I'm back! Starving, grumpy and breastfeeding :-P

Well I know MFP works because I lost 90lbs in 18 months for my wedding. Now I'm back to do it all over again...

I gained 60lbs of that back shortly after when I became pregnant. 30lbs of that were gone within 2 weeks of giving birth (LOTS of water retention!) The remaining 30lbs are still stuck on me and my daughter is turning 1 in a few weeks!

I heard lots of "be gentle with yourself", "it took 9 months to put on, it'll take time to come off", and "don't cut calories too much or it'll affect your supply" so I haven't taken an aggressive approach to losing this weight....so it hasn't budged!

I should've lost this weight by now, so I'm committing to what works...counting calories. But damn! I've had 1900 calories today and feel deprived, hungry and grumpy! Granted it's only day 2 for me but I feel awful!

Any breastfeeding mommies care to weigh in? Encouragement, advice, tough love? Haha! I feel so alone in my struggles right now.

Replies

  • tlflag1620
    tlflag1620 Posts: 1,358 Member
    You're not alone! Congratulations, first of all. I have four kids (9, 6, 4, and 1) and have gained, and had to lose, 50 lbs each time (ugh). 1900 sounds like a good starting point, depending on your stats, but remember to give yourself some extra calories for breastfeeding (since your baby is almost a year old, I would only allow an extra 200-300 per day, not the 500 that exclusively breastfed babies afford you - I found by age one my youngest was only nursing a few times per day so I stopped giving myself extra calories for breastfeeding altogether; I figure whatever it does use gives me a nice little margin of error).

    For me, focusing on satiating foods was the key to not having to go hungry (for me that means high fat, low carb, but satiety is subjective so you have to find the macro split that works for you). Look at your protein, fat, and fiber goals as minimums and fill in the rest with carbs. Also make notes in your diary when you have a particularly hungry day, or a particularly full one - you may be able to spot trends and see which foods are most filling (or appetite inducing) that way.

    What are your stats? How much does MFP tell you to eat? Given you only have 30 lbs to lose, I'd stick to no more than 1 lb per week rate of loss, and once you lose the first ten lbs, drop that to a half lb per week. I'd also suggest making sure you are drinking plenty of water and getting some regular exercise (eat back half your exercise calories).

    You can totally do this! Dropping 90 lbs is a major victory. You know what to do :)
  • jennb2096
    jennb2096 Posts: 34 Member
    I have an almost one year old that is breastfed. I added 300 calories to my daily goal. I don't feel hungry most days. Although after I had him I wanted to eat everything in sight.
  • cheeki119
    cheeki119 Posts: 53 Member
    Any bf mums feel free to add. I've set my calorie goal as 1300 which I'm thinking now is maybe low. I go over but I walk it off. I didn't think cutting calories when overweight would effect my supply if I keep drinking I may be wrong?. I aim for 2l a day but end up with nearly 3 usually. I have lost 3.8lb so far this time counting. I need another 18.6lb to be at my pre birth obsession state haha. My ultimate aim is another 83.6lb
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    Took me 10 years to lose my baby weight :)
  • Chef_Barbell
    Chef_Barbell Posts: 6,644 Member
    I'll be here soon enough. I am going to eat all the foods while I am BFing and worry about the weight at some future time.
  • EttaMaeMartin
    EttaMaeMartin Posts: 303 Member
    enjoy your time with your babies, they do get big so fast. don't worry so much about weight, just enjoy this time that will never come again. when i breastfed, not trying, but it literally sucked all the weight off of me!
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    you stated: "I've had 1900 calories today and feel deprived, hungry and grumpy! Granted it's only day 2 for me but I feel awful!"

    First I hope that the 1900 includs enough calories for breastfeeding (300 - 500 calories).

