I have less self control while maintaining then I did while losing
srecupid
Posts: 660 Member
I went from around 250 pounds last september to about 165 this year. Well anyway the last couple of days have been brutal. I had about 500 calories leftover for the day after work and decided to go for a jalapeno mchicken which was 430. Well anyway the guy upsold me on a medium fries for $1 more which was 340. So yeah I'm over already. And part of me just snaps when I'm already over my goal. I just don't stop and tell myself i'll try again tomorrow I just keep eating and eating and eating. When I was losing weight it was easy because I had some kind of goal to focus on. Now I think I'm kinda rebelling against the "rules" i set for myself by forcing a certain amount of calories on myself. Anyone go through this and have any advice? The good knews is I know I'm doing it. The bad news is I have no *kitten* clue how to stop it.
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I am having something similar at the moment. I have to tell myself that I'm used to eating too much, and it's okay to want more, and that I can't expect to feel satisfied at all times. But it's also okay to eat a bit too much now and then, as long as I don't do it all the time, and when I feel okay, I don't feel the urge to eat all the time.3
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Maybe you should consider a different kind of goal now. Have you considered a lean strength training bulk? Maybe you'd be happier if you started seasonal bulking, and cutting.5
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I think maintaining can be even more difficult that losing! I think the difficulty with calorie counting to maintain is that it has to be precise. Obviously if you have a figure for a 500 deficit while losing, for instance, then it doesn't matter too much if you go over by 100 calories every other day. You'll just lose slightly slower. But if you do that when maintaining, then you'll slowly gain.
Personally, I found it easier NOT to count calories when maintaining. I still had to be vigilant and keep in control, and I did that in various ways - weighing daily, portion control, only eating at meal times and so on. Sometimes I found it helped to keep a diary of what I was eating, even I didn't count the calories. Writing it down seemed to keep me on track. I do think changing things every now and then seems to help, especially if you're getting frustrated with what you're doing. But this is just what has worked for me personally, of course.
The other thing, I think, is accepting that occasionally you're going to have a bad day, or a bad weekend, or even a bad week. You're going to maintain for life and that life may include job changes, house moves, bereavements, new family members, relationship breakdowns, illness, etc. etc. that might make it difficult to stick perfectly to your plan. So don't beat yourself up about the occasional blip - it's going to happen.
Well done on the weight lost, and good luck maintaining!12 -
Maybe you should consider a different kind of goal now.
It's good to have goals.3 -
Maybe you should consider a different kind of goal now. Have you considered a lean strength training bulk? Maybe you'd be happier if you started seasonal bulking, and cutting.
I want to start running but it's November in Chicago and I can't really afford weight training right now. I did just hike 5 miles stopping for a protein shake on the way so back on the wagon but maybe it would be easier to not binge if next meal wasnt always in the back of my mind like counting calories1 -
I lost a lot of weight one other time and people said it must have been hard. I didn't think losing the weight was nearly as hard as maintaining it and now I am back up and past where I was.
Thank you for starting this thread and I will check back when I am at my goal weight. Good luck to you and I hope the advice here helps!1 -
For me, the goal of maintenance is to not gain weight. Maybe I'm one of Those People who don't have a tough time maintaining after weight loss.7
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For starters it is too not worry about the 150 calories if I want to go over if I really want it. I look at the week for total calories goals.. So I might can go over 500, and maybe be cut a little on other days.
Its is and always will be a forever feet that I have to consciously do every single day. I have to watch what and how much I eat or I go right back to way I was.. I must always watch calories, make sure I keep up the exercise and make wise choices. It does not stop at weight loss.3 -
I've been maintaining for a few years. I look at my weekly calories rather than daily like a lot of people do. That way I can bank extra calories for those over days.5
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I understand your frustration and I'm battling it myself. I was 5 pounds away from my goal when I went on a cruise in September. I started out good, but by the end I had lost all control. I was determined to get back on track after getting home but its been a huge battle. Ever since, I have had good (disciplined) stretches and then something in my head says IDGAF and I end up eating fatty/sugary junk.
