People Who Waited for Sex Before Marriage?

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Replies

  • CSARdiver
    CSARdiver Posts: 6,257 Member
    I swear couples should have a checklist on compatibility before they make this commitment. Everyone has an idea of what manner and frequency they think is normal, which may no be normal or simply bat *kitten* crazy to another.
  • melmelw03
    melmelw03 Posts: 5,338 Member

    We're going to hell @Dannigreen31

    Worth it tho, who wants to be surrounded by angels anyway? :D

    So like, are y'all married? Or nah?
    I noticed you have the same mfp last names....
    Inquiring minds are dying to know.
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    That's why the butt sex was invented. FYI- Butt sex isn't sex.

    It's funny because there are people that are actually serious about that. I dated a girl in college and we had been seeing each other for about a month...we were getting pretty hot and heavy back at my apartment and she stopped me and told me there was something I should know...I couldn't have sex with her because she was a virgin and saving herself for marriage. I was a little taken back and probably had a funny look on my face because then she was like, "it's ok though...we can do other stuff...I give pretty good head and you can put it in my butt...but my vagina is off limits."

    WtCB6.gif

    Odd that the vagina is sacred but the booty is fair play...

    There are no words. All i did was LOL!
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    That's why the butt sex was invented. FYI- Butt sex isn't sex.

    It's funny because there are people that are actually serious about that. I dated a girl in college and we had been seeing each other for about a month...we were getting pretty hot and heavy back at my apartment and she stopped me and told me there was something I should know...I couldn't have sex with her because she was a virgin and saving herself for marriage. I was a little taken back and probably had a funny look on my face because then she was like, "it's ok though...we can do other stuff...I give pretty good head and you can put it in my butt...but my vagina is off limits."

    WtCB6.gif

    Odd that the vagina is sacred but the booty is fair play...

    LOL! Good thing she has her priorities in order! Wouldn't wanna mess up the vajayjay...but everything else is fair game!

    If she married, I bet that guy is disappointed...all he probably gets is vagina since married and all...

    I also wonder how that conversation would go..."I've been saving myself for you babe...well, except for my *kitten* and my mouth...but my vajayjay has never been used."

    OMG I am literally rolling!!!! :D

    Please stop!!! LMAO!!!
  • melmelw03
    melmelw03 Posts: 5,338 Member
    melmelw03 wrote: »

    We're going to hell @Dannigreen31

    Worth it tho, who wants to be surrounded by angels anyway? :D

    So like, are y'all married? Or nah?
    I noticed you have the same mfp last names....
    Inquiring minds are dying to know.

    Not yet ... she'll be Mrs Green next year though :D

    Inquiring minds? Pray tell :smile:

    OMG congrats! Is there a pic of the ring? I love a good romantic story. Mostly because I'm an old divorced woman and am destined to die a lonely cat lady without cats.
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    That's why the butt sex was invented. FYI- Butt sex isn't sex.

    It's funny because there are people that are actually serious about that. I dated a girl in college and we had been seeing each other for about a month...we were getting pretty hot and heavy back at my apartment and she stopped me and told me there was something I should know...I couldn't have sex with her because she was a virgin and saving herself for marriage. I was a little taken back and probably had a funny look on my face because then she was like, "it's ok though...we can do other stuff...I give pretty good head and you can put it in my butt...but my vagina is off limits."

    WtCB6.gif

    Odd that the vagina is sacred but the booty is fair play...

    Did you marry her, though?

    Lol...no...she ended up being kind of a weirdo.

    Not surprising. Her logic is weird.
  • Dannigreen31
    Dannigreen31 Posts: 557 Member
    melmelw03 wrote: »

    We're going to hell @Dannigreen31

    Worth it tho, who wants to be surrounded by angels anyway? :D

    So like, are y'all married? Or nah?
    I noticed you have the same mfp last names....
    Inquiring minds are dying to know.

    Not yet ... she'll be Mrs Green next year though :D

    Inquiring minds? Pray tell :smile:

    So yinz are engaged? Another inquiring mind here

    Yep :smile:

    Went for an Emerald ring rather than diamond, being green and all that!

    Is this like a real life thing or an mfp thing because sometimes it's hard to tell the difference

    We met through MFP, buts it's very much a real life thing :)

    y7kr3r343qho.png

    Congrats and good choice on the ring. I like different.

    That filter hahah <3 awww yeh it's all real
  • NorthCascades
    NorthCascades Posts: 10,968 Member
    CSARdiver wrote: »
    I swear couples should have a checklist on compatibility before they make this commitment. Everyone has an idea of what manner and frequency they think is normal, which may no be normal or simply bat *kitten* crazy to another.

