How to deal with unsupportive people?

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JennyJen82
JennyJen82 Posts: 14 Member
in Chit-Chat
Anybody have expierence with these types of people? I can't just get rid of my husband lol. He eats junk around me and does that whole "mmm it's so good" thing when I'm sitting right there. I get it he can eat whatever, but come on. I don't have friends around where I live to workout with so I ask him to go and he never does.
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  • DjPorkchop73
    DjPorkchop73 Posts: 16 Member
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    I have a lot of people who do that to me. Ironically enough, the best and most awesome support I get are from my friends and acquaintances on the net that I know and speak to daily. It is hard to deal with at times. I just brush it off and keep on doing what I'm doing.

    One good example is when I see someone putting a big fat dip in their mouth. I gave it up 410 days ago and to me, it was the most awesome part of my day having a dip. Now days, I just keep right on with my day. I don't let them poisoning their own self bother me any. In fact, I feel bad for them.

    Just brush people off and keep doing what your doing.
  • JennyJen82
    JennyJen82 Posts: 14 Member
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    Omg that's awesome!
  • asrai50
    asrai50 Posts: 937 Member
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    I think people that try to sabotage you or are unsupportive probably in some part of their psyche really dont want you to change. Maybe its a fear that you will become different or won't want to be with them anymore. Sometimes I think our partners may even be a little scared of losing us. Try and find the reason why they feel this way and address the concern...maybe they will become your biggest supporters after all :)
  • thisonetimeatthegym
    thisonetimeatthegym Posts: 1,977 Member
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    JennyJen82 wrote: »
    Anybody have expierence with these types of people? I can't just get rid of my husband lol. He eats junk around me and does that whole "mmm it's so good" thing when I'm sitting right there. I get it he can eat whatever, but come on. I don't have friends around where I live to workout with so I ask him to go and he never does.

    Think of it as part of your training. You are going to be dealing with people enjoying their food - there is no getting away from it.

    I cook pancakes and bacon for my family, then enjoy a cup of coffee for myself. Plus I bake elaborate desserts, then enjoy a small piece while the others stuff their faces.

    Instead of being angry at him, ask yourself if it is fair for him to stop enjoying his food because you have decided to change something about yours?
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,526 Member
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    JennyJen82 wrote: »
    Anybody have expierence with these types of people? I can't just get rid of my husband lol. He eats junk around me and does that whole "mmm it's so good" thing when I'm sitting right there. I get it he can eat whatever, but come on. I don't have friends around where I live to workout with so I ask him to go and he never does.
    I made a thread about this awhile back.

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10134341/you-arent-always-going-to-get-support/p1

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
  • thisonetimeatthegym
    thisonetimeatthegym Posts: 1,977 Member
    edited October 2016
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    thisonetimeatthegym wrote: »
    JennyJen82 wrote: »
    Anybody have expierence with these types of people? I can't just get rid of my husband lol. He eats junk around me and does that whole "mmm it's so good" thing when I'm sitting right there. I get it he can eat whatever, but come on. I don't have friends around where I live to workout with so I ask him to go and he never does.

    Think of it as part of your training. You are going to be dealing with people enjoying their food - there is no getting away from it.

    I cook pancakes and bacon for my family, then enjoy a cup of coffee for myself. Plus I bake elaborate desserts, then enjoy a small piece while the others stuff their faces.

    Instead of being angry at him, ask yourself if it is fair for him to stop enjoying his food because you have decided to change something about yours?

    Also, this is why I keep mum about food, calories, whatever.

    They know I eat a lot less than I used to, but when they say something, I don't direct it to losing weight. When they buy you 4 candy bars because they were on sale, thank them, give them a kiss, and eat half of one in front of their face, then later, make sure your kiddos find them.
  • JennyJen82
    JennyJen82 Posts: 14 Member
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    Yes you're right... I guess I need to have more willpower.
  • thisonetimeatthegym
    thisonetimeatthegym Posts: 1,977 Member
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    JennyJen82 wrote: »
    Yes you're right... I guess I need to have more willpower.

    It's not about willpower. It's about practice.

    It gets much easier over time.

    Maybe you should pray for an easier go at it.
  • jvcjim
    jvcjim Posts: 812 Member
    edited October 2016
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    punch to the throat, taser, ax through the head, multiple gunshots.... repeat as necessary or until the police drop by. :)
  • daedae171
    daedae171 Posts: 247 Member
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    jvcjcooper wrote: »
    punch to the throat, taser, ax through the head, multiple gunshots.... repeat as necessary or until the police drop by. :)

    Well that escalated quickly.
  • PixelPuff
    PixelPuff Posts: 901 Member
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    Tell them outright that what they are doing is un-supportive, and you recognize that they are doing it. And to not do it, lest piss you off. They don't have to join you in exercising/etc if they don't want to, as this is something you decided to do, but they shouldn't try to harm your progress.
  • mph323
    mph323 Posts: 3,565 Member
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    In my mind there's a line between eating whatever one chooses around a person on a diet and being actively unsupportive (and disrespectful ) of those choices. Eating snack food around the person trying to lose weight falls into the first category. People need to learn how to co-exist side by side with loved ones who don't share the same eating plan. Sitting next to them making yummy noises falls into the second.
  • JennyJen82
    JennyJen82 Posts: 14 Member
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    That's what I'm saying. Yea it sucks he eats it around me, but please don't get up in my face with the noises. I did ask if he would support me in losing weight and his reply was "you're fine the way you are". Umm no I'm not.
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,725 Member
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    JennyJen82 wrote: »
    Anybody have expierence with these types of people? I can't just get rid of my husband lol. He eats junk around me and does that whole "mmm it's so good" thing when I'm sitting right there. I get it he can eat whatever, but come on. I don't have friends around where I live to workout with so I ask him to go and he never does.

    So make some :)
  • NYactor1
    NYactor1 Posts: 9,642 Member
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    If you are Joe Biden, you take them "out behind the gym". They will become very supportive after that.
  • NamVetJim
    NamVetJim Posts: 51 Member
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    Tolerate them as much as you can.
  • Calvillo9445NYS
    Calvillo9445NYS Posts: 1 Member
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    I'm in the same situation. The easiest thing is to prep your meals and snacks ahead of time that way you're not tempted when he breaks out the chips. Once you start seeing positive changes to your body, the lack of support will stop bothering you. Be your own hero. It seems like the junk food left my system after three weeks of eating completely clean and I didn't crave it anymore. Six weeks in and I'm down 16% body fat. Keep going!

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