Why does there have to be a gimmick?
ds41980
Posts: 133 Member
So yesterday when I was leaving work I was stopped by a coworker who asked if I had lost weight. I said yes and thanks for noticing. Then she asked me how, was I cutting carbs? I said no, I told her that I went on the Internet, calculated how many calories I need to consume to function for a day, took 500 calories off of that number and eat whatever I want within the calories that are left. I am losing average 1 lb per week. She then gave me a look that asked "what? You mean there's no special gimmick? How could that possibly work?" Then she said well good luck. I had this same experience with a friend earlier. I guess I am trying to understand why people would rather give the credit of their weight loss to something other than themselves? I don't know the experience just left me feeling annoyed and frustrated for some reason. Anyone else had this experience?
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Replies
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Yes but to be fair, I thought for years that I had to cut the foods I love forever if I wanted to lose too (and maintain my weight loss later)... Unfortunately, that you just have to eat less doesn't make money so nobody's talking about it.5
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All the time. I believe it's because there's so much misinformation out there - mostly, seemingly, to sell magazines and books - that people think that there must be a trick.
That, and that if people realized how simple the concept of weight management is - not necessarily implementing it, but the concept - they might have to own up to having some responsibility. Unfortunately, taking personal responsibility seems to be lacking in many facets of life these days.
I'm sure there are other factors, but those are - IMHO - the two biggest reasons.9 -
It's harder for people to eat healthy and exercise rather than have a gimmick or quick fix/cure all.2
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I think what they are really asking is how do you stay motivated? How do you keep exercising and eating within a calorie goal?2
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Tell them you lost weight by doing exactly the same as usual, but you suck on a pinecone for 30 minutes each night.18
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I don't know the experience just left me feeling annoyed and frustrated for some reason. Anyone else had this experience?
haven't had it but it sounds like she just blew off all the work you did to get your results. she made it seem like it didn't count because it wasn't shiny or coated in glop of some kind. i feel like gimmick-hunting diminishes 'us'.
i feel that way when people ask about my bike commuting and then say 'oh i could never do that' in this dismissive tone. always feels like, then why did you ask if you're just going to blow me off? you could at least be polite about the time i invested in taking your query seriously.
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scarlettsky7 wrote: »It's harder for people to eat healthy and exercise rather than have a gimmick or quick fix/cure all.
This. People want it to be some super easy, fast solution. Like, just don't eat chocolate on Wednesdays and the weight will fall off. When they find out it is actually a lot of work, they become less interested. I was the same way for years before I started losing weight. I knew I could do it with a lot of hard work, I just found ways to justify not doing it. It is what it is.
At the end of the day, we should celebrate our own successes, and keep going after more
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I had someone complement me on my progress and ask the same, "How did you do it?" I answered simply, "I ate less and walked more." He got this disappointed look on his face. I think for some of us when we really aren't ready to make a change for life, a quick-fix or gimmick that allows us to keep doing what we've been doing but miraculously (and quickly) get slim and fit is is the only thing we're willing to consider. I know that is what I wanted in the past decades of being overweight... to keep doing the same things I'd been doing but in a magically smaller body.4
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Just carry some prayer beads with you and tell them that you'll sell them your weight loss prayer beads. It enriches you and teaches them that gimmicks don't work.3
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There's a simple reason for this: Most people are completely unaware of how much they are actually eating, think they are much more active than they are, and are not educated on nutrition, fitness, and weight loss.
They figure there needs to be some trick out there that they are missing, because they really "don't eat that much," when in reality they do, our perceptions of portions are just so screwed up. In the US, we end up with huge portions in order to feel like we are getting enough bang for our buck, and don't realize that what we consider one reasonable piece is actually closer to 3 portions.
We also assume we burn way more calories in our daily activity than we actually do, so they idea of trying to squeeze in more activity is daunting. And not getting proper education about these things means that we figure we are already doing everything right, there's just something wrong with us that we need a special gimmick or pill to fix (which we also probably owe to the healthcare system in part, at least in the US).
