We broke up because...

He refused to eat the mushrooms I picked up for him on my hikes

Refused to eat anything I cooked for him, fungi or 'possums, won't matter

never liked my food well done.........

Her casserole looked suspiciously like cat....and well..neighbourhood cats were disappearing

She hissed at me and tried to claw me ..

Didn't understand that only one of us could be boss..and that was me..wouldn't do as she was told

I couldn't understand a word she said and how did she manage to become my boss

She won't show me what was hiding in her pouch

Called me Skippy

Didn't feel right when she said "get in bed skippy"