Relationship with Exercise

Nope.

Some people believe in "no pain no gain." You know it was a good workout if you're walking funny. You do it because it's a chore. It's easy to come up with excuses not to go out and run, but you persevere and do it anyway.

On the other end of the spectrum, things like having sex and riding a bike count as exercise. You probably don't think of them as workouts, you do them because they're enjoyable, the fitness and calorie burn are just the icing on the cake. You'd do them even if they were bad for you.

If you can find things you enjoy, your relationship with exercise will daydreaming about being able to do it while you're at work.

lcdoglover wrote: »

I have been working on my relationship with food the past couple of months which has been hard work. Now I've come to the realization that I have a bad relationship with exercise as well; I avoid it in fear of the old ways: negative self talk, punishing workouts, constant comparisons to others. I need a better relationship with exercise now and wondered if anyone else was working on this too?

When I first started this whole thing over four years ago, I felt as though every training bout had to be a sufferfest and it had to happen everyday or I just wasn't putting in the work.

A couple of things changed my mind about this. For one, rather than just willy nilly going into the weight room and doing whatever, I picked up a structured program...after reading through it, I could see that what I was doing before was doing more harm than good from a fitness standpoint and by not allowing for rest, I was hampering my gains.

This also started to make me think about what else I was doing wrong. At the time, my cardiovascular work consisted of a hodgepodge of randomness all done for the express purpose of burning as many calories as possible rather than having some kind of concrete training objective...I had zero structure and from a fitness standpoint, I was just spinning my wheels. Since I was doing a structured lifting program, I thought surely there must be other structured programs for runners or swimmers or cyclists, etc...sure enough, there are many. Not knowing exactly what I wanted to do, I just looked through several different training programs and I could see that they all had things in common...they all provided for various training intensities throughout the week and the whole of the program...not everything was balls out...and they all provided for appropriate rest/recovery and they all had a protocol for tapering close to an event.

So that was it...I decided to sign up for an event...I signed myself up for a 5K run and then started following a training protocol for that. Initially it was a bit hard to change my mindset from "burn as many calories as possible" to "training this way will be more positive for your fitness"...but ultimately as the fitness gains came, I began to understand and really look at exercise and fitness for the sake of fitness and overall health and well being...ultimately, the calories take care of themselves.

I did a few 5K runs, but something was still off...basically, I was training better, but I wasn't particularly enjoying it...I wasn't all that fond of running. Right around that time my mom asked me if I was interested in doing a sprint triathlon with her...basically I was like, "sure...that's sounds fun and different"...so I started following a training program for that. Unfortunately, an injury prevented me from completing the training or from participation in the event...but a huge positive came out of it...I re-discovered my bike and a passion for riding.

I've been on my bike ever since and have trained for and participated in a number of events including endurance tour rides and time trials...still haven't tried my hand a criterium. My training protocol varies depending on what kind of event I'm doing which keeps things interesting...and then I have my off season (now) where I just allow myself to go ride for the sheer pleasure of riding or throw the bike on my trainer and doing a spin session...

At any rate, I think structure is a very good thing where training is concerned...I also think you ultimately need to enjoy what you do. A long Sunday morning ride doesn't feel like work to me...it's something I very much look forward to.

I'll echo everyone else and say that finding activity you love and not comparing yourself to others is very important. Years ago I would spend at least an hour a day walking on the treadmill. I tried as hard as I could to become a runner but it just wasn't going to happen due to neck issues. So, I spent that entire 60 minutes every day wishing I could be like the lady that was also on the treadmill every day running for 90 minutes and it seemed effortless for her. In other words, I wasted every single one of those minutes being negative and not focusing on my own body and effort.

I finally got tired of it and decided I would be my own competition and when I started concentrating on my own efforts and accomplishments I finally started seeing results. I also realized that I didn't really want to be a runner. I wanted to find an activity that I could do seemingly effortlessly as well. I realized I liked walking incline and speed intervals instead. Eventually I moved on to lifting and that was a game-changer as far as physical and mental changes.

So, OP, try a bunch of different things even if you think initially you might not like them.

I was never one to exercise but when I started on my fitness journey back in 2012 I knew it was time for change in both eating and exercise habits.
I decided to walk every single day. What started as a chore became a pleasure.
Do something you think you'd love and in time you'll get to really enjoy it
P.s I went from walking to doing YouTube workouts to running and strength training. Still do em all yet and enjoy being fit and active (also have some impressive muscles )

i'm still really squirmy when i get in a room irl and everyone starts going on about how much they Love Exercising and Fitness is a Passion of theirs. i'm passionate about deep chairs and good books, so i don't think that reflex will ever leave me. and dark chocolate.

for a woman with who's 80% couch potato and 20% attitude i sure move around a lot though. i think what i do works for me because i do all of it on my own terms. i got into it for my own reasons, and some of them were probably pretty perverse, or even just plain silly. but i started to do the stuff that i do when i got to a point in my life where it fit in, both mentally and logistically, so it worked for me.

and i do what i do. i've noticed that people irl get a very one-dimensional idea of me when they see me on a bike. they think i'm a full-on jock, and then they catch me having a smoke and their brains melt. but nothing could be further from true. i just really like the two specific things that i'm into doing, and that's the main reason i'm doing them.

i don't think it takes much more than that. find something you like, and if you like doing it then keep doing it. if you don't like something right next door to it, who cares. you don't have to buy the whole package; you can customize it so it works for you.

'relationship' is a pretty good word for the context, really. just because you're into one type doesn't mean you have to date the whole population, you know? it's about finding something that you're happy with.

canadianlbs wrote: »

i'm still really squirmy when i get in a room irl and everyone starts going on about how much they Love Exercising and Fitness is a Passion of theirs. i'm passionate about deep chairs and good books, so i don't think that reflex will ever leave me. and dark chocolate.

...

and i do what i do. i've noticed that people irl get a very one-dimensional idea of me when they see me on a bike. they think i'm a full-on jock...

I'm guessing you don't think of riding a bike as "exercise and fitness." It's riding a bike, the other stuff is a side effect. Is that right? Or even close to the truth? It's what I get out of your post.

It's also the secret. Like everyone is saying, once you find whatever it is for you, it just stops being a struggle.

NorthCascades wrote: »

I'm guessing you don't think of riding a bike as "exercise and fitness."

idk. i'm allergic to the word fitness. to me it's sort of meaningless, actually, like how-much-is-a-heap. so there's that, and i guess it's also just the easier option for me. i hate everything about being trapped in a car except for having the freedom to talk to myself. and you can do that on a bike anyway so long as you're either faster or slower than everyone else

so transportation cycling works for me for a range of reasons. i wouldn't do it if it was just 'exercise' and i'd rather eat glue than come home from work, dump my stuff and then leave home again just for the sake of fulfilling somebody else's prescription about how to live.

don't ask me to explain how come lifting's different; it's just something that for some reason i really like. but when i'm not lifting i'm in pyjamas 3 minutes after unlocking the door. and when i'm not on my way to somewhere my bike stays locked up downstairs. i don't think i have ever gone for a bike ride just for the sake of taking a ride. not in my adult life anyway.