It doesn't make any sense that I could be so disciplined for 9 months and suddenly it's all gone in a few days. I've finally stayed on track for the last couple weeks, hopefully we can all keep our heads on straight this holiday season!2 -
I found maintaining much harder. I think one "problem", at least for me, is that it was less exciting. Seeing another 1-3 pounds lost every week was pretty exhilarating at the time. That's only one factor of course. I do think the "freedom" from meticulously tracking was a hindrance too. Meaning I tried to maintain on feel, rather than hard numbers. So I lost the battle and added around 90 pounds. OP, I hope you can get back on track so nothing so drastic happens to you, it is a bummer to have to grind through the process all over again. I've lost 30 of those added pounds, but still a ways to go...3
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Maintaining is not harder than losing and it can be as exiting and challenging as you want it to be. You guys are making it harder by just saying that it is harder. It is a frame of mind that you need to change. Be positive. Do you have pictures of your previous self? Well, if you do just look at them and ask yourself if you want to go back to "that,' or if you want to keep going froward.
If you haven't changed your relationship with food, then you haven't learn much during the losing stage and you are not setting a good example to those that are just starting or reaching maintenance already.
Eat with pleasure but understand that food is to live and not the other way around.
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I went from around 250 pounds last september to about 165 this year. Well anyway the last couple of days have been brutal. I had about 500 calories leftover for the day after work and decided to go for a jalapeno mchicken which was 430. Well anyway the guy upsold me on a medium fries for $1 more which was 340. So yeah I'm over already. And part of me just snaps when I'm already over my goal. I just don't stop and tell myself i'll try again tomorrow I just keep eating and eating and eating. When I was losing weight it was easy because I had some kind of goal to focus on. Now I think I'm kinda rebelling against the "rules" i set for myself by forcing a certain amount of calories on myself. Anyone go through this and have any advice? The good knews is I know I'm doing it. The bad news is I have no *kitten* clue how to stop it.
Are you gaining since you are eating a bit more?1 -
I find with maintaining that having a weekly caloric and a weekly fitness goal feels more freeing and less of a task than daily goals. It gives the flexibility to enjoy your weekends/downtime and than the other days you can be a bit more focused on staying on the maintenance track. It certainly becomes easier over time with the right mental attitude but without the restrictions of losing weight. Once you make it part of your everyday lifestyle (ie. a habit or routine) just like work, paying bills, walking the dog, etc you will think about it less and it will happen naturally.
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Just wanted to say I totally feel you OP. I hit goal at the beginning of September, dropped a little too far with hard training into the underweight category and after freaking out about that did something collosally stupid (ate some of my daughters' birthday cake after being keto for 7 months) which has spiraled into me feeling totally out of control and being up above my maintenance weight threshold for about a week now. Going back into serious cut phase tomorrow and am seriously disappointed in myself
I kept attempting this "eat treats in moderation" that people love to espouse on here but this ignores the fact that I apparently can't moderate treat foods, I swear to God I've tried . My solution is to bite the bullet, go back to keto with my tail between my legs and accept I can never eat cake again if I don't want to be fat and hate myself (and before someone jumps all over me no I am not suggesting that other people cannot eat cake and be thin and happy, I am suggesting I am a moron who literally can't be trusted with confections lol)
I hope you figure out something more moderate than I have so you can have your McSammich and fries and maintain your weight too OP, hang in there7 -
Interesting thread. After about 9 months of steady losing I went into maintenance a few months ago 2 lbs away from my original goal. I was just tired. For the last month now I have been sitting at +4lbs at the higher end of my maintenance range you could say. Yikes.
So now I am now back in a deficit phase to try to get to my original goal of 145 lbs by Christmas.
