Strange comments from others after weight loss!?
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Two people have told me that if I lose any more weight at all, I'm going to look gaunt and old.1
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I have had many comments about my drivers license picture and was told it would be best to get a new picture, especially with voting. I also had someone ask if my poop volume decressed with weight loss. WtH type of question is that?10
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I recently had the clerk at the corner store ask me why I wasn't in school. Uhhhh gee Brenda maybe because I graduated freaking college in 2011 loooool4
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I've been told I look anorexic and asked if I've been "throwing up". I just chalk it up to people's jealousy and ignorance.0
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This isn't weight loss exactly... But I recently decided to do a bulk (One of several bulk and cut cycles I will be doing before next year) I've been entered into my gym's bodybuilding competition for the fitness category.
I mentioned this to my family, because you know, excitement. And family should be supportive. But then they went on to say that I will look like a man and whatnot, and me having short hair would make women want to date me or something like that. Lol. When in reality, I'm really just going for the look on my profile pic. Blah.
but they're old people and they don't quite know how it works. 4 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »
No one should feel uncomfortable at work period. If they felt uncomfortable they have a right to complain. This is why work conversations should stay work related. *shrug*playmadcats wrote: »
Nothing at all but I work in engineering. We have a couple of delicate girls that run off complaining about the most trivial of things. Eg one was bragging about her forthcoming holiday and how she was buying new swimwear at weekend. Guy piped up bet you look awesome in a bikini. Then she complains about it. She was one bought up the swimwear topic.Chef_Barbell wrote: »What is wrong with complaining about inappropriate sexual comments at work? :huh:
Guy who made boobserved comment is usually quiet type which was probably why it was so unexpected.
Edit to fix quotes.
Disagree with last part, that's sounds boring. People should just behave appropriately at work and all will be fine7 -
One person called me lollipop head. That's just silly so I laughed5
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Shadowmf023 wrote: »This isn't weight loss exactly... But I recently decided to do a bulk (One of several bulk and cut cycles I will be doing before next year) I've been entered into my gym's bodybuilding competition for the fitness category.
I mentioned this to my family, because you know, excitement. And family should be supportive. But then they went on to say that I will look like a man and whatnot, and me having short hair would make women want to date me or something like that. Lol. When in reality, I'm really just going for the look on my profile pic. Blah. but they're old people and they don't quite know how it works.
Some people think women should be soft and squishy. I like that many of the women on MFP are strong and sleek. I want to look like a stealthy lioness.6 -
I've had mostly positive comments. My pastor and his wife both told me on separate occasions how proud they were of me. I thought that was kind of odd. My husband has told me that and I didn't think it odd, but it seemed odd for someone else to say. I have had a few people tell me I don't need to lose any more weight as I'm getting too skinny. And I had a neighbor tell me not to lose any more weight because I looked better with my weight on. Some people just look better heavier. That actually hurt my feelings quite a bit. For the most part I don't mind when people tell me I look good, but if you can't say something nice then I would rather not hear it.
The ones who are saying not to lose any more are likely saying that as a compliment because you are at an ideal weight range. It is a backwards compliment though, I agree.1 -
Shadowmf023 wrote: »This isn't weight loss exactly... But I recently decided to do a bulk (One of several bulk and cut cycles I will be doing before next year) I've been entered into my gym's bodybuilding competition for the fitness category.
I mentioned this to my family, because you know, excitement. And family should be supportive. But then they went on to say that I will look like a man and whatnot, and me having short hair would make women want to date me or something like that. Lol. When in reality, I'm really just going for the look on my profile pic. Blah. but they're old people and they don't quite know how it works.
Some people think women should be soft and squishy. I like that many of the women on MFP are strong and sleek. I want to look like a stealthy lioness.
Exactly! I don't want to be skinny and fragile. I've had to put up with so much *kitten* in my life, I want to look like the warrior I am!4 -
A few people who see my before pictures swears that those pictures aren't me. Every time we do progress pictures my SO swears I am getting taller. It's not that I have more confidence so I am standing more straighter. I have had another family member tell people I was on drugs. She has never been around to see me weigh and log everything I eat. It's the same one that said I would gain it all back.playmadcats wrote: »Got a guy at work state my boobs looked more like oranges than melons. Was so gobsmake he could come out with such a statement ( luckily knew him well enough not to go running up to human resources moaning about it as some of the girls here would). Still not sure if it was a compliment of my before or after figure though.