    When one partner is in the mood and the other isn't, how does the couple resolve that? Whoever isn't feeling it has ultimate veto power? One of them has to do their duty? Schedule intercourse ahead of time to take the anxiety and guesswork (and spontaneity) out of it?

    I think this is exactly the kind of thing a checklist can't work for, because of "unknown unknowns" as Rummy put it.
  • angelxsss
    angelxsss Posts: 2,402 Member
    CSARdiver wrote: »
    I swear couples should have a checklist on compatibility before they make this commitment. Everyone has an idea of what manner and frequency they think is normal, which may no be normal or simply bat *kitten* crazy to another.

    When one partner is in the mood and the other isn't, how does the couple resolve that? Whoever isn't feeling it has ultimate veto power? One of them has to do their duty? Schedule intercourse ahead of time to take the anxiety and guesswork (and spontaneity) out of it?

    I think this is exactly the kind of thing a checklist can't work for, because of "unknown unknowns" as Rummy put it.

    I've heard guys don't like it if you just "do your duty" because they can tell you're not into it and that makes it not fun to do.
  • chocolate_owl
    chocolate_owl Posts: 1,695 Member
    melmelw03 wrote: »
    melmelw03 wrote: »

    We're going to hell @Dannigreen31

    Worth it tho, who wants to be surrounded by angels anyway? :D

    So like, are y'all married? Or nah?
    I noticed you have the same mfp last names....
    Inquiring minds are dying to know.

    Not yet ... she'll be Mrs Green next year though :D

    Inquiring minds? Pray tell :smile:

    OMG congrats! Is there a pic of the ring? I love a good romantic story. Mostly because I'm an old divorced woman and am destined to die a lonely cat lady without cats.

    55grmxvbjnpc.png

    Well that's a pic of the ring (on the website of the store I bought it from)

    Danielle you'll have to upload a pic of your finger so these guys can see it my love ❤️

    Soooo pretty. Good choice. My redheaded, green-eyed friend got an emerald engagement ring in a gold setting, and it's stunning. I think it's one of the prettiest stones out there. I love it when people get really personal with their rings - my wedding band has diamonds for my birth month and amethyst for husband's birth month. Just makes it all the more meaningful to me.
  • NorthCascades
    NorthCascades Posts: 10,968 Member
    angelxsss wrote: »
    CSARdiver wrote: »
    I swear couples should have a checklist on compatibility before they make this commitment. Everyone has an idea of what manner and frequency they think is normal, which may no be normal or simply bat *kitten* crazy to another.

    When one partner is in the mood and the other isn't, how does the couple resolve that? Whoever isn't feeling it has ultimate veto power? One of them has to do their duty? Schedule intercourse ahead of time to take the anxiety and guesswork (and spontaneity) out of it?

    I think this is exactly the kind of thing a checklist can't work for, because of "unknown unknowns" as Rummy put it.

    I've heard guys don't like it if you just "do your duty" because they can tell you're not into it and that makes it not fun to do.

    Depends on the guy. And the lady. If you're not into it but do it anyway, he might take it as a gift of love and be heartwarmed; he might be hurt that you aren't into him at that moment; he might want to but not because he thinks it would be wrong. Plus there are also different kinds of not into it, from "I want space now" to "sex isn't what I had in mind but doesn't sound bad either" and his guess about which one it is might influence his reaction.

    Every couple has mismatched libidos. Our sex drives wax and wane like the moon, and they're individual things on top of it. Depending how important sex is to each partner, that can cause a lot of stress in a relationship. Or not. I think how people approach these things is a lot more important than just how often.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,277 Member
    dbanks80 wrote: »
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    That's why the butt sex was invented. FYI- Butt sex isn't sex.

    It's funny because there are people that are actually serious about that. I dated a girl in college and we had been seeing each other for about a month...we were getting pretty hot and heavy back at my apartment and she stopped me and told me there was something I should know...I couldn't have sex with her because she was a virgin and saving herself for marriage. I was a little taken back and probably had a funny look on my face because then she was like, "it's ok though...we can do other stuff...I give pretty good head and you can put it in my butt...but my vagina is off limits."

    WtCB6.gif

    Odd that the vagina is sacred but the booty is fair play...

    Did you marry her, though?

    Lol...no...she ended up being kind of a weirdo.

    Not surprising. Her logic is weird.

    I have a friend who teaches highschool at a private Christian school...he tells me that this kind of logic isn't all that uncommon...weird.
  • angelxsss
    angelxsss Posts: 2,402 Member
    angelxsss wrote: »
    CSARdiver wrote: »
    I swear couples should have a checklist on compatibility before they make this commitment. Everyone has an idea of what manner and frequency they think is normal, which may no be normal or simply bat *kitten* crazy to another.