    Lastly, its only been 2 days.. How about giving yourself a break, you just had a baby, no need to be cranky, grumpy around your newborn and the others around you.. Take your time.
  • Purplebunnysarah
    Purplebunnysarah Posts: 3,252 Member
    cheeki119 wrote: »
    Any bf mums feel free to add. I've set my calorie goal as 1300 which I'm thinking now is maybe low. I go over but I walk it off. I didn't think cutting calories when overweight would effect my supply if I keep drinking I may be wrong?. I aim for 2l a day but end up with nearly 3 usually. I have lost 3.8lb so far this time counting. I need another 18.6lb to be at my pre birth obsession state haha. My ultimate aim is another 83.6lb

    While obese and nursing, I had supply issues whenever I went lower than 2000 calories. I could lose eating almost 3000 calories up until I went back to work (the week my baby turned 1) and we went from nursing 6 times a day to twice a day.
  • WinterSkies
    WinterSkies Posts: 940 Member
    When I started on MFP in 2015, my daughter was about 9 months, and was nursing pretty frequently. I had a decent amount of weight to lose (60lb), so I set my calories for 2lb/week loss. I think it had me around 1850. I then added back in 300 calories per day for breastfeeding. As she reduced her nursing sessions, I reduced the added calories. I think I was adding back in 200/day at around a year. There are entries in the food diary that have negative calories for nursing - just be sure to choose the situation that most represents yours.

    On the "grumpy and hungry" front, I have taken several extended breaks over the past year and a half (for the sake of my sanity, and to celebrate special occasions). I have consistently found the first 5-7 days back on MFP to be extraordinarily difficult. The feeling of hunger seems to be intensified for those first few days, and it really sucks. However, once I'm past that first week, I get used to the feeling again, and am able to stick to my calories well enough for my purposes.
  • lissmayer
    lissmayer Posts: 86 Member
    I am another person who had to choose between supply and losing any baby weight. That whole breastfeeding makes you lose easily thing isn't really accurate for many people IME- at least whilst baby is exclusively (or mostly) BF. However, it sure is nice to have the "extra" BF calories once baby is eating food, and I do shift focus to weight. :)

    I've had good results with Mother's Milk tea for supply. And lactation cookies. ;) My current baby is 16 months and kinda meh about food, so I just keep an eye on my supply and increase calories, do skin to skin, and use the tea if it starts to dip. I always eat at maintenance during my period because my supply reliably dips then.
  • jennb2096
    jennb2096 Posts: 34 Member
    I found Gatorade helped with my supply. I started drinking the low calorie kind since there is a lot in the regular.
  • ominousdusk
    ominousdusk Posts: 62 Member
    Some people have a really hard time losing weight while nursing no matter what they do. a friend of mine tried a lot of things, then as soon as she weaned those last 30lbs came right off.
    this is my third time trying to lose the baby weight while nursing. My youngest is currently 5 months, i was having trouble losing weight because nursing made me so ravenously hungry. I started doing keto because i figured it would be easiest as i was craving a lot of fat and protein anyway.
    It's been less than 3 months and i've lost almost 30lbs. I eat about 2300 calories a day (i'm 5'9") based on my TDEE and adding for nursing. I dont exercise, but if i did i would eat 200-300 more. I never have that "grumpy hungry" feeling anymore. Make sure you are eating enough. Calculate your TDEE and add those calories for nursing. If you dont eat enough you might have a harder time losing, you also more likely to binge or choose not so great foods. I know if I go under 2000 calories my weight does not budge.
    Lastly, please go easy on yourself. hormones have a huge effect on our ability to lose weight.
  • lissmayer
    lissmayer Posts: 86 Member
    Also- I don't ever allow hungry and grouchy to happen. If I feel those things, I eat more. I've been making milk and/or pregnant (and tandem nursed for awhile) for a good 4.5 years in a row. That's a feat, and I deserve not to be hungry or crabby- even if it means I lose weight a little bit more slowly. It's a long game, and I want to befriend my body and listen to its signals. :) Plus my teething toddler is crabby enough for both of us.
  • tlflag1620
    tlflag1620 Posts: 1,358 Member
    lissmayer wrote: »
    Also- I don't ever allow hungry and grouchy to happen. If I feel those things, I eat more. I've been making milk and/or pregnant (and tandem nursed for awhile) for a good 4.5 years in a row. That's a feat, and I deserve not to be hungry or crabby- even if it means I lose weight a little bit more slowly. It's a long game, and I want to befriend my body and listen to its signals. :) Plus my teething toddler is crabby enough for both of us.

    I agree! I've also been pregnant and/or lactating (sometimes both) for over ten years now (holy crap). Going hungry is bad for adherence. Make sure your calorie goal is high enough to satisfy, and focus on filling foods. With my first three it took me anywhere from 12 months to 18 months to lose the baby weight. With my fourth child (current nursing) it only took 8 months. I had the same amount to lose each time, but this time I focused on filling foods so I didn't have the adherence issues. No one likes going hungry, and pregnancy and lactation create a special kind of hungry :D

  • ChickenmommaMich
    ChickenmommaMich Posts: 60 Member
    Thanks for the kind words! MFP gives me 1570 calories a day and I add 250 for breastfeeding. I've set my weight loss goal at 0.5lb a week.