I understand what you mean here. I really think real sexual harassment should be reported. Those things that makes a woman feel unsafe and demean her as a woman. A friend of mine and my SO at his old job almost lost his job because of a lady complained on him. The place they worked at all of them has know each other 10-15 years some more. Any way they were all out smoking and he had complimented this friend on her new outfit which had leggings. He said something in the lines I wonder if I had legs to pull those leggings off like you. They all had a good laugh over it and went about their day. A week later he was pulled in to HR because a new lady there had complained saying it made her uncomfortable. A man almost lost his job and our friend was so mad and told HR that she never felt threatened or uncomfortable. If she had she would have complained herself.5 -
Shadowmf023 wrote: »Shadowmf023 wrote: »This isn't weight loss exactly... But I recently decided to do a bulk (One of several bulk and cut cycles I will be doing before next year) I've been entered into my gym's bodybuilding competition for the fitness category.
I mentioned this to my family, because you know, excitement. And family should be supportive. But then they went on to say that I will look like a man and whatnot, and me having short hair would make women want to date me or something like that. Lol. When in reality, I'm really just going for the look on my profile pic. Blah. but they're old people and they don't quite know how it works.
Some people think women should be soft and squishy. I like that many of the women on MFP are strong and sleek. I want to look like a stealthy lioness.
Exactly! I don't want to be skinny and fragile. I've had to put up with so much *kitten* in my life, I want to look like the warrior I am!
Yaay for Warrior Princess!2 -
To be honest, since my weightloss, my colleagues have all started 'flirting' with me. I actually work in an office of 8 guys and 2 of them are more senior than me and they have all started commenting on my appearance, my body and they treat me abit more like meat now.
I give as good as I get and slap them down but holy *kitten*, it gets on my nerves. I'm no different at 140lbs as I was at 232lbs. I'm still the same person! I have worked there 4 years and they never wanted me to go out to see customers.... until I lost weight.
That says alot about the way bigger people are treated because my personality has not changed one bit.
Ah it felt good to get that out haha14 -
People in my family try really hard not to gain too much, so they are more likely to say something when I gain rather than when I lose weight.
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I'm looking forward to being where you all are now and getting compliments about my weight loss
And I think I will easily brush off even the not-so-PC comments too.
I'm very open about discussing my own weight, so I guess I've invited people to have their say whether I like what they are saying or not. In fact I have got into a really bad habit of putting myself down and inadvertently drawing more attention to my weight, just because I think I have to get in before anyone else says anything. Reality is they are probably not even thinking about it.
I'm also pretty open with my own compliments and have been making encouraging remarks every time I see my future father in law on his weight loss journey. However, last time I saw him I did think he looked really gaunt and old and actually had gone too far and was now unhealthily skinny. I only met him two years ago and he was tall and strong with broad shoulders like his sons - now he looks really small and wasted away. I didn't say anything, as I didn't want to be rude or negative and he may also have other health things going on that I don't know about.
And then again, whose going to listen to an obese person telling them they are too skinny anyway?!
My Step-Mother has also lost too much weight - everybody is worried about how she is skin and bones now and she is constantly complaining about people mentioning it, but then she brings the subject up herself all the time - putting it out there for discussion, but only listening to what she wants to hear. People are only worried for her health and well-being though - they are certainly not jealous or trying to be mean in any way.
So, I wouldn't mind my friends telling me I was going too far either way.
You know how fat creeps up on you and you don't notice until you see a bad photo, or you catch a reflection of yourself in a shop window or mirror walking next to other people who you thought were the same size - and then you realise too late that you have ballooned? Sure I knew I had put on weight as the size tags on new clothes got into higher digits each time I went shopping and I would pick up a pair of jeans I hadn't worn for a long time and think they must be someone else's, because they looked so small held up against my legs - but for a long time there I still felt I was okay and blind to just how big I was actually getting.
So it is very likely many people go the other way and lose too much, but still feel they are that fat person they once were and don't see the true image of what they are really looking like now.
One sign of losing too much weight seems to be the face looking older - some people simply look better with a bit of 'plumpness' in their face and I guess thats one positive thing about being overweight as I often get compliments about my smooth, unwrinkled skin and looking younger than others my age.
Of course I respond with; "well I guess there's a bright side to being fat"
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At my lowest weight, still well within a healthy BMI, I was told I was too skinny. I was told I looked anorexic. I was even nick-named Ana by my MIL. I've noticed a pattern with these comments. The one's that say these things tend to be people who are overweight or obese, who think overweight is "normal". I've received nothing but praise and support from people who actually are a normal weight.4
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Shadowmf023 wrote: »This isn't weight loss exactly... But I recently decided to do a bulk (One of several bulk and cut cycles I will be doing before next year) I've been entered into my gym's bodybuilding competition for the fitness category.