    When one partner is in the mood and the other isn't, how does the couple resolve that? Whoever isn't feeling it has ultimate veto power? One of them has to do their duty? Schedule intercourse ahead of time to take the anxiety and guesswork (and spontaneity) out of it?

    I think this is exactly the kind of thing a checklist can't work for, because of "unknown unknowns" as Rummy put it.

    I've heard guys don't like it if you just "do your duty" because they can tell you're not into it and that makes it not fun to do.

    Depends on the guy. And the lady. If you're not into it but do it anyway, he might take it as a gift of love and be heartwarmed; he might be hurt that you aren't into him at that moment; he might want to but not because he thinks it would be wrong. Plus there are also different kinds of not into it, from "I want space now" to "sex isn't what I had in mind but doesn't sound bad either" and his guess about which one it is might influence his reaction.

    Every couple has mismatched libidos. Our sex drives wax and wane like the moon, and they're individual things on top of it. Depending how important sex is to each partner, that can cause a lot of stress in a relationship. Or not. I think how people approach these things is a lot more important than just how often.

    This is the thing that terrifies me.
  • 777Gemma888
    777Gemma888 Posts: 9,580 Member
    edited December 2016
    Hail from a culture where virginity is upheld. Kinda hypocritical when the "first rights" can be claimed by any of your spouse's senior male relatives (by blood/position).

    At 13 when we're walked through the "birds and the bees" talk at school addressed by the "Tampon Lady" and the school shrink, I saw sex as it was, separate and set apart from my culture. During Christmas that year my mum shared with us that we may want to follow the route her friends took, which is save the front (for culture ) and offer the butt along with everything else or partial entry ( only if we trust the guy to not go all in - breaking the hymen). Preservation of virginity is important for cultures like mine, because within the 4 days you+spouse copulate, the public (his people + your people) await the results ... The more dominant in bed spouse vs the woman's blood stain on tribal cloth as proof of chastity until consummation.

    Naturally, I have lived a life negating this practice. Refused to shame myself or my betrothed with marriage bed crashers or have any children we would have had - their paternity questioned. Opting out was a better solution to a revirgination(hymenoplasty) surgery. Both my sis and I have friends who have gone through it for the cultural marriages - we're not of the same ethnic backgrounds. Same rules of virginity applied.

    Tldr: Sex before marriage? Yes.

    ETA: For us, the suggestion of butt sex is so that the woman gets to enjoy sex with a man who may/most likely cares/respects her more than the prospective husband. Memory of "joy having sex". Your chosen VS the ine chosen for you.
  • chocolate_owl
    chocolate_owl Posts: 1,695 Member
    angelxsss wrote: »
    angelxsss wrote: »
    CSARdiver wrote: »
    I swear couples should have a checklist on compatibility before they make this commitment. Everyone has an idea of what manner and frequency they think is normal, which may no be normal or simply bat *kitten* crazy to another.

    When one partner is in the mood and the other isn't, how does the couple resolve that? Whoever isn't feeling it has ultimate veto power? One of them has to do their duty? Schedule intercourse ahead of time to take the anxiety and guesswork (and spontaneity) out of it?

    I think this is exactly the kind of thing a checklist can't work for, because of "unknown unknowns" as Rummy put it.

    I've heard guys don't like it if you just "do your duty" because they can tell you're not into it and that makes it not fun to do.

    Depends on the guy. And the lady. If you're not into it but do it anyway, he might take it as a gift of love and be heartwarmed; he might be hurt that you aren't into him at that moment; he might want to but not because he thinks it would be wrong. Plus there are also different kinds of not into it, from "I want space now" to "sex isn't what I had in mind but doesn't sound bad either" and his guess about which one it is might influence his reaction.

    Every couple has mismatched libidos. Our sex drives wax and wane like the moon, and they're individual things on top of it. Depending how important sex is to each partner, that can cause a lot of stress in a relationship. Or not. I think how people approach these things is a lot more important than just how often.

    This is the thing that terrifies me.

    Don't be terrified. Be open to talking about your needs and desires (or lack of them). Communication goes a long way toward finding an acceptable balance. And while I have no data to back this up, my personal experience has been that libidos fall along a bell curve - there's a very few people who want it all the time, a very few people who don't want it at all, and a bunch of people who want it often enough that their sex drives aren't *that* different and they can work through the disparities.
  • jenmar222
    jenmar222 Posts: 9,279 Member
    edited December 2016
    Swear I have the look of a pug about me ❤️

    Ssshhh!!! Don't be sayin that. My pug lust is real