For me the maintenance phase is trickier than the deficit phase was specifically because in maintenance I am eating more foods which are difficult to measure. So my CICO calculations are 'looser'. For me that is a slippery slope. If I can count exact calories then it seems I can keep my weight steady but as soon as the CICO accuracy slides then my weight only slides in one direction - UP!
Not sure if that makes sense to anyone.
So, for now - at least until Christmas - I am back tracking as diligently as I can - to keep a deficit and get these last few #@$*#()@_*$( lbs off.3 -
A bit of tough love here but if you don't exercise some self control then you will end up back where you started. Then you'll have to go through the whole process again! Moderation is key especially when maintaing, instead of a whole large pizza, have a medium etc.10
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I am totally with you all! Losing the weight (160 lbs at best) was much easier than maintaining..... As soon as I eat a little more I just seem to go wild, Since reaching goal, I have been gaining and then losing about 20 lbs over and over - is that what normal eating is?? I think that so long as I keep an eye and don't let any gains go too far then it is manageable.0
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sercupid - That's completely normal, I did a similar thing about 15 years ago, but if it helps have stayed about 170 since then. I think your body has a set point and it takes a while for it to adjust to the new set point. I've always found if you eat more than you would like, just do some body weight exercises to make up for it. Squats, Press ups, Sit ups etc, you might find you enjoy them! You'll still fluctuate naturally anyway, however I would stay away from McD's. The quantity of sugar in thier "so called" food will throw a spanner in the works with your blood sugar. Good luck1
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I believe that a body can be defective in small ways, such as needing glasses or hearing aids. You and I have a particular defect that tells us to eat too much. Add to that a world in which food is not scarce and we will tend to gain weight. If we were living during times of scarcity, this tendency might help us survive. Therefore, simply accept that it may always feel like someone is whispering in your ear telling you to overeat. A person who is naturally slim and athletic cannot teach you anything about this problem because they don't hear the voice. You simply need to devise a system to ignore the bad advice this voice is giving you and get the right amount of food and exercise.9
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I believe that a body can be defective in small ways, such as needing glasses or hearing aids. You and I have a particular defect that tells us to eat too much. Add to that a world in which food is not scarce and we will tend to gain weight. If we were living during times of scarcity, this tendency might help us survive. Therefore, simply accept that it may always feel like someone is whispering in your ear telling you to overeat. A person who is naturally slim and athletic cannot teach you anything about this problem because they don't hear the voice. You simply need to devise a system to ignore the bad advice this voice is giving you and get the right amount of food and exercise.
Utter rubbish.4 -
I got really hungry when I brought my calories up to maintenance even though I did it gradually week by week for over a month. I thought something was wrong but I posted a thread here on 'maintenance' and found out increased hunger is definately a thing that happens in early maintenance for a short time.
Now that I'm usually eating maintenance (some days more, some days less) but on average I'm eating over what maintenance calories should be according to mfp. I'm not gaining at all and surprized! My hunger has gone back down to normal. At least I'm satisfied with what I eat every day, which explains why some days I just eat more, or less, depending on my hungeries.
I left quite a gap between my calorie loss plan and my maintenance though. I have about 350 more calories to eat in maintenance, so this may be a factor, according to how you lost.
So far, except for the first month I find maintenance way easier than losing. The increased energy makes me a much more active person. I take on more tasks and do a lot more walking just for errands and interest, my regular calesthenics, yoga routine is more enjoyable and I out more into it which I think is from the added energy from eating more.
Hey, its just one day!
Best wishes to you. I also would find it hard to resist a dollar discount on the fries!1 -
trigden1991 wrote: »I believe that a body can be defective in small ways, such as needing glasses or hearing aids. You and I have a particular defect that tells us to eat too much. Add to that a world in which food is not scarce and we will tend to gain weight. If we were living during times of scarcity, this tendency might help us survive. Therefore, simply accept that it may always feel like someone is whispering in your ear telling you to overeat. A person who is naturally slim and athletic cannot teach you anything about this problem because they don't hear the voice. You simply need to devise a system to ignore the bad advice this voice is giving you and get the right amount of food and exercise.