I mentioned this to my family, because you know, excitement. And family should be supportive. But then they went on to say that I will look like a man and whatnot, and me having short hair would make women want to date me or something like that. Lol. When in reality, I'm really just going for the look on my profile pic. Blah. but they're old people and they don't quite know how it works.
Haha! I got a similar reaction when I told my family about wanting to run a bulk. I was told to be careful not to get too bulky.1 -
ChristinaOne21 wrote: »I'm looking forward to being where you all are now and getting compliments about my weight loss
And I think I will easily brush off even the not-so-PC comments too.
I'm very open about discussing my own weight, so I guess I've invited people to have their say whether I like what they are saying or not. In fact I have got into a really bad habit of putting myself down and inadvertently drawing more attention to my weight, just because I think I have to get in before anyone else says anything. Reality is they are probably not even thinking about it.
I'm also pretty open with my own compliments and have been making encouraging remarks every time I see my future father in law on his weight loss journey. However, last time I saw him I did think he looked really gaunt and old and actually had gone too far and was now unhealthily skinny. I only met him two years ago and he was tall and strong with broad shoulders like his sons - now he looks really small and wasted away. I didn't say anything, as I didn't want to be rude or negative and he may also have other health things going on that I don't know about.
And then again, whose going to listen to an obese person telling them they are too skinny anyway?!
My Step-Mother has also lost too much weight - everybody is worried about how she is skin and bones now and she is constantly complaining about people mentioning it, but then she brings the subject up herself all the time - putting it out there for discussion, but only listening to what she wants to hear. People are only worried for her health and well-being though - they are certainly not jealous or trying to be mean in any way.
So, I wouldn't mind my friends telling me I was going too far either way.
You know how fat creeps up on you and you don't notice until you see a bad photo, or you catch a reflection of yourself in a shop window or mirror walking next to other people who you thought were the same size - and then you realise too late that you have ballooned? Sure I knew I had put on weight as the size tags on new clothes got into higher digits each time I went shopping and I would pick up a pair of jeans I hadn't worn for a long time and think they must be someone else's, because they looked so small held up against my legs - but for a long time there I still felt I was okay and blind to just how big I was actually getting.
So it is very likely many people go the other way and lose too much, but still feel they are that fat person they once were and don't see the true image of what they are really looking like now.
One sign of losing too much weight seems to be the face looking older - some people simply look better with a bit of 'plumpness' in their face and I guess thats one positive thing about being overweight as I often get compliments about my smooth, unwrinkled skin and looking younger than others my age.
Of course I respond with; "well I guess there's a bright side to being fat"
It sounds like you think too much about what other people look like, honestly. I find it strange that you were complimenting your future father-in-law so much and so frequently and only later thought about potential health issues. Did he ever bring the topic up himself or express he was trying to lose weight?
Keep in mind though that in the U.S. and many other nations, overweight has become average. Our perception of what a healthy weight looks like has been altered dramatically. Do you know for a fact the people you mentioned are underweight, or do they just look "too thin" to you? One of the things I'm worried about when I start nearing my goal weight are comments like that. My ultimate goal is 120 lbs, at 5'4.5" inches. That's perfectly healthy. Last time I lost weight (in high school) I was 150 lbs and people were telling me I was way too thin when I was actually overweight. It sabotaged me because I took it to heart and looking back at photos from that time, I can tell you I was definitely not too thin.
I think it's a combination of people not being able to recognize a healthy weight anymore, and people not being used to seeing someone at a lower weight and thus it makes them uncomfortable. Also, I find when people are still wearing their old clothes that are kind of baggy, it makes them look more "sickly" or "gaunt" than they are.
I hope you ease up on your poor step-mother, unless you know for a fact her BMI is less than 18.5.
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Mmm...two oddest for me:
Man I knew fairly well did not recognize me. Knew him for a few years (was friends with his now ex-wife) and saw him for a couple of hours 2 nights running (visiting wife/party and a play date for our daughters). He messaged me on FB the next day with "oh, so sorry, just realized who you were." Never replied. It was a nice enough message, just weird.
My mom doesn't like to hug me so much now. Expressed disappointment repeatedly my last visit on missing her "huggy bear" and how it is like hugging air. She is happy for me as far as my health, but was genuinely sad that I'm not so nice to hug anymore. Sorry mom...1
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