Very long but I need help and motivation


I'm struggling...like really badly. Over the summer I worked really hard and broke the 300 barrier that I was stuck on for the entire summer I stopped working out and eating right because my grandmother got really sick and passed away. The in and out of the hospital killed the diet killed the time for exercise. I also wasn't working as much and grad school was starting so I had no time and no money to pay for my trainer. After 2 months I completely went backwards. Gained 10 lbs in two months...have eaten fast food 2-3 times a day...turning to u healthy foods and being lazy again. I see what I worked so hard for disappear. My clothes were getting tight again. My favorite jacket now won't button unless I suck everything in. I'm losing faith and hope in myself. I'm lost honestly and don't know how to get out. I need motivation. I need help and suggestions. I'm 21 and I weigh 310lbs and I don't want to be I want to be 21 and weigh in the 250s. Please this is my last option or it's not going to be good and before I know it I'll weight almost 400 and I don't want that at all but for some reason I can't find the will power or motivation to keep up and change. So please someone reach out and help.

Replies

  • courtneyfabulous
    courtneyfabulous Posts: 1,863 Member
    The most important thing is you want to make a change. Now you just need to decide to start and to not let life's ups & downs derail you.

    Maybe try a kitchen purge to have a new start- get rid of junk food and trigger foods from your pantry & fridge & freezer & cupboards... then go grocery shopping for healthy foods and snacks and Tupperware for meal planning & bringing your own food with you when you need to instead of picking up takeout.

    Keep some treat foods- you can still have a little indulgence each day if you keep it small and keep to your calories.

    Get a digital food scale and track EVERYTHING you eat (on good days AND bad days). And get a scale to weigh yourself every morning- a body composition measuring scale would be best, and keep track of your weight & body fat percentage.

    Start cooking for yourself. If you don't know how then learn! There's plenty of help for you online. And it's fun!

    You know you don't need to only workout with your trainer- you can go to the gym on your own. And when you can't make it to the gym you can go for a walk at least or do an at home workout. Check out the YouTube channel fitnessblender for some good ones- many are only 15 or 20 minutes so you can fit that in even if you're busy. I like to use exercise to de-stress & get my "me time". Don't let it be a chore, make it part of your normal routine.

    Time to think of this as your new way of life, not a diet or something temporary. Also try to focus on health not just losing weight. (The calorie deficit is temporary, since you will go back up to maintenance calories once you are happy with your weight, but tracking & eating healthy will be necessary forever).

    I would also suggest you aim for a weight that starts with the number 1. A body weight of 250lbs is still pretty unhealthy. I think you can get to the low 200s or high 100s.

    Also inspiration is important- check out the YouTube channel Obese to Beast. Really inspirational young guy went from over 300 lbs to a normal weight & buff! He's real sweet too. Also check out Cookie Miller- similar story and another great channel to watch for inspo & advice.

    Good luck
    You can do it!!
  • sharondjs
    sharondjs Posts: 676 Member
    Hi
    I agree with what has already been said No one ever plans to fail but fails from not planning, you are a smart young woman who must already have awesome planning skills your in grad school :smiley: well done, now put those same smarts to work on a plan you can stick to ..

    A set of kitchen scales and a slow cooker are both cheap and make life so much easier, I have lots of frozen pre cooked meals in my freezer so i don't get caught in a rush or with nothing to eat ..
    I cook brown rice & freeze in 50 gram lots cut up cooked chicken & freeze to add to meals , boil a few eggs they last cooked for days , cut up fruit and veg for snacking on & I take my lunch & smoko's with me to work in a cooler bag , No Buying rubbishy foods that way :)
    Frozen fruit is great in a protein smoothie for breakfast or after a workout and great for you .
    Sit down and work out what you like eating whats the healthiest easiest foods for you to have.

    As an example i don't really like vegetables ( love salad) so i grate sweet potato , zucchini & carrot into my slow cooker add tomatoes Beef herbs & red lentils , The veggies and lentils become the sauce and it all tastes fantastic freezes well has loads of protein & fiber is filling .This is one of my go to fav meals no stress no fuss .
    Find some of these kind of recipes load them into mfp it will give you the calorie count per serve all done .