Utter rubbish.
I don't think this is rubbish at all, and I'm sorry to see a new member attacked like this when they're trying to help. I think it's a good analogy, in fact - I didn't have the impulse to eat too much when I was young, slim and athletic, but I do now. And I do think that part of maintenance has recognising that - it doesn't go away, just because you've reached goal weight. You have to deal with it constantly. I have talked to other "maintainers" who have the same issue, and have to always be vigilant. That might be the case for everybody, but I think it's worth being aware that it happens to some.14 -
Sometimes I have to remind myself that the weight can come back on...if I let this lifestyle stop. Hate to admit it, but sometimes I do have this mentality like "I am DONE! Hellzzz yea, mutha *kitten*, I did it!" and I don't really care what I eat nor pay attention. I guess that's the key, my attention to detail goes out the window sometimes. Nevertheless, my "good" days outweigh the "bad" days in maintenance. Plus, I do acknowledge how well I feel when I treat my body right!1
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I'm in the same boat OP. That's why I keep a deficit whenever I can, lol (my goal is 400 calories under my TDEE), so if I decide to have an extra 300 calories a couple days a week, it evens out. It's mental for me though - when I see that I have fewer calories left, I make better choices 90% of the time. And when I actually hit it.. great! That's 400 calories banked for next time. If I go over a bit... chances are I'm still at maintenance. If I go over a lot... well, I probably had 800-1000 calories banked this week, so it's all good.
That's how I've been maintaining for 2.5 years now, but I've also never worried about losing too much weight (I'd still love to lose a few pounds, it's just not happening). I know that if I had my goal set at maintenance, I'd just be too comfortable eating to goal most days (probably eating junk to get there), so if I went over too much, I'd end up gaining.
The bottom line is that we all have bad days, but there are also good days when you can make up for it.9 -
I went from around 250 pounds last september to about 165 this year. Well anyway the last couple of days have been brutal. I had about 500 calories leftover for the day after work and decided to go for a jalapeno mchicken which was 430. Well anyway the guy upsold me on a medium fries for $1 more which was 340. So yeah I'm over already. And part of me just snaps when I'm already over my goal. I just don't stop and tell myself i'll try again tomorrow I just keep eating and eating and eating. When I was losing weight it was easy because I had some kind of goal to focus on. Now I think I'm kinda rebelling against the "rules" i set for myself by forcing a certain amount of calories on myself. Anyone go through this and have any advice? The good knews is I know I'm doing it. The bad news is I have no *kitten* clue how to stop it.
Well, the good news is that your maintenance calories isn't exactly XXXX calories...your maintenance calories are a range and the human body is very adept at using excess energy in the short run...the human body strives for homeostasis so in the short run it will simply speed up or slow down processes to compensate for more or less energy...you have to consistently underfeed or overfeed to override your body's ability to maintain homeostasis.4 -
I have the problem with maintenance and the urge to over eat also. I think many of us who have had true weight issues have unhealthy relationships with food. We might consider going to Over Eaters Anonymous to acquire the skills we will need to maintain our weight loss for the remainder of our lives.1
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Totally OP. I do try to do a couple day s in a deficit with the hopes it helps keep me in my weight range.
I was great 95% of the time, then maint...just is killing me.... Clean foods, non-clean...mentally I'm in an attitude of I don't care. Hoping to change that and get back into wanting to eat right.
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Totally OP. I do try to do a couple day s in a deficit with the hopes it helps keep me in my weight range.
I was great 95% of the time, then maint...just is killing me.... Clean foods, non-clean...mentally I'm in an attitude of I don't care. Hoping to change that and get back into wanting to eat right.
Yeah I set my goal to half pound a week for next ferw days or so to see what happens. I weighed my self at about 163 this morning which is about 3 pounds more than the lowest weight I ever recorded that was probably a fluke.0
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