I don't let it bother me. Even MFP is a "gimmick" in a way, in that using the app aids people in weight loss and guides them on how to do it. I think that's what most people are looking for anyway, just some clear directions as to what to do. It's why certain programs are so popular - eat within these food limitations for this amount of time. Clear parameters and a clear timeline within which to see results. It appeals to us as humans.1 -
Well to be fair it's true that some people have to completely overhaul their diet if they want to lose.
I know people who 'don't eat much' but what they eat is bread and jam for breakfast, Starbuck drinks, then things like cordon bleu or sausages with mashed potatoes for dinner (and a small dessert). So yeah... might not be much or often, but it's all high calorie stuff that it would be hard to 'eat less of' without being hungry if you want to stick to a reasonable calorie deficit (which is why the whole 'just eat less of what you like' thing drives me nuts).
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@Alatariel75 you're a riot!
@DS41980 what an annoying co-worker - I'd be irritated with her too.
Since she didn't say it, I will: Great job - your hard work has really paid off!1 -
canadianlbs wrote: »I don't know the experience just left me feeling annoyed and frustrated for some reason. Anyone else had this experience?
i feel that way when people ask about my bike commuting and then say 'oh i could never do that' in this dismissive tone. always feels like, then why did you ask if you're just going to blow me off? you could at least be polite about the time i invested in taking your query seriously.
On the upside..I've had occasions where people have prodded and kept prompting me when I've tried to be brief, asking questions and I know light bulbs are going off for them by the caliber of what they're asking. Rare but it happens. It's nice to watch the unfolding.
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Oh, I get it. I've been that way most of my life. I think it's just human nature to want there to be an easier way. You can pack the pounds on so quickly after all. Most people think there has to be a way to get them off as quickly.
And most of the gimmicky plans that are out there feed on the notion of "we've all been doing it wrong and look, if you just do it THIS way, it'll all be fine again. It's based on science. Yeah, it's based on science."
So far, though, the only one who asked me a lot of questions about what precisely I've been doing was my GP and I think that was mostly to make sure I wasn't out there eating nothing but cabbage soup or paying some quack money. Once she found out it was the calorie deficit thing, walking, trying to not to go over macronutrient recommendations, and a lot of fruits and veggies, she gave me her blessing.2 -
I get it frequently ..
Them: Wow, you lost weight, how did you do it?
Me: Well, I'm on this radical new plan where you eat less and move more.
Them: I'm being serious
Me: Me too.
As far as the mentality that you have to give up the things you love to lose weight; There is an entire class of people that thinks that being overweight is a moral failing. Christian tradition considers gluttony and sloth to be deadly sins. Dieting can be seen as a form of atonement, and should involve a degree of punishment. These people need it to be hard, and to suck. For their souls.
And there's the people that want the easy fix too.
Just my $0.023 -
@Alatariel75 you're a riot!
@DS41980 what an annoying co-worker - I'd be irritated with her too.
Since she didn't say it, I will: Great job - your hard work has really paid off!
Awwww Thanks!
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Alatariel75 wrote: »Tell them you lost weight by doing exactly the same as usual, but you suck on a pinecone for 30 minutes each night.
I literally laughed out loud2 -
My eye doctor (who is very over weight) asked me and I said, "Less food and more exercise," and I mentioned MFP.
She said, "I don't want to do THAT."
Okay then.6 -
I understand completely. Everyone wants the quick fix, some miracle weight loss and when you tell them that you achieved your loss through hard work, diet and exercise then they are no longer interested. You can see the change in their attitude. Just remember that you are doing this the right way. I keep saying to my friends and family that I can't let my diet control my life. When things come up, I adapt my diet to what is going on in my life.
Keep up the good work!2 -
tinamarie6624 wrote: »I understand completely. Everyone wants the quick fix, some miracle weight loss and when you tell them that you achieved your loss through hard work, diet and exercise then they are no longer interested. You can see the change in their attitude. Just remember that you are doing this the right way. I keep saying to my friends and family that I can't let my diet control my life. When things come up, I adapt my diet to what is going on in my life.
