounds. Even though he, himself had lost about 100 pounds.
    2. Maybe he has some insecurities about himself and he projects them onto you. I have known men who believe that if you are not confident about your body, you won't attract other men. They think that shedding pounds is about attracting other men, when your goal is to be healthy.

    just thinking.
    Good luck,
    Jo
  • maxinethestrange
    maxinethestrange Posts: 146
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    Yeah, my husband is, but his "ideal woman" is fit and muscular. I could see a problem if he really like curvy women.

    Next time boyfriend is in a good talkative mood sit him down (7 years of marriage has taught me to wait for the right moods) and talk about it. Tell him you love him and that isn't going to change as you get healthier. Tell him the sex will get better (it will!). But that you really need his support. You aren't doing this in order to lose your boobs (really, not many woman have that goal) but to get healthier, to feel better about yourself. It's a lifetime thing, not a temporary thing and his support would mean a lot to you. Let him know he doesn't have to eat like you, just ask him to not make negative comments and/or offer you bad foods. What you need from him isn't really that much.

    lol sex does get better this may be TMI but i was like cool i bend this way and my stomach isnt getting in the road wooo im awesome :L

    hes been in a bit of a rubbish mood as hes full of the flu and just genral money issues but i will talk to him and hopefully he wont say its okay to eat a tub of ice cream :L He did mention that he was worried i would leave him if i got all slim and good looking silly guy doesnt realize i love him just not myself.
    thanks for all the good advice :)
  • joehempel
    joehempel Posts: 1,761 Member
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    It took a bit for my wife to come around, but she's really being supportive, and I'm trying to do the same, telling her that I love her and stuff like that....because it's true, I'm not doing this to find a "fit" woman, it's more for my health and to be more energetic, less moody, and be around longer.

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