Newly broken up :(

bobfernandes wrote: »

I know how it is. My adult life being someone and after 22 years, its over. Not easy and it makes staying motivated to lose weight and get healthier even harder because I'd rather just eat my sorrows away.

I had the opposite. I couldn't eat all last week :-/

Cutaway_Collar wrote: »

bearbugbear wrote: »

Cutaway_Collar wrote: »

bearbugbear wrote: »

I'm so sad and lonely, I have never been alone before.

Why aren't you dating?

It's been less than a month and I have three children, their father doesn't take them away much. I'm concentrating on creating a calm, healing home life for them. It's really lonely when they go to bed though.

rugratz2015 wrote: »

bearbugbear wrote: »

I'm so sad and lonely, I have never been alone before.

That's a good thing! it will teach you to enjoy your own company, make your own decisions/mistakes, be selfish and generally get to know yourself better. Figure out what you want out of life and how to get it without having to take anyone else into consideration! Time to focus on you and celebrate !!! do things on your own, travel, meet new friends, be nice to yourself x

Thanks, I need to try to enjoy these things but it's so much harder than I expected.

So you just sit and knit sweaters by the fire after they go to bed?

Sign up for a dating app and text 5 guys concurrently and mislead all of them. You are not looking for anything serious at this moment right? Now is the time to lead ten men on and sit back and enjoy the attention.

I agree you need to be careful about not getting involved too soon with kids in the picture. But there is are plenty of fools on the dating scene looking for hooking up and you can game them at will. Happy hunting

FIFY I just HAD to do that.

I agree with @rugratz2015, use this time to just DO YOU. Stay single, in fact actively avoid dating for a while. Get to know yourself outside of a relationship, learn to enjoy your own company and function on your own. Get a babysitter and go out with some girlfriends! The more you sit around and feel sorry for yourself the lonelier you'll feel. And the lonelier you allow yourself to get the more apt you are to go for the wrong guy just to "have someone". You're better than that.

Cutaway_Collar wrote: »

Paging

@GnothiSeauton23
@PowerMan40
@Maximus
@total_e

Who did I miss?

I'm crushed; absolutely crushed.

kgecik wrote: »

My guy didn't disappear or poof as you said. Things were great. We had a few trips planned as far out as December. I felt like I needed to KNOW that he liked me (duh how basic). When he asked he clammed up so I broke it off. Haven't talked to him in 4 weeks.

Sometimes even when you make the right choice it still hurts like hell though.

Also, I went on a few dating sites and it was gross.

So YOU broke up with him because he didn't TELL you he liked you? Yet he was attentive, took you on trips, you met his family, they bought you plane tickets to spend a major holiday and you got along just great. Hmmm...sounds like he liked you. I'd be sad too if I blew that one.

edit to include AND he willingly hung out with your son? SMH

I hadn't taken the knitting comment seriously! But perhaps it will be my next big love

kgecik wrote: »

Anyone else? We were together ten months. He was a commitment phobe. We traveled together, I hung out with his family and was even going on a Christmas trip with them--he let them buy me a ticket--and he willingly hung out with my son.

Turns out he "didn't like me like that".

It hurts. Other than the whole couldn't tell me he liked me part we got along splendidly.

Eh tough so I feel ya. Fortunately you didn't waste a lot of time and can find someone even better.

All the best.

kgecik wrote: »

@j_surita3
Yeah of course the actions speak louder than words, but there never were any words. He said he didn't have those feelings for me, but his actions completely said the opposite which is why it's so confusing and heart breaking.

So would you stay with someone who never told you in almost a year that he liked you? Not even once?

In retrospect, no I would not - here is my story:

I was in a 5 year roller coaster relationship with a man who always told me he liked me and all, but that he knew I was "not the one", and I was not looking for anything permanent at that time, so I didn't really mind (I was newly divorced for the second time, no rush to jump back into that cesspool). But it did start to take it's toll, and I could not understand why he wasted his time if I was "not the one". So I finally cut him loose. It was hard. I was a wreck for a while. Then I got over it and moved on.

And then he came back a year later. And he said all the right things and I took him back. And I thought he had gotten past whatever demons he had before. And 18 years and one child later, and 15 years of being more like roommates, he left me. Said he was not happy, that he had felt family pressure to get the perfect wife and kid and home, and it still didn't make him happy. He found someone that worshiped the ground he walked on. And once again I had to get past it. And I did.

So anyone reading this can use it as a PSA, that it's all a crap shoot.

And if you get lonely, come join us in the Singles Hangout here in Chit-Chat, be more than a drive by poster, and have some fun online. Without the meat market online dating crap. There is shameless flirting, bad puns, fun memes, and caring folks that support each other in good and bad times. Oh, and food porn of course.