    Getting motivated to workout can take a bit, so start off with something you enjoy swimming a class workout or just walk . Utube has heaps of free 10 minute to more workouts dance, weights cardio there are heaps . Join a gym I know lots of people won't they feel to intimidated but the group classes like zumba and body combat are awesome & trust me everyone is way to busy trying to breath themselves they don't care about anyone else .

    Good luck and remember every day every meal is another chance to do better don't be to hard on your self .



  • mari5466
    mari5466 Posts: 137 Member
    Add me. Having people on MFP can help keep you on track and put reminders to log your food. This system works just you have to give it a chance to work. You need to be ready to make a lifestyle change or when you get to 250 you'll just go back to 300. Take it one day at a time but start making some of those changes.
  • dejavuohlala
    dejavuohlala Posts: 1,821 Member
    I'm struggling...like really badly. Over the summer I worked really hard and broke the 300 barrier that I was stuck on for the entire summer I stopped working out and eating right because my grandmother got really sick and passed away. The in and out of the hospital killed the diet killed the time for exercise. I also wasn't working as much and grad school was starting so I had no time and no money to pay for my trainer. After 2 months I completely went backwards. Gained 10 lbs in two months...have eaten fast food 2-3 times a day...turning to u healthy foods and being lazy again. I see what I worked so hard for disappear. My clothes were getting tight again. My favorite jacket now won't button unless I suck everything in. I'm losing faith and hope in myself. I'm lost honestly and don't know how to get out. I need motivation. I need help and suggestions. I'm 21 and I weigh 310lbs and I don't want to be I want to be 21 and weigh in the 250s. Please this is my last option or it's not going to be good and before I know it I'll weight almost 400 and I don't want that at all but for some reason I can't find the will power or motivation to keep up and change. So please someone reach out and help.

    You can do this, you need mutual supportive friends in here, one way support does not work. Feel free to friend me. Good luck
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    Weight management is about calories. It is not about eating a particular type of food or how much free time you have.
    What I would do is start planning your eating and logging. If you are going to eat fast food look up nutritional info for the places you go and find things that fit your goals.
    Plan meals. There is nothing wrong with quick foods like yogurt or a sandwich if you don't have time or skill to cook.
    Set your goal to lose 1 lb a week. I know you probably want to lose weight quickly but you need to be able to sustain your loss. 1 lb a week will get you there in time.

    Don't use food to deal with emotions, boredom, stress. Do something else.
  • BarbaraJatmfp
    BarbaraJatmfp Posts: 463 Member
    I've been where you are. I started at 328 and was ecstatic when I dropped below 300. For the first time in 18 years, I weighed below 300 pounds!

    Fast forward many months and I was in the 250s. Life changes happen, stress came into m y life, and I have gained 20 pounds. I am still well-below 300, but if I don't stop gaining, I will gain it all back plus 10% more. That means I am looking at a future weight of 360 pounds.

    So . . . what can you do to stop gaining?

    I think I would start with the fast food. I understand what the schedule is like for a grad student. (I have three degrees.) Sometimes you just need to grab what food is available because of time, friends going out, too tired to fix food, or just loneliness and you want to eat where there are people. Pick lower-calorie fast food. Subway has great lower calorie choices. If you skip the sauces on your sandwiches and the chips, you can get an excellent sandwich for about 400 calories. And it's very filling. (But skip the tuna fish. It's surprisingly high in calories!)

    Don't worry about the exercise right now. You will be running around campus a lot, but do look for opportunities to burn extra calories when possible. What about stairs? Taking the stairs down is better than taking the elevator. Taking the stairs up is even better, but I don't know if you are physically able to do that. And even one flight is better than none.

    I have been weighing myself every day. It reminds me that I am changing my food behaviors and activity behaviors. I will skip foods (fat foods) that I've been slipping in because I don't want to see even a .2 gain. I tried weighing weekly, monthly, and not at all, but that just led to 4- and 5-pound gains before I saw it on the scale. See if weighing daily works for you.

    You know what it takes to lose weight. You know how good it felt to be under 300 pounds. Remember that feeling and reacquire it.

    I know it's hard. I've been fighting it for months, but I'm not giving up. Giving up means 360 pounds, and I am not going there.

  • courtneyfabulous
    courtneyfabulous Posts: 1,863 Member
    Hi there!

    I noticed you haven't been logging your food. Tracking calories really is important for successful weight loss!

