Getting discouraged and bad feedback from others

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Jeckia
Jeckia Posts: 77 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hey everyone..

I've been on my weight loss journey for about 2 years I was just about 230lbs when I started. I was a size 20 and took a size shirt between a 2x-3x I was a big girl for being 5'2"

Since then I've lost a lot of weight... Well I think I have. I'm down to about 185-180ish it goes between there. I'm stuck and can't get past there. Anyways. I know fit into juniors clothes and for women's I take a size 8. Shirts I take a size medium or sometimes a large.

Some of my friends have said I look great, but I still get a lot of negative feedback saying I still don't look good in clothes or that I should lose more weight and it's really depressing.

At the moment I can't upload a photo because of the computer I'm on. But still. I guess that's still not good enough now a days for the public eyes to see. They want everyone to be super skinny.
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Replies

  • jessicapk
    jessicapk Posts: 574 Member
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    I second @JustMissTracy 's response! Those friends don't sound nice at all. They sound like they're a little jealous and just trying to bring you down to their level. F 'em! I would kill to drop my size 18/20's and wear a size 8 and I bet you're rocking it! Just keep working towards what YOU want in your life and ignore those nitwits who wish they were good enough to do the same.
  • Jeckia
    Jeckia Posts: 77 Member
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    Thank you everyone for your feedback :smile:
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    Jeckia wrote: »

    Some of my friends have said I look great,

    I guess that's still not good enough now a days for the public eyes to see. They want everyone to be super skinny.
    Listen only to the friends who say you look great. The others are not friends, or they are ill-informed about your body.
    Why give a whit what "public eyes" want to see, whatever that means? You are doing this for you, not for anyone else!
  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
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    As long as you are healthy it really doesn't matter what size you are as long as you're comfortable and happy. Most people who say the types of mean things you're hearing are insecure and that makes their comments more about them than you. You really don't need people like that in your life.

    A size 8 is not large. As long as you don't really need to be wearing a 12 and are spilling out of your size 8s :lol: no one has any kind of right to be criticizing what you wear. Heck, even then they'd be better off keeping their mouths shut.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,426 Member
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    I was 179 lbs and 5'4" and it was not a healthy weight. I hurt a lot- hips, knees, back. I was slow. I got out of breath climbing stairs in my house. It was hard to walk very far without my legs hurting. I was tired a lot. I didn't sleep well. That isn't a good way to live. No one said anything about my appearance but I needed to lose weight to live the life I wanted. Losing 20 lbs made a big difference to my functioning.

    If you are happy and healthy that is what is important not the size of your clothing or what people say. You've come a long way. No one should make you feel that isn't good enough or push you to be a certain size because of appearance.
    It is up to you if you want to lose more weight or not. It is not impossible to lose more when you are ready.
  • brenn24179
    brenn24179 Posts: 2,144 Member
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    you are doing great! there is a lot of crazy people out there, weigh what you want, it is your business.
  • divcara
    divcara Posts: 357 Member
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    Drop those awful friends and you'll instantly lose a few hundred pounds.
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
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    Great job with the loss. It's up to you if you want to lose more or not.
    Jeckia wrote: »
    Some of my friends have said I look great, but I still get a lot of negative feedback saying I still don't look good in clothes or that I should lose more weight and it's really depressing.

    Why are people commenting on your body or opining on whether you should lose more weight? How does this come up? Have you asked for their opinion? It just sounds odd to me. If they really are telling you things like you look bad in clothes and need to lose weight without being prompted, that does seem really aggressive and not like much of a friend, IMO.
  • daedae171
    daedae171 Posts: 247 Member
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    If anybody doesn't have anything nice to say about how you look or how much work you put in to lose the unwanted weight, then drop them! Mostly, it's people who don't have any willpower whatsoever to do what you've been doing for the longest time, so all they do is show negativity towards your success. It's the people who don't wanna even try to lose weight like you have. Screw em! They're dead weight. You keep climbing up towards your goals and don't let anybody's negative comments grab you by your ankle and pull you down. You're doing what they wish they could do. You got this!
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
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    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    Great job with the loss. It's up to you if you want to lose more or not.
    Jeckia wrote: »
    Some of my friends have said I look great, but I still get a lot of negative feedback saying I still don't look good in clothes or that I should lose more weight and it's really depressing.

    Why are people commenting on your body or opining on whether you should lose more weight? How does this come up? Have you asked for their opinion? It just sounds odd to me. If they really are telling you things like you look bad in clothes and need to lose weight without being prompted, that does seem really aggressive and not like much of a friend, IMO.

    Pretty much all of this. I treasure my friends, especially the blunt ones who give me direct feedback even if it isn't always what I wanted to hear... but none of them would ever remark negatively about my appearance or tell me clothes don't look good on me or that I needed to lose more weight unless I specifically asked those type of questions!

    I can't imagine a situation where this kind of commentary would be provided unsolicited, unless I was doing something completely dangerous or unhealthy, and OP from what you've described, it doesn't sound like that's the case at all.
  • Jeckia
    Jeckia Posts: 77 Member
    edited October 2016
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    WinoGelato wrote: »


    Are you in the US? That sizing doesn't sound quite right? I'm 5'2 also and was also in between a size 8-10 when I started but I was 155? I know the sizes vary quite a bit depending on where you shop and also from different countries the sizing is completely different.

    Hey @WinoGelato The pant's that I'm wearing are a size 8 I have a few that are a size 8. Like my work pants and stuff. They fit totally normal I have a digital scale... It's kind of funny because I can step on it and it say's one weight and then I step off let it clear and step on it again and it says something totally different. I also weigh myself in the morning as well. Oh and yes I'm in the US

    So maybe my scale is really wrong... I had the same scale prior and there was in fact something wrong with it and I had to bring it back to bed bath and beyond. It's one of those weight watchers scales. What it was doing the original one was. I'd step on it. Weigh myself. let it clear and reset. My boyfriend would step on it and it would say he weigh's the same weight and well at that time NO WAY did he weigh the same as me. Then my grandmother would step on it and it said she weighed the same too and she's 4'5"FT lol

    So.... idk..... Any takes on a scale to get that works good?

  • LemonLady13
    LemonLady13 Posts: 14 Member
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    I hear ya, sista! I'd love to be your friend. We can help each other. :);)
  • Mollie672
    Mollie672 Posts: 10 Member
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    You. Lost. 45 - 50. Pounds. That is totally awesome! That is an amazing achievement, and to h--- with anyone who doesn't see what a great job you've done. As for anyone who makes rude comments, I say call them on it. Look straight at them, and bluntly tell them that was a very rude thing to say.
  • EspressoLvr
    EspressoLvr Posts: 100 Member
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    People who matter don't mind, and people who mind don't matter. That's some real wisdom, I tell ya!

    Also, change the battery in your scale, could help, that's what I do when my scale gives wildly different weights within seconds of each weigh.

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