    I like the idea of focusing on fat and protein because they provide the most "satisfaction". I rarely eat meat, so it seems impossible to avoid carbs! For protein I eat a lot of dairy, some almonds and try to include a few bean recipes a week.

    I'm on day 4 now and it's already a lot better. My hunger isn't quite as intense, therefore I'm not as grumpy :wink: I've gone over a year now of practically *never* feeling hunger so it's tough to deal with that all of a sudden.

    I don't exercise. I teach elementary/middle school children and take care of my little one.

    I think the drop in calories has affected my supply :( I'll have to keep track of how much lost supply and my weight to see how things are going. I'd really really like to drop this weight, but not at the expense of my little one.

    Please feel free to friend me. I've been inactive for a long time and could use new active friends to motivate me!
  • lissmayer
    lissmayer Posts: 86 Member
    Something that helped me was to set my priorities since the balance between losing weight and keeping supply seemed a bit fragile.

    Mine are: 1 my mental health and happiness 2 continuing the breastfeeding relationship 3 losing the baby weight. If I have to choose between losing the weight or losing the milk, I'll just put off weight loss til I wean. (And if bf starts weighing on my emotional reserves, I'll wean.)

    So far I've managed my supply ok whilst losing by eating at maintenance if I notice a dip, skin to skin, and tea- but having my priorities sorted in my head has taken off some of the pressure. The external pressure to drop the baby weight is kinda intense, and I don't want that to get conflated with my priorities, I guess. It helped me not feel weird when I chose not to lose- and now that I am, it's helping me not want to get competitive or anything. :)
  • adaouk
    adaouk Posts: 8 Member
    I need a bit of help. I'm 5'7 and 174lbs. Have about 30 to lose. My baby is 13 weeks. I've been eating around 2000-2300 calories per day. Exclusively breastfeeding and working out three times a week for half hour and walking most days. I've been doing this for almost two months now with not one pound lost!!! I'm getting demotivated and frustrated. Any help would be great!
  • lissmayer
    lissmayer Posts: 86 Member
    adaouk wrote: »
    I need a bit of help. I'm 5'7 and 174lbs. Have about 30 to lose. My baby is 13 weeks. I've been eating around 2000-2300 calories per day. Exclusively breastfeeding and working out three times a week for half hour and walking most days. I've been doing this for almost two months now with not one pound lost!!! I'm getting demotivated and frustrated. Any help would be great!

    Not really help but solidarity. Some people can't keep weight on whilst nursing; some of us can't lose it without losing milk supply. :( For me, I was fukt on weight loss until my nurslings were firmly doing solids (around a year old). It's not a universal maxim, of course, but for me it was a "you can have everything, but you can't have everything at once" kinda thing. FWIW, 13 weeks is very new. Things might change for you in a bit. Congrats BTW. :)
  • SusanMFindlay
    SusanMFindlay Posts: 1,804 Member
    adaouk wrote: »
    I need a bit of help. I'm 5'7 and 174lbs. Have about 30 to lose. My baby is 13 weeks. I've been eating around 2000-2300 calories per day. Exclusively breastfeeding and working out three times a week for half hour and walking most days. I've been doing this for almost two months now with not one pound lost!!! I'm getting demotivated and frustrated. Any help would be great!

    How are you measuring that 2000-2300 calories per day? Are you weighing food or guesstimating? If you're not weighing, you might want to try that as it's very very easy to underestimate calories otherwise.
  • adaouk
    adaouk Posts: 8 Member
    I do have a scale and weigh everything and follow portions. I guess I just may be one of those people that just don't lose weight while nursing
  • lissmayer
    lissmayer Posts: 86 Member
    adaouk wrote: »
    I do have a scale and weigh everything and follow portions. I guess I just may be one of those people that just don't lose weight while nursing

    Give yourself some time. At 13 weeks, your body is working like a *kitten* to sustain you plus an infant who is growing super fast- both physically but also in terms of developmental gains. The picture could look very different in a few weeks or months when baby's weight gain slows down and solids start to take some of the burden off your body. You are barely leaving the fourth trimester right now, Mama. :)<3