    I ate clean and worked out regularly for almost a year and yet barely lost any weight because despite a healthy diet & lifestyle I was eating at or above my maintenance calories. No deficit, no weight loss!

    I didn't start losing until I started tracking all my food & calories and adjusted my diet to stay within my daily calorie and macros goals. I even eat a little less healthy now than before- I found I can even have pizza or chocolate, etc as long as I keep the portions reasonable.

    We want to see you succeed, you want to make progress... time to start logging!
  • courtneyfabulous
    courtneyfabulous Posts: 1,863 Member
    It's been a week since you posted this- how are you doing?
  • Trish1c
    Trish1c Posts: 549 Member
    I'm sorry about your grandmother.

    Now is your time to start fresh. You don't need an expensive trainer. You do need to set MFP correctly, stick to the portions & move if you can.

    In grad school, park far from class. Take the stairs. Schedule some time to work out & treat it like the class you can't miss. Tape or download the lectures & listen to them or other study aids while you exercise.

    Food & portions are key. I haven't seen the inside of a gym in 3 weeks. I still lost 3 pounds by paying attention to my consumption. Logging forces you think about what you're eating

    Make grad school about changing more then your academic education
  • Athena_fit
    Athena_fit Posts: 55 Member
    I'm sorry you are having such a tough time. Life is life, and I hope you can move on from the tough few months you just had.

    Now seems like a great time to start fresh : and you seem very set on achieving your goals.

    Grad school can be hard...I put on a little more than 40 pounds by the time I finished it...take good eating and exercise habits now because it will help you get through it! Beeing a student, I know its hard to eat right (money and time), but here are a few tips that would have helped me a few years ago :

    - buy eggs and hard boil them so they are ready to grab and eat in the fridge (cheap eat + quality). Smash them with a little greek yogurt, hot sauce, salt and peper and eat with whole weat bread, or crackers and veggies (carrots and celeries are cheap and easy to prep in advance). Tadam, a sustaining healthy lunch! Omelettes can be life savers on week nights!
    - get familiar with beans and lentils ( budget friendly + quality). A crockpot can be a really good buy for a student (cooks while your away) and it can cook a chili with beans (which will last for days - you can even freeze some)
    - oats. Slow-cooker oats, overnight oats, regular oats. Cheap, healthy whole grain and will keep you full.
    - canned tuna, canned sardines. Great for lunches.
    - Cook big batches (you can use your slowcooker) on sundays. It's cheap, tou will have something to eat all week and your place will smell great!
    - go for frozen veggies and fruits (get them at costco if you can). The majority of the time they taste great, they are cheap and they avoid waste.

    Exercise when you can. But what you put in your body is what is most important. I suggest you start with one small challenge each week : replace sodas by water, make breakfast at home, prepare diner 4 times, etc. All the little things will add up.

    Breath in, breath out. You can do this. You can add me on your friend list if you want!
  • divcara
    divcara Posts: 357 Member
    If you can afford the trainer, I think it's a good investment. Having the accountability of a trainer really helps me stay on track, text every meal, someone to push me to get to the gym on my own. If you were having success when you had the trainer, maybe see what you can prioritize or cut in terms of finances to keep working with one, even if it's once a week. Weight loss and keeping consistent routines can be really difficult if you don't make it a top priority and everything else in life starts taking over.
  • laur357
    laur357 Posts: 896 Member
    Look into the wellness resources available from your school - most schools offer basic mental health counseling at no cost to students (they can help with stress, feeling overwhelmed, grief, etc). Therapy is almost always a good idea, especially when it's built into your university's health services.

    Make friends at your school's gym, schedule an interesting exercise class each semester, or look for free offerings from students - see if your school has a department with physical therapy or exercise science. You might get some free training or find a student willing to work with you at no cost. You don't need to exercise to lose weight, but regular exercise can improve your mood, cognitive function, and reduce stress.

    Also, take it easy on yourself - it might seem super urgent, but it's going to take a while to lose weight. Start building a new habit every few weeks, and get used to the change before you add more. Cook at home and pack lunches for the majority of your meals for a few weeks, then reduce your calories for a few weeks, then add in more walking or any movement that you enjoy, then try some new foods/exercises/hobbies to keep yourself interested. I firmly believe that you shouldn't do something to lose weight unless you can keep doing it long term.