Keep up the good work!
Thank you!0 -
I'm a big believer in not eliminating anything you love from your life. That just makes you miserable. Just have less of it, if it's a real "baddie." Fortunately, I'm generally happy with a tiny bite of a sweet.0
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Always. Of all the people who have asked how I'm losing weight, only one listened. Everyone else had an opinion about what works better, what I should be doing, and that there was some magical cure. Even a medical practice tried to tell me that I needed to stop counting calories and "lose weight the right way" by cutting carbs.
My food diary is full of pizza, wings, booze, ice cream...you name it. It's also full of a lot of nutritious low cal foods like oatmeal, veggies and fruits. I've given up nothing, lost an entire person's worth of weight, and gained a whole new life.6 -
Honestly, most don't know any better. Every diet ad ever screams, "COUNTING CALORIES IS TOO HARD!!!," then proceeds to try to sell their "easy" product. And people listen.3
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I would say that if you've never thought there had to be some kind of special diet or exercise plan or gimmick to lose weight, you'd be very much in the minority.
The diet and fitness industry at large perpetuates these things...that's how they became a multi billion dollar industry. Pick up pretty much any diet/fitness magazine and you're going to read about how "evil" carbs are...so it would make sense that she would inquire about that...that's kind of what's out there right now.
With all of the nonsense out there and with much of it coming out of the diet and fitness industry (an industry that people think they can trust), it's not really surprising that people would think you needed to do something special to lose weight.
And to be fair, while I would agree that it just comes down to calories, most people I know who've had success and then successfully maintained have substantially changed the way they live their lives. I've maintained for over 3.5 years and my diet is substantively different than it was four years ago when I first started...I eat much healthier...much more whole foods...plenty of veggies, etc and I exercise on the regular which I didn't do before.
ETA: Calorie counting also isn't for everyone and people have had success with various plans. Calorie counting was ultimately a big negative for me as I became overly obsessive about the numbers and pretty much a nut job...I personally do much better just eating really well most of the time and treating myself on occasions. My eating is modeled largely on Phase III of South Beach...but I eat vegetarian a few days per week so I tend to eat higher carbs than you would typically see with SB.2 -
I actually had someone roll their eyes at me and walk away when they asked how I lost weight and I said eating less and exercising more...this is not rocket science...3
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Yes but to be fair, I thought for years that I had to cut the foods I love forever if I wanted to lose too (and maintain my weight loss later)... Unfortunately, that you just have to eat less doesn't make money so nobody's talking about it.
I agree with this! Before MFP I had no idea how "easy" losing weight is. I use to get so frustrated with losing weight because I did not know how to. Before you could have told me to tap my foot 150x before each meal and I'd lose weight, I promise you I would have been tapping a hole in the floor.
Fitness is a billion dollar industry, and its not from educating the general public, it is from preying on them.4 -
I'm lucky because I work with someone who exercises everyday. She noticed that I started eating differently (no more fast food at my desk) and stopped drinking Coke and much more water. She compliments me from time to time and says how I do look so much better. She gets it, though. Others? They'll sit there a complain and moan about how huge they are but keep filling their faces with serving after serving. They see my logging on my phone and they say that's such a pain in the butt. Ummm....but you can spend hours playing Candy Crush Soda Saga?3
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tell here you discovered this amazing new gimmick
its called KEYCOH (say it outloud and never tell her what it stands for)
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shredcamps wrote: »tell here you discovered this amazing new gimmick
its called KEYCOH (say it outloud and never tell her what it stands for)
I thought it was SEE-Koh?!? Crap, I've been telling people the wrong thing!
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quiksylver296 wrote: »shredcamps wrote: »tell here you discovered this amazing new gimmick
its called KEYCOH (say it outloud and never tell her what it stands for)
I thought it was SEE-Koh?!? Crap, I've been telling people the wrong thing!
lol. you say tomato, i say tomAto
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